


Not Brothers

by GenKay



Category: Cobra Kai (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Complicated Relationships, Corporal Punishment, Dark, Depression, Fights, Fist Fights, Forced Masturbation, Heavy Angst, Jealousy, M/M, Masturbation, Misunderstandings, Non-Consensual Spanking, Self-Harm, Sibling Rivalry, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Spanking, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-04 18:54:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 25
Words: 106,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25231198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GenKay/pseuds/GenKay
Summary: They weren't brothers. They could both agree on that. And that made their relationship a lot more complicated.Cobra Kai reimagined AU. Robby/Miguel centric but with a lot of plot. The Diazes move next door ages ago and Johnny gets his life together a lot sooner. Alternating pov - mostly between Robby and Miguel with Johnny's thrown in between every now and then.M/M. Occasional smut. Trigger warnings: Underage sex, Depression, Self-harm, violence and dub-con. Additional tags to be added with chapters. Slow-burn. Smut doesn't start until later.
Relationships: Miguel Diaz/Robby Keene, Robby Keene/Other(s)
Comments: 45
Kudos: 189





	1. Robby I

Robby should be proud of himself. Nine years old and he could already hide his emotions so well. His parents didn’t like it when he let his anger and disappointment show – they always told him he was acting like a brat. So he had learned to hide it. Keep his face blank. Didn’t mean he didn’t feel it though.

And there was plenty to be angry and disappointed about here. He got little enough time with his dad as it was. Like just a few days every month. This was supposed to be a special occasion. Johnny had said he had some good surprise for him and Robby had been looking forward to spending the evening together.

So who was this woman and why was she barging into their time together?

“Robby, I want you to meet Carmen. Carmen, this is Robby.” Johnny said. “Carmen is a very good friend of mine.”

“Hi, Robby.” Carmen said, leaning forward. “Johnny has told me so much about you.”

Robby nodded, smiling politely. He knew his manners, after all. And he was nine, not stupid. He knew what a “very good friend” was code for – Johnny had a new girlfriend. Still, that didn’t give her the right to butt in on their time. She had the rest of the month for that.

“Robby, this is my son, Miguel.” Carmen added. “Miguel, say hi to Robby.”

“Hello.” The skinny kid said shyly.

Robby had noticed him before, but hadn’t paid him much mind. Now that he saw him… well, the guy looked like a dork. All skin and gangly bones, shifting on his feet awkwardly and never looking at Robby for more than a fraction of a second.

“Carmen and Miguel live next door.” Johnny said, smiling. “And Miguel is nine-years old too. Same age as you. Isn’t that great? I’ve been spending a lot of time with them and they are both good friends of mine. I think you’ll like them too.”

Robby wasn’t sure he if he was able to hide his emotions at that. No one seemed to notice anything, but Robby felt like they must have. He felt as if a green snake called envy uncoiled in his stomach and slithered through his veins all over his body. _Good friends? Spending a lot of time?_ Was that why Johnny was calling him less frequently? Because he was interested in some other nine-year old kid? And _this_ dork at that?

Girlfriends, Robby could understand. There had been plenty of those before. Just like there had been plenty of boyfriends for mom. They all came and cooed and made some noises only to disappear after a while. But who was this kid? And why was Johnny such good friends with him?

“How about you two get to know each-other, huh?” Johnny said, clapping him on the shoulder. “Robby, why don’t you take him to the bedroom and show him some of your stuff?”

“Sure.” Robby said, somehow keeping his displeasure from his voice.

But he still had to let his displeasure be known. He bumped his shoulder into Miguel’s as he walked past him.

He didn’t bump him _that_ hard. The guy didn’t have to fall on his ass like that.

“ROBBY!” Johnny yelled, as Carmen helped her son up.

“It was an accident.” Robby defended himself immediately.

Miguel glared at him reproachfully and Robby crushed the bubble of rising guilt and glared back. _C’mon, don’t be such a pussy._

“Robby, apologize now!” Johnny said angrily.

“I already said it was an accident.” Robby repeated. You don’t apologize for accidents, right?

“Johnny, it’s fine. Really.” Carmen said, smiling, smoothing things over. “It was an accident. Right Miguel?”

“Sure.” Miguel said, still looking at Robby sullenly.

“Why don’t you guys just sit here and watch some TV while I get dinner ready?” Carmen suggested.

Over the next two hours or so, Robby found himself getting angrier. And more cranky. Turned out, the whole shy act was just that – an act. Once Miguel started yapping, there was no stopping him. He went on and on about some movie, about his friends, about his teachers. The guy talked so much that Robby couldn’t have gotten a word in edgewise even if he’d wanted to.

But the worst thing was that he wasn’t just talking at Robby’s dad, he was talking with him. Johnny clearly knew what he was talking about and it was never like that with Robby. With him, Johnny always had to interrupt with questions like “Who’s Cody?” and “Which one was Ms. Nolan again?” – but not with Miguel. He didn’t have to ask a single time. Which meant he’d been talking to Miguel a lot more than he’d been talking to Robby recently.

And that wasn’t fair. Not with how little time Johnny had for Robby in the first place. He was always busy with work – that’s what he told Robby every time he asked him why they couldn’t spend more time together. So if he was so busy, how was he spending all this time with Miguel?

And this night wasn’t fair either. It was supposed to be their special night. But these strangers just barged in and were taking up all of Johnny’s time. Everybody was focused on Miguel and the conversation didn’t turn back to Robby until the dinner was almost over.

“So Robby, Johnny tells me you have a birthday coming up soon?” Carmen asked, smiling. 

“Yeah…” Robby said, dreading where this was going.

“Big ten-oh, right?” Carmen continued. “You want to do something special that day?”

_With her? And Miguel? No thanks._

“Mom already has plans for that day.” Robby said, hoping there would be no follow-up.

“Really?” Johnny asked, smiling skeptically.

“Yes.” Robby insisted. “She is throwing me a party and inviting all my friends over.”

He didn’t know why he did that. There was always something in Johnny’s tone – some kind of mockery – that made Robby do that. It was like he was making fun of his mom and Robby didn’t like that.

It was a total lie, ofcourse. Shannon had already told Robby that they couldn’t afford a party. But she’d promised him a cake and that they’d do something special and that was good enough, right? There was no reason for Johnny to take that tone.

“I’m sure it’ll be lovely.” Carmen said. “And Miguel would love to come too -won’t you Miguel?”

“Yeah.” Miguel said, his face brightening at the prospect of a party.

 _Dammit._ They were calling his bluff. He couldn’t invite them to a party that wasn’t going to happen. And he couldn’t admit to lying. They’d just laugh at him. He had to find another way out.

“Sorry.” Robby said, putting on his best smug-face. “It’s gonna be a loser-free zone.”

Carmen’s smile disappeared and Miguel got that hurt look again that made Robby feel guilty. But he’d had no choice here, right?

“Robby, not cool.” Johnny said sternly. “I want you to apologize to Miguel right now and invite him to your party.”

“Why?” Robby said angrily. “It’s my party. I decide who I want there.”

“Don’t be rude, okay?” Johnny was getting angry too.

Robby felt trapped. Like there was no way out for him now. He was going to be humiliated either way. He had to do something drastic to get out of this.

“My birthday’s not for weeks.” Robby argued. _What was it that mom always said?_ “I’m sure you’ll be on to your next skank by then.”

Carmen gasped, her hand flying to her mouth. And Johnny’s face went red with anger and embarrassment. But Robby kept his face very still, not letting any guilt or fear show. He’d crossed a line, he knew that. And there would be consequences later. But he had to do it. He was forced to, to save his reputation.

“Robby!” There was warning in Johnny’s voice. “Say you are sorry. Right. Now.” _Or else._

Robby remained stubbornly silent.

“Your mom’s the skank.” Miguel said suddenly. “Your dad said so. She sleeps with a new guy every day.”

“Miguel!” Carmen yelled, but Robby barely heard her.

 _Liar._ Johnny would _never_ say that about his mom. No one would. Robby leapt out of his seat to punch the boy, to pound his face into mush, but Johnny caught him by the collar before he got two feet.

“Hey! That’s enough!” He yelled, pushing Robby back in his seat.

“Maybe we should call this a night.” Carmen said, hurriedly getting up. “C’mon Miguel, we’re going home.”

Miguel gave Robby one last glare before leaving – which was returned in kind. Robby still wanted to beat the kid up, but his dad wouldn’t let him up.

“Carmen! Robby, stay here. Got it?” Johnny said in a voice that Robby did not dare disobey. “Carmen!”

* * *

He caught up to her at the door, just as she was halfway out.

“Carmen, I’m sorry about tonight.” Johnny apologized. “He’ll come around. He is just a kid, okay? Don’t be mad at him.”

“He’s not the one I’m mad at.” Carmen turned on him seething. “You were supposed to talk to him before today.”

Johnny was abashed. “I-I thought - ”

“You thought that you’d just spring me on a nine-year old?” Carmen said, angrily. “How did you see that working out, huh? Honestly – sometimes I wonder who is the real child here.”

Johnny groaned in frustration before heading back in to deal with Robby.

* * *

“You couldn’t be nice for one dinner?” He asked, spreading his arms.

Robby sat there with his arms folded, unapologetic. It wasn’t his fault.

“They shouldn’t have butted in on our night.” He said, sulking. “You said you had some good news for me and they ruined it.”

“Robby – they were what I was talking about.”

“How was that good news?” Robby said, incredulous. “Why would I care about your girlfriend and her kid? Mom never makes me meet her boyfriends.”

For a moment, it looked like Johnny was going to comment on that, but he thought better of it.

“Things are getting serious with Carmen, alright?” Johnny explained. “And Miguel is your age and he’s a great kid. I was hoping you’d get along. That you’d become friends with him. Or maybe even closer. Like brothers.”

“Why would I want to be friends with him?” Robby scoffed. “I got plenty of friends and that guy is a total dork. And…”

Wait – did Johnny just say “like brothers”? Did he just call Miguel a great kid?

Robby felt like someone just pulled the rug from under him. Brother? Like Johnny has another son? His father already didn’t want to spend time with him and now he was getting a new son? Someone he already thought of as a great kid? This Miguel wasn’t just trying to steal his dad, it was like he’d already stolen him.

Robby blinked back the threatening tears. He wouldn’t cry – not in front of his dad. Johnny always said crying made you a pussy and if he cried Johnny would laugh at him too. And then he'd like Miguel better.

“I want to go home.” Robby said, quietly.

Johnny sighed. “Robby - ”

“I want to go home, okay?” Robby said, louder. If his dad didn’t want him around, then he didn’t want to be around him either. “I don’t want to see you anymore. Just take me home.”


	2. Robby II

He hadn’t meant it like that. Not never, never. And sure, he had acted pretty bad. He knew you didn’t say those sort of things to women. He started feeling bad only a few days later and he would’ve apologized to Johnny had he not missed their monthly meeting. He got busy with work, Shannon told him. _Yeah, more like busy with Miguel._

But still, he did apologize when Johnny showed up to hang out with him one afternoon.

“Okay.” Johnny said smiling. “But you need to apologize to Carmen too.”

Robby nodded. He could do that. Carmen wasn’t all bad. Not like that son of hers.

“And you need to invite Miguel to your birthday party.” Johnny added.

_What party? Oh… right. Not this again._

“What’s this?” Shannon asked, raising eyebrows and looking between them. 

“I think Robby here should invite Miguel to the party you are throwing for him.” Johnny said firmly, looking at Robby all the time. “Isn’t that right, Shannon?”

Shannon was looking at Robby quizzically and Robby begged her with his eyes. _Don’t give it away. Please. He’ll tell them and I’ll be humiliated. Please just play along._

“I think that’s up to Robby.” Shannon said, smirking at Johnny.

Johnny sighed, turning back to his son. “Well?”

“I don’t want to see that guy on my birthday.” Robby said firmly. That was technically true.

“Robby, either you invite him or I’m not coming to your party either.” Johnny threatened, certain that his trump card would work.

Robby stared at him. _You care about him that much? You care about **him** that much? That you won’t hang out with **me** if I don’t hang out with **him**? He never invited me to shit – but you still hang out with him, don’t you?_

“Well, I never invited you either!” Robby spat back, angrily. “I already told you it was going to be a loser-free zone. Didn’t you get the message?”

He hurt him. He hurt his father. He could see that in his face. _Good. That’ll teach him to care about someone else more than me._

“So what was that about?” Shannon asked him after Johnny left. “You really want a birthday party?”

Robby could hear the guilt in her voice and he didn’t want that. He didn’t want to make her feel bad. She was the only one who still cared about him after all.

“They were just talking about doing something on my birthday. But I want to spend the day with you.” Robby shrugged. “So I made it up to get them off my back.”

“You are such a sweet boy.” Shannon said, hugging him and Robby immediately felt better. Let Johnny waste his time with Miguel. Robby had his mom and that’s all he needed.

* * *

He really must have pissed Johnny off, though. Because in the end, Johnny didn’t show up for his birthday after all. He just had a 30-second call where Johnny wished him and then hung up. Mom got him a brand new skateboard that he absolutely loved, but he only got a packet of cash from his dad, which Shannon said he’d get in installments, in addition to his allowance.

The good thing was, he didn’t have to see Miguel again for a while. His dad decided to do more fun stuff with him after that. Instead of hanging out at their home, they were always going out for things.

But it couldn’t last forever. Johnny told him one day that Miguel would be hanging out with them the next time and Robby would just have to deal with it. And he better be on his best behavior all day or else…

“Shotgun, sucker!” Miguel laughed from the front seat as soon as Johnny came to pick Robby up.

Robby fumed as Johnny laughed at that. _What was so funny?_ He shoved his skateboard on the backseat – he always carried it everywhere nowadays – before getting in himself.

“So, where do you wanna go, Robby?” Johnny asked, looking at him through the rear-view mirror.

“Oh, we can go to the mall.” Miguel said, excitedly. “My friend told me that they got a new - ”

“We went to the mall last week.” Johnny interrupted him.

Robby frowned. Last week? So Johnny already spent time with Miguel last week? So why did he have to do it again this week?

“C’mon – you said we could do what I wanted.” Miguel argued.

“We will.” Johnny replied. “We are doing your thing later, remember? The meteor shower? We’ll do Robby’s thing now.”

“Okay. That’s fair.” Miguel agreed.

How was that fair? Johnny already did Miguel’s thing last week and now they were doing it today too. Didn’t that mean Miguel was ahead. They should be doing Robby’s thing all day today.

“I wanna go to the skate-park.” Robby said.

“Dude, I don’t know how to skate.” Miguel said, uncertainly.

“Who asked you to?” Robby replied. “I wanna go to the skate-park.”

That was a brilliant idea and Robby was proud to have thought of it. Miguel could yap-yap-yap, but he couldn’t actually do shit. And Robby? He was great at skateboarding. No, not just great – he was awesome. He floated with his board under him almost like he was flying. And the way he hung there, mid-air, right in the moment between rising and falling – he knew it was a thing of beauty to behold. Even other guys at the park often stopped to watch him.

It almost made the ride over worth it. Miguel just kept talking, non-stop and soaked up all of Johnny’s attention. He made jokes – passed comments on Robby – which made Johnny chuckle and Robby fume. How was that fair? Robby had to be on his best behavior but Miguel could talk about him like that? But it wouldn’t matter once they got to the park. All that talking wouldn’t matter then. Once Johnny saw him - saw how awesome he was – he’d have eyes for nothing else.

* * *

That was the plan, atleast.

Robby was totally off his game that day from the start. From the moment he got on his skateboard and looked back to make sure his dad was watching – and then landed on his ass immediately. That drew a snort of laughter from Miguel and even his dad looked amused. He went slower after that. More tentative. He couldn’t afford to look like an idiot here. And he kept looking over to see if Johnny was watching.

Ofcourse, Miguel just couldn’t let anyone else be the center of attention for one moment. Robby could see him constantly talking as he did his basic drills. Then Miguel started to do something weird – like punching and kicking air?

Was he trying to get Johnny’s attention by doing karate? _What a dumbass._ Ofcourse, Robby knew that his dad used to be a karate champion – before that thing with that asshole LaRusso. But Johnny didn’t do karate anymore. Robby had asked him, years ago, to teach him and Johnny had clearly told him that the karate part of his life was over. Miguel was getting desperate here and he was doomed to fail.

Robby almost laughed and that made him fall down again. He jumped back up just as quickly, brushing himself off and hoping Johnny hadn’t noticed. He had – and he looked at Robby sympathetically before focusing his attention back on Miguel and his awkward, puppety moves.

_I’m being pretty desperate myself,_ Robby thought. That was the one thing his dad had taught him. If you wanted someone’s attention, you needed to act cool. Like you didn’t care. Looking over at Johnny repeatedly was breaking his concentration. He needed to focus on the board under him.

Especially if he was going to get this next one right.

The Handplant was a tough one and he hadn’t practiced it enough yet. But he could do it. If he put his mind to it, he knew he could. And even if he couldn’t, he knew that even the attempt would look badass. No way Johnny would not be impressed by that.

Robby made his way to the top of the concrete half-pipe, resisting the urge to look back at his father. He crouched and leaned forward, gathering speed in his downward roll until the world sped by him and he was one with his board. He saw the ramp edge approach on his upward swing.

_This is it._ He contorted his body, bending sideways to catch it – and missed. The board slipped out from under his feet and dropped back, landing on his outstretched arm with a grunt and then on his back, before sliding into the pit. He felt a white-hot flash of pain for a moment, radiating from his forearm and into his whole body. He laid there in the pit, hidden from sight, trying to catch his breath.

Robby tried getting up, accidentally putting his weight on the wrong hand and almost screamed in pain.

_It’s okay, it’s okay._ He told himself, quickly wiping off his tears before they could fall. The pain only shot up when he put weight on it - it just throbbed a little otherwise. The blood was rushing to his head and his heart was pounding with a sick thud-thud-thud and it was making him feel a little dizzy. It made his arm feel a little numb. And it didn’t look bad at all. It looked normal. Probably just as sprain, if that. _Dad doesn’t need to worry and…_

_Where is dad?_

Robby looked around. No one had come running to him, asking him if he was okay, telling him to show them his hand. No one could see him lying there in the pit. He had been sitting there for what felt like an eternity - someone should've noticed that he wasn't skating anymore, right? Robby got up, grabbing his skateboard and climbing out.

Johnny was still there, sitting on the bench, intently watching Miguel try some high kicks.

_He didn’t see me fall. He wasn’t even looking._

Robby didn’t know whether to be happy about that or upset. On one hand, his dad didn’t see him make a fool of himself. On the other hand, he almost had it, but if Johnny wasn’t watching, it meant that even the attempt was pointless, right?

“Hey, you done for the day?” Johnny asked, smiling as Robby came back with his skateboard.

“Yeah.” Robby replied sullenly, pushing his aching hand in the front pocket of his sweatshirt. The fabric supporting it made it hurt a little less than letting it hang at his side.

“Don’t feel bad, okay.” Johnny said comfortingly. “I’m sure you’ll get better in no time.”

Robby bit his tongue. _I AM better – I’m really good. I’m just having a bad day today._ But he didn’t want to say anything in case he was asked to prove it. And he didn’t think he could now – not with his arm hurting like that.

“How about you let Miguel take a turn?” Johnny asked. “He’s a fast learner. Maybe you can show him a few tricks?”

Robby stared dumbfounded as Johnny took the skateboard from his hand and gave it to Miguel. Miguel grinned and put it on the ground, tentatively pushing it with one foot.

“So how are you supposed to do this?” Miguel asked, pushing at it with one foot.

_No, you don’t get to have this. You are already taking my dad, you don’t get to have skateboarding too. It’s not even your board. My mom gave it to me._

“First rule: you don’t touch another guy’s board.” Robby snapped, bending down to grab his board and snatching it back. “If you are serious about learning, get your own.”

“Oh…” Miguel looked embarrassed and Johnny frowned, but said nothing.

* * *

Miguel called shotgun again when they got to the car and Robby didn’t mind this time. He didn’t want to draw attention to his failure anyway.

It wasn’t easy, though. Pain shot through his arm every time the car jolted over a pothole or braked suddenly, even with his arm secure inside his front pocket. Johnny didn’t notice, thankfully. Miguel had started running his mouth again as soon as they got in and Johnny was too focused on that.

_It’s a sprain. It’s just a sprain. It’ll be fine in a bit._

It didn’t get better though. Once the rush of blood was over, it started hurting worse. Robby almost cried once, but he controlled himself. He knew how that would go. Johnny would call him a pussy for crying over a boo-boo and Miguel would laugh and call him a pussy too. He surreptitiously took a look at his arm again – _See? Nothing really wrong. Just a faint, bluish line._

They picked up some food from the drive-through before heading to the beach to watch the meteor shower. Miguel’s thing, right? The guy couldn’t stop talking about stars and constellations and differences between meteors and comets.

“Can you drop me off home instead?” Robby asked as they got there. “I’m tired.”

“C’mon, it’ll be fun.” Johnny told him. “We can relax. Its just sitting on the beach and looking up at the sky.”

“My arm hurts.” Robby said, plaintively.

“My arm hurts.” Miguel said, mockingly. “Don’t be such a baby.”

“Robby, we did your thing.” Johnny said, looking at him sternly. “Now it’s Miguel’s turn. Fair is fair, alright?”

_No, it’s not fair. You didn’t even watch me. You were too focused on Miguel the whole time._ But he knew that he’d only embarrass himself by arguing further and he didn’t want to be called whiny again. So he pointedly kept his hand in his pocket, challenging Johnny to ask, but Johnny just shook his head in frustration and ignored him.

They went to the beach, sitting down near the pavement, watching the sun go down and the stars come out. Any other time, it’d have been the perfect evening, but Robby was too miserable to enjoy it. The pain did subside after a while, going down to a dull throb – but Robby still deliberately kept his hand inside his pocket, doing everything one-handed.

“You know, you’ll have to take that hand out some time.” Johnny smiled down at him when he dropped his burger on the sand.

Robby glared back at him and said nothing. He wasn’t that hungry anyway and the fries were enough. Johnny just sighed and went back to listening to Miguel ramble on about astronomy.

Carmen joined them at some point, greeting Miguel with a hug and Johnny with a kiss. Robby got a smile and nod which he kind of returned.

“Robby, are you okay?” Carmen asked, noticing the pinched look on his face.

“His arm hurts.” Miguel said in a sing-song voice. “He’s been a cranky baby all day.” 

Johnny looked at Robby, waiting for him to answer with a half-smile on his face. _They won’t believe me. Even if I tell them, they’d just say I am faking it. It looks normal, even though it hurts like hell and they’ll just say I am making a big deal out of nothing._

“He’s fine.” Johnny said, smiling when Robby didn’t reply. “He fell on his butt while skate-boarding but he’s a tough kid. Right Robby?”

“I’m fine.” Robby gritted out and turned back to the sky.

* * *

“How did it go today?” Carmen whispered to Johnny.

“Well, they didn’t try to kill each-other.” Johnny replied, smiling. “So I’m counting that as a win.”

* * *

In the end, the meteor shower was pretty disappointing. Not much of a shower, actually. Just some faint streaks in the sky every now and then. Miguel acted like it was the coolest thing ever, but even Johnny couldn’t hide his disappointment this time.

“Wait, that’s it?” He said, squinting up. “I mean – yeah, that was cool.”

That made Robby feel a little bit better. Atleast now Johnny would know better the next time Miguel suggested some “thing”.

Miguel left with his mom and Johnny decided to drop Robby off for the night by himself.

“So, today was pretty awesome, right?” Johnny said, grinning.

Robby huffed, annoyed. There had been nothing awesome about this day. In fact, it hadn’t even been good.

“How do you feel about Miguel now?” Johnny asked, hopefully.

“He’s an asshole.” Robby replied immediately. “He kept making fun of me and you didn’t say anything to him.”

Johnny looked guilty at that.

“Sorry.” He said. “That was kind of my fault.”

“You told him to make fun of me?” Robby asked, hurt.

“No, it wasn’t like that.” Johnny said. “He just – he didn’t know how to act around you, so I gave him some bad advice, I guess. I told him that guys teased each-other, made fun of each-other. Like brothers.”

“He’s not my brother.” Robby replied.

“He could be.” Johnny tried again. “How about you guys try skate-boarding together next time? I could get him a board and you could do it together. Bet you could teach him some stuff. And he could help you practice so you get better too.”

Robby glared at him. _Get **him** a board? You never bought **me** a board in my life._

“He’ll break that boney ass of his on day one.” Robby snapped.

Johnny gave up after that and they rode the rest of the way in sullen silence.

* * *

“How did it go?” Shannon asked when they came back. “Robby, you okay?”

She must have noticed something, but Robby wouldn’t show weakness in front of Johnny. He didn’t want to be called a baby again. Maybe he’d ask his mom for some spray later.

“I’m fine.” He said sullenly, still ignoring the throbbing.

“What’s wrong with your arm?” Shannon asked, looking at the odd way he was holding it.

“It’s fine.” Johnny said annoyed. “He thinks he is proving a point, but he’s just being a pain.”

Shannon ignored him and pulled Robby’s arm out of his pocket. He couldn’t keep in a cry of pain as she pulled his sleeve up.

Okay – it did NOT look like that before. It’d looked normal. Now it was all red and purple and swollen. In a really, really scary way. Robby’s eyes widened as he looked down at it.

“What the hell?” Shannon asked, looking down in shock.

“It’s just a sprain.” Robby said numbly. “Just a sprain.”

It didn’t look like Shannon heard him. “What the hell happened, Johnny?”

Johnny didn’t answer. He just stared down, blinking, mouth opening and closing like a goldfish.

“I fell off the skateboard.” Robby said. “No big deal.”

“Robby, that was hours ago.” Johnny said, finally. “Why didn’t you say something?”

“I told you my arm hurt.” Robby replied, reproachfully.

“I didn’t…” Johnny looked stricken. “I thought you were faking it.”

“DOES IT LOOK LIKE HE’S FUCKING FAKING IT??” Shannon screamed.

“It wasn’t that bad.” Johnny murmured. “It didn’t look that bad. He got right back up. Dusted himself off went right back at it.”

“I fell again after.” Robby said, suddenly feeling ashamed. “You didn’t see that one.”

Shannon glared at Johnny, seething with rage. “You weren’t paying attention?” She didn’t wait for an answer and turned to Robby. “C’mon, we are going to the hospital right now.”

“It’s fine - ” Robby started, but Shannon was already getting her purse.

“Let’s go!” She said in a voice that brooked no argument.

“I’ll drive.” Johnny offered numbly.

“I think you’ve done more than enough for today.” Shannon spat at him venomously.

The car ride to the hospital was worse. His arm had started hurting again after his mom had pulled it out like that and the next jolt in the car sent Robby over the edge. It even looked a lot scarier now. Robby started crying, thankful that atleast Johnny wasn’t there to see it. He knew atleast his mom wouldn’t call him a pussy.

“It’s okay, honey. We are almost there.” She murmured rubbing his shoulder. “I’m gonna KILL that asshole for this!”

* * *

Johnny found Shannon in hospital lobby, angrily filling out the forms.

“How bad is it?” He asked with trepidation.

“What do you think? It’s broken, alright.” Shannon snapped. “They are getting it X-rayed to see how bad.”

Johnny squeezed his eyes shut, trying to hold it together.

“I’m sorry.” He said, his voice breaking. “I’ll pay for everything - ”

“Goddamn right, you will.” Shannon turned on him angrily. “What? You think that’s gonna make it okay?”

Johnny took a deep breath.

“It was an accident, okay?” He pleaded. “These things happen.”

“Are you fucking serious right now?” Shannon spat at him. “Bad enough that you weren’t paying attention when he fell, but then you made him walk around for hours with a broken arm? Because you were too busy paying attention to some other kid? Real good job there. A-plus parenting.”

“He didn’t tell me - ”

“He told you that his arm hurt.” Shannon snapped. “You wanted him to give you an X-ray? Well you can see that in a few minutes.”

Johnny slumped down in the chair, his face in his hands.

“You are right. I’m sorry.” He muttered. “I’ll apologize to Robby too.”

“You are insane if you think I’m letting you anywhere near him after this.” Shannon shook her head incredulously.

Johnny stared at her, stupefied. “You can’t…”

“You wanna take this to a judge?” She challenged. “Let’s see whose side he takes.”

Johnny took another calming breath. Shannon had every right to be pissed off here, but he couldn’t let it make things worse.

“I screwed up. Bad. I know that.” He admitted. “But don’t punish Robby for that. He wants to spend time with me – you know that.”

“Screw you, Johnny” Shannon snapped at him. “You barely give him the time of day, you treat him like shit when you are around and now this – you don’t get to act like a caring dad here.”

Johnny flinched, but persisted.

“I know. And I know I deserve this. But think about what Robby would want.”

Shannon glowered at him, fuming, but she didn’t say no.

“No more alone time. You got it? I’m not trusting you with him anymore.” She said. “From now on, when you want to spend time with him, you do it with me there.”

Johnny nodded. He could work with that. It wasn’t ideal, spending time with Shannon, but he had to earn the trust back. There wouldn’t be any more play-dates with Miguel for a while – but that could wait. He needed to make this right first.

* * *

It didn’t last long – that guilt that drove Johnny to be around more. He started coming over every week, while Robby’s arm was still in the cast. And he put up with Shannon’s acerbic comments and snide remarks, focusing on Robby instead. And for a while, things were good. Better than usual.

But no sooner than the cast of was off that they started going back to normal. Shannon was adamant about not leaving them alone and there was only so much of her that Johnny could take. He started coming over less and less until they were back to once a month. And then those started fading too.

Robby knew it was over when his dad didn’t come over for his eleventh birthday. He didn’t even call. He didn’t know it right away and he didn’t stop fighting, but later on, that would be the moment he’d point to as the beginning of the end.

Sure, Johnny came over two days later – arms full of presents and apologizing profusely. It was a rough time for Carmen, he said. Her mom was sick and they’d gotten into a fight and Miguel had gotten into trouble at school. But ofcourse he was sorry and he’d do anything to make up for it.

Robby just stared at him blankly. It didn’t mean anything – all those sorrys and all those presents. What it came down to was that Johnny had been more focused on his other family and forgotten all about him.

Robby turned away without a word and went inside, closing the door behind him. He let his mother handle the yelling part.


	3. Robby III

Finding out about his dad’s new job was a complete accident. Or maybe it was an old job? Robby couldn’t be sure. Johnny had changed jobs so many times that Robby had just stopped asking what he did for money years ago.

This one, he found out about accidentally. He was at his locker at school when he overheard the words.

“My brother acts like being a Cobra Kai is the shit, but it’s just karate, right?” Alice said to Jane.

“Did you say Cobra Kai?” Robby turned to the girls he only knew in passing. He’d heard that phrase before. That used to be… his dad’s old dojo, right? But that was years ago.

“Yeah, it’s this karate class in Reseda.” Alice told him. “You heard of it?”

He had, but… “That closed down years ago.” Robby said confidently.

“No, it’s still going. And I thought it was new.” Alice said, confused. “Didn’t you see the fliers?”

_Fliers? On the notice board? Who looked at that anymore?_

But there is was – an ad for Cobra Kai under Sensei Lawrence. With a picture of his dad throwing a punch. Johnny was back into karate. He’d opened a dojo and… he hadn’t even bothered to tell Robby.

Robby shuffled his feet on the pavement, trying to avoid eye-contact with the crazy-looking lady going through the dumpsters. He’d gotten there easily enough – he was old enough to get around by himself. But he realized that he didn’t actually have a plan.

He just had so many questions. When did his dad start doing karate again? How did this work? Why hadn’t he told him? Could Robby join if he wanted to?

He got a partial answer when he peeked in through the window and saw rows of guys practicing their punches and kicks. Older guys. Bigger guys. Definitely in high-school or above. He thought that maybe he even saw an old, fat man in their midst.

That must be why Johnny never invited him. It was a karate class for older guys. He was pretty sure Alice’s brother was in high-school too. Johnny was probably waiting until Robby got bigger. Unless…

This could be it, right? A way to spend more time with his dad – and away from that Miguel. Johnny could make an exception for him, let him join the class even if he ended up being the smallest one there. And he’d love to learn how to fight. He got into plenty of fights already – whenever someone made fun of his clothes or his hair or called him an asshole. He won some, lost others – but mostly, he just ended up being dragged to the principal’s office by a teacher. But if he could convince his dad to teach him…

Let’s see Miguel try and compete with that. This could be a way for him to get it all back. Spend more time with his father, make him proud of him and with no Miguel around to suck up all the attention… yes, this could work.

Robby waited until the class was over and everyone had left before going in.

“Robby, what are you doing here?” Johnny asked when he saw him. “Does your mom know you are here?”

“No – I was just in the neighborhood.” Robby shrugged. “Thought I’d check this place out.”

Johnny smiled. He looked happy – really happy. And that made Robby smile too. This was working.

“So what do you think?” Johnny asked.

“Thought it’d be bigger.” Robby smirked.

Johnny laughed at that. “Yeah, just give it time.”

“So… is there like an age limit or something to join?” Robby asked. The hint was good enough, right?

Johnny looked excited for a moment, but then his face changed.

“I’m not sure this is right for you, Robby.” Johnny said, regretfully. “I don’t think your mom would like that.”

Excuses. Right. He’d expected those. He was already coming up with counterarguments. He’d convince his mom. He already knew how to fight. Sure he was small but he was growing up fast. He could anticipate it all and he’d find a way to convince Johnny.

What he didn’t anticipate was the voice behind him.

“Sensei, school was a total shitshow today.” Miguel said, coming in. “And Hawk – Oh?... Hey Robby.”

Robby felt his heart drop into his stomach. Miguel – in a Cobra Kai gi. He’d already gotten here first. No – Johnny had let him in first. He hadn’t even told Robby about the dojo but he was already teaching Miguel since… _since when?_

Suddenly, Robby remembered that day at the skate park – Miguel practicing his kicks and Johnny watching him intently. That was like a year ago. How long had this been going on?

“Robby here is just checking out the dojo.” Johnny said, smiling and stepping behind him. “You wanna stick around? Watch a class? Maybe even try it? First lesson is free.”

Did he want to stick around? Watch Johnny pay even more attention to Miguel? No – no he did not. He’d lost this fight before he even knew about it, but he didn’t need his face rubbed in it.

“N-no.” Robby stuttered. “I think I should get back home.”

“Hold up. I’ll drop you off.” Johnny said.

“Sensei, we’ve got a class in half an hour.” Miguel objected.

“I’ll be back.” Johnny assured him. “Hold down the fort until then, okay? Start them off with warm-ups and stretches until I get back.”

Miguel nodded and smiled, giving Robby a small wave as he walked out with Johnny. But Robby was too dazed to return it.

_Why him? M_ ore importantly, _Why not me?_

Robby got that Johnny liked Miguel better. He hated it with every fiber of his being, but he got it. But this wasn’t about choosing between them. Johnny could’ve taught them both. Sure, Robby would’ve hated having Miguel there, but if it meant spending time with Johnny, he’d have swallowed it somehow.

Even if there was some bullshit excuse like his mom not letting him, he could’ve still talked to him. Made the offer. Robby would’ve figured out a way to convince his mother. Instead he just spent all this time with Miguel and… and even trusted him to lead the class?

There was only one explanation for this – Johnny didn’t want him there. It wasn’t about preferring Miguel anymore. He just didn’t like Robby. He spent time with him because that’s what dads were supposed to do but he didn’t want to spend any more time with him than he absolutely had to. And not even that much. That’s why Robby hadn’t seen him in months. He’d blamed his mom for always hovering around, but that hadn’t been fair. Johnny just hadn’t wanted to.

“So? Think you want to be a Cobra?” Johnny asked, smiling, as if he hadn’t just destroyed Robby’s whole world.

“Not sure. It’s up to mom, right?” Robby replied quietly.

_Don’t do it. Don’t let him see your tears. Don’t give him the satisfaction._

* * *

“Not a chance in hell.” Shannon said curtly.

“It’s not like before.” Johnny said. “You told me before he wouldn’t be interested, so I let it go. But he is interested now. He came to the dojo.”

“I don’t care.” Shannon replied. “You are not teaching him karate. He gets into enough fights already. And I don’t want him to turn out like you.”

Johnny kept his temper in check. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means I don’t want my son to be a loser at 50.” She told him. “I don’t want him to get into fights all the time. That’s how we first met, remember? With you getting in a bar fight.”

“I thought that’s why you were into me.” Johnny said, sarcastically.

“Yeah, it was.” Shannon agreed. “I didn’t know what a mess you’d turn out to be back then.”

Johnny sighed. This was going nowhere.

“Look, the kid came to me, okay?” He tried a different angle. “That has to mean something.”

“It means he misses his dad.” Shannon replied.

“Then let him spend more time with me.”

“Sure.” Shannon agreed. “You can come over whenever you like.”

_With you there? With us fighting in front of him constantly? No thanks._

But there was something - a suggestion Carmen had made. It was underhanded, but it was worth a shot.

“Or he could sleep over at my place every now and then.” Johnny suggested. Shannon opened her mouth to argue, but he rolled over her. “Listen, you deserve a life too. You need a break every now and then. So… if Robby stays over at my place, you can stay out all night. Or have someone over.”

That was total bullshit and they both knew it. Johnny already knew that Shannon often left Robby alone for the night. And he knew that she never had any problem bringing guys over. But she’d never admit it – especially not to him. So this… it’d be a chance for her to do what she wanted while not having to feel guilty about it.

“You think I’d do that?” She said, scornfully. “Dump my kid so I can go party?”

_You do that already._

“No, ofcourse not.” Johnny said congenially. “Look, all I’m saying is that if it ever gets too much and you need a night off, don’t feel like you can’t drop Robby off at my place for the night. Raising a kid alone isn’t easy and you deserve a break too sometimes. And Carmen would be there – she’s a good mother. She’ll make sure I don’t screw up again.”

Shannon narrowed her eyes at him, her fingers tapping the counter, considering.

“Okay.” She said finally. “I’ll think about it.”

_A quarter victory at best. But I’ll take it._

* * *

So maybe Robby was wrong. Maybe his dad did care about him. He wouldn’t have asked for the sleepover after all this time if he didn’t, right? And Mom said that he asked for it. That he wanted it. Even though Robby told her that he didn’t really want to go, that he’d be fine home alone like he’d been a thousand times before, she assured him that Johnny had asked for it. Why would he do that if he didn’t care?

Unless it was out of guilt. Like those presents he’d brought. He hadn’t cared enough to actually remember Robby’s birthday, but he’d felt guilty about not caring and tried to make up for that with gifts.

But then, would you feel guilty about not caring if you didn’t care in the first place? Too complicated. It made Robby’s head hurt, trying to figure it out.

Maybe there was no simple answer here. Maybe it was like… something. Like he didn’t always care, but he cared sometimes. And when he did care, he still didn't care enough. But he cared somewhat. It obviously wasn’t like with Carmen and Miguel. Johnny obviously cared about them ALL the time. 

But maybe even sometimes-caring wouldn’t be so bad. Better than sitting home alone and waiting for him mom to come back.

So he decided to behave this time. Mind his manners and be polite and not say anything stupid or nasty. And he did that – even though a lot of things pissed him off that evening.

Like finding out that Johnny had moved. Before, Robby had atleast comforted himself with the fact that he could’ve found Johnny anytime he wanted to. But that was a lie. Johnny had moved in with Carmen to a one-storey, 3-bedroom house in a completely new location. It wasn’t a mansion or anything, but it was bigger than his old place. And Robby hadn't known. His bedroom at Johnny's place - the one he hadn't used for ages - was gone without him even knowing and he had no idea what became of the stuff he'd left there. Probably in trash already. 

Or finding out that he’d be sleeping on a cot in Miguel’s room, which did not look very comfortable. He’d told them that he’d rather take the couch – that he often slept on the couch at home anyway, waiting up for mom to come home – but they wouldn’t hear of it. And he definitely did not like the look Carmen had given him on that.

Or seeing that ring on Carmen’s finger. He sure knew what that meant. And he knew all the talk about flowers and dishes and cakes wasn’t for some random party.

Or when he met Miguel’s grandma. The guy already had a mom and a grandmother hanging on to his every word – did he need Johnny too?

But the worst was hearing Miguel call Johnny “dad”. And Johnny not correcting him. That was the final nail in coffin. He had no chance now. Maybe he never did. They were almost officially father and son and Johnny would only grow to care about the other boy more and more. Which meant he’d never need Robby again.

Still, he managed to get through the dinner somehow and decided that it was going to be the first and the last time. It didn’t matter that Johnny sometimes-cared – Robby hadn’t liked the way he had felt all evening and he had no intention of feeling like that again. He’d get through this with dignity and then he’d never see Johnny again.

He’d rather have gone to sleep right away, but Miguel wanted to talk. It was like the guy never ran out of things to say. And… if Robby didn’t hate his guts already, he probably would’ve enjoyed it a lot more.

He was fine with it when Miguel talked about school and comics and cartoons, but despite himself, Robby felt his temper rise when Miguel brought up Cobra Kai.

“You should totally join.” Miguel said. “It’s like a class on how to be badass. And dad is the badass-est of them all.”

“Why do you call him dad?” Robby asked, frowning.

“He asked me to.” Miguel shrugged. “I used to call him Sensei, but now that he and mom are getting married…”

“I mean, what about your real dad?” Robby had never thought to ask before. “Where is he?”

“Back in Ecuador, I guess.” Miguel replied. “I never knew my real dad, so it’s like I didn’t have one.”

_So you decided to take mine?_

“Doesn’t matter.” Miguel said flippantly. “Dad’s my dad now.”

So close. Robby had been so close making it through the night. But now he just couldn’t help himself.

“So your mom doesn’t even know who your dad is?” Robby said snidely, the implication clear in his voice. “Guess that’s something.”

Robby never even saw the punch coming. He just felt a blinding pain on the side of his face and saw stars as the world slid sideways and he was on the floor. He cried out when he felt a weight land on his back. A hand grabbed him by the hair and slammed his head against the floor, making everything go black for a moment. And it all came rushing back as a knee slammed painfully into his side.

Robby screamed, panicking, flailing his arms trying to hit something. Miguel grabbed his hand and twisted it behind his back, before punching his face again with his other hand. Robby raised his hand to his head to protect it, leaving his side vulnerable. Miguel punched him, again and again, boney knuckles digging deep into his flesh as he shouted something unintelligible at Robby.

“MIGUEL!” Johnny yelled from the doorway before rushing forward. “Get off him!”

Johnny grabbed Miguel by the scruff of his neck and dragged him off Robby. Robby curled up on his side, crying and holding his side. He heard Carmen gasp from the door before she rushed over to him, pulling him in her arms.

“What the hell were you doing?” Johnny asked angrily, holding Miguel by his shoulders.

“What you taught me.” Miguel replied furiously, still glaring at Robby.

“I didn’t teach you beat up someone weaker than you.” Johnny said.

Miguel looked at him angrily for a moment before turning back to Robby.

“Strike first, Strike hard, No Mercy.” He said deliberately. “Says nothing about anyone being weak. If he talks shit about my mom again, he has got another ass-kicking coming to him.”

Robby looked at Johnny through tears. He couldn’t make out what his dad’s face looked like, but he knew his own was pleading. _Say something, please. Tell him it doesn’t matter what I said. That I’m your son and nobody hurts me no matter what. Doesn’t matter if you don’t mean it, just say it for once. Please._

Johnny didn’t say anything.

“What’s wrong with you?” Carmen said angrily. “You don’t do that to people, Miguel.”

“But he said - ” Miguel started.

“I don’t care what he said. _Estas loco?_ ” Carmen shouted. “You don’t hit people. Get out of here.”

“It’s my room.” Miguel said, angrily.

“Not tonight.” Carmen said, before turning back to Robby.

Johnny came to him too. “Hey, c’mon. Let me have a look.” He said, lifting Robby’s chin.

Robby shrank back, trying to stop himself from crying, but Johnny held him in place, examining. Everything hurt like hell, but he didn't want them to call him a pussy. 

Then they all heard a loud “CRACK!” and turned towards the door. Miguel was still standing there, looking furious and glaring at Robby with the skateboard under his foot, broken cleanly in the middle.

_No… My mom gave that to me._

“OUT!!” Carmen yelled, swirling around and marching to him. She grabbed him by the ear, dragging him out the door before slamming it behind her. Robby could hear her yelling at him in Spanish but couldn’t make out the words.

“How bad does it hurt?” Johnny asked, gently pressing at his cheek.

Robby winced.

“Right. We are going to the hospital.” Johnny said.

_Ofcourse. He doesn’t actually care. He just feels guilty. For that time with the skateboard. My skateboard._

Robby wiped away his tears and gingerly got up, picking up his back-pack from the corner. He could probably fit the skateboard in too now. It was broken and useless but he didn’t want to leave it here.

“It’s okay, you can leave that here.” Johnny said. “It’ll still be here when we get back. And we’ll get you a new skateboard too. A better one. The latest model.”

Robby shook his head slowly. No – he wouldn’t accept anything from Johnny. Never again. His dad didn’t care about him? Fine. Then he deserved to feel guilty. Robby wasn’t going to let him feel better by doing some bullshit that didn’t matter.

“No.” He said firmly. “I don’t want a new skateboard. I want this one.”

“Robby - ”

“And I’m not coming back here.” He said, turning to him. “Ever again. You can drop me back home after hospital.”

“Robby, it’s okay.” Johnny tried to comfort him. “You don’t have to be scared of Miguel.”

“I’m not.” He was. “I just don’t want to be here with you.”

“Your mom’s not home right now.” Johnny sighed.

“I don’t care.” Robby replied. “I’ve stayed the night alone before. I can do it again.”

“Robby - ”

“Either you drop me home or I’ll tell people that you hit me.” Robby said, staring daggers at his father.

Johnny’s mouth fell open as he stared at him. _It’s true, right? Kind of? Miguel beat me up, sure, but you taught him how._

Robby knew he won the contest of wills when Johnny looked away.

“Alright.” He said. “I’ll take you home after. But I’m staying with you tonight.”

“Then make it count.” Robby said spitefully. “Because this will be the last night you get with me.”

Robby held on to it – that feeling of anger and betrayal and heartbreak. He held on to it when Johnny knocked on his bedroom door, asking him to go shopping for a new skateboard and he steadfastly ignored him. He held on to it whenever Johnny called to talk to him and he refused – until the calls stopped coming altogether. He held on to it when he refused to go to the wedding. Mom got to skip it – why shouldn’t he? And he especially held on to it whenever the urge hit him, that urge to call Johnny and beg for his forgiveness and cry until he got it.

He was done making a fool of himself. He was done craving attention from the guy who clearly never going to give it to him.


	4. Miguel I

_Something’s wrong._

It wasn’t like Miguel was psychic or anything. But he could still feel the tension in the air when he came into the house. The whole place felt unnaturally quiet – no TV running in the background, no sounds of appliances, no one talking on the phone, no cooking sounds in the kitchen. There was always something or the other going on when he came back from school – some sign of the house being a lived-in home. But today, all he heard were hushed whispers from the kitchen.

“He’s thirteen, Carmen.” Miguel heard Johnny say quietly. “Just thirteen years old.”

“I know.” His mom replied in the same subdued voice.

“She just left him.” Miguel could make out the bitterness in his voice. “Told him she’d be gone for a week and went off with some guy she barely knows. That was three weeks ago.”

Miguel peeked in, trying not to make his presence known. He shouldn’t eavesdrop, but he was curious now. And he knew they were talking about something important and upsetting and parents never did that in front of children. He knew that the moment he went in, they’d stop talking and pretend like everything was okay. And it clearly wasn’t – not if Johnny was trying not to cry like that.

This had to be serious, right? But they were talking about some thirteen year old guy? Not Miguel, obviously. Nobody had left him. Someone from Cobra Kai then? Miguel wracked his brain, trying to think which one of his friends might be having family trouble.

“Didn’t even leave him any money and she didn't pay the bills before she left.” Johnny continued. “They cut off power last week. He was just living in the dark, with barely any food… what kind of mother does that?” He sighed. “What kind of father let's it happen?”

“You didn’t know.” Carmen said comfortingly.

Johnny shook his head. “The school called me last week. Told me he hadn’t been to class for a few days. And instead of checking up on him, I just… I told them to call his mother.”

Keene. Ofcourse. This was about him. He was the only reason Johnny ever got this upset. He was the only one who made him that miserable. Miguel had thought that they were rid of him after that incident two years ago. He hadn’t seen him since then and things had been great without him. Sure Dad had moped for a while, but he’d gotten over it. Especially when Robby had refused to come to the wedding. Things were great and now…

Was he back? Was that what was going on here?

“Hey.” Miguel said, announcing himself. “What’s up?”

As expected, things changed immediately. Carmen got up, putting on a big, fake smile and Johnny hastily wiped his eyes before doing same.

“Honey, you’re back.” Carmen said, before giving Johnny a quick glance. “We – uh – wanted to talk to you about something. You remember Robby, right?”

Miguel shrugged. He’d rather forget.

“Well, what do you think about him staying over?” Carmen asked, as if it was up to him.

“After what happened the last time?” Miguel asked, quizzically raising his eyebrow.

“That’s not going to happen again, is it?” Carmen’s smile disappeared and was replaced by a stern look.

Miguel felt a rush of shame at the memory. Sure Keene had had it coming, but both Johnny and Carmen had made sure that Miguel paid for his lack of self-control. He’d never gotten in that much trouble before – or since. The spanking that night had just been the start. Grounded for a month. No karate for two months – until Johnny had convinced his mom to relent with the promise of teaching him better. And all his allowance had to go to buying Robby a new skate-board – which the guy hadn’t even thanked him for.

“His mom is out of town and he needs to stay over for a few nights.” Johnny said.

“Why can’t she just take him with her?” Miguel asked.

Either they thought he was stupid or they didn’t know he’d overheard them. Either way, he didn’t have to make this any easier. If he acted like he was fine with it, they might start inviting him over more often and he could not let that happen. He could put up with Keene for a few days, but he was going to make damn sure that they knew that he was doing it under protest.

“Because she can’t.” Carmen said firmly. “And Robby is staying with us.”

“Don’t I get a say in this?” Miguel argued. “It’s my house too. I thought we voted on things like this.”

“Don’t bother.” A voice said from behind him. “I’m not staying.”

_Crap. Awkward._

This “discussion” was just for a show. They’d already decided. Robby Keene was already there, in their kitchen and… wearing his clothes? Miguel stared at him. He was freshly out of shower and that t-shirt and shorts were obviously Miguel’s. And there was a fresh bruise forming on his jaw.

“Robby’s clothes are in laundry.” Carmen told him when she saw him looking. “So I told him he could borrow some of your clothes for today. That’s okay, right?”

“Sure.” Miguel said. Carmen had that tone which meant that any answer other than total acceptance would’ve been unacceptable. “So what happened to your face?”

“Dumb rent-a-cop couldn’t keep his hands to himself.” Robby replied, shrugging.

Miguel could figure the rest out.

“You were shop-lifting?” He asked, even though he already knew the answer. “And you got caught and dad had to bail you out?”

Robby shrugged again. “I was out of food.”

“So are you in trouble now? Are you going to jail? Is that why you have to stay with us?” _Did people go to jail for shoplifting?_

“No, he’s not going to jail.” Johnny said. “And he’s not in trouble.”

_C’mon, not even a little bit?_ Miguel knew that his mom would tan his ass if he ever got caught shoplifting. How was it fair that Robby got away with it?

“And I’m not staying either.” Robby added. “It’s fine. You can drop me off at Mrs. McClaren.”

“Who the hell is Mrs. McClaren?” Johnny asked.

“The old lady who lives next door.” Robby replied sullenly. “She’s cool. Mom often leaves me with her when she goes out and as long as I don’t interrupt her programs and don’t mess with her cats, she lets me do whatever I want. I can stay with her until mom comes back.”

“Awesome.” Miguel agreed. It did sound awesome – getting to live with no supervision.

“No – not awesome. And not happening.” Johnny said. “Both of you – this is not a discussion. Robby’s staying here. Got it?” He looked between the two of them. “IS THAT CLEAR?”

“Yes, Sensei!” Miguel gave the conditioned response to that voice. Robby just stared sullenly.

“Alright. That’s settled then.” Carmen smiled. “Miguel, you can sleep on the couch tonight.”

“What? Why?”

“We’ll have a bed put in, but I don’t think it’ll come today.” Carmen explained. “So Robby can sleep in your bed tonight and you can take the couch for one night.”

_Oh, C’mon! The guy just walked in and took my clothes, my bed and… wait? Why are they putting in a bed? Is he taking my room too?_

“Why can’t he sleep on the couch?” Miguel asked plaintively.

“Miguel. It’s just one night.” There was a hint of warning in Carmen's voice that told him that another word out of him would mean trouble.

_It’s not fair. You can’t just bring that guy in and…_

“It’s fine. I’ll take the couch.” Robby said flatly. “I’m used to it.”

“Robby, it’s no trouble. Miguel’s fine with it.” Carmen said, looking threateningly as him. “Right Miguel?”

“I said I’ll take the couch.” Robby told her, but his eyes were fixed on Johnny. "I like sleeping on the couch."

Carmen gave him a sad look, but thankfully, she gave up after that. It was just fair, right? Robby was the guest here. Why should Miguel have to give up his room when he didn’t even want him there in the first place? Even Robby could see that it wouldn’t be fair.

“Okay. But we’ll do something fun tonight, right?” Carmen said cheerfully. “It’s Taco night. Those are always great, right?”

That cheered Miguel up. He did like Taco night.

“Don’t really like tacos.” Robby said sullenly.

“Oh.” Carmen’s smile dimmed and then brightened up again. “That’s okay. We’ll do something else. What kind of food do you like, Robby?”

Miguel somehow kept his temper in check. This asshole just walked in and took over everything. And why was his mom bending over backwards to accommodate him?

* * *

“Thanks for doing this.” Johnny said to his wife that night as they got into bed.

“Ofcourse.” Carmen replied.

“It’ll just be for a few days.” Johnny assured her. “I’ll track Shannon down and talk to her. Make sure this doesn’t happen again. And once she comes back…”

Johnny trailed off as he saw Carmen staring at him with wide eyes.

“Robby isn’t going back to her.” She said, stunned. “I thought we were on the same page on that.”

“I don’t…”

“Johnny, I stayed out of it because it was none of my business, but enough is enough.” Carmen said, determined. “She leaves him alone all the time. She brings strange guys over when he is there. She drinks while taking care of him. And now she just left a thirteen year old on his own without power or food for weeks? That woman is not fit to be a mother. Robby is staying here from now on.”

Johnny blinked. “But Shannon has custody.”

“And you’ll take care of that tomorrow.” Carmen replied. “You will get a lawyer first thing in the morning and get this done.”

“Are you sure?” Johnny asked, uncertainly. “Robby doesn’t like either of us very much. And Miguel - ”

“Miguel will learn to live with him.” Carmen said. “And Robby is just a kid. It’s fine if he hates us for a while – we still have to do what’s best for him.”

“You are sure about this?”

“Johnny, what the hell is wrong with you?” She asked incredulously. “You should be the one trying to force me into this. Threatening to walk out if I don’t agree. Not the other way around.”

Johnny smiled, happy and relieved. “I just – I don’t know what I did to deserve you.”

* * *

Robby was an ass. He’d been one to Miguel since the day they met. Pushing him down like that for no reason at all. And then he’d called his mom a skank. Was he just supposed to forget that? Forgive it? Maybe he could have. He certainly tried. But then he’d done it again last time.

Miguel still didn’t fully understand what had gone wrong there. He’d done everything Johnny had taught him. _Man confronts you, he is the enemy. And the enemy deserves no mercy. You have to stand up for yourself. For the people you love. Cowards hide behind their weakness and call you names, but you have to show them that you will not stand for it._ That’s what Miguel had been taught and that’s what he’d done? So why did they punish him for it?

Ofcourse, the lessons had changed after that. Changed a lot. Dad now talked about showing mercy, about using your head, about showing restraint, about taking down the strongest opponent. But they still had to be badass.

Miguel had thought Robby was a badass for a while. The guy had spent the whole day with a broken arm and never said a word. But that was just messed up, right?

Miguel had done what Sensei – Johnny had been Sensei back then – had told him to that day as well. He’d wanted it to go better and he’d asked Sensei how to get along with Robby. And Sensei had told him – little fun things friends did with each-other. Calling shotgun. Calling each-other names. Teasing. And it was true. He called Hawk a pussy and Hawk called him a nerd and they were best friends.

Okay, maybe he wouldn’t have tried that with Robby had Robby just told them that his arm was broken. Who does that? Why would he just keep quiet about it? That was fucked up.

It wasn't because he was some kind of badass because Robby was a pussy. That’s why he didn’t join Cobra Kai. Sure, Johnny said it was because he wasn’t suited, but Miguel knew what that meant as well. He’d seen the kind of guys who weren’t “suited” to Cobra Kai. Soft, weak, cowards who couldn’t take Sensei’s tough talk for more than a day. Those who wanted to be coddled and treated like princesses. That’s what Robby wanted from his “daddy” too and Johnny just wasn’t that kind of guy.

And not coming to the wedding – that had been a real dick move too. Johnny had wanted him there and so had Carmen. In fact, they’d berated Miguel until he’d agreed to apologize and promised to be on his best behavior around the guy. But Robby wouldn’t even talk to him – or any of them, so there was nothing he could’ve done about that. Still, he’d felt so sorry for Johnny – felt bad every time he’d seen him call and then watched his heart break as it went unanswered. 

So yeah, Robby was an asshole, a dick and a pussy. He was all the private parts.

So why was Miguel feeling so bad for him right now?

_It’s because his mom left him. And now he has no one. Imagine how you’d feel your mom left you._

But she hadn’t actually left, right? She was just on a trip for a few weeks. She’d come back and take Robby off their hands again. No need to blubber about it. Carmen had left Miguel too, for a whole week, when she’d gone on that honeymoon with Johnny. Miguel hadn’t acted like his world had ended.

_That’s different and you know it. It was just for one week, you had yaya taking care of you and Mom called you everyday anyway._

Okay, so maybe there was a reason to feel bad for the poor guy. And now Miguel felt guilty about not letting him have his bed. Carmen wasn’t putting Miguel down with that offer, she was just trying to be nice to Robby. And Miguel couldn’t see it until now. He could’ve done that, right? Been nice to the guy for one night?

Sure Robby was an ass, but that didn’t mean Miguel had to be one too.

Miguel got up and tip-toed his way out of his room. Maybe Robby would already be asleep, but if he was awake, Miguel could offer to switch places with him for the night. It was just one night and it was just the couch. He could handle that.

He heard the soft sniffles coming from the couch as he stepped into the living room. Robby was awake and he was… crying? Not bawling like a baby, but those small sobs were unmistakable. The guy walks around with a broken arm all day without even flinching and now he is crying for no reason? How was Miguel supposed to react to that? He didn’t want to embarrass the guy and he knew Robby wouldn’t want any comfort from him. He wouldn’t have wanted any from Robby either. His instincts told him to just back-out quietly but he still wanted to make him the offer.

Miguel stepped forward and the floorboard creaked under his foot. Immediately, the sniffling stopped and they both stayed frozen in the moment.

“What do you want?” Robby asked, quietly, breaking the spell after a while.

“Uh… just thought you might want to take the bed for the night?” Miguel said, trying to look at his face in the darkness.

He could see Robby’s eyes glittering from the streetlights through the windows, but couldn’t make out much more.

“No thanks.” Robby refused flatly.

“Dude, it’s okay.” Miguel tried again, smiling. “You’ll be more comfortable there.”

“Fuck off.” Robby replied.

_Do you have to be such an asshole? C’mon, I’m really trying to be nice here._

“It’ll be okay, Robby.” He said, gently. “Dad will take care of everything.”

“Didn’t you hear me?” Robby said, sounding angrier. “Fuck off before I beat the shit out of you.”

Beat the shit out of _him_? Didn’t the guy remember how it went the last time? Did he want a reminder?

_Alright. Screw nice. If this is what he wants…_

“You are an asshole, you know that?” Miguel said, angry himself. “It’s no wonder your mom left you. Dad can’t stand you either.”

Miguel turned on his heel and walked back to his room, not waiting to see the reaction. It was a cruel thing to say to someone, he knew that. Telling them that their parents didn’t love them – that was crossing a line. But it was true and it was for Robby’s own good. He had had a bad attitude since the day Miguel had met him and until he fixed that, no one would love him.

* * *

It kind of happened overnight – even though it happened over the course of a few weeks.

The bed came next day, with the mattress and sheets and pillows.

Half the closet was cleared out to make room for Robby’s stuff. Even though he didn’t have enough stuff to need that much space.

That was corrected later, when Johnny forced them to go shopping for clothes. Atleast Miguel got a few shirts out of that, but Robby still got a lot more.

Then they had to shift rooms – exchange with yaya. Miguel’s bedroom had been the smallest in the house because he was a kid and didn’t need that much space. Not to mention, his bedroom was right next to mom and dad’s. But with two kids… Miguel felt bad for his grandmother. Why should she have to suffer because of Robby? But she said she didn’t mind at all.

Then a new desk and chair were moved into their new room – better than Miguel’s old one, he noticed with annoyance. That was fine though. Robby would'nt be around for long and then Miguel could use that one.

He couldn’t do anything about the new laptop and phone, however. He’d been asking his mom for a new one for ages but she always said that his old one worked just fine. But somehow, Robby was getting all this brand new stuff and while Miguel was stuck with the old junk.

Nor could he do anything about the news that Robby would be shifting to his school soon as well. And Miguel was supposed to show him around and help him make friends. And that frustrated him too. Was the guy going to take over every part of his life? Why would his parents encourage that?

Miguel realized what it all meant in a single afternoon – after Johnny came back from his weekend trip. He’d gone to find Shannon, he said, and he’d found her. And for a moment, both Miguel and Robby were really happy to be done with each-other.

But it was not to be. Shannon was sick – No, no, not dying. Just some problems that would need her go stay at rehab for a while. Sure Robby could visit her and he might even live with her again after she was all better. But for now, Robby would be staying put. And when he visited her in a few days, Shannon would tell him the same thing.

“He’s never going to leave, is he?” Miguel asked, cold all over, after Robby had left the room with Johnny.

“No. But you are not going to tell him that.” Carmen said firmly. “He’s your stepbrother Miguel and you better get used to having him around.”

“But his mom could get better, right?” Miguel argued. “And she wants him around. Unlike us.”

Carmen glared at him. “Johnny wants him around. And so do I. And you better get on board with it as well.” She told him. “It’s not good for him to just go back and forth like nobody wants him around. So he’s staying here. For good. And you are going to be nice to him about it.”

Miguel sighed. To be honest, it had been something he’d wanted since the day he learned that Johnny had a son. Being an only child, the thought of having a brother his own age had excited him. Playing games with each-other, pulling pranks, doing karate together, getting into trouble, arguing, fighting, then acting like it never happened, talking to each-other late into the night long after they were supposed to be asleep, always having each-other's backs – Miguel had wanted all that. He'd fantasized about it, about how awesome it'd be to have kind of a partner-on-crime.

And then he’d met Robby and started dreaded this day instead. The day Johnny would decide that Miguel alone wasn’t enough and he needed his “real” son around as well. It would’ve been worth it if Johnny’s son had been someone like… Hawk, maybe. Someone nice and friendly and funny and smart with all the same interests. But it was Robby Keene. The guy was sullen and moody and quiet and angry all the time. No way Miguel could get along with someone like that.

The only good thing here was that Johnny hadn’t actually chosen to move Robby in. He didn’t want him around either. He was being forced to do this because Robby’s mom had flaked on him one too many times.

Atleast Miguel could comfort himself with that much. He was Johnny’s “real” son after all, more “real” than Robby. And sure Johnny would have to pay some attention to him too, include him in their time together or take his side every now and then – but he’d just be doing it because he had to. Robby wouldn’t come between them and for that reason, Miguel decided that he would put up with the guy.

Provided that he improved his attitude, ofcourse.

That was the biggest problem here. Both Johnny and Carmen were doing so much for him – treating him like he was royalty – and the asshole just didn’t appreciate it. He acted like _he_ was doing _them_ a favor here by accepting their generosity. 

Like how he refused to sleep in the bed for the first few days because he didn’t want to be in the same room as Miguel. He deliberately slept on the couch just to snub them.

Or like when he said he didn’t want a new phone or a computer. Ofcourse, Miguel offered to take it off his hands and let him have his old one instead and the look of disdain Robby had given him at that told Miguel that he did want it after all. That he had just been faking it. He held out for a few days, but he started using them all the same.

And then there were the chores. Miguel had to do stuff like mowing the lawn and taking out the trash and clean the bathrooms. But Robby got off scot-free. Neither Carmen nor Johnny ever ordered him to do any of that stuff.

Sure he kinda helped out – like with setting the table or clearing the dishes or helping Yaya shop for groceries or making his own bed. Once, Miguel even found him helping Carmen with the cooking when he got home from karate. But that didn’t count. He was only doing it out of habit – he didn’t even notice he was doing it. And that wasn’t the point of chores. They were supposed to make you miserable, so that you could build character. If you wanted to do them, then they weren’t chores.

So all in all, Robby would need to improve his attitude and lot and it was clear that neither Johnny nor Carmen was going to make him do it. They’d let him get away with murder. So it was up to Miguel then, right? He couldn’t let him keep disrespecting and taking advantage of his parents.

He just needed to make sure that he did it the right way this time. 


	5. Miguel II

Miguel kept his temper in check for as long as he could. He knew that one wrong move and he'd be the one blamed fro lack of self-control. He reached his breaking point one day when Robby almost Carmen cry. It was bad enough that they were all forced to have pasta on a taco night – again – because it used to be pasta night with Robby and his mom. But on top of that, the asshole didn’t even have the decency to appreciate it.

“So, how do you like the pasta, Robby?” Carmen asked sweetly.

“It’s fine.” Robby replied sullenly. He was always sullen during dinners and Miguel was always left to fill in any gaps in conversation.

“I heard it was your favorite.” Carmen tried again. “I asked your mom for the recipe.”

“Too many tomatoes.” Robby grunted out.

“Oh.” Carmen was confused. “I’m sorry. Shannon said you liked extra tomatoes.”

“Mom likes them.” Robby clarified. “I always pick them out.”

_And how is that my mom’s fault?,_ Miguel thought angrily. _She is just trying to do something nice for you. The least you could do is say thank-you and pretend to like it._

“I’ll be sure to remember that the next time.” Carmen smiled, sadly. “I’ll try to get it just the way you like it.”

“Stop it, okay? Don’t try to be my mom.” Robby yelled, frustrated. “You are not my mom. And you’ll never be my mom. All this is just temporary – until my mom gets out of rehab. Then I’ll get out of your hair and we’ll never have to see each-other again.”

Miguel saw it then – that look of almost crying on his mom’s face. He could barely contain his anger. He wanted to leap off the chair and shove Robby’s face in his plate right then, but he knew it wouldn’t fix anything and all he’d accomplish would be getting in trouble again. So he bid his time for now.

* * *

Miguel got his chance the next afternoon, after school. Robby sped home on his skateboard as usual. He never walked home with Miguel – rushing back like it was a race instead. But Miguel didn’t mind. Not today, atleast.

Johnny would be at the dojo, teaching classes. Carmen would be at work herself. Yaya would be out with the neighborhood “girls” – not one of whom was younger than sixty. The boys were usually home alone at this time and they spent a few hours ignoring each-other before one of Miguel’s friends came over or Robby headed off to the skate-park. But today, Miguel had a plan.

“Do you want another ass-kicking?” Miguel asked Robby when he came into their bedroom.

Robby looked at him, confused, sitting up in his bed.

“Look, I’m willing to leave you alone, but I can’t have you acting like shit to mom or dad.” Miguel said. “You keep doing that and you are gonna get ass whooped.”

Miguel saw a flash of guilt in his eyes. _He knows what he is doing is wrong._ But it was gone as soon as it came and was replaced with scorn.

“Oooh… you gonna show me your Cobra Kai moves?” Robby scoffed, getting up. He acted confident, but Miguel could see a hint of nervousness in his eyes. “Scary.”

_No choice now._

He couldn’t beat up the guy again, Miguel knew that much. That would just get him in trouble. But Sensei – Johnny was still Sensei at the dojo and in all matters karate – had been teaching them some new stuff as well. Like how to subdue your opponent, cause some pain, but without leaving any sign of it.

It was over before it began. Miguel pushed him a little, just to goad him and then easily dodged the sloppy punch. He grabbed that arm and threw Robby over his shoulder. The boy landed on his back, air going out of him in an “Oof!” and Miguel got on top on top of him right away. He caught Robby’s flailing arms by the wrist and pinned them across his chest, holding him there with one hand. Robby shifted and squirmed, trying to get out, but Miguel pinned his hips to the ground with his legs. Miguel raised his free hand and Robby looked at it in fear for a moment, before turning his face away and squeezing his eyes shut, waiting for the inevitable blow.

_Does he think I’m gonna punch him?_ Miguel thought. _Do I look that stupid?_

“Like my moves?” Miguel taunted him. “Dad taught them to me.”

Robby flinched, but didn’t say anything. He was still waiting for the hit. Miguel grabbed him by the jaw instead, painfully turning it towards him. He leaned forward, until their noses were almost touching. He could feel Robby’s scared breaths on his face and he was sure Robby could feel his as well. Robby opened his eyes and stared up at Miguel, still looking afraid, hurt and confused.

“Now that you know I can kick your ass, are you ready to listen?” Miguel asked.

Robby didn’t answer. He just glared back. It wasn’t a “no”, so Miguel continued.

“I don’t know what your problem is, but you act like an asshole to everybody. And for some reason, mom and dad aren’t doing anything about it. So I’m gonna. You are living here from now on.” Miguel remembered what Carmen had told him and quickly added. “For a while. And during this time, you are gonna behave and be nice to my mom and dad. And I’ll keep kicking your ass until you learn that. Got it?”

Robby spat in his face.

Miguel almost punched him then, but he knew how to control his anger now. So instead, he slipped his hand under Robby’s shirt and dug his fingers into his side in a claw. Robby groaned, trying to escape the hold but Miguel had him pinned. It was painful, he knew, and intensely uncomfortable, but not actually damaging.

“You ready to listen now?” Miguel asked, loosening the hold.

“Fuck you.” Robby replied. “I don’t care. Go on - kick my ass. See what happens.”

_Stubborn asshole._ Well, the guy could take pain, Miguel had to give him that. He had spent a whole day with a broken arm without so much as a peep out of him, after all. But there was more than one way to skin this cat.

Miguel had felt it a moment ago through Robby’s shorts – the growing heat between his legs. He’d felt it touch when he was breathing down Robby’s face and he’d felt it grow bigger when he’d loosened the claw it his side. It wasn’t a big deal – he’d had the same experience with a lot of guys in the dojo, including himself. Teenage boys got boners often and usually for no reason at all. Everyone learned to ignore it out of respect for each-other.

But Robby didn’t deserve the same respect. And the point here was to humiliate him.

Miguel pointedly pressed his knee against Robby’s crotch, moving it up and down a little against his length. He wanted Robby to know that he had noticed and that he now had him. Robby gasped, involuntarily arching up a little, looking for more contact. Then he realized what was happening and his face flushed red in embarrassment.

“Still want me to kick your ass?” Miguel smirked, pressing his knee against his opponent’s balls. “I’m not asking for a lot here, alright? Just for you to - ”

_Shit. I screwed up._ Miguel realized too late. He’d gotten too focused on what was happening down below with his knee digging into Robby’s groin, humiliating the smaller boy and his hand, pinching his side, making him twitch and get harder. But in the process, he’d inadvertently loosened his grip around the wrists and Robby managed to break free and swung a fist right in his face.

“Shit!” Miguel groaned as he fell to the side, eyes watering from the blow to his nose. Robby scrambled up, trying to make a run for it, but Miguel recovered fast. His vision was blurry, but he still managed to grab the back of Robby’s shorts as he tried to escape. The elastic gave and Robby stumbled, falling on all fours.

Miguel was on him again, grabbing him in a headlock and dragging him up. Robby swung his arms wildly, punching Miguel in the stomach twice, but Miguel had had worse. He grunted as he took them and clinched his arm around the head tighter. Robby pushed them both sideways, making them fall to the floor in a tangle.

They rolled around the floor, fighting for dominance with Miguel having the upper hand. He had the advantage of strength, speed, size, stamina and training over the other boy and the result was already decided. But Robby was a scrappy fighter and he just wouldn’t give in. No sooner had Miguel locked in one limb than the other swung up, freeing him and starting over again. Miguel knew he could’ve finished this with a few well-placed punches but he was determined not to cross that line this time.

In the end, it was over once Miguel had him pinned face down inescapably. His legs were wrapped around Robby’s thighs sideways, holding them in place. His elbow dug painfully into Robby’s bare back, his shirt having ridden up during the fight. One arm was twisted behind his back, while the other tried to uselessly push at the floor. Robby huffed in frustration, still trying to squirm free, but he was too exhausted to have any real fight left in him. And somehow, through it all, he was still hard. Miguel could feel the boner pressing into his thigh.

“You act like a brat, you know that?” Miguel said, panting himself. “So I’m gonna treat you like one.”

The first slap that landed on Robby’s upturned ass made him freeze in place. The second one he didn’t seem to notice at all. Miguel paused, considering how to do this. Carmen hadn’t really spanked him in ages – not since the last time when he’d beat Robby up – and she’d gone over his pants at the time. But Robby didn’t respond to pain and the point here was humiliation. So Miguel pulled his boxers down to his thighs, exposing his pink cheeks to his sight.

“What the hell?” Robby shouted, starting to struggle again. “Let me go!”

“Nobody’s home.” Miguel said. “Which is lucky for you. Unless you want them to come in and see you with your ass hanging out.”

Robby went very still at that. And Miguel figured he was getting somewhere.

“Your mom never spanked you, did she?” He asked. Then he slapped the bare butt when Robby wouldn’t answer. “Did she?”

“No.” Robby said, with a trembling voice.

“That’s why you are such an asshole.” Miguel said, feeling confident about his choice. “And this is your punishment. To teach you how to be better in the future.”

Miguel slapped the perky cheek again, making Robby whimper. He brought his hand down again and again – _smack, smack, smack –_ until the whole backside was bright red. Robby started crying at some point, soft, humiliated sobs that went straight to Miguel’s groin. He spanked him harder after that until he lost count of how many times.

_Should I stop?_ Miguel asked himself, looking at the glowing pink red under his face. _How does mom always know when to stop?_

Belatedly, he remembered the answer. This was nothing like how mom did it – and not just because it wasn’t over the pants. Carmen always started with telling him exactly why she was doing it and exactly how many he could expect. And she always went in a steady pace, making Miguel count them and pausing if and when he started crying. She’d never just rained down the blows like Miguel just had.

“I’m gonna do this ten more times, okay?” Miguel said softly. “And I want you to count the ten blows. This doesn’t stop until you do, got it?”

Robby didn’t say anything, so Miguel spanked him again. More firm and deliberate this time. It must have hurt a little less but it’d have still stung. But Robby didn’t say anything so Miguel did it again. He had to do it two more times before Robby spoke up.

“One…” Robby said, tremulously and Miguel sighed in relief. He didn’t know how long he could’ve kept it up.

And curiously, he also felt a little proud. Of Robby. The guy could’ve started the count with “four”, and this time, Miguel probably would’ve let him. But no – he was ready to take the full ten and that was something.

_Smack._ “Two”. _Smack_. “Three”…….. _Smack_. “Ten”.

Miguel sighed in relief. _Okay, that was over. Now what?_ He loosened his grip, letting Robby’s arm go and lifting his elbow. Robby immediately started sobbing again in relief and Miguel felt a little bad. _But it had to be done, right?_

It also had to be done right. Back when he was younger, his mom would always hold him and shush him comfortingly after punishment. But somehow, that didn’t seem right here. So instead, Miguel just ran a soothing hand on Robby’s bottom and heard him suck in a breath. The skin felt almost hot under his hand and he felt Robby’s cock jerk against his thigh.

_He should jerk off._ Miguel thought. _He knows how to jerk off, right?_ Something just occurred to him. _Maybe be doesn’t. Maybe that’s why he is cranky all the time. He just had his mom around and you don’t talk to your mom about that stuff._

“You know how to jerk off, right?” Miguel asked.

Robby stiffened again, not saying anything.

Could that be it? The simple solution to all their problems? Just teach Robby how to tug one out? Miguel knew how frustrating it could be – how a boner could just drive you crazy, throbbing and pulsing in your pants when you were unable to do anything about it because there were people around. In fact, it’d been one of the most annoying things about sharing a room with Robby – not being able to get himself off whenever he wanted. They’d kept their distance though, giving each-other privacy and Miguel had found time to take care of it anyway. And he’d figured Robby must have been doing the same.

But maybe not.

“It’s easy. I’ll show you.” He said, disentangling himself and pulling Robby up. “And there is nothing wrong with it. No reason to be ashamed. Dad told me that.”

Robby looked at him in blank hurt, pulling the hem of his shirt down to cover himself. “Dad showed you?”

“No.” Miguel said indignantly. “That would be weird. He just took me camping last year and we talked about guy stuff. C’mon, I’ll show you.”

Miguel felt excited. This one thing could solve everything. And it could help him be friends with Robby. He didn’t wait for an answer – he just started stripping Robby off. He pulled down his pants and underwear rest of the way, forcing him to step out of them. Then he pulled his shirt over his head as well.

“You don’t want it to get messy. In case you are a shooter, like me.” Miguel said, smiling. “Do you need lube? Have you got any?”

Robby shook his head and Miguel went to his drawer to pull out his own tube, practically unused. Johnny had bought it for him, told him it’d make things easier, but Miguel was uncut, so he didn’t actually need it. It always made more of a mess that was tough to cleanup. But Robby…

Miguel looked down at him. Yes, he’d probably need it. He was circumcised and his dick was thick and pink between his legs, it’s head almost purple. Robby was embarrassed and tried to cover himself again, but Miguel just slapped his hand out of the way, annoyed, before pushing him back in his bed.

“Okay – so what you want to do is, put some lube on your hand.” Miguel pulled out Robby’s hand and squirted some on it. “Then wrap your fist around it and slowly move it up and down.” He guided Robby’s hand to his crotch, encouragingly. “Go on. It’ll feel good.”

Robby hesitated at first, touching himself tentatively. Then he gripped himself tighter and started jerking off faster as Miguel stood back and watched him critically. His cock was nice enough, Miguel supposed. About the same size as him, probably, but they were both still growing. And the guy looked like he was a natural. He wasn’t even looking at himself. He was staring at Miguel, open-mouthed, his tear-streaked face red with embarrassment.

Maybe he did know how to jerk off. Maybe he just hadn’t done it since he’d been living with them. After all, given how much time his mom gave to him on his own, it’d be weird if he’d never played with himself. But he hadn’t had that kind of privacy ever since he moved in with them. So…

But it was alright now. They were both guys here, so there was nothing to be ashamed about. Johnny always said guys could be open with each-other about stuff they couldn’t talk to girls about. And they weren’t actually brothers, so there was nothing weird about it. Miguel could even give him the lube to use. Why not? It wasn’t like he needed it.

Robby came with soft moans as he shot all over his chest as abs. He looked even more scared after, but Miguel smiled encouragingly before tossing him his cum-towel to wipe himself off.

_Okay, this should be fine now. We had a good moment and –_

“I’m not an asshole.” Robby said, tremulously. “I just don’t want to live here, alright? I want to go back to my own home. I don’t like you people. Kicking my butt won’t change that and it doesn’t make me an asshole.”

Miguel frowned. He didn’t have the energy to start up all over again and Robby was just being honest, right? Still, acting like that when Miguel was just done being nice to him…

“Well, nobody wants you here either. We are just stuck with you.” Miguel said. “But everyone else is still nice about it and you are gonna be too. Got it?”

Robby didn’t say anything and he looked like he was about to start crying again. Miguel felt bad for a moment. _Why wouldn’t he want to be here? After everything Mom does for him?_

Or maybe that was the reason. Seeing Carmen be all super-mom made him feel bad about his own neglectful mother. Maybe it’d be better if Carmen didn’t try so hard. Maybe Miguel could talk to her about it.

“Just put on some clothes and don’t act like a little shit again.” Miguel said, throwing Robby’s underwear in his face.

* * *

Things were kind of better after that.

Ofcourse, Carmen noticed the bruise on his face right away. But Miguel had gotten good at lying to her about stuff like that. It was an unspoken rule that guys didn’t rat each-other out to their moms if they could help it.

“It’s fine.” Miguel said. “I caught an elbow from Hawk.”

“I told you no karate outside the dojo.” Carmen said firmly.

“You said no _fighting_ outside the dojo.” Miguel corrected her. “We weren’t fighting, we were practicing. And it was an accident. Let it go.”

Robby didn’t have much to say about that. In fact, he didn’t have much to say about anything after that. He had always been a quiet boy, but now, he was more subdued. Like he never criticized Carmen’s cooking again. He also avoided her more – which Miguel explained to her later. But he accepted their generosity without much resistance afterwards.

Like with his fourteenth birthday. Mom and dad offered to throw him a party, but he refused. Politely, not sullenly, Miguel noted with approval.

“I’d prefer to hang out with my friends.” Robby said.

“What friends?” Miguel scoffed. “You sit alone at lunch every day.”

“I thought he was supposed to sit with you.” Carmen said, eyes flashing in anger.

Miguel felt guilty at that. He was supposed to be helping Robby make friends at school. But the guy was such a downer all the time and none of his friends liked him.

“It’s fine.” Robby said. “I’d rather not sit with those losers anyway.”

“Some of those losers are my students.” Johnny told him.

Robby smirked. “Thus proving my point.”

Miguel got him for that comment that night. After everyone was asleep, he dragged Robby from the bed and spanked him twenty times over his PJs. The next morning, Robby apologized for his comment and said he’d like to have a quiet family dinner for his birthday.

Carmen gave him a brand new journal to write in that day.

“I used to have one when I was your age.” She said. “To write about my feelings and stuff. I know, guys are all like ‘we don’t have feelings’, but writing this stuff down helps. Trust me. And if either of these two say anything about it, you tell me and I’ll set them straight.” Carmen finished with a threatening glare at Miguel and Johnny.

Robby thanked her politely and Miguel knew he did end up appreciating that gift. He never actually saw Robby write in it, but he did take it to school everyday and Miguel saw him take it out of his backpack and lock it in his desk when they came back.

Johnny gave him a new skateboard, even though Robby said he already had one.

“Yeah, but this is the latest model. It’s called a waveboard now. See?” Johnny said showing him the underside. “It’s only got two wheels and - ”

“I know what a waveboard is.” Robby said quietly. “I just like using the one mom gave me.” 

_You mean I gave you,_ Miguel thought, annoyed. Robby hadn’t accepted any money from them, so Johnny had given it to Shannon instead. Miguel had lost months of his allowance for that stupid thing and he didn’t even get the credit for it.

“You could use both.” Johnny said, determined to keep the smile on his face.

Robby nodded and accepted and Miguel breathed a sigh of relief. He didn’t want to punish the guy on his birthday.

He seemed almost excited about Yaya’s gift though. It was a small wooden box and Robby gasped and blushed when he opened it. And then quickly closed it so nobody else would see.

“What is it?” Johnny asked, curious.

“Just some accessories every growing boy needs.” Rosa replied in Spanish, smirking and winking secretively.

“Yeah, just accessories.” Robby agreed quickly. _When did he start speaking Spanish?_

Miguel’s gift seemed pretty lame in comparison. Just a new Cobra Kai T-shirt. Robby might’ve been too pussy to join – no matter how many times Johnny asked – but there was a rep that went with being a Cobra. No reason why Robby couldn’t take advantage of it.


	6. Miguel III

Miguel had a secret weapon now and he was not afraid to use it.

No – not spanking. He only had to do that that like three times. And he was always worried about Robby telling Johnny or Carmen on him. Sure it was to improve Robby’s attitude and it was working – Robby didn’t give them as much lip anymore. And sure there was room for a lot more improvement – Robby still didn’t focus on his studies much. No matter how much both Johnny and Miguel tried to inspire him by showing off Miguel’s accomplishments. Something like that would’ve lit a fire inside Miguel, would’ve made him want to prove himself – but Robby just stared blankly like he didn’t care. But still, they wouldn’t see what Miguel was trying to do. They’d only accuse him of being mean.

Like that time with those two guys at school last year. That had been a humiliating disaster. Miguel had thought he was being a hero when he saw the bigger guy sitting on the smaller one, pushing his face in the grass and decided to intervene. He’d remembered his lessons about restraint and just told the guy to get off first - but all he’d gotten in response had been a “fuck-off”. So he’d kicked the bully off his victim, nailing him with a roundhouse to the jaw. He’d tried to threaten the guy, tried to tell him that if he ever caught him bullying someone again....

And then the smaller guy had tackled _him_. The victim that Miguel had just saved had turned on _him_. Ofcourse Miguel had to defend himself. Which had then led to the bigger guy coming at him. A teacher had stepped in at some point, thankfully – a two-on-one fight was too much even for Miguel when he actually didn't want to hurt one of them. All three of them had gotten in trouble, but Miguel most of all. They all had detention, but that was nothing compared to what had happened at home.

How the hell was Miguel supposed to know that they’d been brothers?

“It looked like bullying.” Miguel had explained it to his mom a hundred times. “He was sitting on him, pushing his face into the grass. Telling him to eat it. And the other guy was begging for him to let him up. And that guy was just laughing at him. And I didn’t just get into a fight – I told him to let go first. I did the right thing. I obviously got it wrong, but it was the right thing.”

“The right thing would’ve been to call a teacher.” Carmen had replied, sternly.

“Carmen, you can’t tell the kid to be a snitch.” Johnny had said. “He’d have a target on his back.”

“Snitch?” She’d turned on him incredulously. “It’s school. Not a prison.”

“Trust me. Prison would be easier. Atleast you know where you stand there.”

How the hell was Miguel supposed to have the answer when those two didn’t? In the end, they couldn’t agree on it at all. But they had come up with a new rule – avoid karate outside of the dojo as much as possible. And no trying to be a hero. Things weren’t always what they looked like and if Miguel didn’t know the whole story, the smart thing would be to stay out of it.

Miguel understood that now. Maybe he should’ve understood it before as well. After all, guys from Cobra Kai messed around with each-other and that obviously wasn’t bullying. And now, the same could be said of what had happened with Robby. But the logic went both ways and just like how he hadn’t understood the context back then, Johnny and Carmen wouldn’t understand now.

Miguel wasn’t fully sure he did either. Especially with what happened that day.

* * *

He’d been on edge all day. Especially after a particularly intense class with Sensei. He usually stuck around afterwards, in the office doing his homework while Sensei finished off two more batches, but he was too antsy today. He couldn’t wait to get back home, lie in his bed and jerk off. And he practically ran back, hoping Robby would already be gone to the skate-park. He hadn’t even bothered to change out of his sweaty gi, deciding that he’d just have a shower later.

No such luck. Robby was still home – looking at himself in the mirror in a white karate gi. _Miguel’s_ karate gi. One of his spares.

“What the hell?” Miguel laughed, watching him. Was he preening?

Robby flushed in embarrassment at being caught. It wasn’t even a fresh pair. Miguel knew that his third pair was still in laundry and would magically appear in his closet next day. This was the one Miguel had worn yesterday and Robby had gotten it out of the hamper.

“Just wanted to know what the big deal was.” Robby tried be casual. “Still don’t see it.”

Miguel smiled smugly. So Robby wanted to join Cobra Kai after all. Sure he’d refused every time Johnny had asked, but he was allowed to change his mind. And maybe it wouldn’t be that bad. Miguel already shared Johnny with like a thousand other kids at the dojo anyway. He wouldn’t mind adding Robby to the list.

“Hey, since you are wearing that already, how about I show you some moves?” Miguel asked, enthusiastically. He still had a lot of pent up energy to spare today. But Robby looked scared at the suggestion.

“I’m sorry. Please.” He pleaded. “I’ll stay out of your stuff, okay?”

 _Does he think I’m just looking for an excuse to beat him up?_ Miguel thought, annoyed. _Is that what he thinks of me?_

“C’mon, it’ll be fun.” Miguel insisted, holding up his palm. “Make a fist and punch me. Right here.”

Robby hesitated and Miguel smiled encouraging him. The first punch was hesitant. Weak. Miguel barely felt it on his palm.

“Okay – so you need to make your fist right.” He said, showing him. “Thumb under there like this or you will end up breaking it. Try again.”

The second one was better. Stronger. But still not good enough.

“You need to correct your stance too.” Miguel said, moving behind Robby and adjusting his hips. “Left foot forward. Legs apart.” He moved them with his feet. “Loosen your hips.” He put his hands on Robby’s waist, turning him slightly. “Swing with your whole upper body. Okay? Put your shoulder into it.” Miguel got back in position, raising his palm again.

Robby swung hard. It was actually good this time. Like it’d actually hurt.

“Awesome.” Miguel said. “Do that again exactly like that.”

Robby did it two more times before he stepped back, seemingly upset.

“I think that’s enough for me.” He said, putting his arms down.

_What? But we just got started._

“Could you just go out for a bit?” Robby asked. “So I can change?”

“Just change in front of me.” Miguel replied, annoyed. “You’ve done that a thousand times before. And then get out of my room. I need to jerk off.”

“It’s my room too.” Robby said plaintively. “You can just jerk off in the bathroom, while I change.”

“No.” Miguel refused flatly. _Who does this guy think he is? Ordering me around like that._ “You go change in the bathroom, princess.”

Robby stared at him sullenly for a moment and then gave up. “Fine.” He turned around to gather his clothes.

What was wrong with this guy? Why was he accepting it so meekly? None of Miguel’s friends would’ve agreed to it this easily. Robby would never survive in Cobra Kai with that attitude.

“Hey, we are not done here.” Miguel said, stepping between Robby and the door. “I’m trying to teach you to fight.”

Robby backed away, scared.

“I don’t want to fight.” He said. 

“Yeah – but sometimes you don’t have a choice.” Miguel explained. “Do you want to keep getting your ass kicked?”

Robby shook his head stubbornly. “I don’t want to hurt anyone.”

Miguel pursed his lips, annoyed. Was Robby actually sweet on the inside? Or was he just a pussy?

Well, fighting without hurting wasn’t exactly a new concept. Sensei had been teaching them some new stuff lately – judo throws that were meant to subdue your opponent without hurting them unless they hurt themselves. That could work for Robby, right?

Miguel rushed forward as Robby backed up, raising his arms in defense. Miguel went around them, grabbing him by the lapels, hooking his leg around Robby’s and swinging him, throwing him to the floor. He made sure the guy had a soft landing this time.

Robby squeezed his eyes shut, waiting for Miguel to start hitting him, but Miguel just leaned in closer.

“Did that hurt?” He whispered.

Robby opened his eyes, confused and considering. The he shook his head.

“See? That’s how you can take down an opponent without hurting them.” Miguel explained. “The trick is to grab them and use their momentum and weight against them. Let me show you.”

They got up and Miguel put his hands on Robby again, showing him how to position his body and execute the throw. They squared off and Miguel let Robby throw him this time. They got up and did it again with Miguel ending up on top.

 _This is working. And it feels great._ Miguel thought. Robby was already looking disheveled. His hair was falling on his face and his shoulder was bared – but he looked less scared. More excited. Almost smiling.

Miguel threw him to the floor again, pulling out his gi from his belt on the one side. He pinned his shoulders and hips to the ground in a display of dominance before letting him up again.

Miguel’s own belt was coming loose, so he paused to adjust it and Robby used the chance to charge at him. _Cute. Nice try._ Miguel just threw him to the floor again, trying to pin him down. Robby struggled harder this time, shifting and squirming and pushing at Miguel’s chest. He wrapped his legs around Miguel’s and bucked his hips up, trying to dislodge him.

Miguel could feel Robby’s erection pressing against this thigh and pushed down on it, making Robby squirm some more. _He’s pent up, just like me._ Miguel thought, feeling his own hard-on against Robby’s hip-bone. _Maybe we can jerk off together after this. Could be fun._

Robby was already breathing heavily from the exertion, but those breaths suddenly changed to almost painful gasps. He arched his hips up, pressing his groin deeper into Miguel’s thigh. His eyes went blank and rolled back into his head as his mouth fell open with his lips trembling. Miguel stared down in surprise as he felt tremors run through the body under him. _Is he having a seizure?_

Robby’s whole body went slack after and his face looked blissfully calm. It only lasted a moment before Robby was looking at Miguel looking down on him. And Miguel could see the fear and shame back in that face. He looked down between them and in confirmed what he thought.

“Did you just cream your undies?” Miguel said, laughing. He’d never seen this before.

Color rose in Robby’s cheeks and he looked away. Miguel smirked and looked down again. The pants had slipped down a little during their struggle, revealing the white briefs inside. He could already see them wet in the front, the stain spreading to the waistband.

Wait a second – briefs? But Robby preferred boxers and these briefs…

“Did you just cream _my_ undies?” Miguel asked, surprised. 

He pulled down the waistband to confirm before Robby could lie about it. Sure enough, they were his.

“I ran out of clean underwear.” Robby said, embarrassed.

“So you decided to wear my dirty ones?” Miguel asked. These were the ones he’d worn yesterday and put them in wash with his gi. “You realize that I jerked off in them yesterday, right?”

Robby tried to get up but Miguel held him down in place.

What was going on here? Something was happening. This was why Robby didn’t want to change in front of him - because he didn’t want Miguel to see that he was wearing his underwear. Yesterday’s cum-and-sweat soaked underwear under Miguel’s sweaty gi. He was embarrassed. He should be embarrassed.

So why did he do it in the first place? It was all connected somehow – Robby getting hard when Miguel spanked him. Robby jerking off in front of him. Robby wearing his clothes. Robby cumming in his pants, practically untouched, rubbing off against him.

Could it be…? No. Robby didn’t have a crush on him, right? It was just physical contact. But Miguel had to know for sure.

“Take off my clothes.” Miguel instructed him, letting him up.

Robby nodded, not looking at him, as he headed to the door.

“No!” Miguel said, blocking his way again. “Take them off right now.”

Robby looked stricken, but complied. One by one, they all fell to the floor until the smaller boy was standing in front of him naked. He looked red and pink all over, determinedly looking at the floor with his hands covering his groin.

 _Well, this doesn’t tell me anything._ Miguel thought. _And it’s not like he’s going to admit it. He’ll insist that he came because of all the touching and that he was just trying out my underwear for size. That’s what I told myself when I put on his boxers that one time._

But maybe there was one way to know for sure. Robby had just cum, right? So if it was only about the touching, he should be fine for the next few hours. But if Miguel could make him hard again… that would prove it.

Miguel loosened his belt and took off his gi-shirt.

“You like my sweaty clothes so much? Here.” He said, throwing it in Robby’s face. “Take a good sniff.”

Robby didn’t move. He just stood there, covering himself, looking down and letting the cloth fall to the ground. Miguel felt his annoyance rise some more. _This isn’t going to work if he stands there like a statue._

“Not good enough?” Miguel asked, walking up to Robby and grabbing him by his hair. He forced him to look up and saw the kid’s wide, scared eyes. “You want the real thing now?”

He pushed Robby’s face into his damp chest, moving it sideways until the nose was digging into his armpit. Robby lifted his hands to grab Miguel’s finally removing them from his crotch and Miguel saw his cock all soft and shrunken and spent between his legs.

“Please. I’m sorry.” Robby begged. “I’ll never - ”

“Shut up.” Miguel snapped. He was in no mood for Robby’s whining right now. He knew that he listened to him, he’d feel bad for the boy and stop. And he couldn’t stop – he had to know. It felt like he was on the verge of discovering something. “I’m not pissed off about you taking the clothes. Nor about you coming in them either.”

Robby looked at him, confused and Miguel wracked his brain. He needed to find a way to make him less scared.

“I just need to figure something out.” He said, finally. “I won't hurt you - promise. Just do what I tell you.”

Robby nodded hurriedly and dropped his hands, resting them at the waistband of Miguel gi. Miguel moved to the side, letting his clothed thigh rub against Robby’s crotch and suddenly realized the position he was in. _He could throw me like this,_ He thought as he pushed Robby’s head back to his chest. _All he needs to do is hook his leg around mine and push. C’mon, do it. I’ll just laugh and let you go, if you do._

He felt Robby’s lips on his chest instead. The first kiss was hesitant, almost shy. The next one was bolder. Then they moved to his nipple and Robby stuck his tongue out, licking it and Miguel sucked in his breath.

_Holy shit! He does have a crush on me. And… and I’m okay with it. Better than okay – I’ve never been harder._

He grabbed Robby’s hand, guiding it to the front of his gi until Robby got the message. It slipped inside, in front of his underwear, fondling Miguel through it. Then it dipped inside the waistband of his underwear, searching for his tool. Miguel gasped as it found the target and started fondling and stroking him.

 _Feels different, having someone else’s hand on me. Good different._ He wrapped his arm around Robby’s neck and pulled him in tight, his face between Miguel’s pec and armpit. He knew Robby could smell his sweat and musk with every breath. Robby’s hand was stroking Miguel’s cock now, inside his underwear, more confidently. Miguel let his other hand drop to Robby’s backside, grabbing a fistful of asscheek and squeezing it. He felt Robby grow harder against his thigh in response.

_Hence proven._

He came soon after, gripping Robby so tight that he almost smothered the boy against him. He filled his own briefs this time, feeling his cum squelch around and Robby gave him a few last tugs. He still held Robby like that, breathing heavily into his hair and riding the afterglow until he grew soft in Robby’s grip.

He backed off then, letting Robby take his cum-soaked hand out and saw him look at it with trepidation. Robby threw him a scared, questioning look as if asking what to do next – but Miguel had his answer already.

“Clean that up.” He said, shortly, gesturing to Robby’s hand.

Robby looked even more scared at that. He closed his eyes and brought his palm to his face, slowly licking off Miguel’s cum off his fingers.

“Eww… gross.” Miguel said, horrified and Robby stopped immediately.

Miguel felt disgusted all of a sudden – with himself. _How can I do that to him? Make him sniff me and jerk me off? Even if he has a crush, it doesn’t mean…_

_No, it’s not my fault. It’s his. He could’ve thrown me – he was in the perfect position for that. I didn’t ask him to kiss me and lick me – he did that on his own. I didn’t tell him to lick my cum. Heck, I put my balls in his hands. He could’ve just grabbed and pulled until I let go. He wanted to do this. He liked it. And he is still hard. He’s the disgusting one._

“You are a freak.” Miguel said, pushing Robby to the bed. “Jerk yourself off. I’m going for a shower.”

Miguel left him like that, naked and hard, as he grabbed a towel and stormed off.

Guilt came a little later, as he let the water rinse the soap off his body. _That wasn’t nice, the way I treated him and called him names. He is not really a bad guy. I’ll apologize when I go back and I’ll treat him nicer from now on._

But Robby was already gone by the time Miguel got back to their room. 

* * *

That was Miguel’s secret weapon now, the knowledge that Robby had a crush on him. He didn’t actually mind it. It was a compliment, right? And Miguel had always liked being liked. And it wasn’t like they were actually brothers – so it wasn’t weird either. Ofcourse, Robby would never actually admit to it. You never admit to stuff like that. Which is why Miguel didn’t either.

He liked Robby too, he realized. He liked how Robby made him chase him around the house until they were both breathless and Miguel was pinning him down, pushing his face into the carpet. He liked how Robby squirmed against him, trying to escape and ended up rubbing his butt against Miguel’s groin. He liked how he could always make Robby jump with a slap to his butt or a pinch on the side or simply running his foot along his leg during dinner. He liked how Robby’s soft hair tickled his face and his warm breath caressed his neck when he had him in a bear-hug. He liked how much stronger he was – he liked showing that off – and Robby liked it too. He’d never say it, but Miguel could tell by the way he always grew hard in his pants when Miguel did that stuff.

Johnny and Carmen didn’t really notice anything – Miguel made sure of that. He wouldn’t want to humiliate Robby like that.

They almost got caught once, when Miguel snatched the remote from Robby’s hand, changing the channel. This time Robby snatched it back and they ended up tussling on the couch for it. Robby was in his boxers and Miguel didn’t miss the chance to rub him through the thin material. Except, Johnny and Carmen were right there in the kitchen.

“Miguel!” Carmen shouted. “Stop it right now!”

But Johnny stopped her from intervening. “It’s fine. Just boys being boys.”

They whispered then, but Miguel could hear them clearly.

“Miguel needs to learn that - ” Carmen started.

“Honey, do you know how long I’ve waited for this day?” Johnny interrupted her in a hushed voice. “They are fighting like brothers. Roughhousing. They are finally getting there. You don’t know how long I’ve wanted this to happen.”

Carmen looked annoyed for a moment, but then looked over at them and smiled. She still told them to stop though.

Robby was hard in his boxers and Miguel knew that he’d tent out and everyone would see. So he casually lied back on the couch, putting his legs in Robby’s lap and hiding his erection. He even changed the channel back to what Robby was watching before. They stayed like that for the hour, with Robby being nervous as a rabbit about his boner and Miguel doing his best to comfort the guy.


	7. Miguel IV

Robby came to Cobra Kai for just one day. After Miguel told him that he had to and that he’d kick his ass for real if he didn’t. He figured once Robby saw how awesome it was he’d end up loving it anyway.

And it was a great class too. Sensei went easier on them than usual. And he didn’t yell at Robby even once – even when Robby was getting his stance wrong. Anyone else would’ve gotten an earful for that.

He even paired Robby with Miguel for sparring, whispering to him to go easy. And Miguel did, even though it turned out that Robby was more of a natural with the right instructions. He even got a few genuine good hits in before Miguel put him on the floor. Miguel won all three points, ofcourse. He had too much experience to lose even a single point to someone trying out his first class. But Robby got the basics right away and Miguel knew that he’d be pretty good very soon.

“I don’t want to learn karate.” Robby said sullenly that night at dinner.

They were both surprised – Miguel and Johnny. They’d both thought that this had been a good class.

“Buddy, you need to learn this stuff.” Johnny tried gently. “You don’t want to get your ass kicked, do you?”

“Miguel’s the only one kicking my ass.” Robby replied. “Nobody else bothers me. And I don’t want to learn. I can skateboard – isn’t that good enough?”

Was it because he lost to Miguel today? That was stupid, right? Robby didn’t expect to become an expert in one day, did he?

“Robby - ” Johnny started.

“Johnny.” Carmen said, sternly. She deliberately enunciated every word. “If he doesn’t want to learn karate, that’s okay. Not everybody has to like the same things. Right?”

Johnny sighed. “Alright. If you ever change your mind…”

Miguel was pretty annoyed at that. Robby was a pussy after all. And after everyone had gone so easy on him too. He’d hurt dad/Sensei by being stubborn and Miguel let his displeasure known that night.

“You were an ass today.” He said to the boy, pinning him to the bed. “And you know what that means. Twenty spanks and I want you to count them. You miss a count and we start over.”

He made Robby strip his clothes off for this after everyone had gone to bed. He put Robby across his lap and spanked him again. Robby counted them down and he didn’t cry this time. Miguel’s anger dissolved by the fifteenth but he finished them anyway and then he decided to reward Robby for taking his punishment like a man.

Robby hadn’t gotten hard this time, so Miguel gently tugged him, letting his cock fill up in his hand as he rubbed soothing circles over the warm butt. He coaxed an orgasm out of the boy before going back to his own bed and jerking himself off.

* * *

Now that Miguel knew Johnny liked them roughhousing, he started to do that a lot more. Now he finally got that thing between those two brothers – why even though he’d “saved” the younger one from the older one, the younger one had attacked him all the same. It was the same with him and Robby – Robby might pretend to be annoyed, but he secretly liked it when Miguel messed with him.

So it became more and more common. A slap on the ass when he passed by. Grabbing him into a headlock out of nowhere and rubbing his knuckles into Robby’s soft hair. Twisting his nipples until they were purple. Pushing his hand down the back of his pants and yanking his underwear up, giving him a wedgie.

But they both instinctively knew that there were lines they couldn’t cross outside of their bedroom. Some of the stuff was just between the two of them.

Like this time when Miguel decided to mess with him a little by putting on his clothes for a change. Robby came back from skateboarding – all sweaty and dusty, clearly having fallen over a bunch of times - and saw him lounging on the bed in his blue t-shirt and shorts.

“Those are mine.” Robby said, plaintively.

“So?” Miguel shrugged. “You wore my clothes. Why can’t I wear yours?”

Robby frowned, but didn’t say anything. He just grabbed a towel and headed off to the shower. Miguel did his best to contain his excitement. The guy had no idea what was coming to him.

Robby came back, dripping wet with a towel wrapped around his waist and Miguel admired the view. He might not be into karate, but all that skateboarding sure paid off. Robby was growing up in all the right places and Miguel loved feeling up those developing muscles.

He rummaged through his closet before stopping, staying in place with his head hanging.

“Lose something?” Miguel asked, already knowing the answer.

“I can’t find my underwear.” Robby said, sullenly.

“Told you already. I’m wearing them.” Miguel smirked.

“All of them?” Robby looked at him angrily and Miguel grinned harder.

Huffing, Robby made his way to the hamper, digging around and Miguel laughed. Ofcourse he wasn’t going to overlook that option.

“Dude, c’mon. It’s not funny.” Robby begged. “Please just let me get dressed.”

_Why is he always so prissy? We are just guys here._

Miguel got up and walked towards him. As usual, Robby shrank back until the bigger boy was crowding him against the wall.

“Tell you what?” Miguel said. “You can have your undies back after you jerk me off. Deal?”

Robby sighed in defeat.

That was a fun one. Miguel whipped Robby’s towel off and smirked as he grew harder despite himself. He took the shirt off and told Robby to sit on him as he jerked him off. He could see Robby peeking glances as him as well and Miguel loved that. He had every right to be proud of his body. He was still kinda skinny but his own growing muscles were unmistakable.

“Like what you see?” Miguel smirked, pulling him to bed.

He let Robby pull his shorts down to his knees but wouldn’t let him take his underwear off. Robby straddled his waist, sitting backwards, giving Miguel a great view of his broad, muscled back, tapering down to that cute bubble butt. Drops of water flowed down from Robby’s wet hair, trailing down his back and onto Miguel. He felt Robby touch him through the cloth, hesitant at first, then bolder and more deliberate.

Miguel moaned and arched his back, moving up into the touch. He moved his hands down Robby’s back grabbing his cheeks and making him lift himself as he spread them apart. He’d see Robby’s butt before, but never like this – never spread apart. The skin was darker on the inside, all the way down to the pink, furled hole surrounded by a dusting of dark hair.

Miguel had never seen that before and it felt… exciting. Like he was seeing a part of Robby that nobody did – not even Robby himself. He ran a finger down the cleft, rubbing around the pucker a little before moving it lower between the legs.

Miguel finished inside Robby’s boxer-briefs, bucking his hips and moaning harder than before. Robby stood back up and waited, hands covering his own hard-on. Miguel smiled and took off the shorts and the underwear before wiping his crotch with him.

“There.” Miguel said, throwing the soaked boxer-briefs to Robby. “A deal’s a a deal, right?”

Robby made a show of annoyed frustration before wordlessly picking them up from the floor and turning around to put them on. Miguel was on him as soon as they were in place, grabbing him by the waist and pulling him close. He was still half-hard and he rubbed that against Robby’s ass.

“Time to repay the favor.” He whispered, pushing his hand inside the front of the wet briefs.

Robby groaned but didn’t say anything. He was tense in the beginning, but soon relaxed as Miguel stroked him and rubbed his chest, pinching his nipples. He nuzzled his wet hair and sucked the water off his neck as Robby gave out soft gasps of pleasure. Eventually his other hand went down the back of the underwear and between the cheeks. He explored the valley with his fingers, rubbing the soft skin and circling the furled ring of muscle.

 _I love you like this,_ Miguel wanted to say. _I love having you helpless and desperate in my arms. Makes me want to make you feel so good. Makes me want to make you cry in pleasure._

Robby came with a soft cry, ruining that underwear for the second time that day. Miguel grinned happily, patting his butt and kissing his cheek. He let Robby get dressed, still in those spunk-filled undies while Miguel put his own clothes on.

The guy was uncomfortable, Miguel noticed after about fifteen minutes. Squirming on the bed and adjusting himself constantly. _Why doesn’t he just say anything?_

“I put your stuff in my closet.” Miguel said, finally sparing him. “You can get them now.”

Robby jumped off and retrieved them immediately, arms full of clothes being stuffed back into his closet. He picked one out and ran to the bathroom to change and Miguel found himself getting annoyed at that.

_Really? After what we just did. Now he is embarrassed to be naked in front of me?_

* * *

Miguel didn’t get it at first – Robby’s weird shyness around him. They’d both seen each-other naked. Then he realized that he was doing the same thing. He thought about how it was okay for guys to be naked around each-other, but he often kept his clothes on while making Robby strip for him. That wasn’t fair, right? If he liked looking at Robby, then Robby should get to look at him too.

Miguel started getting more open around Robby too. He switched to boxers as well and once the summer started he usually lounged around the house in his boxers and tank-tops. Robby acted like he didn’t care, but Miguel caught him sneaking glances every now and then.

Robby didn’t laugh much. Even his smiles were rare. But that was just how he’d always been. Miguel would get him there one day. No, they weren’t in love – Robby had a crush and Miguel was starting to love him, but it wasn’t love-love. He just liked hanging around the boy, teasing him, making him squirm.

His favorite time was when they were both dressed similarly in tank-tops and boxers. It was especially hot that summer and with the school out, they often spent hours together at home, alone. Despite the fans, they’d still end up sweating like pigs anyway.

Miguel loved surprising Robby like this. They’d just be sitting on the couch, watching TV and Miguel would jump on top of him, practically pushing him between the cushions. The sweat made everything wet and slippery and Miguel loved how his hands glided along Robby’s body.

“Dude, it’s too hot.” Robby complained.

He always found some complaint, even though he knew it was about to happen and he loved it anyway. Miguel had just learned to ignore it. He just pushed the tank-top up into the armpits and sucked the sweat off Robby’s nipples. He moved up to do the same to the drops pooling in his clavicle.

“Don’t act like you don’t like it.” Miguel said, groping Robby’s growing bulge to make a point.

Miguel smiled, getting up and taking his tank-top off. It’d be fine. He knew no one would be home for hours.

“You can feel me up too.” He said, flexing his muscles. “You like this, right?”

Robby looked up at him, afraid, but with desire clear in him eyes. Miguel didn’t get it. They’d done this a bunch of times – why did Robby always get so nervous? Was it because Miguel had called him a freak that time? No, that couldn’t be it. Miguel liked this too - which made him a freak too. Robby got that, right?

Robby hesitatingly moved his hand over Miguel’s muscles, tracing the sweat from his chest to the groove of his abs. He looked at Miguel for permission before pulling his shorts down and then put his hungry mouth on Miguel’s chest. He licked the salt off his nipples before shoving his face into his armpit, taking deep whiffs that made him harder. Miguel grabbed his back, pulling him closer and shoved his leg between Robby’s, using his knee to rub his hard-on.

But Robby stopped and moved away.

“We can’t make a mess here.” He said, adjusting his boner. “Carmen will be pissed.”

 _Just call her mom already._ Miguel thought annoyed. But he had a point there.

“Let’s go shower then.” Miguel suggested, grinning. “It’s hot right?”

Why had they never done this before? This felt awesome, being in the shower together, soaping each-other up, running their hands through each-others wet, shampooed hair, gently rubbing the scalp.

Robby was particularly delectable like this, sweat and soap and fresh water giving his skin a flavor Miguel had never tasted before. He sucked down his chest, leaving little red bruises and making Robby throw his head back in ecstasy. They almost slipped a couple of times as Robby’s knees kept giving out every time Miguel’s hand slipped between his legs.

He turned Robby around, under the spray, pulling him close and pushing his cock between his thighs. He held him close like that jerking off his cock as Robby made soft cries of pleasure. Miguel tried something new and pushed his soaped up fingers between the cheeks. His index found Robby’s hole and pushed in, just a little, just the tip, and that’s all it took. Robby was coming, rope after rope of cum spraying onto the bathtub below and swirling down the drain with the water.

Miguel held him there, tightly against him, practically holding him up. He moved his hips, pistoning his cock between Robby’s thighs, still sucking the back of Robby’s neck all the time. He felt Robby’s hands on his ass, pushing him closer, deeper and he came too with a groan.

This was better right? They were saving water? Or were they? They probably ended up spending more time in the shower together than they did individually combined. But this still felt awesome.

Robby didn’t say anything after. But that was okay – he never did. Not even when Miguel made him run back to their room, wet and naked, because they’d only brought one towel with them. Robby was a quiet boy and Miguel loved him for it. And he knew Robby was starting to love him too. And not just crush-love, but actual love. Like really close friends.

Which is why it hurt him so much when Robby didn’t get him a present for his birthday. They got the same allowance and Miguel had gotten him a present, right? So why couldn’t Robby do the same?

He did have an awesome party, with all his friends. From Cobra Kai and others. It wasn’t a kid’s party anymore – with balloons or clowns – but there was still cake and snacks and gifts and games. In fact, Miguel actually didn’t notice that Robby hadn’t gotten him a present until later in the evening. Mostly, he was just annoyed that Robby sat through it in a corner instead of participating with others.

“Are you mad at me?” Robby asked softly, in his scared voice later that night.

 _Yes._ “No.” Miguel said curtly. “It’s not like we are brothers, right? Why should you get me a gift?”

“Sorry.” Robby apologized. “Your birthday’s not over yet. Can I do anything to make it up?”

“Blow me.” Miguel scoffed. _Do what?_ There was nothing Robby could actually do now and Miguel wasn’t going to make him feel better with some empty gesture.

“Okay.” Robby said, getting up.

 _What? Oh…_ Miguel’s eyes widened in the dark.

Was Robby actually going to do it? For real? Jerking each-other off, messing around – that was one thing. But this was different. More personal. If people found out about the rest of it, they’d just shrug it off as boys experimenting. But if they found out about this – Robby’s reputation would be ruined. And he was still going to do it? For Miguel?

How could he not be touched by that?

“Are you sure?” Robby asked, kneeling by his bed and looking up at him. Miguel could barely see him in the dark, but he knew that he had the same scared look on his face.

“Y-yes.” Miguel croaked out, sitting up.

He lifted his hips, letting Robby pull his pajamas and underwear off and then sat back comfortably, letting him lean down between his legs. He was already half-hard from the notion alone and got harder as Robby groped in the dark, trying to find his cock. He felt Robby’s fist close around him and his hot breath tickling his head and he grabbed Robby by his hair, getting ready.

The first lick was warm and hesitant and it made Miguel clench his cheeks. Robby licked around a little, tongue pushing under the foreskin and Miguel grabbed his hair tighter. He sucked at the head like a lollipop before taking more of him into his mouth. Miguel couldn’t stop himself any longer. He pushed Robby’s head down, forcing himself inside until he felt Robby gag around his cock.

It wasn’t a “proper” blowjob – not by any stretch. But it was sloppy and wet and warm in all the right ways. Robby clearly knew enough to keep his teeth out of the way and he stroked Miguel’s cock when he wasn’t sucking it. He also fondled his balls and rubbed his taint with this free hand. But the warm, moist cavern of his mouth felt almost heavenly.

Maybe Miguel shouldn’t have pushed him down like that. The gagging sounds Robby made every time he did didn’t sound comfortable. But it wasn’t for long anyways. Miguel groaned aloud, the only warning he gave of his impending orgasm. He held Robby’s head in place as he emptied spurt after spurt of his jizz down his throat.

Robby looked up after he let go of him, a drop of cum leaking out the corner of his mouth. Miguel wiped it off with his thumb and brought it back to his lips, letting him lick it off.

On instinct, Miguel pulled him up and kissed him. His tongue pushed past Robby’s lips and tasted his own spunk as swirled it around inside his mouth. By the time he ended that kiss, Robby’s like were shining with spit and he looked debauched in the moonlight peeking through the curtains.

“Can you also jerk yourself off?” Miguel asked. “Take off your clothes and just kneel on the floor and jerk off?”

Robby looked scared again. Embarrassed. But Miguel gave him an eager look and he said okay, getting up and stripping off. A few seconds later, Miguel was wiping his crotch and looking at Robby, naked skin shining in moonlight as he furiously jerked his cock.

_Best birthday present ever._


	8. Miguel V

Miguel hadn’t meant to involve Hawk in things. He was best friends with the guy, almost like brothers. Better friends than he was with Robby. But there were things that you didn’t share even with your best friends and his thing with Robby was one of them.

But Hawk was smart and he was spending a lot of time at their place during the summer. They were getting ready for high-school now, which meant they were finally coming out of the kid-phase of their lives. Now, they officially counted as teenagers.

And Hawk picked up on things. Like the butt-slaps and the noogies and the wedgies.

“Is Sensei cool with you messing with Robby like that?” He asked Miguel.

Miguel shrugged. “He says it’s just boys being boys. What’s the big deal? You do it too.”

So Hawk got into it too, kind of picking on Robby whenever he came over. Robby tried to fight back at first, but Hawk was the second-best student in Miguel’s class – after Miguel – and Robby always ended up face-down on the floor, with an arm twisted behind him.

Miguel didn’t actually like that. It always annoyed him to see Hawk act like that and every instinct in him wanted to pull his friend off _his_ Robby. But he thought better of it. After all, he’d started learning karate after getting his ass kicked at school. So if this finally, finally got Robby to see the value, it’d be worth it.

And Robby deserved it too. He was getting some of his old attitude back again. Not in the same way, though.

Miguel had already found weed in his possession and ofcourse he’d told mom and dad. But somehow, the little weasel had convinced Yaya to take the fall for that. Mom and dad were always too easy on him anyways.

Then there was the party night. One of the seniors always held a party before the school started and there were seniors in Cobra Kai. Miguel had angled for an invitation, but they’d just laughed at the notion of a lowly freshman coming to one of their “grown-up” parties.

But Robby had sneaked out anyway, asking Miguel to cover for him. Miguel had felt bad for the guy at first – no doubt they’d just throw him out. But then Johnny came into the room to check in on them and there was no way Miguel could’ve covered for that. In the end, Robby had climbed back through the window to find Johnny waiting for him on the bed.

The shouting match that followed had probably been their most epic one ever. Miguel wasn’t allowed in the room - he waited on the couch with his mother and yaya instead – but he could still hear what was being said every now and then.

“You were drinking? And smoking?” He heard Johnny yell. “Are you trying to ruin your life?”

“You already ruined my life my life when you took me from mom!” Robby yelled back.

It went on and on until Robby got the last shot in.

“Fuck you! You don’t get to ground me. You’ve already made my life miserable.” Miguel heard him say. “I fucking hate you and I fucking hate everyone here! You are not my fucking dad, okay?”

They all heard the slap that followed loud and clear. Carmen rushed into the room, telling Miguel to stay there.

“Johnny, that’s enough.” He heard his mother say angrily.

He peeked inside and saw Robby on the floor, one cheek bright red and a drop of blood making its way down from his cut lip.

Johnny looked horrified. Like he couldn’t believe what had just happened.

“Robby, I’m sorry.” He said, softly stepping forward.

“Stay away from me!” Robby shouted. “All of you, stay away from me!”

Johnny left the room wordlessly and Carmen followed. Miguel slept on the couch that night and none of them talked to Robby for the next few days. And he didn’t talk to them either.

There was no punishment for him, even after all that shit, and the unfairness of it galled at Miguel. If it had been him, pulling a stunt like that… but Robby got away with everything. Miguel would’ve handled it himself, but he could feel that things were on edge somehow. That if any of them pushed Robby wrong, he’d snap and who knew what would happen then.

The most frustrating thing was that Robby’s stunt worked.

Nobody looked at freshmen twice in high-school. That was just how things worked. Even the older kids from Cobra-Kai ignored Miguel and his friends. Except, that didn’t seem to apply to Robby. Somehow, he was kind of popular. Even the football players gave him an approving “What’s up, Keene?” when they passed him in the hallways.

Miguel’s eyes almost fell out of his head when he saw The Katie Nelson talking to Robby at his lockers. Yes, _that_ Katie Nelson. The head cheer-leader and probably the nicest and most popular girl in high-school.

“Dude, how do you know the Katie Nelson?” Miguel asked in amazement after she left.

“I don’t. We just met.” Robby shrugged. “She said she was on the welcoming committee.”

_Then why the hell isn’t she welcoming me?_

“You know that cheerleaders don’t talk to freshmen for no reason, right?” Miguel said.

“She said she was friends with Tilly.” Robby replied. “And Tilly knows me from the skate-park.”

Okay, that made some sense. Miguel had kind of seen Tilly around since she lived a few blocks over, but he’d never actually met her. But he’d heard about her. She was this cool skater chick and rumor was, she’d hook-up with anybody. Though Miguel doubted she’d stoop as low as a freshman. But Robby knew her from the skate-park and she was friends with Katie…

No, it still didn’t make sense. The guys from Cobra-Kai were Miguel’s actual, close friends and even they didn’t give him the time of the day when they were at school.

“I don’t know what to tell you.” Robby said. “She came to talk to me. You wanna know why? Ask her.”

It was the party. It had to be. Robby had gone there and that alone had been enough to impress all those stupid seniors.

“That can’t be it.” Hawk said. “I went to that party and no one paid any attention to me.”

What the hell? Was Miguel the only one who’d stayed home that night?

“It wasn’t that great.” Hawk told him. “I saw Robby there. He wasn’t talking to anyone either. And there were other freshmen there too. Everyone just ignored us.”

So if wasn’t the party then what was it?

It was his attitude, right? That was the only other possibility.

Miguel thought of himself as pretty cool but he was still kind of a dork. Especially when talking to someone he wanted to impress. He always ended up tripping over his words and saying something stupid and girls he talked to ended up rolling their eyes and walking away without another word. Hawk was the same, except he came on a little too aggressive.

But Robby was different. Miguel could see that. He was shy and tongue-tied, but for some reason, people mistook that for indifference. For boredom. As if he didn’t care about being their friend. And paradoxically, it made them want to be friends with him even more – even the stupid older kids who should know better. He still didn’t have any close friends, ofcourse, but he had this cool loner vibe going that people seemed to find interesting.

And Miguel could not let this happen. He would not let this happen.

Miguel was better than Robby at everything. He had to be. He was the big brother, even though Robby was few months older. He got better grades. He was taller and stronger. He was more athletic. He had more actual friends. So he couldn’t let Robby beat him at being popular.

If things went on like this, Robby would end up with a girlfriend and losing his virginity before Miguel. Yes, he knew they did sex-stuff together, but that didn’t count because you couldn’t tell people about it. What he really needed was a girlfriend so that they could start making out right away and he could punch in his V-card in a few months. A year, tops. Losing his virginity at fourteen would make him a fucking legend of high-school.

And it’d make Johnny proud. He never said it in so many words, but he was always talking about his own high-school years and how much of a player he’d been. And he’d always approved of Miguel hitting on girls – even given him a few tips on how to do it. He’d definitely be impressed by whichever one of them scored first and Miguel was determined it’d be him.

Tory was the girl for him, he decided. She was hot and she was into martial-arts and she was kind of badass. She liked Miguel’s dorky charm. And people also said that she was kind of easy – but that was a total lie. She was just chill and she liked boys, but she wouldn’t let them take advantage of her. Miguel really liked her and she liked him and they got along really well.

As for Robby, well, Hawk was already taking care of that particular problem. No one could be a cool loner and a pussy at the same time. And Hawk was hell-bent on proving that Robby was the latter. He shoved him against the lockers in between periods, pushed him to the floor. This one time, he actually pantsed him in gym class. Everyone got a good look at Robby’s pale ass framed by his jockstrap and they all roared in laughter before Robby bull-rushed Hawk and got in a few punches before coach separated them.

* * *

Things did cross a line that day, though. Even Miguel could admit to that much.

“Why is your brother such an ass to you?” Hawk asked, plopping down onto the bed.

Miguel looked up at Robby in the next bed, reading his book. The three of them were alone in the house that Saturday.

“He’s not my brother.” Miguel replied. “And he loves me.”

Robby scoffed from his bed, without looking up.

“Sure. I can just feel the love.” Hawk laughed.

Miguel was annoyed now. He was already feeling cranky since Tory had told him that she couldn’t hang out with him that weekend and he didn’t feel like being made fun of by either of those two.

“He has a crush on me, actually.” Miguel said, glaring at Robby. “That’s why he acts like an ass. To hide it.”

Miguel could see Robby go red in the face, but Hawk didn’t notice. He laughed derisively, clearly thinking of it as a joke.

“That true Robby?” Hawk asked, eyes fixed on Miguel. “You got a crush on your bro? A bro-crush? A brush?”

Robby still didn’t look up, but he replied anyway. “Miguel’s just desperate to get off. He’ll believe anything to stroke his ‘ego’.”

Hawk fell back, chuckling and Miguel was pissed off now. He couldn’t let these two gang up on him. He got off his bed angrily and stormed up to Robby’s.

“So you don’t have a crush on me?” He asked as Robby looked up at him, suddenly scared. “Wanna prove that?”

The following tussle was embarrassingly short. Miguel slapped aside the book Robby threw at him and jumped on top of him. Robby still had no chance against him and Miguel soon had him in a schoolboy pin with his arms trapped under Miguel’s leg.

“Dude, he’s such a pussy.” Miguel heard Hawk laugh out and ignored him.

“Still don’t like me?” Miguel said, running his thumb over Robby’s lips. “What if I do this?” He slid his hand under the tank-top from the side and played with Robby’s nipple.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Hawk asked, sounding weird.

“Proving a point.” Miguel replied, giving a twist that made Robby gasp. “He always gets hard when I do this to him.”

“You are shitting me, right?” Hawk sounded excited.

“Check for yourself.” Miguel replied.

He saw Robby’s mouth open and his eyes go wide and he smirked down at him. It was Robby’s fault – he shouldn’t have acted like an ass. And it was going to be fine. Hawk was his best friend and he was a great guy. And they were all guys here. He’d felt Hawk hard against him and vice-versa plenty of times during sparring.

Miguel heard the sound of a zipper being undone and pressed down as Robby started struggling to move. But between Miguel and Hawk, he had no chance and soon Miguel heard a rustle of clothes being removed.

“That’s his hard-on?” He heard Hawk laugh behind him. “It’s so small.”

Miguel turned around, confused. Robby was still flaccid. He’d filled up a little but it was still far from the throbbing tool that Miguel was used to feeling against him. He looked at Robby’s pleading face and got off him.

 _Maybe he’s just not in the mood today._ Miguel thought. _And on a day that I need him to prove something?_

“So, prove your point yet?” Hawk smirked at him and that sent Miguel over the edge.

Robby was up, reaching for his underwear when Miguel grabbed him again. This time, he pulled his shirt off too, leaving the teen naked between two friends, before wrapping his arms around him from behind. Miguel pulled Robby flush against his chest and he could see his dick twitching already.

“Miguel please - ” Robby started, not resisting.

“Shush.” Miguel shut him up. It was fine, he’d take his clothes off too in a moment. “Watch this.” He told Hawk.

Hawk watched in wonder as Miguel’s hands roamed around Robby’s body – pinching his nipples, stroking his abs, rubbing between his thighs. Miguel kept it up until Robby’s cock filled up completely and was standing straight, pointing to Hawk.

“Holy shit, dude! He is a horny little slut for you.” Hawk said in amazement. “What a freak!?”

“Don’t call him that.” Miguel snapped. “He’s not a freak, okay. He just has a crush on me.”

He felt Robby lean back into him at that. As Hawk reached out to touch him, Robby turned his face trying to hide it in the crook of Miguel’s arm. Hawk grabbed Robby’s legs and pulled him down a little before experimentally stroking his cock.

“So he’s a fag?” Hawk asked and Miguel let Robby hide his face in his chest.

“I told you, it’s just a crush.” Miguel insisted. “He’s not a - ” _Is he though?_

Being around someone like Johnny, the idea of being straight felt so obvious that the thought hadn’t even occurred to Miguel. Sure they messed around, but Miguel knew that eventually they’d both get girlfriends and stop. Atleast he knew he would. But if Robby was gay…

That would explain a lot. Especially why he acted like that around Johnny and why he wouldn’t join Cobra Kai. Johnny was such a man’s man that it would make total sense for Robby to be afraid of telling him the truth. And ashamed of him finding out the truth even accidentally. But that was stupid. Miguel knew that Johnny would never…

Would he though? For the first time, Miguel found himself a little uncertain about his dad/sensei’s reaction. Johnny was kind of old-school. Like his no-girls rule for Cobra Kai and him mocking all the social justice stuff. And he had called them fairies once, but that was different, right? Those guys were wearing wings, for fuck’s sake? Would Johnny actually reject Robby if he found out?

“Not a fag.” Robby muttered into Miguel’s chest.

“This says different.” Hawk smirked, tugging his cock.

“Leave him alone.” Miguel said, slapping his hand away. He’d proven his point and he was ready for it to be over.

“I know how we can make sure.” Hawk suggested, his face brightening up. “Fags like butt-stuff, right? Does he like butt-stuff?”

Miguel hesitated. Robby had enjoyed Miguel touching him down there and he had cum really hard when he’d pushed the finger in. But should he be telling Hawk that?

“I don’t know.” Miguel said.

Hawk smirked. “Let’s find out.”

Before Miguel could stop him, Hawk had his hand shoved down between Robby’s legs, long fingers exploring in there. One brushed against his hole making his gasp and his cock spurt out a little pre-cum.

Miguel was about to put an end to this but Robby’s reaction got him curious again. And they could just confirm it once and for all. It’d be fine – he’d keep Robby’s secret. Even from Johnny and Carmen. And he’d him that it was okay and that they’d figure it out together.

Hawk pushed in, to a knuckle and Robby gasped and squirmed in Miguel’s arms. He sounded uncomfortable, but his dick was still hard and drooling. _So maybe it is true._

“Man, what do you think Sensei would do if he found out that his son was a fag?” Hawk asked. “You think he’ll kill him or just throw him out?”

Miguel felt Robby sob against him and his temper rose. Did Hawk have no filter at all?

“He won’t do anything. And he’s not gonna find out.” Miguel snapped, grabbing Hawk’s wrist and pulling him out of Robby. “That’s enough, alright?

Miguel put his own hand between Robby’s cheeks, rubbing him comfortingly, which make his cock twitch harder. But Hawk was on a roll and he wouldn’t stop asking questions.

“Does he suck too?” He asked. “He has the lips for it.”

Miguel hesitated. Robby had sucked him off. More than once. And he had offered it himself the first time. He did like doing it – he always got hard when he sucked Miguel off. And Hawk was already pawing his bulge through his shorts.

“I’ve never had a blowjob before.” Hawk said, hinting eagerly.

This could be a way to make the afternoon better. It was something Robby liked. Hawk would have to get naked for this and Miguel would too. And Robby would see there was nothing to be ashamed about here. He’d be more comfortable.

“He’s great at it.” Miguel said, proudly. “Aren’t you Robby?”

Robby sniffed against his chest and pushed away with a resigned look on his face. _There’s my boy,_ Miguel thought. Robby always acted like that – like he didn’t care – but he never said no.

Miguel took his shirt off and Hawk looked at him non-plussed.

“Dude, what…?”

“He can’t blow us if we are wearing clothes, dumbass.” Miguel explained.

Hawk looked dumbfounded for a moment and Miguel was surprised. _It was your idea._ He took off his shirt, hesitating at first, but then looked and Robby and practically jumped out of his shorts and briefs. Miguel finished undressing too and stood beside his best friend, comparing himself.

They all looked around the same size to Miguel. Maybe Miguel had an advantage in length or maybe that was just his foreskin giving that impression. Both Robby and Hawk were cut and Miguel could see that Robby was the thickest of the three while Hawk was the thinnest. His cock also bent a little downward, making judging the size difficult.

They stood side by side, their cocks in Robby’s face as he stared at them apprehensively. He leaned down, licking Miguel’s head first before turning to swipe his tongue along Hawk’s. Hawk shuddered as the moist heat enveloped him for a moment and made a disappointed noise as it left him for Miguel.

Robby alternated between them, blowing one while jerking the other, before Hawk got impatient and forced him to take both of them simultaneously. He put one arm around Miguel’s shoulder and used the other to force Robby to take them deeper. This was clearly Hawk’s first time because unlike Miguel, he had his head thrown back, moaning in ecstasy. Hawk’s cock, rubbing against his, inside Robby’s mouth – that was a completely new sensation. 

But something was wrong here. It didn’t feel as good to Miguel this time. He didn’t like seeing Robby’s lips stretched wide around the two of them - it looked uncomfortable. He didn’t like how Hawk kept forcing Robby to take them, saying “Yeah, bitch!” every now and then. He didn’t like how there wasn’t enough suction since there were two of them and Robby obviously couldn’t seal his lips around both cocks at once. And he certainly didn’t like it when Hawk’s hand moved down his back and dipped into the cleft between his cheeks.

Miguel pulled out and stepped away, still stroking himself but leaving Robby to Hawk. He saw Hawk look at him in askance.

“It’s better one-on-one.” Miguel explained. “And I wanna try something else.”

Robby paused too, looking at him scared as he got the lube before Hawk slapped his attention back to him. Miguel got on the bed, lounging back before pulling Robby’s ass towards him. He had thought of it before, even read up on it a little. He knew you needed lots of lube for this and you had to go easy. And Hawk was right – this was some gay-stuff, so if Robby really liked it, then was probably gay.

He spread Robby’s legs apart so that he wouldn’t need to keep pulling the cheeks. Then he drizzled some lube on his crack, watching it slide down as he stroked himself. He caught it with his finger as it reached the hole, circling it gently until he felt Robby loosen.

Miguel pushed in a tentative finger and heard Robby suck harder at Hawk’s cock. Hawk was grinning down at Miguel approvingly, so he pushed in deeper, almost two knuckles. Robby was breathing hard, squeezing his butt as if trying to force it out and Miguel wondered how that clenched heat would feel around his cock. He turned his finger around, exploring the silky channel and Robby moaned around Hawk’s cock when it brushed against something.

“Do that again.” Hawk said. “Make him do that again.”

 _What was that?_ Miguel had felt Robby give a full body shudder as well. That ripple that had made all his muscles stand out. Miguel dug around, trying to find that spot again and he saw by Robby’s reaction that he had. It felt like a small bump on the inside.

“Shit, shit, shit!” Hawk moaned, grabbing Robby’s hair and pushing himself deeper.

Miguel knew what to do now – he poured some more lube and pushed another finger in, stretching and scissoring them and rubbing the pads on that spot, making Robby moan and shudder each time. _That’s so hot,_ he thought as he jerked himself off almost in a frenzy.

Miguel came first, as he’d intended, the whole load landing on his chest and abs, before dribbling onto his pubes. He reached under Robby with his now free hand and started jerking him off as well, using his cum as lubrication. Two fingers stayed inside Robby’s ass, pushing in and out and practically jabbing that spot inside him.

Hawk grunted loudly, pulling himself out and pointing his cock right at Robby’s face. Cum sprayed out, landing on Robby’s hair, face, cheeks and chest. Hawk looked down appreciatively at his handiwork after he was done, smearing some on Robby’s wet lips.

 _Asshole,_ Miguel thought before pulling Robby back towards him and continuing his dual ministrations. Between the fingers in his ass making him tremble and the hand jerking him off in a blur, Robby was soon spilling himself, emptying himself over his chest and abs.

They all stood back, panting, trying to catch their breaths and watching Hawk’s and Robby’s cum slide down his body and mixing together.

“That’s enough, right?” Robby asked, kind of sullen. “We are done for today?”

“Dude, don’ be a bitch.” Hawk said. “You loved it.”

_Why does Robby always have to be this way? Can’t he just, for once, be honest and say that he enjoyed it?_

“Just go wash up.” Miguel snapped.


	9. Miguel VI

Bringing Hawk into this was a mistake after all. Ofcourse he wouldn’t tell people what happened – Miguel made sure of that upon the pain of death – but that didn’t stop him from spreading rumors about Robby. And sure enough, soon the other guys from Cobra Kai were messing with him too.

It really pissed Miguel off – watching them push him like that. Watching them tease him by pushing a hand under his shirt and pinching him. And it wasn’t about making him less popular either. If anything, that somehow ended up making him more popular.

But it did affect him. Miguel could tell when he woke up one night to the sound of Robby moaning in his sleep before jerking awake. _A nightmare,_ Miguel figured as he heard him sniffing softly. He got up and went over to Robby’s bed, lying down behind him and spooning him against his chest.

“Please go away.” Robby pleaded quietly, almost crying. “I can’t right now.”

“I’m just trying to comfort you. You had a nightmare, right?” Miguel said, rubbing circles over his stomach. “I do care about you, you know?”

“If you cared you wouldn’t have said anything to Hawk.” Robby said, sullenly.

Miguel felt his guilt rise over that. He just had to prove a point, didn’t he? No matter how it affected Robby. He whispered out a sorry and held him closer until they both fell asleep.

Miguel talked to Hawk the next day, confronting him and some of the others in the park.

“You are gonna leave my brother alone from now on.” He said, sternly.

“Thought he wasn’t your brother.” Hawk smirked back.

“Whatever.” Miguel snapped. “Just stop hassling him.”

“What are you getting so bent out of shape for?” Hawk scoffed. “He’s a pussy and a fag - ”

Miguel grabbed him by his shirt and slammed him against the tree.

“You want me to kick your ass over this?” He threatened. “You’re gonna stop talking about him, you are gonna stop spreading stories about him and you are gonna stop bullying him. Got it?”

Hawk looked more concerned than afraid. “Dude, what’s going on?”

Miguel sighed in frustration. _How does this guy not get it?_

“What do you think my dad’s gonna do if he finds out what’s been going on?” He tried another angle. “He’ll kick the whole lot of you out of the dojo and then he’ll kick my ass for not protecting Robby.”

Hawk shook his head, scared. “Sensei would never do that.”

“You wanna bet on it?” Miguel asked. “Because I don’t. If I ever see you mess with him again, I WILL kick your ass. Got it?”

Hawk nodded sullenly and others murmured in agreement.

“Understood.” Hawk said, firmly.

_That’s one thing taken care of._

* * *

Things with Tory were great. Better than great – they were awesome. They weren’t having sex yet. They were months away from that stage. They were still on making out all the time phase of their relationship, with the occasional under the shirt action. And Miguel wasn’t in any hurry. Now that he knew that Robby was gay, he figured he could take his time and do this right. Tory did always get him all riled up and horny, but he had Robby to take care of that afterwards.

It wasn’t cheating, Miguel told himself. He stopped kissing Robby on the lips and guys helping each-other out had no effect on his relationship with Tory. And he did spend a lot of time with her – so much so that even his mom and dad took notice. Sure, he insisted to them that Tory was "just a friend", but the way they both smirked knowingly at that told him that he wasn't fooling anybody. 

Tory was different from Robby in so many ways. Soft and smooth under his fingers while Robby was all hard muscles. She laughed and played around a lot, while Robby was always sullen and moody. And most of all, she was honest – she liked Miguel, she liked spending time with him, she liked it when he touched her. And Robby would always pretend that he was being forced to do this stuff.

So if he wanted to act like that, he shouldn’t have had a problem with Miguel spending time with Tory, right?

“It’s my room too.” Robby said, when Miguel told him to get out. “Go play tonsil hockey with your girlfriend somewhere else.”

Miguel growled and grabbed Robby by the collar, marching to the door and throwing him out, before locking it.

“So, your brother’s an ass.” Tory said, lounging on his bed.

“He’s not my brother.” Miguel replied. But he didn’t want to spend the afternoon taking about Robby.

Nothing was going to happen today. They were just getting more comfortable around each-other. Getting to know each other more intimately. Sure they both had their shirts off, but Tory was still wearing her bra. All they had scheduled for that afternoon was lying on the bed, making out for hours while running their hands all over each-other.

That was before they were interrupted by a loud knock on the door.

“Honey, you in there?” Carmen said, a little too loudly. “Can you open the door?”

 _Shit. Mom? She is not supposed to be back yet._ They hurriedly put on their shirts before Miguel opened the door just a crack. Carmen was there, breathing heavily and sweating like she’d just come back from a run.

“Mom? You are supposed to be at work.” Miguel said, dumbfounded.

“I took the day off to spend some time with you boys.” She said, a little too casually, before pushing her way into the room. “Oh – I see you have Tory over?”

“Hi, Mrs. Diaz.” Tory said, awkwardly shuffling on her feet.

“Well, you can come with us too.” Carmen offered, smiling.

“Dude, your shirt’s inside out.” Robby said, smirking from the doorway. “And Tory, you missed a button.”

Both of them flushed red with embarrassment as Carmen tried to hide her smile. _That asshole. He narced on me, didn’t he? He told mom I had a girl over and made her rush back home. Oh, he’s so gonna get it later._

“How about I walk Tory home?” Robby suggested. “And you can spend some quality time with Miguel.”

“That’s such a nice offer.” Carmen said, approvingly.

“Thanks, but I can find my way to my own home.” Tory refused, staring daggers at Robby.

“It’s no problem, really.” Robby insisted.

Miguel considered it. On one hand, he didn’t want to put Tory through more of Robby. On the other hand, he definitely did not want Robby to witness the humiliating lecture that was no doubt coming to him.

“You should let him.” Miguel said. “Safer that way.”

“Yes, Robby is a real gentleman.” Carmen added.

Tory huffed and stormed out, with Robby running after her. Carmen stopped smiling as soon as they were gone and Miguel closed his eyes, waiting for the inevitable.

* * *

Johnny couldn’t stop laughing. This shit was just too funny.

“It’s not funny.” Carmen insisted. “And you need to talk to him.”

“He’s a fourteen year old boy in love.” Johnny replied. “Talking is not what he is after.”

Carmen glared at him angrily. “He’s too young. I don’t want to embarrass him anymore. So you have to handle it. Tell him it’s not okay.”

“But it _is_ okay.” Johnny said. “This is part of growing up. You don’t want him to be a loser do you?”

“Do you want to be a grandad already?” Carmen snapped.

“I already had the sex-talk with him.” Johnny replied. “He knows all about using protection.”

“Dammit, Johnny. There is more to having sex than using protection and you know it. Especially at his age.” Carmen almost shouted. "Look - boys are all pent-up hormones and confusion at this age. They pretend, but the truth is, they have no idea what they are doing and when the moment comes, they won't have any control either. I don't want Miguel to make a mistake that he'll regret later. Or worse, something that'll haunt him for the rest of his life."

“Alright. Alright.” Johnny surrendered. “I’ll talk to him.”

“And Robby too.” Carmen added quietly. “He’s a well-behaved kid. He really is. But sometimes… he acts out of anger. You don’t want him to make a mistake.”

Johnny hesitated at that. They were talking again, but things were definitely not okay between them. “He still hasn’t forgiven me.” He said, ashamed. “For… what happened.”

“He’s still your son.” Carmen said. “His needs come first, no matter what.”

Johnny nodded. _Time for another camping trip._ And maybe, this might just be the thing to fix things with Robby.

* * *

Miguel knew this was coming. He knew exactly what this trip was about. It didn’t matter anymore though. He could’ve told them that if they’d bothered to ask.

Tory had broken up with him the very next day.

“Your mom called my mom and told her how she found us.” She told Miguel. “And now, I can’t see you anymore.”

“C’mon.” Miguel pleaded. “You always do what your mom tells you?”

Tory’s eyes flashed in anger. “My mom does a lot for me and my brother. And she never asks for anything in return.” She told him. “So yeah, when she does ask, I do what she tells me to.”

It was all Robby’s fault, Miguel decided. None of this would’ve happened had he not ratted him out to Carmen. And Miguel almost did let him have it for that.

“I don’t care who you sleep with.” Robby said, almost crying as Miguel pinned him down and yanked his boxers down. “It’s my room too and you can’t just kick me out whenever you want.”

 _He is jealous_ , Miguel realized then and stopped before the first slap fell. Ofcourse he was jealous. He had a crush on Miguel and Miguel was getting together with another girl. Or maybe it was because Miguel had a girlfriend he could’ve slept with while Robby didn’t have that option. Either way, he was jealous and that’s why he’d sabotaged them.

Miguel felt bad for him then and didn’t hit him. Just let him off with a threat. And then he was actually nice to him – fingering him and getting him off that night.

But there was no avoiding this camping trip, however. And this time, Robby was coming with them. Miguel expected it to be doubly humiliating based on that fact alone.

Except, it wasn’t. This one was actually very different. A lot less talk about embarrassing body parts and a lot more about girls. In fact, it was almost all about girls – what they wanted, how they liked their guys, how to woo them, how to treat them right, how not to pressure them into anything, how to know when they are ready and so on.

Ofcourse, Robby didn’t participate much. Miguel didn’t expect him to, since he wasn’t actually interested in girls. And Miguel covered for him by asking a dozen questions per minute so that Johnny wouldn’t notice his silence.

“It’s all about showing them that you appreciate them.” Johnny told them. “Robby, pay attention - this is important. You don’t want the girls to feel like you only want them for sex.”

“What if she only wants to you for sex?” Robby asked, speaking up for the first time.

_Haven’t you been listening? Girls like that don’t exist._

“Girls sometimes say stuff like that, but believe me, they always want more.” Johnny explained.

“But what if it is just that?” Robby insisted. “What if she has a boyfriend or whatever and she just wants you for one night?”

Johnny laughed. “Then you thank your God and have the night of your life.” He got serious again. “But you still have to treat her right, okay? Show her you appreciate her by buying her dinner or taking her on a date.”

“Or by going down on her?” Robby asked, curious.

Johnny was suddenly awkward by the explicit nature of the talk. “S-Sure.” He said, hesitating. “If that’s what she is into.”

Robby nodded, satisfied and went back to staring at the fire. But Miguel was annoyed now. Why the hell was he talking about stuff he knew nothing about?

“Dude, just listen to dad, okay?” Miguel said. “Neither of us has been with a girl before and he knows what he is talking about.”

“No. Just you.” Robby said softly.

“What?” Miguel asked frowning.

“Nothing.” Robby shrugged.

_Is he implying…? C’mon._

“Are you saying you’ve been with a girl before?” Johnny asked, confused.

Robby shrugged.

 _Is he for real?_ Miguel scoffed. “Bullshit. I know for a fact you never had a girlfriend.”

“I was talking about having sex. Not having a girlfriend.” Robby explained quietly.

That was just trying to use technicalities and Miguel wouldn’t let him.

“So you are saying you’ve had sex with a girl?” Miguel clarified and Robby nodded. “Who? Who is this girl who just had to hook-up with you?”

“Tilly.” Robby replied.

 _Oh, he’s good._ Robby had chosen a girl he had some tenuous connection with from the skate-park and one who was known to be kind of a slut. It was almost believable, if it hadn’t been Robby they were talking about.

“Who’s Tilly?” Johnny asked perplexed.

“She lives a few blocks over.” Miguel explained. “She is three years older than us and she is way out of Robby’s league. She’s like, one of the hottest chicks at school, she already has a boyfriend and she is a junior.”

Johnny understood. He got it right away and he gave Robby a sad exasperated look.

“Robby, you shouldn’t make stuff up about people like that.” Johnny said.

“You think I’m lying?” Robby asked, looking at them angrily.

“I’m just saying – this isn’t a competition.” Johnny explained. “It doesn’t matter if Miguel is ahead. Let things happen in their own time.”

Robby glared at him. “I’m not lying.” He said, firmly.

 _Is this about his secret?_ Miguel wondered. _Is he so desperate to convince dad that he is straight that he’d make shit up?_ Miguel could actually understand that. But then he’d have gone for someone more believable.

“Think about the girl’s reputation, Robby.” Johnny tried again. “What would she think if she hears you telling these stories about her?”

“Tilly wouldn’t care.” Robby shrugged angrily.

“Dude enough.” Miguel stepped in. “No one’s buying your bullshit, okay? Let it go.”

Robby huffed and looked at the fire again and for a moment, Miguel was glad that it was over. But then he fished out his phone and started scrolling through it.

“There.” He said, handing it to Johnny. “Believe me now?”

Miguel saw Johnny look at the phone and his jaw drop open. Curious he took a peek as well and his own eyes widened with shock.

It was a selfie of Robby… and Tilly. That was definitely Tilly. Robby was half-hidden behind her, clearly shirtless, with one arm around her chest, covering her very naked breasts and the other disappearing downwards, below the frame. And there could be no doubt where that hand was. Robby’s face was buried in her hair, his teeth biting her earlobe and Tilly was staring right at the camera with a blissful look on her face.

“You hooked up with Tilly?” Miguel said, stunned. There was no denying it now. “But you’re…”

“What?” Robby scoffed. “Too much of a loser to get someone like that?”

_Yes, that too. But…_

“Robby you shouldn’t take pictures of girls like this.” Johnny said, numbly.

“I didn’t.” Robby replied. “She did.”

That was true enough. Both of Robby’s hands were accounted for and it was clearly Tilly’s arm holding the phone.

“Still.” Johnny insisted. “How do you think she’d feel knowing you are showing this to people?”

“She told me to.” Robby shrugged. “She said if people don’t believe me, I can show it to them.”

“Dude.” Miguel cut in. “This isn’t something you brag about.”

“I didn’t. You asked.” Robby replied. “This is the first time I’ve told anyone.”

“First time?” Johnny was breathing hard. “When did this happen?”

“At the start of the school party.” Robby replied. “The one where I got drunk and high.”

That explained so much. Why Robby was so popular all of a sudden. A freshman scoring with a junior, let alone someone like Tilly – that was unheard of.

And it really made Miguel feel like an idiot. He’d thought that he was competing with Robby, that he had a chance at winning this race. Except, Robby had won way before Miguel had even started running. He had expected he’d be a legend if he punched in his V-card in his first year. But Robby had done that before the year even started and that was beyond legendary.

“Okay.” Johnny was nodding to himself, rubbing his forehead. “Right. Forget everything I just said. You guys are too young for all this. Too young for dating and definitely too young for sex.”

Miguel looked at him, confused. _What’s going on?_ “But you said…”

“Forget what I said.” Johnny repeated. “We have new rules now. No more dating until you are seniors.”

“I didn’t date Tilly.” Robby pointed out.

“And no more hooking-up with girls either.” Johnny finished. “C’mon. Let’s pack up. We are going home.”

“I thought we were gonna camp out.” Miguel said. “It’s already night.”

“I changed my mind. We are going home.” Johnny said firmly.

Miguel glared at Robby angrily. _We were having such a good time. Why did you have to go ahead and ruin it?_

* * *

He was a fool. He was such a fool. Johnny couldn’t believe how blind he’d been. Carmen had been right all along.

He should be proud, right? Robby had done what every teenage boy dreamed about – scored with a hot, older chick way more experienced than him. And gotten the evidence to prove it. And in a no-strings attached, one-night stand at that. That was something every guy dreamed of. Johnny had always thought he’d be proud if one of his boys pulled something like that.

But now all he felt was fear. Indescribable, unfathomable fear.

It was the concrete evidence of it all. It was one thing to think about these things in the abstract, but seeing the actual evidence – that had made Johnny’s stomach drop. One by one, all the horror stories about risks and pitfalls had come rushing to his mind.

Robby was too young. Way too young. Anything could’ve happened here. Someone could’ve gotten him drunk and taken advantage of him. Or there could’ve been a mistake that would’ve ruined his life. Or he could’ve caught some horrible disease. Even if he’d protected himself from all there, sex was more complicated than that. The emotions involved, the heartbreak – Robby was too young to go through all that.

And Johnny had pushed him there. He’d pushed them both with his talk about hot chicks and how to score with them. But there was a lot more to it and he’d never prepared them for that. Carmen was right all along.

He’d failed Robby. Again. It was his job to prepare him, to make sure he lost his virginity the right way at the right time and he’d failed him completely. He’d do better with Miguel, he was determined about that, but when it came to Robby, it was just one failure after another.

And who the fuck was this Tilly who’d taken advantage of his son?


	10. Robby IV

Matilda Tillman. Tilda. Tilly. Ms. T.

What a stupid name for a girl like that, right? She should’ve a badass name like Xena or Buffy or Daenerys. Okay, maybe that was too much, but she still deserved better from her parents. That’s what Robby thought anyway.

He first saw Tilly when he moved in with Johnny and started going to the local skatepark – a bigger and better one than before. He’d been surprised at first. A girl? Skateboarding? That had to be a joke, right?

“Wanna put your money where your mouth is?” Tilly asked, scornfully. “C’mon – you and me – wipeout race. Right now.”

Everyone hooted and laughed while Robby looked at her in confusion.

“We do a circuit of the park with all the basic moves.” She explained. “Whoever finishes first wins. Unless you wipeout. Then you lose.”

He didn’t like it – the way this girl talked to him. All smug and superior. He was good at skateboarding and it didn’t matter that she was older – he wanted to beat her. He was going to beat her.

He lasted about twenty seconds before wiping out spectacularly. Somehow he kept himself from flushing with embarrassment as all the onlookers roared with laughter at him. Tilly gave up too about halfway through – she’d already won, after all – and rolled back, skating circles around him.

“Not bad, kid. Better than half these bozos their first time.” She smirked down at him. “Still think a girl can’t skate?”

Robby dusted himself off as he got up. She was good, he’d have to give her that. But he wasn’t going to admit to being wrong. Not when everyone was already laughing at him.

“What are you guys laughing at?” Tilly turned around, yelling at them. “Think any of you can do better? Let’s go then. Tam?”

Tam shook his head and the others demurred as well. Apparently, Tilly wasn’t just good, she was the best one there.

“Pussies, the whole bunch of ya'.” Tilly scoffed derisively. “Bunch of tough boys and I’m the only one with a dick around here.”

“Really?” Robby said, surprised. That might explain it. He looked down for confirmation, but her big cargos didn’t actually tell him anything one way or the other.

He got a dope-slap on the back of his head for that.

“Not literally, you asshole.” Tilly said indignantly as the guys broke out in laughter again. And this time, Robby did flush at being late to the joke.

* * *

They weren’t friends. Tilly was way out of his league for even that. She was planning on going pro, Robby learned, and she definitely had the skills for it. And she was popular at school too – not like a mean-girl popular, but like that girl everyone liked but were still afraid of.

They weren’t friends, but she did acknowledge Robby’s existence every time he came to the skate-park to practice. He even managed to get her approval with a couple of tricks and she gave him some tips on improving his techniques. A few times, he even raced with her and her friends. He was pretty good, he learned. He’d thought that already, but now he knew for sure that he was better than most of the guys there. But Tilly was leagues beyond any of them.

That was kind of why he dared to talk to her at the party.

The start-of-the-school party itself was pretty boring. Robby had been nervous about crashing – afraid that some of the big seniors might physically throw him out. But no one looked at him twice. They were all too busy talking to each-other, shouting and drinking. No one seemed to care when Robby poured himself a beer from the keg. Or when he took the second one.

Maybe it’d have been more fun had Robby known anyone there. He did see a few guys from Cobra-Kai – clearly identified by their Cobra-Kai t-shirts. Exactly like the one Miguel had given him and he’d never worn. But those guys weren’t even talking to Hawk, no matter how hard he tried.

Robby had noticed Hawk almost right away – that unmistakable blue mohawk sticking out like a sore thumb. He didn’t like the guy, but Robby considered putting up with him for one night. That was before the guy started making a spectacle of himself by hitting on every girl within his ten-foot radius. His clumsy attempts at impressing them were painfully embarrassing to watch. That couldn’t be what Johnny taught them at the dojo, right? Robby didn’t want to be anywhere near that disaster.

He saw Tilly when he was sneaking out of the party. She was outside by the hedge, all alone and smoking a joint. Normally, he would’ve just slunk away, but the beer buzz just made him bold enough to go over and say hello.

“Who invited you to the party?” Tilly smirked down at him.

“You did. Don’t you remember?” Robby lied blatantly.

Tilly laughed out loud and offered him the blunt. Robby took it and took aneasy drag, doing his best to look nonchalant under her watchful eye. He knew it was a test of sorts -to see if he’d be too chicken to take it or if he was acting cooler than he was and ended up coughing it all out. But this wasn’t his first rodeo.

It was their little secret – his and Rosa’s. Robby had found a few joints hidden in cupboard after they’d switched rooms and Rosa had caught him trying one out in the backyard. That would’ve been mutually assured destruction – with Robby getting in trouble for trying weed and Rosa getting in trouble for bringing it in the house in the first place. So they’d kept quiet about it.

And Rosa had even let him try it a couple of times. She didn’t encourage this behavior – she’d made that very clear. But she saw no harm in letting Robby have a few drags every now and then. Especially since Robby found her a new dealer in the neighborhood. Skaters and stoners kinda went together and there was bound to be someone in the skate-park who knew someone who knew a dealer.

Ofcourse, Miguel had put an end to all that when he’d found the weed Robby had been holding for Rosa. But even so, Robby had enough experience not to embarrass himself like a noob. It was good enough for Tilly to start talking to him for real instead of shooing him away.

“Your eyes are really pretty.” Robby said after a while, smiling. He must be really high, he thought. He’d have never said anything dorky like that otherwise.

“Hey! My boobs are down here.” Tilly replied laughing and snapping her fingers in front of his eyes.

Robby kept smiling and staring at her face.

“Most guys would’ve tried to kiss me by now.” Tilly said, looking at him closely. “You wanna hit on me, better up your game.”

“I’m not hitting on you.” Robby replied. He must be high. Why else would he be talking like that? So honestly. “I don't hit on girls I don't have a chance with.”

Tilly laughed at that, hitting him on the arm and make him stumble a little.

“Ever been with a girl before?” She asked him and he shook his head. “What about a guy?”

Robby almost shook his head again, but stopped himself. That stuff with Miguel, it counted, right?

“I don’t know.” He said, quietly.

“You don’t know if you’ve been with a guy before?” Tilly asked skeptically.

“I don’t know if it counts.” Robby explained. “We just kinda messed around…”

“What? Like jerking each-other off?” Tilly asked curiously.

Robby nodded.

“What else? Blowing each-other?”

“Just me.” Robby said uncertainly. He shouldn’t be telling her all this, he knew that. She was practically a stranger and this stuff getting around school would definitely not be good for him.

“So you are into guys?”

Was he? He did like a lot of what Miguel did to him – even if he never had a say in it. But he liked looking at girls too, especially girls like Tilly. He liked imagining them naked, liked thinking about touching them, liked the idea of how they’d feel around him.

“I don’t know.” He said, unsure. “I know I’m into you.”

Tilly smiled at that and Robby felt uncomfortable. This was getting too serious, too real. Robby hadn’t shared this stuff with… with anyone. He had no one in his life he trusted enough for that. No one who wouldn’t hold it against him or use it against him.

Tilly must have felt the same way because she switched directions too.

“You know I’m not a dude, right?” She joked. “I don’t actually have a dick.”

Banter? He could do that.

“Afraid I’m gonna need to see proof.” Robby replied grinning cheekily ear to ear.

Tilly gave him a considering look before throwing away the rest of the of the joint.

“Alright.” She said, casually. “Let’s go.”

Robby’s eyes widened and he couldn’t even react as Tilly grabbed his arm and dragged him back inside. He let him go once they were through the door and he continued to follow her dumbly. This was a joke, right? Some kind of trap to humiliate him? Some guys yelled out at Tilly as they made their way through the crowd, but she gave them no reaction beyond flipping them the bird. Before Robby knew it, he was being pushed into one of the empty bedrooms and Tilly was closing the door behind her.

* * *

“This isn’t gonna work if you are scared.” She said, looking at him.

“I’m not scared.” Robby said, curiously calm. “I just don’t buy it.”

He should be scared, right? Alone in the room with a girl like her, probably about to have sex for the first time. He should be a nervous wreck – blushing and fumbling over his words. All sorts of things should be going through his head – what if she laughs at him? What if someone walks in? What if he embarrasses himself? What if he’s bad at it? But none of that seemed to matter right now.

The weed. That had to be it. It was somehow making him clear-headed and muddled at the same time.

“Okay, let’s get a few things clear.” Tilly said, nodding at him. “First of all, this doesn’t make me your girlfriend. I want to have sex with you tonight because I like having sex and I like you. But that’s just for tonight. Just one time, got it? It doesn’t mean I’m desperate for it. It doesn’t mean you can just hit me up for a booty call whenever you feel like it. And it certainly doesn’t mean we are together. With me so far?”

Robby nodded. Just a hook-up. He could deal with that.

But why him? Why not one of the dozen hot guys downstairs who’d leap up the stairs at one word from her?

“I haven’t done this before.” Robby said, softly. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“That kinda makes it exciting.” Tilly smiled.

Robby kept looking at her uncertainly. There had to be a catch somewhere. If it was this easy for all the guys…

“Look, guys in high-school are dumb, small-minded Neanderthals.” Tilly explained as she saw the look on his face. “You let one of them make-out with you and they spend the next few weeks bragging about how you let them finger you. Now, I don’t really care what guys think, but once they get this idea that you are easy, they just won’t stop hassling you. I like having sex, alright? But that doesn’t make me a slut. It doesn’t mean I’ll just spread my legs for any rando with a hard-on. I don’t want stories like that spreading around the school. And something tells me you are not going to brag about this.”

There it was. Mystery solved. She didn’t have to spell it out, but Robby got the message anyway.

Tilly had something on him – his revelation about blowing guys. She didn’t need to be afraid of him spreading stories because she could just as easily tell others about what he’d told her. Knowing that made him the “safe” choice.

Which meant it probably wasn’t a trick after all.

“How do we do this?” Robby asked uncertainly.

“How about we start with a kiss?” Tilly suggested.

_Go slow,_ Robby told himself. _Just keep that in mind for now. You don’t want to look like a desperate little boy. So control yourself and do everything slowly._

Kissing Tilly was nothing like kissing Miguel, even though there were similarities. Tilly was bigger than him too, but unlike Miguel, she let him take the lead. Her skin felt softer under his hands and he liked the way her longer hair tickled his arms over her shoulders. It wasn’t easy, keeping himself in check, but he managed to anyway. He explored her mouth slowly, gently moving his hands over her body, down to her waist and slipping his hands under her shirt, resisting the urge to move them up immediately.

Tilly responded by moving her own hands under his shirt and running her hands down his chest before grabbing the hem of his shirt and pulling it upwards. Robby had to break the kiss to let her take his shirt off.

“Not bad.” Tilly said, licking at lips and looking into his eyes. Then she looked down at his bare chest and abs. “Not bad at all.”

Robby grinned at the compliment and pulled her shirt off as well. He tried fumbling with her bra-hooks behind her, but Tilly just laughed and moved his hands away. Instead she guided his hand below, towards the waistband of her jeans while she went to work undoing herself. Robby got the idea an slipped his hand inside to find her warm and wet against his hand.

The bra fell off revealing her breasts to him and Robby looked down at them hungrily. His free hand went up to them, squeezing and rubbing his thumb over the nipple, making her sigh in pleasure. He felt Tilly’s hands unbutton his jeans and pull them down to his knees. He shivered as cold air his it groin and then shuddered as her warm hand wrapped around his weeping cock.

He went back to kissing her, moving his lips lower, at the juncture of her jaw and her neck while his hands continued their ministrations. One hand massaged her boobs, alternating between them while two fingers rubbed against her slit, barely slipping inside. Tillys own hands were on his groin, one stroking him and the other keeping him in place by grabbing a cheek. _I should stop her soon,_ Robby thought to himself. _I don’t wanna come just like this._

He never even heard the door open.

“What the hell is going on here?” A sharp voice said behind him, making him panic and pull his jeans up hastily.

“Tammy?” Tilly said, her eyes widening in fear and hands flying to her breasts to cover them up.

 _Shit. Shit. Shit._ He knew this was too good to be true. Nothing never actually worked out for him.

It was his own damn fault. He’d known that Tilly had a boyfriend. He’d known that she was with Tam. He’d seen them together at the skate-park, making out every now and then. But he had been too caught up in the moment, too drawn to Tilly to think about the adverse consequences. And now the bill had come due.

“You’re cheating on me? With _him_?” Tam said angrily. Had he always been that big?

Tilly shrugged nervously, moving backwards on the bed and Robby’s protective instincts kicked in.

“Back off, okay?” Robby said, stepping in between them. “It wasn’t her fault.”

He must have looked ridiculous – jeans barely up with his ass hanging out. Facing off against a guy almost twice his size. Tam was half-Asian and way more muscular than skaters were supposed to be. Robby might’ve had him beat on he board but he knew he had absolutely no chance in a fist-fight.

He was going to get his ass kicked and he deserved it.

Tam grabbed his shoulders and swung him around, slamming him against the wall. Robby resisted the urge to swing his fist. He wanted to avoid a beating as far as possible and if he could get away with just a few threats, he’d count that as a win.

“So what? You her boyfriend now?” Tam scowled down at him, one hand on his chest keeping him in place.

“No.” Robby replied. “But she can do what she wants.”

He knew that was a lame excuse. There were rules to a relationship and Tam had every reason to be pissed off. But this was his screw-up. Tilly was high and probably drunk and Robby had taken advantage of that.

“Bullshit.” Tam sneered.

“Look, she is high, okay?” Robby tried to be reasonable. “She doesn’t know what she is doing.”

“So you are taking advantage of my girlfriend? Is that it?” Tam asked, more calmly. “So it’s your ass I should be kicking?”

Robby didn’t answer, but that was the obvious conclusion, wasn’t it? He closed his eyes, waiting for the inevitable punch. Robby could take the pain – Miguel had made sure of that much atleast. And hopefully, Tam would consider their size and age difference and go easy on him.

“Chivalrous one, isn’t he?” Tam said and Robby could hear the amusement in his voice.

“Told you he was sweet.” Tilly replied coyly, all traces of fear gone from her voice. “Most guys would either be running away or pissing their pants by now.”

Robby opened his eyes and looked between the pair of amused seventeen-year olds. It was a trick after all, he realized. A trap to embarrass and humiliate him. Somehow, in the span of their conversation, Tilly had planned it and brought Tam in on it without Robby ever realizing. It was a game these two played – Tilly lured in some sucker with the promise of sex – and she was irresistible – and Tam played the jealous boyfriend who caught them in the act. Then they’d both humiliate the guy – maybe Tam would beat him up – and judging by Tam’s erection against his leg and the way Tilly was still touching herself, they both got off on it.

And this time, Robby was the sucker.

He’d have run off right there and then and damn his state of undress if not for Tam still holding him in place.

“Think he’s in love with you?” Tam asked as if Robby wasn’t even there.

“No – he’s a just a good guy.” Tilly replied.

“Maybe I should fight him for you.” Tam suggested. “A good old cockfight. We could both strip naked and wrestle until I make him cum and then I can make him watch as I fuck you. Would you like that?”

“Two hot guys fighting over me? What girl wouldn’t?” Tilly replied. “How about it, Robby? You up for that?”

Why were they doing this? They were supposed to be nice, both of them. They were always nice to him on the skatepark. Why did they want to humiliate him all of a sudden? Was it something about him? The same thing that made Miguel pin him down and use him as he liked?

“Please. Just let me go.” Robby pleaded, somehow holding back the tears of embarrassment.

The amusement was gone instantly and replaced with something that looked like concern. Tam moved his hand right away, but stayed where he was, crowding Robby against the wall.

“Don’t you want to fuck her anymore?” Tam asked.

More tricks. They’d dangle that prospect in front of him and fuck with him some more.

“Don’t jerk me around, alright?” Robby said, angrily. “Just let me get out of here and you two can play your sick games with someone else.”

Tilly looked guilty suddenly. So did Tam.

“Alright, game over.” She said, scooching forward on the bed. “We’ll be straight with you from now on.”

Robby didn’t say anything. Instead he stepped around Tam and went to pick up his shirt, eager to get out of there as fast as possible.

“I didn’t lie to you. I do want to have sex with you.” Tilly continued.

Robby suppressed a snort at that as he was untangling his shirt. _Yeah right! Like that’s gonna happen now with your boyfriend right here in the room._

“And I’d like to watch.” Tam added.

Robby froze. _Watch? Is he serious? He wants to watch some guy do his girlfriend? Does he actually expect me to buy that?_

He felt Tam step behind him and put a hand on his shoulder.

“Look, we both have a lot of sex with each-other, okay? Like, a lot.” He said, squeezing Robby’s shoulder gently. “Sometimes, we like to switch it up by letting someone else in. Guy or a girl – it doesn’t matter. It just has to be the right person. Sure we mess around a little at the start, but from here on out, no more games.”

Robby blinked, looking at them incredulously. Tilly reassured him with a nod, but he wasn’t buying it. They were still trying to trick him somehow. They were trying to lure him in again so they could do something nasty like throw him out of the room without his clothes.

But then Tam took his shirt off and wrapped his arms around Robby’s waist from behind and nuzzled his neck.

“How about we prove it to you, huh?” He said, gently turning him towards the bed. “Tilly will show you that we really want you here, won’t you sweetheart?”

 _No, not again,_ Robby thought, despairing. It was like with Miguel all over again. The bigger guy just had to wrap those strong arms around him holding him in place, he just had to press his bare chest against his back, his erection against the small of Robby’s back and Robby found himself getting hard immediately. He’d barely managed to push himself inside hid jeans when Tam had come in, but he’d never even zipped himself up and now he was sliding out again.

But Tam pushed his jeans down and Tilly crawled forward and grabbed hold of him, stroking him until he was completely erect. She glanced upwards, giving him a naughty look before swallowing his cock to the root.

“Unghh…” Robby moaned at the warm, wet sensation around his cock. His knees gave out almost immediately, but Tam’s arm wrapped around him kept him in place.

 _They are not messing with me._ He thought as he felt Tam’s free hand exploring his body and his lips pepper his neck with soft kisses. _They do want to have sex with me. Both of them. Even Tam._

“So? You staying?” Tam asked, whispering in his ear as he played with his nipples.

Was he? He couldn’t say. His legs didn’t have the strength to walk away. In fact, he’d have collapsed if not for Tam holding him up. But was that the same as choosing to stay? He hadn’t even been certain about his hook-up with Tilly. That wasn’t how he’d imagined his first time with a girl. And with Tam in the mix now…

 _Don’t be a pussy,_ a voice in his head said. That’s what his dad would say, right? And Miguel? They were always talking about being bold and daring, about seizing opportunities, about just going for it. Neither of them would ever let this chance slip by. But Robby had always been too much of a coward, too in his head to go for something he wanted.

Well, not tonight.

He nodded his head firmly and felt Tam smile against him.

“He’s in, T.” He said and Tilly let him go, smiling up at him.

* * *

He was afraid again for a moment when they both let him go, but then they started taking their own clothes off. Following suit, he took his jeans off the rest of the way. No sooner than he’d done that he felt Tam pull him back again. He fell onto the big chair behind him with Robby on his lap and wrapped his hand around Robby’s spit-slick cock, stroking him gently to keep him hard. Tilly knelt on the bed naked in front of him, rubbing herself between the legs and looking at them both intensely.

“So how do you wanna do this?” Tam asked.

_How do I - ? I don’t know. I don’t know anything about how this is supposed to work._

“How about I teach you a few things about making girls happy?” Tam offered. “Might work out for you when you have your own girlfriend. Then I can watch you practice with T as I jerk myself off.”

“Or you could join in.” Tilly suggested. “Robby told me he liked guys too.”

Robby went cold for a moment as Tam sat up and turned him around on his lap. He tried to keep his head turned, to keep looking at Tilly, but Tam grabbed his jaw and forced him to look at him.

“That right, Robby?” He asked. “You like me too?”

He’d been afraid to look at Tam, Robby realized. All this time, he’d kept his eyes glued on Tilly because he was afraid to see the other guy. Afraid of seeing the same look of scorn and derision he’d seen on Miguel’s face when he’d called him a freak. But Tam wasn’t looking at him like that. He looked eager. Excited.

 _Do I like him?_ Robby had never thought about other guys like that. Nobody except for Miguel. It was different with girls – he’d always felt his heart skip a bit whenever a hot one walked by. But as for guys…

Tam was hot. Like, objectively hot. That jaw was sharp enough to cut glass and that body wouldn’t be out of place in an underwear ad. And while Robby had never really imagined him like that before, here he was anyway, naked and hard under him, stroking him and looking up at him expectantly. And then there was his attitude – the casual, in-charge demeanor that made him feel taken care of. Robby did feel a flutter of excitement looking down at the older boy. That much he could not deny.

On instinct, Robby leaned forward and kissed Tam. He was acting like the fourteen year old boy he was now, all eager and desperate to explore the mouth under him, but Tam didn’t seem to mind. He felt his hands on his ass again, pulling him closer before Tam closed his fist around the both of them together. The heat of Tam’s member against him almost made him cum there and then. He knew he would’ve had Tam started stroking them and Tam probably knew it too – which is why he just held them together.

He heard Tilly moan in pleasure behind him before Tam broke the kiss and pushed him away a little.

“Want me to fuck you?” Tam asked, softly. “We could really make this a night of firsts for you.”

Robby blinked, uncertain again. This really could be a night of firsts – his first blowjob, his first time with a girl, his first time with a guy inside him… his first threesome. And who knew what else? But that was too good to be true, right?

“It’ll hurt.” He said, softly.

“I know what I’m doing.” Tam replied. “And if it hurts even a little, you tell me and I’ll pull out right away. Got it? No need to be a hero.”

Robby nodded, still a little scared and Tam grinned, giving him a quick peck on the lips. He pushed him off his lap then and turned him towards Tilly.

“Go get her, tiger.” He said, giving him a playful slap on the butt.

Tilly beckoned him forward and he responded, picking up where they’d left off. Tam putted around, doing something just outside Robby’s field of vision, but his entire focus was on Tilly now – how her mouth felt around his tongue, how her soft, pillowy breasts felt under his hands as he squeezed. And how her breath caught when he slipped two fingers inside her. She didn’t touch him this time and he was thankful for that. He didn’t want to finish too soon.

He felt her hands on his shoulders, pushing him downwards and he responded to her guidance, kissing his way down her neck. He paused at her breasts, licking and sucking and her stiff nipples before moving south again, his tongue swiping a trail along the way. He was just going on instinct here, but he must have been doing something right because Tilly’s breathing kept getting harder.

The first lick tasted salty and a little sweet and made Tilly buck her hips up. The second one made her moan in pleasure and he pushed his fingers in again with the third. Tilly pushed at his head, as if she was trying to get his whole face in there and Robby started licking in earnest. He use his fingers to spread her apart, exploring deeper with his tongue as his thumb rubbed the top of her slit.

He felt the bed dip as Tam climbed on to the bed beside them, his hard cock brushing against Robby’s cheek and leaving a trail of cum. They were making out above him, he could tell by the sounds. He reached up with his other hand and grabbed Tam, stroking him and making him leak more cum. His mouth left Tilly and went to Tam, licking at his head before sucking it in.

“He’s so good.” Tam moaned and Robby flushed at pride at the compliment. He couldn’t help it then – he was harder than ever and he started rubbing himself against the mattress to get some relief.

No sooner had he started that he felt Tam pull away. The older boy scooched down until Robby could feel his breath against his neck.

“Just focus on T, okay?” Tam whispered to him., putting a hand under his waist and pushing him up. “I’ll take care of you.”

 _Easier said than done,_ Robby thought as Tam kissed his way down his spine. He readied himself for fingers as hands spread his cheeks apart but he was completely unprepared for the swipe of the tongue. _Holy shit! He’s gonna eat me out like I’m doing to Tilly. I didn’t even know you could do that to guys._

Tam’s tongue against his hole felt amazing. Torturous even, especially with him holding Robby’s hips up and denying his cock any friction at all. Robby tried his best to keep his attention on Tilly – on the sounds she was making – but he still felt it when the first finger pushed its way past his rim and inside.

He could feel Tam exploring, pushing at his walls from the inside as if looking for something. And then they pressed against something that made Robby see stars. He moaned deep, right into Tilly’s cunt and that made her shudder in return. Tam twisted and crooked his finger inside, all the while licking around it and every time he pressed against the spot, Robby could feel himself getting looser.

One finger became two, scissoring and spreading him and he followed the example and did the same to Tilly. Soon there were three inside him and Robby had never felt so full in his life.

“Ready for the real thing?” Tam asked and Robby nodded, still a little nervous.

He felt himself being pulled up until he was on all fours. The fingers left him and he whined at the sudden feeling of emptiness. Tam chuckled behind him as he tore open a condom and rolled it over his dick, jerking it to keep it hard. Robby felt some cold lube drizzle over his ass and slide down over his crack. Tam’s fingers pushed in again as it rolled over his hole and he sucked in a nervous breath, mentally preparing himself for the next part.

“Look at me, baby.” Tilly said, holding his face in her hands. “Just keep your eyes on me.”

Robby nodded and stared into her eyes, not daring to move a muscle.

“Hold him open for me.” Tam said and Tilly’s hands moved down to his ass, spreading his cheeks apart.

Robby clenched at the first push, but Tam’s cock slipped inside anyway. He felt himself spasm around it and the older boy stayed in place letting him adjust. He kept his eyes locked with Tilly’s as he felt Tam push in deeper and deeper until he was seated fully inside.

“You okay, Robby?” Tam asked. “Does it hurt?”

Robby shook his head. He felt pressure and he felt full, but it definitely did not hurt. It felt good. Really, really good.

“Okay.” Tam said, experimentally thrusting a little. “Let’s get you ready.”

 _There’s more?_ Robby thought as Tilly smiled and picked up the bottle of lube Tam had thrown aside. She picked up a second sachet of condom and tore it with her teeth before putting it on Robby.

“Good thing you are already close to Tam’s size.” Tilly said, as she unrolled it along his length. “You’ll be a really big boy in a few years.”

“Hey, it’s not the size of the tool, it’s how you use it.” Tam said, pulling out and thrusting back in.

Robby couldn’t disagree – not when he felt Tam’s cock press against that spot inside him that made him see stars. Tille spread her legs wide and Tam pushed them both down, guiding Robby inside her. They all stayed like that for a moment – with Robby inside Tilly and Tam inside Robby – and then Tam started moving.

It was messy and confusing – the three of them moving together in a tangle of sweaty limbs. Robby let Tam dictate the rhythm – not like he had the presence of mind to dictate anything anyway. Hands went everywhere and Robby had no idea whose they were when they were pinching his nipples, raking nails down his chest or grabbing his butt, pushing him deeper into the girl under him. What his own hands were doing was a mystery as well. Were they holding him up? Was it his hand that was pressing against Tilly’s breast? Or was it behind him, grabbing Tam’s ass and pushing it in deeper. The lips and mouths went all over as well – one moment he was leaning down kissing Tilly, the next he was craning his neck backwards, trying to catch Tam.

They were all kneeling on the bed at some point, Tam and Tilly making out over his shoulder before both of them turned their attention to him. Tam was practically slamming into him by now, making him slam into Tilly in return. Robby had no idea who was making what sounds but he was certain that atleast some of those embarrassing moans were coming from him.

He didn’t last long – but you could hardly blame him for that. He was the youngest of the three and this was his first time. Not to mention, he was the one being double-teamed by the two of them. Between hot and tight around him and Tam big and throbbing inside him, it was a surprise he lasted this long at all. He moaned as his whole body shuddered with the orgasm before going limp against Tam’s chest.

They didn’t stop – neither of them. They knew the moment Robby had finished and Tam’s hand flew down, gripping the base of his cock to keep the blood from rushing out. They both picked up the pace, practically slamming with a frenzy now, almost as if they were fucking each-other through him. Robby barely had the presence of mind to push his fingers into Tilly right beside his softening dick.

Tilly came some time later, moaning and clenching around Robby’s spent cock and Tam followed a few moments after. Robby felt him enlarge and pulse inside of him as he bit down on his shoulder trying to suppress the groan. All three of them fell back on the bed after that, exhausted and sweaty, with Robby still sandwiched between them.

* * *

Would it feel the same with Miguel, Robby wondered as he lay between them. They were looking at each-other now, absent-mindedly touching Robby and his own mind drifted to his not-brother. Being in Tilly had felt amazing – way better than his own hand – but having Tam in him was something else altogether. Robby had never known about that spot inside him, but from the moment he’d discovered that guys could fuck each-other like that, he’d imagined Miguel doing that to him. In one of his better moods, ofcourse – holding him down, gently, pushing inside, while kissing him and running comforting hands on his stomach…

Robby stiffened. Why was he thinking about Miguel right now? After the amazing time these two had shown him, Miguel should’ve been the last thing on his mind. Why – even after this mind-blowing sex – did his thoughts keep turning to the guy who made his life miserable?

 _Because you love him,_ a voice whispered. _It’s not just a crush – you realize that, right? It’s like Miguel said – you are a freak who falls in love with the guy who hurts you, who torments you and uses you and you can’t deny it anymore._

Robby got up. He had to get out of there, right now. Tilly had said that this was just for one night, that this didn’t mean anything beyond that and he was okay with that. But this moment of afterglow – that was for them. They loved each-other and they were done with Robby and now, he was just intruding where he wasn’t wanted.

“What’s wrong?” Tilly asked as he searched for his clothes.

“Nothing.” Robby replied. “I should get home before I get in trouble for sneaking out.”

They didn’t buy it. They both got up, pulling at his arm and pulling him between them again.

“C’mon. What’s wrong?” Tam asked.

“It’s just - ” Robby racked his brain. “It’s not how I imagined my first time would be.”

Tilly looked at him a little sadly.

“It never is, you know.” She said, reassuringly. “People always imagine rose-petals and candles but it’s never like that. Never that good.”

That wasn’t it. He’d never had a clear picture of what his first time should be like except for it being with Miguel. With him looming over him as he pushed inside.

“It was good.” Robby insisted. “No – it was great. I just thought it’d be with someone I love. And you said it was just for one night, right?”

Tilly nodded and so did Tam. They were all on the same page now.

“I had fun. I really did.” Robby continued. “But that was it, right? I don’t want to get any wrong ideas. You two should be together now and I should… I should go.”

They bought that, thankfully. They didn’t raise anymore objections as he put on his underwear and jeans.

“How about I give you a gift before you go?” Tilly asked. “You were really good tonight and I think you deserve a reward.”

Robby looked at her skeptically. Wasn’t everything they did for him reward enough?

“You know, your classmates are gonna die with jealousy when you tell them about this.” Tam told him.

Robby stared at them. That wasn’t part of the deal. In fact, it was the opposite – hadn’t they chosen him specifically because he wouldn’t say anything?

“I won’t tell anyone.” He said, quickly. “I promise.”

“You can if you want to.” Tilly said.

“But… you said - ”

“I said I don’t want big stories floating around.” Tilly clarified. “But I’m not scared of the truth. This happened and you were good. Nothing to be ashamed of here.”

Robby nodded, slowly. Not that it mattered. Nobody would believe this anyway. Not that a girl like Tilly would want to have sex with him, much less that a guy like Tam would share her like that.

“Gimme your phone.” Tilly said and Robby obeyed numbly. “Now get behind me and wrap your arms around me like your touching me.”

Robby wasn’t sure what was going on so he followed her instructions. He got behind her and wrapped one arm around her chest, while putting the other one between her legs. He buried her face in her hair, biting her ear and heard a click as the camera flashed. Tilly showed him the picture on his phone.

“This is your reward.” She said, giggling. “If anyone accuses you of making stuff up, you can show this to them to prove it.”

He still felt uncertain, looking at the picture, then at her and then at Tam.

“You sure?” He asked, turning to Tam. “How are you okay with this?”

Tam shrugged. “It’s about trust, dude.” He explained. “I know T loves me and that no one can come between us. So I don’t give a shit what anyone else says or thinks.”

They were giving him their permission. No – they were giving him their blessing. With this one picture, he could end up being the most popular guy in the freshman class. Scoring with a girl like Tilly before even starting high-school – he knew Miguel would just die of jealousy.

And yet, it felt wrong to use this. Like even if she said she was okay with it, it would end up hurting Tilly somehow.

“I’m never gonna use this.” Robby insisted. “I don’t care about being popular and this feels wrong.”

“I know.” Tilly replied. “That’s why I’m trusting you with it.”

* * *

He didn’t expected Johnny to be proud. Not like he was of Miguel. He’d given up on that particular fantasy ages ago. He was proud of Miguel though, wasn’t he? Like when the guy asked him about how to impress Tory.

“She hot?” Was the first thing Johnny asked.

Thy talked for over an hour before dinner, in front of the TV, as Robby sat there pretending not to listen. Miguel had to kiss the girl on the first date – Johnny insisted. He had to make his move, strike first, strike hard and all that. Johnny regaled them with the stories from his own youth – going to parties, sneaking off and hooking up with his girlfriend, being the first among his friends to go all the way. Getting the girl, making your move, working your way up to getting laid – all that was part of becoming a man and Johnny was hella proud of Miguel for taking that first step. And he’d been even prouder later when Miguel had told them every little detail of his first date – and first kiss – over dinner.

 _You kissed me first,_ Robby thought sullenly. But clearly, that didn’t count for Miguel.

Robby did think about telling them then but he knew that Miguel would just get pissed off at him for stealing attention. And he’d given up on competing with him for Johnny’s attention ages ago. He’d lost that war too soundly to try again.

But he did think that Johnny would be impressed if he knew. Even if it was begrudging. He’d done everything like in Johnny’s stories, right?

But Robby couldn’t do anything right after all. Not where Johnny was concerned. No sooner had Robby told him that Johnny disavowed the whole thing. Went back on his whole life-philosophy. All of a sudden, they were too young for sex now. Too young to even date. They were supposed to be focused on their studies and sports and their friends – not girls or sex.

Robby hadn’t done anything wrong. He knew that. He had been careful, he’d taken precautions and he hadn’t gotten involved. He still saw Tilly and Tam around the skate-park, waved to them, talked to them, even learned a few things from them – but they were just friends now, nothing more. Robby didn’t ask to be in their bedroom again and they didn’t offer. But Johnny had a way of making him feel like a dumb kid who’d made a stupid decision – some horrible mistake that he himself didn’t understand.

Robby wondered how Johnny would react if he knew about what was going on between him and Miguel. He’d kick him out, right? That was the only possible outcome. Miguel could do no wrong, even though Miguel was the doing that stuff to him. No doubt, Johnny would blame Robby for corrupting his “good son” and throw him out in the streets before he could do any more damage.

Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad though – once Mom was out of rehab for good. Robby could save this card and play it when Shannon was ready to take him back. Johnny would make a show of wanting him around, no doubt, but Robby could play it then and Johnny would have an excuse for getting rid of him for good.


	11. Robby V

Robby had a bully in his life and his name was Miguel. And what was worse was that he was in love with his bully.

Robby hadn’t liked Miguel at first. Who’d like the guy who stole your father, right? And even after he’d realized that Miguel hadn’t stolen him, Robby had still resented the guy. Maybe Johnny would’ve gotten interested eventually had Miguel not given him a “better” option. That resentment didn’t really go away even though he knew it wasn’t fair. The truth was, Johnny simply didn’t want him around and that would’ve stayed true whether or not Miguel was in his life. It took Robby a long time to truly accept that.

He kind of started liking Miguel once they were living together. He had no intention of changing his mind. The arrangement was temporary after all. He was just curious, that was all. Curious to find out what Miguel had done right to make Johnny love him that much and where Robby had gone wrong. And he’d started noticing things – the thousand little ways Miguel was better than him and therefore, worth more.

Miguel really was a sweet kid – Robby had to admit that right away. He’d even offered Robby his bed the first night he’d stayed over, even though Robby had been an ass to him about it. He was always smiling and laughing and talking about his day, about his friends, about anything and everything. Ofcourse people would like having him around. He wasn’t sulking and brooding and quiet like Robby.

He was kind too – sharing his room with Robby like that. He knew Miguel didn’t like him. Robby had given him no reason to. But he’d still let him stay there without much objection. Robby hadn’t realized how much Miguel sacrificed just to be nice to him until they changed taco night to pasta night. That was the difference between them, right? When Miguel had pushed his way into his time with Johnny for even a day or an evening, Robby had acted like an ass. But when Robby did that to him, he took that with grace and dignity.

He was smart. Way smarter than Robby could ever hope to be. He had his nose in the book all the time and he got straight A’s and all the teachers loved him. Unlike Robby, who always got exasperated shakes of heads. He did try to do better there, but even after cramming all weekend, a B was the best he was able to do, whereas Miguel easily scored an A with half the work. Robby had given up on that afterwards. What was the point of humiliating himself if he was going to lose anyway. And the way Johnny kept rubbing Miguel’s A’s in his face – the least Robby could do was not give him the satisfaction of knowing that he’d gotten to him.

He worked hard at everything. Robby could see that as well. No matter what it was, Miguel always gave it his all.

But above all, Miguel was kind of a hero. Robby learned that when he started going to his school. Miguel had bit of a reputation as a bully-hunter. Robby saw that for himself with this younger kid a couple of older boys were picking on. He’d just stood by with the crowd as they tossed his backpack between them and made the kid run around trying to catch it. But Miguel stepped in right away, catching and returning the bag and glaring the other guys into submission. He could’ve totally kicked their asses and they knew better than to tangle with him.

Robby could never be Miguel – he realized that right away. He tried to copy him once at dinner. Started running his mouth about his day. But he ended up fumbling – saying wrong and stupid things and running out of stuff pretty much right away. He didn’t want to be like the guy either, he realized. For better or for worse, he was who he was and there was no changing it. If people didn’t like him for him, then to hell with them. He wasn’t Miguel, he was never going to be Miguel and he wasn’t going to embarrass himself by trying to be.

He could still admire the guy, though. He could still notice all his good qualities, all the reasons why people liked him more.

* * *

Robby didn’t know when that admiration turned into something more. He’d never lived in such proximity to another guy before, nor had he ever had any close friends to show him exactly where the line was. Best he could tell, it was all the little things that kept adding up.

Like watching him change after he came out of the shower, with drops of water still sliding down his broadening back. Miguel wasn’t comfortable being naked in front of Robby at first – he’d always put on his underwear with the towel still wrapped around his waist. Robby found the whole show kinds of funny at first. Miguel would always look to make sure that Robby wasn’t watching and Robby would always pretend to be busy and uninterested – but Miguel’s butt would always peek out from under the towel every time he pulled his briefs up and Robby enjoyed catching a glimpse of that. He knew he’d be teased mercilessly if Miguel ever caught him looking and the risk made it exciting somehow.

He liked seeing Miguel shirtless, comparing their bodies that were so different. Miguel had always been skinny, but he was starting to fill out now. Robby had always prided himself on his own body – skateboarding every day had given him abs at thirteen already – but Miguel looked strong. The corded muscles of his chest and arms gave him a real tough guy appearance. There were other differences as well – Miguel’s skin was darker, with deep brown dime-sized nipples that had tufts of hair growing around them. And he was developing a treasure trail from below his bellybutton that disappeared into the waistband of his briefs. And his legs were already pretty hairy.

Robby was completely different – his pale skin contrasting his arms and shoulders tanned from being out in the sun. And he was smooth and almost hairless compared to Miguel. He wondered if the differences continued down under as well, if Miguel would be harier around the pubes and the balls as well.

He wasn’t the only one noticing the differences. He caught Miguel looking a few times while he was changing.

“How do you get your abs like that?” He asked, looking at Robby’s flexed stomach enviously.

“Just skateboarding, I guess.” Robby replied smugly. He liked the attention and he liked the fact that for once, Miguel had a reason to be jealous of him. He pretended to go back to his phone but Robby saw him sneak a few glances anyway.

There was this other time he’d seen Miguel jerk off. “Seen” would be exaggerating – he’d woken up in the middle of the night to the sounds of quiet moans coming from the next bed. He couldn’t see anything in the dark except for the silhouette of Miguel’s hand moving. He’d stayed quiet, pretending to still be asleep and hoping Miguel wouldn’t be able to see him either. He heard Miguel finish and saw him stand up, his figure outlined by the moonlight as he cleaned himself up. Robby found himself hard looking at those muscles rippling in the light shining through the curtains but he refrained from touching himself until he heard soft snores coming from Miguel’s bed again.

Another time, Miguel came back from karate practice all tense and sweaty and Robby couldn’t stop staring as he started changing right in front of him. Maybe it was the workout, but Miguel looked particularly ripped that day and he had his underwear off before he noticed Robby in the room.

“What are you looking at, perv?” Miguel asked, hurriedly wrapping a towel around his waist.

“Nothing.” Robby said, quickly turning away.

Miguel scoffed and threw his briefs at Robby before leaving for the shower. Robby picked them up as soon as he was out and sniffed, inhaling the scent of sweat and musk and something else. The smell went straight to his cock and he jerked himself off quickly – before Miguel could come back – with his nose buried where Miguel’s crotch had been. The risk of being caught like that made him cum faster than ever, but in the end, he was back to his usual self by the time Miguel came back.

It was wrong, having these feelings and acting like that. Not because they were brothers – they weren’t. They weren’t even friends. They were roommates, though and Robby felt like he was crossing a line, perving on Miguel like that. He tried not to, he really did. But he couldn’t help it, not with Miguel right there all the time.

Robby consoled himself with the fact that it wasn’t going to last. Soon, his mom would be back and take him home and he wouldn’t have to see Miguel again. Then this would just be an embarrassing thing he’d look back on years down the line. No one would ever discover the truth.

That’s what he’d hoped but that was dashed to pieces when Miguel pulled his shorts down and spanked his ass raw. Any hope of going undiscovered went out the window the moment Miguel rubbed his butt and made him stiffen up harder than ever. And then he’d made him jerk off right in front of him.

He had to know, right? What kind of weirdo gets off on being spanked?

Robby had expected to be teased, to be humiliated. To be laughed at and to have his hard and leaking cock made fun of. But Miguel had acted like it was no big deal. Robby had searched his face for some hint of scorn, of mockery, of a sign that this was some cruel trick – but all he’d found was eager encouragement.

None of that made the shame go away, though and he wanted to hate Miguel for making him do it. But he found that he hated himself more.

* * *

He was the problem here, not Miguel or Johnny or anyone else. He came to that realization the longer he lived with them. They all made a loving little family and he was the unwanted intruder, just like Miguel had said.

And truthfully, there was no reason for anyone to want him. They only put up with him because Johnny was stuck with him, which meant, they were too.

He thought he was getting along with Rosa – they had their own naughty little secret after all – but then he ended up getting her in trouble with Carmen over the weed. He should’ve just taken the blame for it. Everyone hated him anyway. But he’d been too scared and he’d ended up ruining that budding friendship.

Carmen was nice – really nice. She was probably the one who was nicest to Robby, the only one who tried to make sure that Miguel treated him well. She’d done her best to make Robby feel welcome and at home. But accepting her kindness had felt like he was betraying mom. Like if he acted grateful about his new living situation, he’d validate everything bad Johnny ever said about Shannon. And he couldn’t do that to his mom, could he?

He’d almost started to like living there, started to like the hot dinners every night, having clean clothes every morning, having people around even if he wasn’t talking to them. And he’d hated himself for it. His mom deserved better than that. She deserved better than to feel like she wasn’t good enough to take care of him. Robby knew that was a horrible feeling and Robby had no intention of making her feel like that. He was angry with himself and he’d taken it out on Carmen and that was really unfair. So he had ended up ruining that too and Carmen had kept her distance after that.

She was still nice to him, but even she had her limits, right? She ended up having some random kid forced upon her and she was just making the best of a bad situation.

Johnny had never wanted him around from the start. He’d made that much clear from the beginning. Even now, with them living in the same house, his attention was always on Miguel. Sure, he went through the motions – asking Robby about his day, asking him about his studies, involving him in the stuff he did with Miguel – but he didn’t really want Robby there. Robby could see that he always had more fun when it was just him and Miguel and he always got this disturbed, scared look on his face when Robby was involved. Like he was just waiting for Robby to do something to screw it all up.

And Miguel… Robby was the only one he was ever an ass to. The guy was nice to _everybody._ Friendly and helpful and kind and polite. He never said anything bad about anyone. Or to anyone. Sure, he couldn’t stand bullies and he beat them up when he had the chance, but he didn’t say anything mean to them. That was just for Robby.

That had to mean something, right? Robby was the only common thread in this all. He was the one nobody wanted around. He was the one who brought out the ugly, mean side in Miguel. He was the creep who got off on watching Miguel, on being held down and touched and used.

Miguel could be kind to him. He often was, actually. He could be gentle and soft in a way that made Robby feel great. And every now and then, it felt like Miguel liked him back as well. But then he’d do something to piss Miguel off and it’d get all messed up all over again. He tried to avoid it – tried not to do things that would make Miguel mad. But he could never figure out what they were.

It was just not possible for anyone to love him, Robby realized. Miguel could be nice every now and then – have a little fun with him because it made them both feel good. But even he wasn’t able to deny the truth for long. He kept telling Robby – Robby just took too long to really hear it. No one wanted him there.

And Robby didn’t want to be where he wasn’t wanted. He would get out of there as soon as possible – but he wouldn’t go back to his mom. She didn’t want him either. He started saving up his allowance. He’d find a job soon as well. He’d collect it, little by little, until he had enough to live on his own. He’d get out of there, then and everyone would be happier for it.

* * *

Getting out with as little damage as possible was the best Robby could hope for. But it didn’t look like even that was going to happen.

There was still this thing inside of him – anger and resentment and jealousy all mixed together that made him say and do things he didn’t mean to. Things that hurt others. It was like there was a part of him that wanted others to be as miserable as he was.

It was that part that came out when he got home the night of the party. Johnny was just doing what he was supposed to, right? Kids sneaked out to parties and if they got caught, they got yelled at and grounded. But all Robby could think of at the time was that Johnny was being a hypocrite – that after all his stories about his own wild youth, he had no right to judge Robby like that. And that he wouldn’t have yelled at Miguel the same way had been the one to sneak out. Not that Miguel would’ve done it in the first place – he was the good son, after all.

But that just made Robby angrier. Made him yell back and blame Johnny for everything wrong with his life. He knew what he was doing but he couldn’t stop himself. He pushed and pushed until Johnny was over the edge and slapped him right across the face.

That felt good later. Not in the moment – in the moment, all he’d felt was fear of what was about to come. But later, when he thought about it, he felt satisfied. If he could drive Johnny to that much anger, then he could still hurt him. Which meant he still had some power over him. Which meant some part of Johnny still cared – even if it wasn’t much.

They all iced him out after that. Didn’t talk to him for days. But he didn’t care. He didn’t have anything to say to them anyway.

That part was the same reason why he refused to join Cobra Kai. He knew that would make Johnny feel better. But Miguel and Hawk and others only wanted him to join so that they’d have an excuse to humiliate him every day. Like Miguel had done in their first class. He wouldn’t give them the satisfaction – any of them. 

No matter how hard Miguel tried.

Because that was what Miguel was trying to do – get Robby to change himself. He had made that much clear from the start. He was trying to make everyone’s life better. Less miserable despite having Robby around. If Johnny felt like he was doing the dad thing right, if Carmen felt like she was being nice… well, they wouldn’t start caring about Robby, but they would feel better about themselves and that’s what Miguel wanted.

It certainly wasn’t because he cared about Robby. You didn’t treat people you cared about like that.

Like teasing him and messing with him all the time. Ofcourse Johnny shrugged it off as boys being boys – as something no different from what Miguel did with other guys. But that was supposed to go both ways – with both of them making fun of each-other. With either guy having the upper hand at any given time. Somehow, nobody seemed to notice that it was always Robby who got picked on. It was always Robby who got made fun of or got his ass slapped or gut-checked or put in a headlock or pinned down. And he never had the balls to retaliate because he knew Miguel would just put him across his knee and beat his ass red if he tried.

And then there was all the stuff they did when they were alone. Stuff that Robby actually liked most of the times. He did like Miguel after all, so ofcourse he was going to like being touched by him, kissing him, jerking off together.

But he did not like not having a say in any of that. Whatever they did, they did it on Miguel’s terms – what he wanted, when he wanted it and how he wanted it. It was like he was a toy that Miguel could use when he wanted and throw away when he didn’t.

And he definitely did not like how Miguel often looked at him after – like how he’d called him a freak that time. Miguel often got weirded out when Robby tried something he wanted. Like licking his cum off his fingers or letting his tongue move down while blowing him, almost to his hole. He’d looked disgusted by him and Robby had hated how that made him feel – so he just stop trying.

For a while, Robby almost fooled himself into thinking that Miguel was actually starting to care. That no matter how much of a creep Robby was, Miguel was starting to like him anyway. But then he’d started dating Tory and cured Robby of that particular delusion. That was what love actually looked like – the giggling, the constant making out, the hours spent talking on the phone. No matter how nice Miguel was during their time together, it was nothing like that and it was never going to be.

And then the thing with Hawk crushed whatever little hope he might’ve had left.

* * *

Hawk had had it out for Robby from the start. Maybe he was jealous of the guy who got to spend all the time with Miguel. Maybe he just didn’t like him like many others. Or maybe he was just an asshole. But the moment he had seen that it was okay to treat him like shit, he had started doing that every time they were together. He’d even gotten his other friends in on it. And once Miguel showed him that there were no actual limits to this thing, all bets were off.

Hawk came over a few days later to hang out, having somehow missed the memo that Miguel would be out with Tory all day. He stuck around anyway – Miguel wouldn’t mind sharing his bitch and Robby had the lips made for sucking cock. He just needed more practice.

Robby fought back that day for the first time in a long time. It was one thing for Miguel to do this shit, but he wasn’t going to start going to his knees for every Cobra around. But it was no use and Hawk wasn’t nearly as restrained as Miguel in the beatdown that followed. He stayed away from the face – that was smart of him – but the punches to his stomach almost made Robby throw up on the floor.

“Hurry up, fag.” Hawk said, holding Robby up with his hair and rubbing the head of his cock on his lips. “Unless you want Sensei to come back and find you like this.”

He could bite his cock off, Robby realized. The idiot didn’t even realize the jeopardy he was putting his manhood in. But if he did there, there would be no hiding this shit anymore and it’d be Robby they’d blame. Hawk was a Cobra after all and Johnny had always chosen them over him. So he resignedly parted his lips and tried not to choke when Hawk came down his throat.

That was only the start, unfortunately. Hawk didn’t do that when Miguel was around because they were both straight and straight guys didn’t do this shit around each-other. And thankfully, Miguel was around often enough for this not to be a regular thing. But he was spending more and more time with Tory, which meant Hawk had more chances to come over and “hang out”. Carmen and Johnny were completely oblivious ofcourse. If anything, they seemed grateful to Hawk for finally making friends with Robby.

Atleast Robby got better at it. Miguel noted the improvement one night as Robby swirled his tongue right under his foreskin.

“Lots of practice, right?” Miguel smiled down at him, before grabbing the back of his head and shoving himself deeper.

Robby couldn’t help it – he still felt a flicker of pride at the compliment. Maybe this was all he was good for, but atleast he was good for it. And then his heart sank again as he realized the truth – this was why Miguel was letting Hawk do it. So that Robby could get some practice and be better for him.

That had been the point of this all along – for Miguel to have someone to use to get off. That’s when the nightmares started – visions of Miguel and his friends beating him up, holding him down, using him, degrading him. And he knew it wasn’t going to get better. Hawk just got worse and worse.

“Think you can snitch on me, you asshole?” Hawk hissed, holding his against the wall and pressing his knee into Robby’s groin.

“I don’t - ” Robby started, but Hawk never let him finish.

The punch to the gut made the air go out of him and put him on the floor. Hawk grabbed his neck and pushed his face into the floor, kneeing him in the side in the process.

“You need to learn your place, fag.” Hawk said. “Clearly, I’ve been going too easy on you.”

He made Robby strip naked that day and then grabbed his balls and squeezed and twisted them until he cried. Then he made him kneel and jerk off as he sucked Hawk off. And this time, Hawk pulled out at the last second and came all over his face.

Hawk cornered him in the lockerroom room once, with a bunch of other Cobras. His usual gang of minions. The big, hot guy Robby had kinda liked once grabbed him from behind and held him in a full-nelson as Hawk whipped the towel off his waist, leaving him naked in front of them all.

“Guys here don’t believe me that you are fag.” Hawk told him. “So I’m gonna prove it to them.”

Robby felt humiliated and it only got worse as Hawk pinched his nipple and he started to get hard in front of all of them. It was a conditioned response by now.

“Hey man, Miguel said - ” The red-headed guy started saying, but Hawk cut him off.

“Miguel said not to hurt him.” Hawk interrupted. “But he likes this and Miguel’s cool with it.”

Hawk played with him like he was a new toy, that scornful sneer never leaving his face. He slapped Robby’s balls, grabbed his dick and twisted it, rubbed his thumb over the cock-head and the stimulation kept getting Robby harder. He started jerking Robby off almost painfully as the other guys grinned and leered at his shame. Robby tried to ignore the bigger guy’s erection he could feel against his butt as he spilled into Hawk’s hand.

“Lick.” Hawk ordered, bringing his cum-stained fingers up to Robby’s mouth.

 _I have no chance,_ Robby thought. He couldn’t even take them one at a time, let alone the five of them together. All he’d accomplish by resisting would be getting his ass beat. So he obediently opened his mouth and licked Hawk’s fingers clean as the others hooted and laughed.

“He is a fag.” One of them whispered in awe. “Think he likes taking it up the ass.”

Robby saw the gleam in Hawk’s eye and knew what it meant. It wouldn’t be long now.

Hawk held out for longer than expected. The next few times, he just made Robby finger himself open as he watched him hungrily, stroking his cock. He’d never touch Robby down there himself – he was disgusted by the very idea. But Robby was the desperate slut who liked taking it up the ass.

He didn’t really, though. Robby didn’t like being treated like that. He didn’t like being made to go down on his knees, called names, made to spread his legs and show himself off to the other boy. But Hawk didn’t believe him no matter what he said. How could he, with Robby’s own cock hard and drooling like that? He didn’t know why his body kept betraying him like that, but that was just how things were.

The first time Hawk fucked him was nothing like with Tam. Thankfully, Robby had prepped himself more than enough – so it didn’t hurt. But it was uncomfortable as hell. He didn’t even try to find that spot inside him – just slammed in and out like Robby was a sex-doll. Within minutes, he was humping him with the frenzy of a hamster in heat and Robby could only lie there and pray that it’d be over soon.

Thankfully, it was over within a minute – though it felt like an eternity. Hawk finished inside the rubber and pulled out, slapping Robby’s ass with a “good job” and Robby sighed in relief that it was over now.

Except, it had just begun – he realized a moment later when Hawk shoved his dick in Robby’s face and told him to lick it clean. Hawk had obviously liked it and he was going to start doing it more and more – whenever he got the chance. And he might even invite his buddies for a turn. And Miguel… once he found out that the option was on the table now, he’d want a turn as well. The thought had excited Robby once upon a time – but now the idea of Miguel treating him like Hawk did filled him with dread.

Robby was completely powerless to stop any of it. He couldn’t even tell anyone because nobody cared about him. Carmen would blame him for corrupting Miguel and Johnny would be disgusted at him for being a pussy. They’d definitely kick him out and then the streets would be worse. He had no option but to keep taking it until he had enough money saved up to make it on his own.

* * *

Maybe that’s why he sabotaged Miguel like that.

That wasn’t his intention – not clearly, atleast – but that’s where it’d led. He was just being petty when he texted Carmen about Miguel having a girl in his room. And Johnny’s reaction to the truth about Tilly was something nobody had expected. But intentions didn’t matter – the outcome of it all was that Tory ended up dumping Miguel and that neither of them was now allowed to date for a long, long time.

And Robby was okay with that. With the stories Hawk was spreading around about him, he probably couldn’t get a girl anyway and with Miguel around more, Hawk would probably back off. Hawk was paranoid about being thought of as gay and fucking some guy’s ass was something even he couldn’t rationalize away.

But Robby did end up screwing Miguel over for his own selfish reasons and he knew that the bill for that would come due sooner or later.

“You just have to ruin things for everybody, don’t you?” Miguel said, sullen and angry the day after the disastrous camping trip.

They’d both gotten a long lecture on maturity and grown-up relationships and waiting for the right time. And Robby might’ve almost bought it had Johnny not spent years talking proudly about his own wild youth. He had held his tongue for the most part, but once Johnny started talking about dumb kids making dumb mistakes, he couldn’t hold it in any longer.

“You are so full of shit!” He’d scoffed. “I didn’t do anything you wouldn’t have. You are just jealous that I got to do it at a younger age.”

Unfortunately, Johnny took that outburst as further proof that the boys were too immature to handle sex and relationships and simply reiterated the ban on dating and parties.

And Miguel ended up being collateral damage.

“You already got to get with a girl.” He said, scowling at Robby when they were back in their room. “So what do you care if the rest of us never get a chance?”

Robby did feel guilty about that. Maybe he had wanted this on some level, but he hadn’t wanted to upset Miguel. That was the only reason he made the offer.

“You don’t need a girl a to lose your virginity, you know?” He suggested quietly. “If you are that desperate, you can do it with a guy too.”

But that just made Miguel turn on him in fury.

“Is this about your crush again?” He said, seething. “Is that why you messed everything up? Because you wanted me all to yourself? Get over it already. I’m never gonna be into you like that.”

He’d pissed Miguel off again – but in a good way this time. Miguel stopped touching him after that – stopped grabbing his ass or jerking him off or asking him for blowjobs. He probably thought that he was punishing Robby, but Robby preferred it this way.

Sure he missed Miguel’s touch, missed being held like Miguel used to in his good moods. But he finally felt in control of his own body and that made it worth it. Not to mention, now that Miguel was around all the time, things with Hawk died down as well. The next few months ended up being the best for him in that house.

It didn’t last long. Robby hadn’t expected it to. Sooner or later, Miguel was always going to see through the façade. Either that or he’d figure out that there were better ways of hurting him.

Miguel didn’t say anything. He didn’t need to. He just saw Robby looking at him as he changed after getting home from karate and just like that, they were on the same page again. The hunger in Miguel’s eyes was unmistakable and Robby knew he had no way out. He could try to fight, but Miguel would beat him down and shove inside him anyway. Much better to spare himself the pain by keeping him in a good mood.

Robby couldn’t help moving back, couldn’t stop the fear from showing on his face as Miguel loomed over him. But then Miguel started kissing him and he melted in his arms anyway. He reached up, touching Miguel’s bare chest, trailing his hands down his sides before dipping into the waistband of his pants. Robby loosened the string around the waist and they slid down Miguel’s legs down to his knees, leaving him in his black boxer-briefs. Robby rubbed his hand over the bulge in the front, making Miguel moan into his mouth.

First times were never how you imagined the – Tilly had warned him of that. And Robby knew it wouldn’t be. He was too nervous and too tense for it to feel good. He let Miguel take the lead, practically ripping his shirt and shorts off before gently pulling down his underwear and slowly revealing him to sight.

“I missed this.” Miguel whispered, softly sucking at his tip. “You want me to fuck you, right?”

The question was rhetorical. Miguel was going to do it one way or the other. If Robby refused now, Miguel would just call him a tease and take him anyway. So he nodded and Miguel grinned, getting up to get the lube.

They weren’t allowed to have condoms anymore, so Robby knew they’d be doing it raw. Robby just hoped Miguel prepared him well in advance. This wouldn’t be the first time Miguel fingered him and he hoped Miguel remembered what to do.

He did. The first lubed up finger circled his hole for a moment, loosening him up a little, before breaching inside. It started looking for that spot almost immediately. Robby moaned into the pillow and arched his ass up as Miguel found it. He could feel the boy kissing the back of his neck as another hand rubbed circles along the small of his back. Miguel pushed his finger almost all the way in before crooking it and rubbing that spot again. Then he started pistoning it in and out, loosening Robby up for the second one.

Miguel poured some more lube over his crack before pushing in the second one. This time, he used his other hand to start jerking himself and getting ready. He sat back on his haunches, looking down at Robby, examining and admiring him between his spread cheeks and Robby found himself flushing under the weight of that gaze. His fingers twisted and spread, loosening him, preparing him for the real thing.

 _Not enough,_ Robby realized when he felt the blunt tip of Miguel’s cock press against his entrance. He had never truly appreciated how much Tam had done for him that first time – taking his time by slowly licking him open, distracting him and spreading him on three big fingers before his cock ever came near Robby’s hole.

It wasn’t Miguel’s fault. It was his first time too. But Robby didn’t have the courage to object and he didn’t want to show any weakness in front of the guy – so he buried his face in the pillow and bit his lip as Miguel breached him. The stretch and burn of the cock entering him hurt and Miguel didn’t make it any better as he blithely pushed in until he was seated completely inside Robby. Robby’s hands clenched the sheets and he somehow suppressed the scream which came out as a groan instead, but he couldn’t do anything about the tears that escaped the corners of his eyes.

Whether it was to stop himself from cumming too soon or whether it was to give Robby a moment to adjust, he didn’t know. But Miguel paused like that for a bit and Robby was thankful for that much atleast.

But he still started moving too soon, before Robby had really gotten used to the intrusion. He went gently at first, pulling out and pushing in slowly at first, but it still hurt. Robby found himself clenching and spasming around the cock, trying to keep it in place if only for a moment – but Miguel took that for encouragement. He sped up his thrusts, moaning as he slammed into Robby again and again.

It hurt. It hurt so bad that Robby didn’t know how he avoided screaming out a litany of “no’s”. It felt like he was being split apart – torn from inside out. He squealed and mewled in pain, but the sounds were muffled by the pillow under his face.

But the worst part was that Miguel’s cock still kept hitting that spot inside him – which sent up tremors of pleasure amidst the pain and kept his cock hard and leaking. That’s how Miguel found him when he reached down with his hand and started jerking him off. Now Robby could not even deny having enjoyed it.

He prayed that it’d be over soon. Wiggled and clenched and did whatever he could think of to make it so. And thankfully, it was. Miguel gripped his hips hard enough to leave bruises, as he came inside Robby with a groan. His cock engorged and pulsed inside his channel, filling him up. And Miguel finally staying still felt like a relief in itself. So much so that Robby almost didn’t mind as he reached down again and finished him off.

Pulling out hurt in a whole different way. Robby found himself spasming around the sudden emptiness, his ass trying to keep Miguel’s cum inside of him. He collapsed back on the bed and Miguel collapsed behind him, throwing half his body over Robby’s.

“We should’ve done that ages ago.” Miguel whispered. “That was awesome, right? I’ve never heard you make sounds like that.”

Robby didn’t say anything, too busy trying to catch his breath and keep his body from shaking. Miguel took that for agreement and stroked his asscheek before slipping his fingers between them and rubbing soothingly over the asshole and a bit of his spunk slipped out.

He wouldn’t turn around, Robby decided. He wouldn’t let Miguel see his red eyes or his tear-streaked face. He wouldn’t let Miguel know that this was another way he could hurt him. Miguel would be sure to use that against him in the future. So instead, he acted like he’d enjoyed it. He pushed himself deeper into Miguel’s arms, let him wrap his arms around him and kiss his hair while he tried not to focus on his sore asshole.

They’d do it better the next time. Robby already knew there was going to be a next time and he decided that he’d insist on prepping himself. Miguel wasn’t going to object to that, right?


	12. Robby VI

They were giving up on even the pretense of caring, Robby thought as his fifteenth birthday rolled around. Atleast last year, they’d made a show of giving a shit. This year, they weren’t even going to try. Nobody asked him what he wanted to do for the day or what presents he wanted. They were all tired of his shit and they were all finally giving up.

It shouldn’t have hurt him like that. He should’ve been used to it by now. But it still hurt him when nobody wished him at breakfast. Everyone was too busy doing their own thing.

“You going to the skate-park today?” That was the only thing Johnny asked him, nonchalantly.

Robby nodded. That was the one place he still felt happy.

“Good.” His father nodded approvingly. “You need the practice.”

Robby swallowed the retort. Today was not the day he wanted to fight.

The rest of the day before the skate-park was downright miserable. Robby didn’t want to humiliate himself by begging for attention, but he still kept wishing they’d remember. That atleast one of them would suddenly ask what day it was and start apologizing profusely and ask him how they could make it up to him. He even went so far as to drop a hint, but nobody picked up on it.

By the afternoon, he started doubting himself. He started thinking that he was the crazy one and that maybe it wasn’t his birthday after all. After all, atleast his mom should’ve remembered, right? Even if she’d gotten out of rehab a few months ago and never gotten in touch, she would’ve remembered this day. He checked the calendar to make sure that he wasn’t getting the date wrong and then he almost called his mom before stopping at the last moment.

No, he wasn’t going to be that pathetic. He wasn’t going to beg for attention on his own birthday. He’d atleast keep that much of his self-respect. Robby angrily threw his phone at the wall and watched it fall apart on the floor. And then he grabbed his skateboard and stormed out of the house.

* * *

Skating always helped him clear his mind. When he was moving on the board, focusing on getting the moves right, it always felt like all his problems fell away. And today was no different. For a couple of glorious hours, he managed to forget about it all – about his miserable day, about his crappy parents, even what day it was.

But it couldn’t last for ever. He was bone tired after a while and he knew it was time to leave. But he also couldn’t go home. Couldn’t spend one more minute there being ignored and devalued. So he sought out Tilly instead.

She was there on the benches, with Tam, relaxing after a hard day of practice. She’d waved at Robby when he’d gotten there, but at the time, he’d been too pissed off to wave back. He hoped she wouldn’t hold it against him as he approached them.

“Can I hang out with you guys today?” Robby asked without a preamble.

They looked at him with a little consternation.

“Uh… sure.” Tam said uncertainly.

But Tilly shook her head. “Robby, we had a deal.”

“It’s not that.” Robby reassured her. He wasn’t in mood for sex anyway. “I just need to hangout with some sane people today.”

“Something wrong, kid?” Tam asked, getting up and looking worried.

Robby shrugged and shook his head, but that seemed to make them both even more concerned. So Robby decided to go for honesty.

“It’s my birthday and nobody remembered.” Robby said. “And I can’t spend the evening at home pretending that nothing’s wrong.”

“Are you for real?” Tilly asked, her mouth dropping open. Tam just blinked at him.

Robby shrugged.

“Dude, you are messing with us, right?” Tam looked at him skeptically. “No way your parents actually forgot your birthday.”

“It’s just my dad.” Robby replied. “And it wouldn’t be the first time.”

Tilly looked heart-broken, but Tam looked pissed off.

“You should go back.” He said, seething. “Go back and give him a piece of your mind.”

Robby had considered it. He might’ve even done it had he thought it’d change anything. But it was too late for all that now and even these guys didn’t want to hang out with a loser whose own parents couldn’t care about him.

“Never mind.” Robby shrugged and turned to walk away.

“Hey! No. No, no.” Tilly said, standing up and grabbing his arm. “You are hanging out with us tonight. And we are going out and doing something fun. Right, Tam?”

“Yeah.” Tam said, clapping him on the shoulder. “We’ll make this one a night to remember.”

“You sure?” Robby asked. It was a pity-invite. He knew that. But right now, he could do with some pity.

“Don’t whine. It’s not cute.” Tilly told him. “You want to have fun? You need to be in the right headspace.”

As his birthdays went, this wasn’t half-bad. In fact, if not for the miserable first half of the day, it’d have counted as one of the better ones. Robby discovered that Tilly and Tam were fun to be around even when they were not in the bedroom.

They took him on a long drive along the beach in Tam’s convertible and Tilly even let him ride shotgun. Tam wouldn’t let him try to drive though – this wasn’t the girl he was willing to share. They joked and teased and made him laugh along the way, before turning on the music and forcing him to sing-along.

Tilly picked up some food and a few cupcakes from a bakery she liked. It was almost pathetic, celebrating his birthday by blowing out a candle on a cupcake – but somehow they made it feel more intimate and personal. He wondered why she’d gotten four of them and found out that one of them was for his face.

He spent hours with them, parked in a corner close to the beach. Tam had beers in the cooler which were still kinda cold and Tilly had a couple of joints and between that and the food, hours went by without any of them noticing. They talked about everything – almost everything. Robby didn’t want to bring anybody down by talking about his home-life – so he talked about school instead. And so did they – about Tam’s early acceptance into college and Tilly’s plans on going pro.

Robby learned a few things about himself that night. Things he hadn’t expected to learn. He’d never told anyone at school about that night with them, but Tilly had and so had Tam. They hadn’t publicized it – they’d just told a few close, trusted friends that they’d spent a great night with Robby and somehow the story had spread anyway. By the time it’d reached the fringes, it’d grown into something unrecognizable. Apparently, the whole senior class was now under the impression that Robby had gotten Tilly off with his tongue and then twice more with his cock before doing the same to Tam.

“That’s insane.” Robby laughed. “I barely did anything. Why did nobody ask me about it?”

“You played it smart, dude.” Tam told him. “You acted like nothing happened. It’d have been different if you’d gone around bragging about it.”

Robby felt a twinge of discomfort at that. He hadn’t planned on any of this. And it was always the girl who got branded a slut in these cases, right?

“I can take care of myself.” Tilly reassured him.

“She really can.” Tam agreed. “She’s bit of a cautionary tale around the school, actually.”

That was a story Robby had never heard before. Apparently, Tilly had started having sex in her own freshman year and that had given some guys the idea that she was easy. One of the jocks had been bold enough to approach her right in the middle of the school-day, "kindly" offering to let her suck his cock.

“Let’s see it then.” Tilly had said, folding her arms. “Show me what I’m working with.”

The guy had been flabbergasted, not used to dealing with girls this in-your-face.

“S-sure.” He’d stumbled over his words. “You can, uh, come over after and - ”

“Don’t waste my time asshole.” Tilly had replied. “Either drop your pants right now or walk away.”

That had left him flustered and indignant, unable to formulate a coherent reply. Tilly had scoffed and turned around, but the guy had made the mistake of grabbing her arm. He never saw the skateboard swinging up, but he sure felt it.

“Did no one ever teach you not to touch a girl without her permission?” Tilly had shouted as everyone stared, kicking him in the groin as he lay there on the ground, groaning in pain.

The guy had ended up with six stitches and a reputation as a perv who got his ass kicked by a girl half his size. There was no coming back from that. And since then, nobody had dared talked to Tilly like that again.

“You are messing with me, right?” Robby said, half-smiling. “And that really keeps guys away?”

“Ask that guy in your class – the one with the weird hair.” Tilly suggested.

“Hawk?” Robby was surprised.

“Is that really his name?” Tam asked, laughing.

“He must have heard about you.” Tilly told him. “He came around, kind of asking if I’d sleep with him. Good thing Katie was there to drag him away or he’d have gotten a second scar on his face that day.”

Robby laughed. Maybe that explained part of Hawk’s hatred towards him.

* * *

They dropped him back home at around eleven – almost two and half hours past the curfew. He was buzzed and high and finally feeling good about the day. They offered to let him sleep over, but he firmly refused. He’d taken too much advantage of their generosity already.

Any other day, he’d have been shaking in fear getting back home so late. But today, he was beyond caring. Let them get pissed off – he’d more than enough reason to be pissed off at them too. Besides, they probably didn’t even notice that he was gone until dinnertime.

There was only a single light on in the living room when Robby got in and half of Johnny’s face was shrouded in darkness. He had a glass of scotch in his hand and by the looks of it, it wasn’t his first one.

“Where were you?” Johnny asked. His voice was calm, but Robby could sense the undercurrent of anger there.

“Out. With friends.” Robby replied, not giving a shit.

“We were waiting for you.” Johnny said. “We kept calling you over and over.”

“I broke my phone.” Robby shrugged.

“Yeah – found that after about an hour of trying.” Johnny told him. “What the hell, Robby? That thing was expensive.”

“Whatever.” Robby shrugged, heading towards his room.

“Hey! We are not done here.” Johnny said sternly. “This was supposed to be a great evening. We were planning this for weeks.”

Robby turned around and blinked. _What?_

“We did all this for you.” Johnny said. “The least you could’ve done is shown up.”

Robby noticed the room for the first time. Balloons were stuck to the wall with streamers hanging in between. A pile of wrapped presents in the corner. A banner with the words “Happy Birthday, Robby!” written in bold. And a large cake with white frosting on the table.

“What the hell is all this?” Robby asked, nonplussed.

“It was supposed to be a surprise party.” Johnny explained. “Your surprise party. We worked on this for weeks. Everyone was here, waiting for you to get back from the skate-park. We went looking for you when you didn’t show up and someone told us that you’d already left with somebody else. We waited for hours – but then, everyone just had to go home.”

“Bullshit.” Robby said. It was a trick. Johnny had remembered at some point and felt guilty about forgetting, so he put all this to turn the tables on Robby. “You didn’t even know what day it was all day.”

“You thought I actually forgot your birthday?” Johnny asked, heartbroken. “Robby, I’d never…”

He didn’t finish that sentence, but Robby did it for him anyway.

“Wouldn’t be the first time.”

Johnny sighed. “Well, I didn’t this time.”

Robby valiantly tried to suppress the guilt bubbling up inside of him. _He is not putting this one on me. I spent the whole day alone and miserable because he made me feel that way. He doesn’t get to make me feel guilty for having a good time – for doing what I could to cheer myself up. How was I supposed to know they had all this planned?_

It wasn’t working though. Robby had really screwed up this time. If he’d just come home, things would’ve been better. And he couldn’t think of a single way to justify that.

“We were all here, waiting for you.” Johnny went on, sadly. “All your friends.”

“What friends?” Robby latched on to that ray of hope.

“Guys from your class.” Johnny told him. “Hawk, Mitch, Chris, Red, Tony… even Tory.”

 _Right, ofcourse._ This was something he could use.

“You mean guys from Cobra-Kai.” Robby said, flatly. “Those guys aren’t _my_ friends. They are Miguel’s. My friends were all at the skate-park with me today. Maybe you’d have known that if you actually gave a shit.”

Johnny blinked, unable to think of anything to say and Robby grabbed on to the lifeline. He had no reason to feel guilty after all. This surprise party – it didn’t mean that Johnny actually cared. It was just a gesture to make himself feel better for having done something. That wasn’t about Robby at all.

“This party wasn’t for me.” Robby continued. “I hate those guys. And they hate me. Miguel would’ve had fun tonight, but I’d have just ended up sitting in the corner alone. I’m glad I skipped that. I had a lot more fun with my _real_ friends who weren’t invited either.”

“Robby, c’mon…” Johnny pleaded.

“You know? Next time, don’t use me as an excuse.” Robby finished. “Just go ahead and have your party whether I’m there or not.”

Johnny sighed, picking up the small wrapped box on the table and tossing it to Robby.

“Well, happy birthday, anyway.” He said. “It’s a new phone. Thought it was time for an upgrade. Pretty fitting, huh?”

Robby didn’t say anything as Johnny picked up the cake and went to put it in the fridge.

* * *

Nobody knew exactly how to feel about that day or how to deal with it. Part of them was angry at Robby for just disappearing on them, for making them worry, for rendering their grand gesture completely meaningless. And another part felt guilty for making him miserable, for making him feel like that they hadn’t cared and for pushing him to the point where he felt like he couldn’t come home.

Robby didn’t know how to feel either. Part of him was still ravaged with guilt. No matter what their motivations, the gesture itself meant something right? But another part felt a sick sense of satisfaction for turning the tables on them. For making them pay for the cruel trick they’d played on him.

Ultimately, they all collectively decided to act like the night hadn’t happened. They cut the cake next morning and gave him the presents, acting like that was the continuation of his birthday and Robby smiled and thanked them for the surprise. It was a pathetic, pointless display, but it let everyone pretend that things were fine and allowed them to move on from this disaster.

 _Was Robby right though?_ Johnny wondered. _Do I not actually know my son?_

If Robby’s friends from the skate-park had been there at the party, then they wouldn’t have taken him out somewhere else and Robby would’ve returned in time.

But who were these friends? Johnny had never even heard their names. Were they even real? He had looked in on Robby at the skate-park a couple of times and he’d always found him skating alone. There had always been groups of other people, hanging around and talking to each-other, but he’d never seen any of them talk to Robby.

And he had really thought that Robby was friends with Hawk and others. They were always hanging around the house, they were always in the boys’ bedroom with Robby and Miguel.

But maybe that wasn’t how it worked. He hadn’t actually seen Robby talk to any of them after all. Maybe Robby didn’t hang out with them after all – at best, he hung out around them.

Maybe Robby didn’t have any friends after all and somehow, despite living together for more than a year, Johnny had completely missed that fact. 


	13. Robby VII

It wasn’t fair. The skate-park was his place – his sanctuary. A place he could go to to get away from it all. Those assholes had no right to just walk in and take over like that. He didn’t go to their dojo to skate, did he?

“C’mon!” Tilly yelled as she crashed into Mitch the second time. “Stay out of the pit, asshole!”

“Hey! The park doesn’t belong to you.” Hawk shouted back.

Robby tried to ignore them and focus on getting the move right, but that just didn’t seem possible. The whole place seemed way too crowded and this had been happening for a few weeks now.

He saw Tilly give him a dirty look before going back to practice and he looked at her helplessly. _Don’t blame me. I don’t want them here any more than you do. Just because I know them doesn’t mean they are my friends._

“It’s a great place to practice.” Miguel told him when he asked what they were doing there. “We really need to up our game for the tournament and the dojo with all the safety nets was just not cutting it.”

 _Bullshit,_ Robby thought. Sure the logic checked out on the surface. It was called the All-Valley Under-18 but you still had to be 14 years old to participate. It wouldn’t be fair pitting big high-schoolers against ten-year olds. Miguel had just missed the mark last year, but at almost fifteen now, he was ready to participate and determined to win.

And judging by the conversations around the dinner table, he actually had a chance this year. Some huge guy from Cobra Kai had held the title for the past two years, but he was over 18 now and no longer eligible. Sure, there were other older and bigger guys from Cobra Kai taking part as well, but according to Johnny, Miguel was good enough to take them on.

And that’s what made Robby certain that this excuse was bullshit. Cobra Kai had been winning tournaments for ages and the students hadn’t needed any “real-world training” before today – so why now? This was just another way for them to mess with him.

“We are all going out to the mall after the skate-park today.” Miguel told him one afternoon. “You wanna come with?”

“To hang out with your ‘friends’?” Robby scoffed. “I’ll pass.”

“It’s not like you have any of your own to hang out with.” Miguel said, annoyed.

Robby scowled at him. Sure he was friendly with a lot of people, but he didn’t have any close friends. He was always scared of getting too close to people, scared of being humiliated in front of them by Miguel or Hawk.

“I’d rather be alone than spend time with those assholes.” Robby said, turning away.

Miguel sighed in frustration before trying a different angle.

“Just give them a chance, okay?” He said. “They are not so bad once you get to know them.”

Robby scoffed but didn’t say anything.

“Could you just meet us halfway here?” Miguel pleaded. “I’m trying to get you to make friends.”

Robby stared at him, surprised. “Why?”

“Because I don’t want a repeat of your birthday, okay? Why do you think we’ve been coming to the skate-park all this time?”

Was Robby missing something here? What did that have to do with anything?

“Look, that day was messed up. Dad was trying to do something nice for you and it all got fucked up.” _Because of you,_ Miguel didn’t say those words, but Robby saw it in his eyes anyway. “We wanted to invite your friends but you don’t have any to invite. Like even at the skate-park, you don’t really talk to anyone. And I’ve never seen you hang out with anyone from school.”

 _And whose fault is that?_ Robby thought, irate. _Hawk has been spreading stories about me and people are too scared of you and your friends to get near me._

“I just figured, if you hang out with us every now and then…” Miguel trailed off.

“What? I’ll join Cobra Kai and become best buddies with you guys?” Robby asked.

“No. You are not into karate. We get it.” Miguel said. “But you can still be friends with those guys, right?”

“It’s not about karate.” Did Miguel really not get it? “Those guys are assholes to me.”

“They used to be. But they haven’t picked on you for a while, right?” Miguel said. “That’s because I told them not to.”

“Yeah, right!” Robby scoffed. “Don’t pretend to be some kind of hero. They did messed up stuff to me right in front of you and you stood by and did nothing. Don’t act like you didn’t enjoy that.”

Miguel looked guilty at that.

“I’m sorry about that.” He said, abashed. “But I put a stop to it.”

Robby frowned. Was that how it worked? They bullied him when Miguel wanted them to and stopped when he revoked the permission? So how long would it be before Miguel changed his mind again?

“And dad talked to them too.” Miguel continued. “Told them they had to be nice to you. That you not being part of Cobra Kai was no excuse to pick on you.”

 _He did?_ Robby blinked. Johnny had never cared about his social life before. Because he’d never cared about how Robby actually felt. Was this out of guilt?

And did that matter? Whatever the reason, they were trying to make things better for him, right? So maybe he could meet them halfway?

“You can’t hang out at the skate-park anymore.” Robby said, testing the waters. “People go there to actually practice skating and all of you running around keeps getting in the way.”

Miguel pursed his lips, but nodded anyway.

“Alright.” Robby conceded. “I can hang out with you guys later.”

* * *

He gave it his best shot – he really did. But they made it impossible from day one.

It wasn’t that bad when they were all hanging out in a group together. Robby could just stay quiet and fly beneath the radar like he always did. Sure Miguel encouraged him to participate every now and then, but no one actually cared when he wouldn’t. Miguel was still trying to change him – make him more like himself, but Robby hadn’t given in so far and he wasn’t about to now. If these guys really wanted to be his friends, then they could take him as he was or leave him. That was as far as he was willing to go.

But they didn’t actually want to be his friends. They were just putting up with him because Johnny had told them to. Hawk made that clear that very afternoon at the movies.

“Knew you’d follow me.” Hawk said when Robby found him at the urinal stall.

Robby felt a chill go through him. He hadn’t noticed Hawk go to the bathroom and he hadn’t thought twice about getting up and going himself. But now they were here together – and alone – with everyone else too busy watching the movie. He hadn’t been alone with Hawk for months – not since Miguel broke up with Tory.

“Don’t flatter yourself.” Robby said, trying to sound casual as he took the stall furthest from Hawk and unzipped himself.

It’d be fine, he told himself, closing his eyes and pissing. Even Hawk wouldn’t be stupid enough to try something in a public place like this. Anyone could walk in at any time. Besides, Johnny had told him to be nicer to Robby, right?

He was almost done when he felt a hand grab his ass and Hawk’s warm breath against his neck.

“I missed this ass.” Hawk whispered in his ear, squeezing a fistful. “We had some fun times with this, right?”

“Don’t you have a girlfriend for this shit now?” Robby asked, trying not to show any fear.

“Moon doesn’t put out like you do.” Hawk replied.

Hawk slipped his hand inside the back of his jeans and Robby could feel his fingers running along the crack.

“Sensei said we were supposed to be nicer to you.” He whispered, pushing a finger against his hole. “Want me to make you feel good again?”

“Don’t think he was talking about this.” Robby said. He really should move, push Hawk away, run out of there, do something. He was giving Hawk the wrong idea by just standing there.

“That’s because he doesn’t know you are a fag who just loves taking it up the ass.” Hawk replied.

He grabbed Robby’s stiffening cock with the other hand and jerked at it playfully. That snapped Robby out of it. He slapped his hand away and quickly pushed himself back in, zipping himself up.

“Quit it.” He snapped.

Hawk looked taken aback for a moment, but then he smiled.

“You are right. Not the right place.” He said, smirking and patting Robby’s crotch. “We’ll find some time to do this right.”

He left Robby there, oblivious to his anger. But it wasn’t Hawk Robby was pissed at. It was Johnny and Miguel. This was all an empty gesture after all. They didn’t really care about Robby making friends – they were only trying to make themselves feel better about having tried.

Sure, Johnny didn’t know the whole truth, but Miguel did. He knew about the shit Hawk had done to him. Hell, he’d put him up to it himself. He should’ve known that Robby wouldn’t want anything to do with the guy and he could’ve told Johnny atleast that much. But instead, they were giving Hawk the chance to start that shit all over again.

His worst fears were confirmed that night at dinner.

“I don’t see why I have to be friends with those guys.” Robby told Johnny that night. “All they do is talk shit about me.”

“That’s how guys bond. By talking shit about each-other.” Johnny replied. “Just give it some time, alright? They are all good kids. You’ll like them once you get to know them.”

“They are bullies.” Robby insisted sullenly.

“Nobody hurt you, right?” Johnny looked concerned for a moment. “Miguel?”

Miguel looked uncertain as well. “Just regular guy stuff.”

Technically true, sure. Tony had grabbed him in a headlock and mussed his hair. Hawk had pinched his sides, making him jump. It’d been pretty tame compared to the stuff they did to each-other – and Robby wouldn’t have minded as much if not for the deeper meaning behind it.

“It just makes me uncomfortable.” He said. Wasn’t that good enough? Did he have to hang out with people who made him feel uncomfortable just to make Johnny feel better? If Johnny really wanted him to make more friends, couldn’t he let him do it on his terms?

Apparently not.

“You can’t go around being that sensitive, okay?” He said, smiling in relief. “Guys do that shit. Doesn’t mean anything. You’ll get used to it, you’ll see.”

But he didn’t want to get used to it – couldn’t Johnny see that?

And he was never going to get used to _this._ With how much he was being forced to hang out with them, there were plenty of times he found himself alone with one or more of them. And they never wasted an opportunity to mess with them – sometimes even when Miguel was right there.

Like the time Tony was showing off his muscles – posing and flexing for them shirtless.

“Wanna take a picture Robby?” He teased. “Add these guns to your spank bank?”

Robby flushed at being caught staring and both Miguel and Hawk laughed.

“I’ve seen better.” Robby deflected, but Tony didn’t buy it.

He pounced on the smaller boy and pushed his chest into his face, rubbing his cheeks over his pecs.

“Ever felt better?” He asked, “Feel that? Better than Miguel, right? He’s a skinny little twink.”

He felt another hand snake between his legs and grab his growing bulge.

“Feels like he likes it.” He heard Hawk say.

“Alright. That’s enough.” Miguel snapped, slapping Hawk’s hand away and pulling Tony off Robby. “Stop messing with him.”

_Unless you want them to, right?_

* * *

Hawk was by far the worst. Since he was Miguel’s best friend, nobody looked twice at him when he showed up to hang out at their house. And if Miguel wasn’t around, he just ended up spending time with Robby.

Maybe he was being nicer than before. He wasn’t beating Robby up anymore. Wasn’t slapping him around or calling him names. Maybe he even genuinely thought that Robby liked what he did to him. But the way he just overrode Robby’s objections every time made it clear that he didn’t actually think of them as friends, no matter what he said.

“I got you a present.” Hawk whispered conspirationally one afternoon.

The tournament was close and Miguel was out with Johnny that day, getting custom Cobra-Kai gi’s made for the whole dojo. Carmen and Rosa were out visiting relatives, which made it a perfect time for Hawk to corner Robby in his own home.

“I wanted to give it to you on your birthday, but you messed that day up.” He continued, grinning ear to ear. “Thought I’d save it for the next one, but I just can’t wait anymore.”

He pressed the small, black thing that felt like it was made of velvet rubber into Robby’s hand. It was something L-shaped with bulging bulbs on either end.

“What the hell is this?” Robby asked, perplexed.

“It’s a sex-toy.” Hawk explained. “This end goes up your ass,” He stroked the longer part, “and this one between your legs. It’s supposed to feel great.”

Robby stared at the thing open-mouthed. Was Hawk serious?

“That’s not all.” Hawk continued, taking out a small black thing and pressing it. The plug started humming in Robby’s hand and he dropped it in surprise. Hawk laughed as he picked it up and waved it in Robby’s face.

“It’s gonna feel awesome.” He said. “Wanna take it for a ride.”

“Maybe later.” Robby tried to deflect.

“Don’t be a dick.” Hawk frowned. “It’s not just a gift for you, okay? Miguel’s gonna love it too.”

“I said, not now, alright?” Robby said, pushing him away.

Hawk got that angry look on his face that always meant trouble.

“You just love being a tease, don’t you?” He said, taking up the challenge. “Okay, hard way it is.”

Robby hated how weak he had become. How he didn’t even have the courage to run away anymore. How he didn’t even put up a token resistance as Hawk pushed him to the bed and twisted his arms behind his back.

“Trust me, you’ll love this.” He said as he pulled Robby’s shirt over his head and used the tangled sleeves to tie his hands behind his back. “And so will Miguel. When he finds you like this – all sloppy and loose and plugged up, he’ll just take it out and slip right in.”

Hawk was almost gentle as he pulled his shorts off and rubbed two fingers along his crack. Robby controlled his breathing as he pushed his cheeks apart and the fingers returned, coated with lube this time. Two of them pushed in at once, making Robby jerk in anticipation, but Hawk held him in place with a hand on his back.

They’d barely started stretching him before Hawk pulled them out and Robby felt the bulging head of the plug in its place, pushing at the rim. Robby clenched, anticipating the pain. He wasn’t stretched enough and the plug wasn’t exactly small. But Hawk gave up after gently probing a little and didn’t try to force it in.

“Relax, dude.” He said, rubbing circles along Robby’s back. “I told you I’m not gonna hurt you.”

The fingers were back, with more lube this time, pushing in and stretching him. Robby kept trying to relax, but something in him kept making him clench up. But he started loosening up anyway once Hawk found that spot inside and pressed against it. He chuckled as Robby squirmed and wiggled his ass in his face and pulled his fingers out again.

“Think you are ready.” He said, pushing the slick end of the plug against him again.

It went in this time, Robby’s opening stretching around the bulb before closing in on around the narrower base. It practically slid inside him until Robby could feel the other end between his legs, pressed against his taint.

It wasn’t that bad. It actually felt quite pleasant, having his prostate stimulated from both sides. But then, that had never been the problem. It was the humiliation of it all that Robby hated – the way he always found himself, bent over, legs, spread, hard and leaking and waiting to be used. And for some reason, it felt like this was going to be worse.

“Ready?” He could hear the excitement in Hawk’s voice and the guy didn’t wait for an answer before switching the thing on.

Robby gasped. It felt different. Nothing like fingers pressing against him. Not even like a cock jabbing into that spot. The vibrations were pleasurable, but the constant, unrelenting nature of them made it almost uncomfortable. It certainly didn’t help that Hawk kept fiddling with the remote, changing the pace so Robby couldn’t even get used to the rhythm.

He moaned and writhed against the mattress. He tried to push it out, but only managed to press it harder against his prostrate. The incessant humming made him uncomfortably hard and he couldn’t seem to find any relief no matter how much he rubbed against the mattress. He was getting close to tears now, but he was reduced to begging before that happened.

“Please just take it out.” He cried and Hawk looked a little confused.

“Don’t be a pussy. You like this.” He said, reaching his hand down and grabbing his hard cock.

That was all it took in the end. The moment Hawk’s fist closed around his length, Robby came with a cry. He sobbed his way through the orgasm, but managed to control himself once it was over.

“See? Told you it was gonna be awesome.” Hawk grinned as he unceremoniously pulled the plug out.

Robby stayed there, exhausted and boneless as Hawk pushed into his sore hole. He barely made a noise as Hawk fucked him, using his own cum as lube. Robby didn’t move at all, but Hawk didn’t seem to care, pistoning in and out of him like a bunny in heat.

He came with a moan, spilling inside Robby and he realized that Hawk hadn’t worn a rubber this time. The reason became clear soon enough as he pulled out and easily pushed the plug back in. He could feel Hawk’s cum sloshing inside him and the plug was meant to keep it in.

“Just keep it there.” Hawk told him, undoing his sleeves and releasing his arms. “Miguel’s gonna love this, fucking you with my cum still inside you.”

* * *

Robby hated Hawk. But more than that, he hated himself for being weak and pathetic. For getting off on it. For going along with it even when he had no reason to. Sure, Hawk and Miguel had planned this together – planned on taking turns using him. Or even if they hadn’t, Miguel was going to appreciate Hawk’s gift anyway.

But there was no reason why Robby should’ve gone along with it. Hawk had left him after making him put his clothes on with the plug still inside him – and he should’ve just showered and cleaned himself out as soon as the guy was gone. Instead, he’d waited, feeling filled-up and spread apart on that thing inside of him.

What could Miguel have done? Beat him up for not following Hawk’s orders? Spanked him? That would’ve been better than spending those hours in discomfort. But the thought hadn’t even occurred to him. He felt compelled to obey Miguel’s unspoken orders and he didn’t realize he never actually had to until he heard the front door open.

He was pissed off with himself. More than he’d been in a long, long time. He’d never hated himself more than he did in that moment – lying on the bed on his front with a that thing up his ass. He wasn’t going to make it easy for Miguel, he decided. Not this time. It was going to hurt this time too – but that was nothing new. But atleast this time, he’d make Miguel hurt too.

“What took you so long?” He snapped as Miguel came into the room.

“Sorry, lots to do.” Miguel replied, a little confused. “Were you waiting for me or something?”

“Yeah.” Robby replied getting up. “Where’s dad?”

“Uh… still out. Won’t be back for a while.” Miguel was perplexed by Robby’s uncharacteristic aggression.

“Good. Then we won’t be disturbed.” Robby said, taking his shirt off.

Miguel grinned, pulling his own shirt off and Robby seized the chance. The tee was still tangled in his arms when Robby punched him – thumb under the fist like Miguel had taught him. Miguel stumbled and fell back, stunned. He raised a hand to his face, wiping off his bloody lip and looking at it in surprise.

“Robby, what’s wrong?” He asked, getting up.

Robby swung at him again, but Miguel was ready this time. He moved easily, blocking and throwing Robby aside. Robby came back swinging and Miguel dodged and weaved, still not hitting him. He moved back, leading Robby closer, before grabbing his arms, swinging him around and slamming him against the wall.

“That’s enough.” He yelled in his face. “What’s going on with you?”

_No, you don’t get to act like the concerned good guy. You want to hurt me? Then hurt me. Don’t act like you care while doing it._

Robby surged forward, catching Miguel’s lips in a kiss until their teeth clicked together. Miguel let out a surprised sound and was too stunned to do anything until Robby bit down where he was already bleeding. He slammed Robby back against the wall then.

“What the hell dude?” He asked, getting angry now.

“Got you a fucking gift.” Robby said. “You gonna fuck me or not?”

“Not when you are like this.” Miguel replied, looking a little scared.

“Pussy.” Robby sneered and slammed his forehead right into Miguel’s face.

Miguel cursed and stumbled backwards, clutching at his nose where Robby’s head-butt had gotten him. Robby looked in satisfaction at the blood spilling from between his fingers and swung forward again.

Miguel was still the better fighter though. Almost as if on instinct, he dodged Robby’s punch and his own caught Robby square on the jaw, making him see stars for a moment. He shook his head clear and swung around again, only to get his arm caught before Miguel buried his knee in his gut, making the air go out of him in a whoosh.

He wanted to fall to his knees, but somehow kept himself upright and tried to tackle Miguel instead. Miguel rolled with it, grabbing and turning him around before pushing him to the floor and with a knee on his back, keeping him there.

“Is this what you want?” Miguel hissed. “For me to beat you up and then fuck you?”

“Yes!” Robby wheezed back. That’s what his body wanted, right? That’s what he got off on – on the pain and humiliation? No point in denying it anymore.

“Alright.” Miguel said, yanking his shorts down.

He seemed to freeze then, still looming over Robby and looking down at his ass. Or more precisely, at the plug nestled between his cheeks. His hand reached down, tentatively pressing at it, before tugging and turning it, making Robby hiss out a moan.

“How long were you waiting for me?” He asked, quietly.

“Three hours.” Robby spat back.

“Wow! You must be on edge already.” Miguel said twisting the plug more confidently now. “Is that what this is about?”

Robby moaned in pain as Miguel twisted it harder and swung his arm back, his elbow catching Miguel on the side of his head. Miguel fell aside with a grunt but was back on Robby before he could get up, pinning him down with a hand on his neck this time.

“You asked for it.” He growled, unbuttoning himself one-handed and pushing his jeans and underwear down his thighs.

Robby yelped when Miguel roughly pulled the plug out, the bulging head catching painfully at his rim, and threw it aside. He felt the familiar, blunt head of Miguel’s cock in its place moments later. Miguel entered him easily – sliding home into the slick open channel in one swift motion. Robby sobbed and canted his hips back, taking him in deeper.

If Miguel knew that someone had already been there, if he figured out that it was Hawk’s residue he could feel slicking up his cock, then he didn’t mention it. He just pulled out almost all the way through and then slammed in home again. He grabbed Robby’s hips in a bruising grip, lifting him up and angling his cock to hit that spot inside him. Robby involuntarily spread his legs wider, giving Miguel better and deeper access.

“Feel that?” He asked.

Robby cried and swung his arm back again, but Miguel was ready for him this time. He caught it mid-air and twisted it behind him, pinning it to the small of his back. Miguel grabbed his neck with the other and held him down, pushing his face into the floor. And then kept reaming his ass with brutal thrusts.

Too much. It was all too much. Hawk had already used him hard and put him away wet. He had left him raw and sensitive and spent. And now Miguel was pushing him way beyond the limit.

Miguel came with a deep groan and Robby found himself getting filled up for the second time that day. He almost collapsed on top of the prone boy before holding himself up with one hand. Then, as a regained balance, he stroked Robby’s side and reached around, grabbing his soft cock. Miguel’s hand froze there, confusedly tugging at the flaccid member.

“Robby, what the hell?” Miguel whispered, perplexed.

“Get off me!” Robby growled, disentangling himself and pushing off the floor.

He’d done it and he felt proud of that. He had taken the pain and discomfort and the humiliation and he hadn’t given in. He hadn’t begged for mercy. They won’t break him – not again. They could beat him up and take turns fucking him and he’d take it all without giving an inch.

He gave Miguel a scornful look as Miguel looked back up at him, scared and confused.

“What’s wrong, man?” He asked.

Robby didn’t bother replying. Miguel knew the answer already and if he couldn’t see what was wrong with the whole picture, explaining it wouldn’t do any good. He limped over to the closet grabbed a towel, wrapping it around his waist, before leaving for the much-needed shower.

* * *

They barely got away with it. Carmen was pissed when she saw the bruises, but Johnny managed to talk her down.

Not that Robby cared at the moment. That particular day he was willing to destroy everything, tell Johnny the whole truth if he’d asked him. But ofcourse, he asked Miguel instead.

“I lost my temper and we got into a fight.” Miguel covered for him. “He just gets too much sometimes.”

Ofcourse, Johnny didn’t buy that. He told Robby as much later. There was no way Robby could’ve given Miguel those bruises unless Miguel let him. Or unless he sucker-punched the guy.

“You don’t think I can fight back?” Robby scowled at his father.

“Not unless you’ve been taking secret karate lessons from someone.” Johnny replied. “Look, I’m not pissed. Guys living together get mad at each-other every now and then and they end up fighting. That’s okay as long as you guys make up afterwards and let things go. Take a few days to cool down if you need to – but I want you to apologize to Miguel after that and I don’t want a repeat of this. Got it?”

Robby didn’t say anything. This was pretty much what he’d expected, after all. Miguel could do no wrong and somehow, it always ended up being his fault. He almost bought it himself that night when Miguel talked to him about it.

“Does it hurt?” He asked.

“What do you think?” Robby replied, curtly.

He almost felt guilty when he felt Miguel rub his ass comfortingly.

“I don’t know why you’d make me do something like that.” Miguel said, softly.

 _You asshole,_ Robby thought angrily. _I didn’t make you do anything. You could’ve stopped at any moment. Just gotten up and walked away and told me that you didn’t want to do it like this. You did it because you wanted to._

“Because you make me hang out with your asshole friends.” Robby told him instead.

Miguel paused, thinking.

“Hawk was here today, right?” He asked, concerned. “Did he say something? Or-or do something?”

_You know goddamn well what he did._

“Just his usual shit.”

“He won’t hurt you. Not really.” Miguel insisted. “He’s really just trying to be nice to you. He can cross the line sometimes, but you can tell me if he does and I’ll take care of it.”

 _Just trying to be nice?_ Was that really how he saw it all? Maybe he did. He didn’t have any problem doing the same thing after all. And telling him that Robby hated it would be useless. He’d just accuse him of being a bitch and make it all his fault.

“Tell him to stay the fuck away from me.” Robby said, ending the conversation.


	14. Robby VIII

It was supposed to be a celebration and Robby had been dreading that. He’d hated the idea of all the Cobras gathered together under their roof and he was prepared to spend the night miserable. But it was just the family that night and they weren’t in the mood to celebrate anything.

“You still did great, honey.” Carmen comforted Miguel. “Second place your very first time is nothing to be ashamed of.”

“Second place is for losers.” Miguel scowled at his plate.

“Hey! Don’t talk like that.” Johnny said sharply. “You fought well and you fought with honor. And I’m proud of you for that. That makes you a winner in my book.”

It was more than just not winning the tournament. Robby could see that much clear as day. And for the first time, he was sorry to have missed it.

He’d been too angry – too pissed off to even pretend to even pretend to support Cobra Kai or Miguel. And they’d all been so certain of their victory. Cobra Kai had won the tournament for past four years and no other dojo had any contender this year. If not Miguel, Johnny was still confident that another of his students would win and he had even given Miguel a speech about individual victory did not matter as long as their team won.

Robby had been glad of his decision to have skipped the Cobra Kai jerkfest, but now it looked like something had completely turned the tables on them.

“That shit wasn’t fair, okay?” Miguel insisted. “It should be against the rules.”

“Yeah, well, guys like him make the rules and guys like us have to follow them.” Johnny said angrily.

Robby frowned. That didn’t make sense. There was no way Miguel’s opponent would be allowed to make the rules, right?

“Who are we talking about?” He asked, unable to hold in his curiosity any longer.

“Daniel LaRusso.” Johnny replied. “He’s on the tournament committee.”

Daniel LaRusso? He’d heard that name before. Many times and in pretty much the same tone.

“Isn’t LaRusso the guy who - ?”

“Yes.” Johnny cut him off tersely. He still didn’t like talking about it, unless he was the one bringing it up.

“He has had it out for us for ages.” Miguel said, still scowling. “First it was making ridiculous rules to try and disqualify us and now he found the perfect way to cheat.”

Robby almost would’ve felt bad – had it not been for the fact that he hated Cobra Kai with every fiber of his being. Still, Miguel had worked really hard this year and losing because your opponent cheated was just…

“Nobody cheated, okay?” Carmen said, trying to suppress a smile. “There was nothing against the rules in it.”

“There should be!” Miguel insisted.

“Yeah, there should be.” Johnny agreed. “That shit shouldn’t be allowed.”

Carmen shook her head, trying not to laugh and Robby looked between them confused. He was still missing something. The guys should’ve had the final word on anything karate related, but for some reason, Carmen sounded like she knew what she was talking about here.

“Can someone catch me up?” He asked.

For a moment, it looked like they were going to turn on him for not being there to support Miguel, but they let it go.

“LaRusso made Sam take part in the tournament and she won.” Miguel snapped at him. “Miyagi-Do won the tournament participating for the first time in over thirty years and with just one student. There – all caught up?”

Sam? As in Samantha LaRusso? The girl was the same age as them – in the same class. _She_ won the tournament? And that too during _her_ first time? And she beat _Miguel_ to do it?

Now Robby was really sorry that he missed that.

Robby had seen her around at school, hanging out with the other pretty and popular girls. And she did seem pretty nice. He’d even had a bit of a crush on her at start – and so had Miguel. But Johnny’s history with her father made her a no-fly zone. Not that he’d have had a chance to begin with. Not when she was a popularity tier above Miguel and the other Cobras.

He’d had no idea that she was even into karate, let alone good at it.

“That was really messed up.” Johnny murmured. “Making a girl take part in a boys’ competition.”

“It’s not a boys’ competition. There is nothing in the rules against girls taking part.” Carmen insisted. “Just because it didn’t happen before doesn’t mean it shouldn’t. Girls deserve the same opportunities as boys.”

“C’mon, mom, even you have see how messed up this is.” Miguel argued. “On one hand, you tell us to treat girls equally. On the other we are not supposed to raise a hand to them. Because that would make me an asshole who hits girls. So how the hell am I supposed to win when I can’t hit the enemy?”

“I didn’t say that.” Carmen replied.

“Oh? So it’s okay to hit girls now? Is that what you are telling me?” Miguel threw back.

“It’s okay _sometimes._ ” Carmen said carefully. “It’s not about gender, alright? It’s not okay to beat up someone weaker than you in general. But at something like a tournament, where everyone is participating to show their skills, you are actually disrespecting your opponent if you don’t give it your best.”

She got them, Robby thought. She’d been careful, measured and rational and she made an argument they couldn’t possibly refute. But Johnny tried anyway.

“It’s not that simple, okay.” He argued. “You are not thinking all those big thoughts when you are in a fight. You are just going on your instincts there and I train these boys to be good guys. Ofcourse they are not gonna go all out against a girl. LaRusso knew that and he took advantage of it.”

“He wouldn’t have been able to if you allowed girls in Cobra Kai.” Carmen shot back, grinning in her victory.

Robby stared at Johnny as he blinked, processing what he’d just heard. Carmen had him, totally and completely and they both knew it. All of Johnny’s excuses about girls being too weak for karate wouldn’t work – not after a girl had beaten his prize student. Sure Miguel might’ve held back, but Sam wouldn’t have made her way through the ranks to get to him unless she had actual skill.

Seemed like two Cobras got owned by girls today.

“You are right.” Johnny said, nodding. “Guess I need to get a few girls in my dojo. Make sure LaRusso can’t pull the same shit again.”

Robby hadn’t said anything all this time, he realized. He’d fallen quiet after the question and now he felt like he should say something. Say what though? He decided to go with the first thing that came to his mind.

“So you got your ass kicked by a girl, huh?”

* * *

He should’ve seen this coming. The entire Cobra Kai class felt humiliated, after all. They’d all lost more than a few respect points after losing to a girl. Summer was almost upon them and school would be out in about a week – and all of them hoped that this “incident” would be forgotten by the time they started up again. But until then, they all just had to grit their teeth and endure the mockery.

Some, like Hawk, walked the halls with a scowl on their faces, looking for people to just look at them wrong so they could pick a fight and re-establish their badassery. Some others stopped wearing their Cobra Kai shirts, too ashamed to advertise their affiliation. And others, like Miguel, tried to pretend that nothing was wrong in the first place.

None of that had anything to do with Robby though. Hardly anybody was even aware of his connection to Miguel and Cobra Kai, apart from him being their occasional victim. That was one of the perks of Miguel more or less ignoring him when they were at school.

So there was nothing odd about him walking over to Sam one day to congratulate her on her victory.

“Thanks.” She said, shyly. “And I’m sorry, but do I know you?”

Robby was taken aback for a moment. He hadn’t expected to be on her radar, but he also hadn’t expected her to acknowledge it.

“I mean, I’ve seen you around, but I don’t think we’ve ever talked before. Have we?” She asked, looking genuinely sorry about it.

“We haven’t.” Robby agreed. “I just thought I should congratulate you.”

She beamed at him. “Most boys think it’s weird for a girl to take part in boy-sports.”

Robby laughed. “Yeah, I used to think like that too.” He told her. “But then a girl kicked my ass at skateboarding and taught me a thing or two.”

Sam giggled. _She really is nice,_ Robby thought. Not at all what he’d expected Daniel “The Devil” LaRusso’s daughter to be.

“I’m Robby, by the way.” He said. “Robby Keene.”

“Samantha LaRusso.” She replied and then flushed. “But I guess you already knew that.”

“So, Samantha LaRusso. What’s next?” He asked. “You set the bar pretty high already. Where do you go from here?”

“Early retirement.” Sam grinned mischievously. “That’s what my… grandfather used to say. My dad has been training me for years and I wanted to try it atleast once, but now, I think I’m gonna retire on top.”

“So you get to stay undefeated forever?” Robby said, smiling in wonder.

That was better than amazing. Not only had she beaten Cobra Kai, she wasn’t even going to give them a chance to redeem themselves – to reclaim their honor. For a moment, Robby had the fantasy of them being friends. Or maybe more. That would royally piss Johnny off, Robby knew. And Miguel would die of jealousy if Robby managed to win over one of the most popular girls in their class.

But it was never going to happen. Sam was a nice girl and the moment she found out who his father was, she’d hate him right away. It wouldn’t matter that he hated Johnny too.

* * *

And then there was the thing with Miguel. That wasn’t going anywhere either. Especially not now.

Robby really should’ve expected this. Miguel tried to act casual, but nobody felt the loss more keenly than him. He’d been looking forward to this for years, looking forward to making Johnny proud. But after losing not only to a girl, but to a LaRusso at that… no way he was just going to be okay with that. He needed to feel validated. He needed to feel like a man again.

And Robby was his ticket to that.

“I saw you today. Talking to _her._ ” Miguel whispered to him that night, kissing him desperately. “Do you have a crush on her now?”

“Everybody loves a winner.” Robby replied snidely.

He felt Miguel’s hand on his crotch, painfully twisting his dick through his boxers.

“Why are you being such an asshole to me?” Miguel said plaintively. “Did I do something wrong?”

_You are doing it right now. Just because I like you like that doesn’t mean you get to use me any time you want. But if you understood that, you wouldn’t be doing this in the first place._

“Maybe I just don’t like you.” Robby said. “Have you ever thought of that?”

“You are lying. You are just trying to hurt me.” Miguel insisted. “You wouldn’t be this good to me if you didn’t like me.”

 _Good to you? How? By spreading my ass for you?_ Did Miguel really not understand that he had no choice here?

Miguel’s fingers slipped inside from the back and found him, slick and loose already. He’d known something was going to happen tonight and he’d prepared himself in advance. He fingered Robby anyway, making him keen and whine and arch up against his stomach.

They’d gotten good at this by now. With that much practice, they knew each-other’s bodies intimately and could easily do this in the dark Afterwards, it didn’t matter who put on whose clothes or if they went to sleep naked, sweaty limbs wrapped around each-other. Miguel always made sure to put an early morning alarm so they could get up, get dressed and go to their respective beds before falling asleep again.

But tonight, Miguel was too desperate to even strip them completely. It was like he couldn’t even take his mouth off Robby for even one moment. He rucked his shirt up under his pits as he worried his nipples with his teeth. Robby cried out softly and grabbed his head, pushing his chest deeper into his face.

He hated Miguel for doing this to him, for making him forget the difference between pain and pleasure. For turning him into a desperate, needy mess who wrapped his legs around Miguel’s waist, trying to pull him in closer.

Miguel barely pushed his own boxers down his legs before cock was at Robby’s hole, demanding entry. Robby relaxed and Miguel pushed in, inch by painful inch as Robby moaned at his pucker stretching around the invasion.

It wasn’t painful like the first time anymore. Miguel had gotten better at prepping him and Robby had gotten better at taking it. He even felt a little proud of it now – of his ability to take whatever Miguel could dish out. He didn’t have to, most of the time. After getting over the desperation of the first time, Miguel had learned to be gentler, to take his time slowly opening him up until Robby couldn’t keep in his needy mewls anymore and practically pushed his ass in Miguel’s face, begging to be fucked.

But tonight was going to hurt – bad enough that he’d feel it the next day. They both wanted it that way. He pulled Miguel up, catching his lips in a kiss before biting down. Miguel retaliated by digging his fingers into Robby side painfully until he let go. He started thrusting into Robby, jabbing his sweet-spot with his blunt head every time. Robby groaned harder and arched up, rubbing his own cock against Miguel’s six-pack.

They went to sleep like that that night – half-undressed and slick with cum with Miguel still buried deep inside him as he played with Robby’s soft cock.

“I think I wanna try skateboarding.” Miguel whispered to him, half-asleep.

Ofcourse he did. This was always going to happen, right? In the end, Miguel couldn’t let him have one thing to himself. 

No doubt he’d end up great at it. Miguel was great at everything. He’d surpass him in no time and it’d be just another thing Robby would end up losing to him.

“You’ll break your boney ass.” Robby whispered back. But Miguel was already asleep.


	15. Robby IX

Miguel had his first and only skate-boarding session two days after his birthday.

He went to the skatepark with Robby that day, all decked out in his protective gear – helmet and mouthguard and semi-armored vest with elbow and knee pads. Robby rolled his eyes at that. He’d looked ridiculous – like he was armoring up to go to war – and he was completely sacrificing any flexibility he could’ve hoped to have. But Carmen had insisted on it and simply crushed all his objections.

“Robby doesn’t wear that stuff.” Miguel had argued.

“Robby is already good at it. You are not.” Carmen had replied.

Robby himself had said nothing because it’d been too damn funny watching Miguel put all of that on. Miguel would discover how unnecessary it all was in one day – elbow and knee pads had always been good enough for Robby and for most of the others there. Hardly anyone even wore a helmet any more because it screwed with their peripheral vision.

He’d given Miguel his wave-board for the birthday that year. Robby didn’t have any money to spare to spend on him and he never used that thing anyway. He’d tried it a couple of times and he’d gotten used to it almost right away, but the bigger stunts were still easier with his regular skateboard. He did feel pretty cheap re-gifting what Johnny had given him last year, but the thing had just been collecting dust under his bed all this time. Better that someone got some use out of it, right?

Robby didn’t want any of this – he didn’t want Miguel to have both karate and skateboarding – but it wasn’t like he could stop it. And maybe starting this off on the right foot would be good for both of them.

Or even all three of them.

Johnny insisted on coming to the park with them that day.

“We said we would do this sometime, remember?” He gushed. “The first time the three of us spent the day together? Well, it took us five years but here we are.”

Robby rolled his eyes but didn’t say anything. That wasn’t one of his fondest memories – the day his father had ignored him as he’d broken his arm and walked around in pain all day. But he didn’t expect Johnny to remember or care and he was so over trying to impress the guy anymore.

And if Miguel wanted to humiliate himself further, that was his business. He was already going to get plenty of funny looks all armored up out like that. He looked like a child afraid of scraping his knee. And if he wanted to embarrass himself further by having his daddy around…

They did get quite a few weird looks and sniggers on their way in. Robby tried to give them some space and tried to pretend that he wasn’t with them, but ofcourse Miguel wouldn’t let him. He kept blabbering about how he’d done all the research about feet-positioning and balance and all the stunts he’d be doing in no time at all.

“Did you learn karate from the internet too or did you learn by actually doing it?” Robby scoffed and that shut him right up.

He wasn’t bad at it for a first-timer. Robby could definitely see some potential there. But he had a hard time finding his balance and forgetting the instincts Johnny had pounded into him.

“It’s nothing like karate.” Miguel said after stumbling off the board and barely avoiding falling for the tenth time. “I keep trying to plant my feet and that keeps making it slip out from under me. And I’ve no idea what I’m supposed to do with my arms.”

“Use them to balance yourself.” Robby suggested. That was just instinct, right?

Miguel nodded and tried again. And this time he fell on his ass not ten seconds later. He jumped back up, dusting himself off in embarrassment and someone laughed at a distance.

“Ignore them.” Johnny said from the bench, still beaming with pride. “Just focus on what you are doing. You are doing great.”

At one time, this would’ve sent Robby seething with jealousy. Johnny had never even given him a single word of praise for his skateboarding. Not even today, as he lazily skated circles around them. But Robby was over that now. Now, he barely even felt a prick.

* * *

“Hey Keene!” A voice called out. “Get your ass over here. We’re doing a wipeout.”

Robby tingled with excitement at the words. He turned to see Tam and Tilly and their friends at a distance, already talking terms. They hadn’t done a proper wipeout race in ages and there were seven of them there already. And Robby made the eight.

But he hesitated. This was Miguel’s day of pratfalls and Robby didn’t want to embarrass himself in front of Johnny again. Nobody had ever finished a wipeout race for real – not even Tilly. And that comment from Johnny all those years ago about not being good at skateboarding had really stung. He may not be hungry for his approval anymore but that didn’t mean he wanted to give him any more grounds for criticism.

“Robby, c’mon!” Tam yelled again. “Tilly needs the practice.”

Robby looked at Johnny uncertainly and found him staring wide-eyed at the group. Specifically at Tilly. He seemed to be breathing harder now.

 _Figures._ Robby thought. _He probably doesn’t think that girls should skateboard either._

Tam was shouting at a couple of twelve-year olds in the pit, yelling at them to get clear or reap the pain. Robby weighed the pros and cons here. Johnny certainly wouldn’t want to see both of his sons lose to girls and while he had been supportive of Miguel, he definitely wouldn’t be as kind to Robby.

“Robby, you coming?” It was Tilly who called out this time.

“Maybe next time.” Robby yelled back. Two minutes of adrenaline rush was probably not worth what would follow.

“What? You pussy now?” Tilly shouted.

That got him. He could never turn down a challenge like that. And what did he care about Johnny’s opinion anyway?

“What’s going on?” Miguel asked, watching the events unfold curiously.

“What’s going on is I’m about to teach those punks a lesson.” Robby said cockily and loudly enough for his voice to reach them. “Excuse me. This won’t take long.”

He ignored Johnny’s and Miguel’s eyes on him as he confidently skated over. That had been his mistake the last time. He had been too focused on having his dad pay attention to him and that had thrown him off his game. But not this time. This time, he was going to ignore their existence and focus solely on the task at hand.

They discussed the route for a bit and all the tricks and stunts Tilly would need to focus on for her big upcoming tryout. It wasn’t enough to know the stunts – she had to do them faster, better and under any condition. They mapped the route and all the tricks they’d have to go through to win and Robby did a mental walk-through of the race.

It was going to be impossible. Skating down the pit at full speed, gathering enough speed to jump out at the other end. Then going through the obstacles, going over and under and around as needed. Then making your way to the deeper pit, grinding down atleast twenty-five stairs worth of handrail. And if you somehow managed to stay on your feet after all _that,_ you still had to skate your way out and make your way back through the obstacle course again.

At full speed, the course wouldn’t take more than three minutes, Robby expected. But most of them wouldn’t last two. The stunts weren’t impossible on their own. Robby had done them individually plenty of times. But stringing them together while going that fast? That was going to be a disaster.

And it was going to look epic.

Robby forgot all about Johnny and Miguel as the eight of them took positions. Tilly was near the center – the most dangerous place to be. Someone always crashed with someone else in the very beginning in their eagerness to take the lead. And the closer you were to the center, the higher the chance of that. Robby himself was in a much safer position at one end and that suited his strategy just fine. Trying to take the lead was a fool’s game. Much better to let others go ahead and show you the safe path forward. All you had to focus on was avoiding their tumbling bodies. Go fast, but not so fast that you lost control. Keep up the pace, but don’t try to overtake anyone. And if you made it to the last leg somehow, then give it your all and push forward with all your might. That was good enough for him. Unlike Tilly, he didn’t need to up his game.

They all leaned forward in the line, waiting for one of the kids to start the timer and give them the signal. Robby could feel his heart pounding and his blood rushing in his ears. It was making him hyper-focused and hyper-aware of everything around him. The kid yelled “Go!” and they all shot off like bullets from a gun.

Tam went down first, crashing into another guy no sooner than they had gotten down in the pit. Tilly gracefully skated around their tumbling bodies and sped ahead. She predictably took the lead, whizzing forward crouched low on her board with others hot on her heels. Robby let others speed ahead, but apparently, another guy had the same idea as him. He stayed behind Robby despite being given a wide berth for overtaking.

Five out of the remaining six made it out of the pit. One guy hesitated a little on the upswing and ended up losing speed. His wheel caught the edge and he tripped and fell as others flew past him. Robby himself went a little too fast and flew high in the air, fearing for a moment that he was done for. But he somehow stuck the landing and sped ahead towards the obstacle course.

There was no pausing or assessing in a race. You had to do that as you went along at breakneck pace. And they ended up losing the other three guys through the obstacles. The guy behind Robby tried to go under when he should’ve gone over and got clotheslined by the railing. The guy behind Tilly went a little too fast in his attempt to overtake her and landed on the second obstacle as he jumped over the first. And the third guy mistimed his final jump and tripped over the rail instead.

Tilly kept moving through it all, fast but steady, never looking back and never missing a single trick. Robby matched her speed and aped her moves, keeping them ten feet apart, ducking and jumping and making it through as well.

 _I can do this,_ Robby thought. _I may not win, but I can finish it this time._

The landing after the grind was going to be the hardest. After sliding down the railing, he’d end up going too fast and he was almost certain to wipeout as he touched the ground. Tilly was already on there, sliding down, trying to control her speed and if Robby managed to stick the landing somehow, the rest would be much easier.

His wheel landed wrong on the railing and he felt his board shoot out from under him.

 _Shit._ That was the only thing he could think of as the metal rail painfully caught his shin on the way down. He had too much momentum, too much speed to avoid tumbling down the stairs but he also had too much practice falling down. He made himself go limp, resisting the instinct to try and break his fall with his hands.

It didn’t protect him completely, though. He hit the stairs shoulder first, slamming his head into the concrete before rolling and bouncing down. His jaw caught the edge of the stairs, he slid down part of it and then rolled again until he was finally at the bottom on his back. He laid there, staring at the sky, trying to breathe through the pain and praying he hadn’t broken anything. He hadn’t wiped out like that in ages.

“You did that on purpose, didn’t you? Asshole!” He heard Tilly say and turned his head to look at her.

She was sitting a few feet away, holding his skateboard and rubbing her leg. Her own was still rolling along the pit.

“What?” He asked, nonplussed.

“Your board caught the back of my leg.” She said, grinning. “I almost had the landing this time. I was going to make it. But you had to ruin it.”

Robby grinned back at her. “Does this mean I win?”

“Dream on.” Tilly scoffed. “You still wiped out before me.”

Robby looked back up at the sky, smiling despite the pain. He hoped someone got it all on the camera. They’d be replaying this one for ages.

“ROBBY!” He heard Johnny yell and saw him at the edge of the pit.

Johnny jumped in, sliding down the last few feet and almost falling over before running towards him. He practically slid along the concrete in his hurry to kneel by his side.

“You alright?” He asked, touching his face and patting his chest. “Anything broken?”

“I’m fine.” Robby frowned back.

The pain flaring through his whole body was receding now, getting concentrated on the areas where he was actually hurt and allowing him to assess the damage. His shin still throbbed, as did his shoulder from having landed on it. He’d scraped his forearm on his way down and his knew he’d have a bump on his head and a bruise on his jaw tomorrow. But all in all, he’d gotten off easy. No broken ribs or arms or legs and no bleeding anywhere.

“Don’t try to get up.” Johnny said still panicking. “Miguel, call 911.”

“What? No!” Robby said, surprised.

He pushed Johnny’s arm away and got up despite his attempts to keep him down. Miguel was right behind Johnny, looking scared and others were gathering as well. The guys who’d fallen before and the kids who were keeping time and recording the whole thing. They were still recording, he realized and flushed in embarrassment as Johnny kept trying to touch him.

“I’m fine.” He insisted, limping over to Tilly to get his skateboard. Why did Johnny have to do this? Why did he need to embarrass Robby like that?

“We are going to the hospital.” Johnny said, flatly. “We are getting you checked out right away.”

 _What the hell?_ Why was Johnny treating him like a child in front of all these people? He didn’t make Miguel run to the hospital every time he tripped and fell, did he?

“I said I’m fine.” Robby said. “In fact, I can go again. Ready for round two, T.?”

Tilly looked at him and then at Johnny, who was glaring at her threateningly. She wanted to – Robby could see that. Epic wipeouts like that really got their blood flowing and she’d been smiling and laughing just moments ago. She had been seconds away from challenging him to a rematch.

“It was a pretty big fall.” She said, uncertainly. “Maybe you should do what your dad tells you.”

* * *

Johnny’s hands shook as he filled the forms. The doctor had given Robby a once over and claimed that there was nothing to worry about, but Johnny wasn’t going to trust that. Doctors missed things and he hadn’t seen the fall. So Johnny insisted on X-rays and told them to rule out a concussion.

Robby had grumbled all the way through it. In fact, he’d started grumbling at the skate-park and hadn’t stopped since. He had insisted that he was fine all the way through the car ride to the hospital after Johnny had sent Miguel home and Johnny had told him he didn’t care. Robby was getting checked out and that was that. He should’ve just been thankful that Johnny hadn’t called the paramedics.

Johnny couldn’t believe that he’d been so stupid. Five years since that incident and it was like he hadn’t learned a single damned thing.

He had felt the fear the moment Miguel had told him that he wanted to learn skateboarding. The vision of Robby’s arm, all purple and swollen floating before his eyes. But that was stupid, he’d told himself. Robby had been skating for years without an incident and Miguel had ended up with more than a few bumps in his karate training.

Boys liked sports and they got a little bruised sometimes. It wasn’t a big deal. And if Robby wasn’t going to join Cobra Kai, then Miguel could try skateboarding. It’d bring them closer together, especially after the distance he’d sensed between them lately. And he’d been so desperate for them to get along – so eager to watch them get along.

And it wasn’t like he was a stranger to skateboarding. He’d tried it himself as a young boy, before getting into karate. He’d never gotten the hang of it himself, but he’d seen plenty of guys do their tricks.

Nor was he some kind of overprotective helicopter parent. Sure, he found himself getting nervous watching Miguel in class – or in the tournament – but he knew the kid was safe. Maybe he’d end up with a few bruises but nothing he wouldn’t get over in a few days.

And the same applied to Robby and skateboarding.

He’d been determined to make this day a good one. He was going to encourage Miguel to learn from Robby for a change. He had no doubt that Robby would try to impress him, try to show off the skills he must had developed over the years. He was going to tell Robby how awesome he was and how he could help Miguel get better. He was saving that for something good. For something… like the race.

He’d been so proud of his son in that moment – when Robby had risen to the challenge and gone over. He had tried to catch Robby’s eye before the race, to give him a thumbs-up and a best-of-luck, but Robby had been too focused on the task. As he should’ve been. It didn’t matter. There was always after.

The race itself though – that had really opened Johnny’s eyes. It was all that girl’s fault – that Tilly’s. First she used his son for her pleasure and now she was using him to show off again. Johnny didn’t care if she went ahead and broke her own neck, but she had no right to make Robby do something dangerous like that.

This was nothing like karate. Johnny had realized that the moment he saw those two guys crash into each-other. Sure, karate involved a lot of punching and kicking, but Johnny had done his best to make sure those kids would be safe. All these years and he hadn’t had a single broken finger in his dojo. Meanwhile, his actual son was doing something this dangerous – something that could get him seriously hurt or killed and he had been completely oblivious.

No – that wasn’t true. He should’ve known about the danger from the start. Ever since Robby broke his arm. But he’d looked away – blinded himself to the truth.

But he couldn’t look away today. Couldn’t stop his breath from catching as he had seen Robby speed down the pit.

_Too fast. You are going too fast. And you are gonna hit the wall at full speed._

He’d felt his heart leap through his chest as Robby had leapt into the air.

_Too high. A fall from that height can break your back._

But then Robby had twisted his body mid-air in this amazing move and Johnny’s eyes had practically bugged out.

“Holy shit!” He’d heard Miguel whisper and he couldn’t disagree with the sentiment. All that looked way more badass than anything he’d seen in his dojo. And when Robby had gracefully weaved his way through the obstacles, Johnny had almost felt foolish for worrying. This is what he should be teaching his students, he’d thought. Not the lame punching through boards.

But then, he’d seen the fall and his blood had frozen in his veins. It didn’t matter how good you were, he realized – all it took was one mistake, one misstep, one mistimed move and _that_ happened. He had done nothing but stare in horror as he saw his son tumble down those stairs. And for one nightmarish moment as Robby lay there unmoving, Johnny had been sure that he was dead. But he had seen him turn his head then and the relief had spurred him into action.

He couldn’t let this happen again. Today had been a miracle. It’d looked like Robby got hit by a truck, but somehow managed to escape without a single broken bone. But he might not be so lucky the next time.

So there wasn’t going to _be_ a next time.

* * *

Robby couldn’t believe his ears. He glared at Johnny, open-mouthed, trying to think of something to say.

“You are not serious.” He said, finally.

“Like a heart-attack. Like the one you almost gave me today.” Johnny replied. “You are not gonna skateboard anymore. Neither of you.”

He couldn’t do that. He wouldn’t.

“Yeah, well, try and stop me.” Robby said sneering.

“I already locked away your skateboard. And the waveboard.” Johnny said nodding to Miguel. “And you are not going back to the skate-park. Miguel’s gonna make sure of that.”

Robby felt like a cornered animal, scared at watching all his escapes getting blocked off one by one. Even if he bought another skateboard, Miguel still could make sure he never got to use it.

“You had no right.” Robby whispered. “Mom gave me that skateboard.”

“I don’t care.” Johnny replied.

“Johnny, can we talk about this?” Carmen asked, looking between them and concerned. “You know Robby loves to skate.”

Robby wouldn’t have looked to her for support but he was glad to have it anyway.

“It’s too dangerous.” Johnny said, shaking his head.

She’d said the same thing not two days ago – when she’d insisted on Miguel taking every precaution.

“Well, we can get Robby the gear too.” She suggested. “We should’ve done that ages ago.”

Robby cringed at the thought of putting it on – but if it meant he could keep doing what he loved, he was willing to put up with the embarrassment. But Miguel turned on him too.

“You didn’t see it, mom.” He said. “It really freaked me out too. Here, let me show you.”

He took out is phone, thumbing at the screen and Robby’s blood went cold. The video had made its way to the internet hours ago and as impressed Robby had been with himself for walking away from _that_ practically unscathed, he know it didn’t look good.

He saw Carmen gasp as she watched it on Miguel’s phone and he knew he’d lost her as well.

“That’s you?” She asked, staring at Robby. “That happened?”

Robby didn’t answer her – turning on Johnny instead.

“You can’t do this.” He yelled. “I love skateboarding.”

“I know.” Johnny looked guilty, but determined. “I also know you could’ve really gotten hurt today. I don’t care if you hate me for this – my priority is to keep you from getting hurt.”

_Since when?_

Robby had gotten hurt practically every day since he had come to live with them. A few scrapes and bruises from skating were nothing compared to what Miguel and Hawk and others from Cobra Kai had put him through. And Johnny had always turned a blind eye towards it all.

Skating was his one escape. The one good thing he had left in his life and now Johnny was taking that away too with some bullshit excuse.

“I’ve been doing this for years.” Robby told him. “That wipe-out today – it wasn’t even the worst one I’ve ever had.”

“And that’s supposed to change my mind?” Johnny asked disbelieving.

“I don’t know why I need to.” Robby replied. “I’ve been falling off my skateboard for years. So why do you care about that all of a sudden?”

Johnny swallowed guiltily. “Today was different.”

 _No, it wasn’t_. There had been nothing different about today – except for Miguel being there. So was that it? Robby wondered.

Yes, skateboarding could be dangerous. Yes, you could have a really bad fall and break an arm or a leg. But none of that was news. Johnny had known all this for years. Hell, Robby had broken his arm skateboarding right in front of him and Johnny hadn’t even cared enough to take it seriously. So the only reason he was suddenly so obsessed with the dangers of skateboarding would be because of Miguel.

Miguel wanted to learn, but Johnny saw the risk and didn’t want to put him through that. But ofcourse, he couldn’t stop Miguel from learning if he let Robby do it – so once again, Robby was getting screwed over for Miguel’s sake. Because he couldn’t allow Miguel to get hurt, now Robby had to sacrifice something he loved.

It wasn’t enough that Johnny didn’t give a shit about him – now he was going out of his way to make his life miserable. All the while hiding behind the façade of a caring father.

Robby cursed in frustration and stormed inside, slamming his door shut. He was done with this now, done with being treated like shit, done with all the abuse. He couldn’t stop them from doing what they wanted to him – he was powerless as far as that was concerned. But he had other ways of fighting back. He’d show them that he could hurt them too.

And he knew exactly where to start.


	16. Miguel VII

The Year of Misery.

That was going to be the title of this particular chapter of Miguel’s life. The one covering the fifteenth year of his life.

Sure he was expecting Robby to fight back. He could only shudder at the thought of being told to give up karate. Robby loved skateboarding and he was fucking great at it. The way he had moved that day…

But Miguel understood where Johnny was coming from as well. It’d felt like his own heart had stopped when he saw Robby fall. It was almost a miracle that he made it out of that unhurt. And he found himself agreeing 100% with Johnny and his commandment.

Yeah, maybe they were being a little hypocritical. They always talked about being badass, didn’t they? That’s what being a Cobra meant – being daring, taking risks, not being afraid of getting hurt. And what Robby had done – competing with guys older than him in a test of speed, agility and focus and almost winning – they should’ve been all over him after that display. Clapping him on the back and praising him and forcing random strangers to see the video of how awesome he was.

And yet, the fall had taken it all away and all they were left with was fear.

Miguel didn’t expect Robby to just accept it. Especially when he started sneaking off after school. He was sure Robby had found some way around it – buying a skateboard and stashing it somewhere and sneaking off to practice. Robby had frustrated all his attempts to follow him – but there were only some selected places he could be, right? Miguel had found out all the skate-parks in the vicinity and gone to them looking for him, but Robby hadn’t been there.

“So where were you all afternoon?” Johnny asked him when Miguel told him about it.

“I got a job.” Robby replied. “Working with cars.”

“Really?” Johnny was skeptical.

“Yes! Really!” Robby said, showing off his grease-stained hands.

“So can we see this place where you work?” Johnny asked, probing deeper.

“No! You can’t.” Robby refused.

“If you are really working there - ”

“You ruin everything, okay?” Robby yelled. “Every time you see me do something I like, you put a stop to it. I like this and you are NOT messing it up for me.”

It did _seem_ that way, didn’t it? Not being allowed to date or skate – Miguel could see why Robby would feel that way. It’d be different if Robby was interested in things Johnny approved of – like karate. But Miguel understood where Johnny was coming from and he tried to explain it to Robby too.

“He’s just scared because he cares.” He told him that night.

“Bullshit.” Robby replied. “I’ve been doing this for years and he never gave a shit. And now he cares all of a sudden?”

 _Just give it time,_ Miguel told himself. _He is angry now and he has every right to be. But he’ll get over it and he’ll see it too._

If it had been anybody else, Miguel would’ve just called him an ungrateful bastard and kicked his ass. In fact, he’d have done it to Robby not two years ago. But things were different now. He knew Robby a lot better and cared about him a lot more.

And Robby really was a sweetheart. When he wasn’t deliberately being an ass, that was.

It was subtle and it took Miguel a long time to actually notice. Even now, he only saw those things in retrospect. Little things that meant nothing in the grand scheme of things, but still kept adding up one by one.

The first time he’d noticed was when he had fallen asleep one afternoon drooling over the book under him. Not completely asleep – he had been somewhere between waking and dreaming, wanting to get up but feeling too lazy to do it, when he’d felt someone take the book from under him and pull the covers over. He hadn’t thought anything of it until he’d woken up and found the book bookmarked to the page he’d been on.

“What?” Robby had snapped as Miguel stared at him.

“Nothing.” Miguel had stammered, unsure of what he was feeling. “Just… nothing.”

You didn’t actually do shit like that for people unless you loved them, right?

The skateboarding thing had been another one. He hadn’t actually been serious about taking it up. It’d just been a stupid fantasy, murmured into Robby’s ear when he’d been half-asleep. But Robby had remembered and given him the wave-board. That had ended badly and Robby was just as pissed at Miguel – but that didn’t take anything away from the gesture.

Robby made his life more comfortable in a thousand small ways – cleaning up their room without even being asked, taking on his chores, never interrupting his time with Johnny, putting up with his friends when he wasn’t around even though he didn’t like them. Miguel never had to ask him to do any of it – he was just there, doing it all unnoticed.

“Did you like Tory?” Miguel asked him once.

“No.” Robby replied immediately.

“Were you jealous of her?” Miguel sat up.

“Why would I be jealous of her?” Robby said, indignantly. “I didn’t like her because she just walked in and kinda took over everything. That’s not jealousy.”

 _It kinda is though,_ Miguel thought.

“But I was spending less time with you when I was dating her.” Miguel said. “Were you okay with that?”

“You can spend time with whoever you want.” Robby replied, sullenly. “I don’t care.”

He did care though. He always acted like he didn’t, but every now and then, Miguel caught that shy half-smile on his face that disappeared as soon as their eyes met. And it wasn’t just physical – it wasn’t just about sex. They’d just be hanging out on the couch, watching TV and Miguel would feel Robby slide closer until he wrapped his arm around his shoulders and pulled him in.

He pulled him in now too – wrapped his arms around his waist, nuzzled his neck before pulling down his jeans and boxers and wrapping his hand around his hardening cock.

“You don’t care about spending time with me?” Miguel whispered, teasing. “That hurts my feelings.”

“Fuck you. I don’t care.” Robby said, trying to push himself deeper into Miguel’s chest and baring his neck to him. Miguel jerked him off, made him writhe and moan in his arms until Robby was spilling in his hand.

“I still don’t like your friends.” Robby whispered, leaning back against him. “And I’m not gonna hang out with them just to spend more time with you.”

Miguel didn’t say anything. Robby often ended up hanging out with them anyway – or atleast around them – even though he didn’t like them, just to be around Miguel. And that was sweet in its own way.

He brought up his spunk-covered hand to Robby’s mouth and Robby licked it clean.

And it wasn’t just with him. Robby was like that with others too.

Like his mom had this long-standing tradition of taking out a recipe during lunch and sticking it on the fridge – just as an FYI of what they were having for dinner that night. She often had to work late and yaya had friends of her own – so whichever one got home first could start on dinner. Miguel never paid much attention to it beyond looking at it to see what was for dinner that night.

But Robby started helping out by preparing everything before they got back. Cutting the vegetables, defrosting the meat, getting the pots and pans out. Nobody even knew he was doing it – Carmen thought it was Rosa and Rosa thought it was Carmen.

“Did these go bad?” Johnny asked, tentatively sniffing the onion slices.

“Don’t blame me.” Carmen said, “Mom already had them cut up when I got home.”

“ _Que?_ ” Rosa said. “No! Not me.”

The looked at each-other in confusion until Robby spoke up.

“Sorry. Didn’t know they’d gone bad.” He said, shrugging.

Carmen got this weird look on her face.

“Have you been doing this?” She asked. “Preparing for dinner before I got home.”

Robby looked at them like he was trapped.

“I got bored, okay. There was nothing to do.” He said defensively. “I won’t do it again.”

“That’s not what I meant.” Carmen said quickly. “It was really nice.”

But Robby kept looking at her suspiciously.

“Well, it still ruined dinner.”

It was the same in a lot of other smaller things. Like fixing the creaking door Carmen had been after Johnny to handle. Or changing the light-bulb that had gone out. Or helping them set up the new TV-set.

He always had an excuse – “It just needed some oil”, or “I need the light too” – and he never took credit unless asked. Miguel never really understood that. Not even when Carmen explained it to him.

“It’s how he grew up.” She said sadly. “His mom was never around and he always tried so hard to get her attention, doing stuff to make her want to stay around, that now it has just become a habit for him.”

But that didn’t make sense. He wasn’t just doing it out of habit. It wasn’t unconscious. Robby was deliberately paying attention. Making notes on what they liked and what they didn’t.

Like when he picked up an extra six-pack when shopping for groceries.

“Mom said one was enough.” Miguel told him.

“It’s Superbowl week and dad’s gonna have friends over.” Robby replied. “Trust me, you don’t want them to send you on a beer run in the middle of it.”

They wouldn’t. No one would sell beer to them without an adult around anyway. The excuse was paper-thin – Robby just didn’t want them to run out.

Or like at Johnny’s birthday this year. Miguel was looking online for a fitbit as a gift.

“Think he’d like a regular old watch better.” Robby said, looking over his shoulder. “You know he is terrible with tech, right?”

“He’s getting better.” Miguel said, annoyed. He’d been so proud of his idea this time.

“You are gonna make him feel stupid on his birthday.” Robby said, shrugging.

Miguel considered it and had to admit that Robby had a point. Sure Johnny would appreciate anything he gave him, but maybe it wasn’t the best idea to make him feel inadequate. He didn’t contemplate the deeper meaning behind it until much later.

Robby paid attention. He knew what Johnny liked and didn’t like – how he felt about things. And that meant he cared. Despite all the anger and the yelling, deep down, he cared a lot. About all of them.

And that made it even harder when he used that to lash out at them instead.

“It’s your birthday?” Robby said casually the morning of. “Huh – must have forgotten.”

Bullshit. Robby never forgot stuff like that. Even before he had come to live with them, Johnny always atleast got a text from him. He was just doing this to get back at them for the surprise party disaster.

“That’s okay.” Johnny overlooked the provocation. “Just be home in time for dinner, alright? We won’t start without you.”

 _Stupid. Don’t give him ideas._ Miguel had been so sure that Robby was going to use that. Stay out late and make them go looking for him. But he had come home in time – high as a kite. They could all smell it on him and see it in his unfocused, red eyes. He was goading them into yelling at him, trying to make them ruin the dinner, but thankfully, Johnny didn’t take the bait.

“You could’ve gotten him a gift atleast.” Miguel said to him that night.

“I don’t have the money to spare.” Robby replied, not looking at him.

More bullshit. Robby got the same allowance as him, on top of what he was making from that new job of his. And he never actually spent it. He never bought anything for himself – even his clothes he let fall apart before Carmen insisted on buying him new ones. And it wasn’t like he had a girlfriend he was spending it all on. The whole “poor kid” routine was getting a bit tiring.

“What about all the dough from your job?” Miguel scoffed. “Where are you blowing that?”

“I’m saving it.”

“What? In a piggy bank under your bed?” Miguel smirked.

“No. In a savings account.” Robby turned to look at him.

Miguel was taken aback for a moment. That was…quite responsible, actually. Kind of a smart, mature thinking he hadn’t expected from anyone his age. But that was the point, right? They were still kids. They weren’t supposed to worry about saving money and shit like that. That’s what their parents were there for.

“What for?” Miguel asked.

“So I can move out of here as soon as possible.” Robby stated in a matter-of-fact manner. As if that was something everybody knew already.

Miguel felt cold all over at those words. Robby wanted to move out? To leave them? Why?

“What do you mean why?” Robby frowned at him. “I told you already that I didn’t wanna be here and you told me that nobody wanted me here anyway.”

No – that was… sure he’d said those words, but he hadn’t meant them. And that was such a long time ago – back when he hadn’t really known Robby. Everything was different now, wasn’t it?

“Like what?” Robby scoffed. “Nothing has changed.”

Things had changed though. Things like… okay, Miguel couldn’t really put his finger on anything specific. But that wasn’t his fault – that was Robby’s. He was the one who never made an effort, never reached out to them and rejected all their attempts to reach out.

They’d tried so hard to make him feel at home – to make him feel welcome. From Miguel sharing his room to Johnny asking him to join Cobra Kai. Sure, things hadn’t always worked out due to miscommunications and misunderstanding. Like the camping trip or the birthday party or skateboarding. But it was the thought that mattered, right? Couldn’t Robby see that?

Clearly he didn’t. Maybe part of him was a selfish asshole after all. The part that needed everything to be his way or the highway.

Miguel wasn’t equipped to handle this. And Johnny was the only one who could fix this. So he told him the next day and prayed that he was making the right choice.

“You want to move out?” Johnny asked Robby. “Like not live with us anymore?”

“You are surprised?” Robby replied. “You told me it was only going to be a few weeks until mom got better and it has been over two years.”

“It’s not my fault Shannon can’t stay clean for more than a few months.” Johnny snapped.

“Maybe she would if you let me live with her.” Robby snapped back.

Johnny didn’t take the bait, thankfully. No good would’ve come from a fight here.

“It’s because I made him quit skateboarding.” Miguel heard him tell mom. “He’s trying to punish me, but he’ll get over it.”

That made Miguel feel a little better. Johnny was right – Robby didn’t actually mean it. It was just a juvenile cry for attention. Like a five-year old running away from home because mommy wouldn’t let him have candy. The more attention they gave him, the longer it’d take for him to learn his lesson and get over himself.

So the best way to deal with this was to act like nothing had changed and treat him the same as usual.

* * *

So Miguel followed Johnny’s example and went back to ignoring Robby when he acted like a little bitch. And he made it pretty easy too. He headed off to work right after school and didn’t come back until late in the evening. Then he did his homework and ate dinner in silence before heading off to bed. He even went to work most weekends.

Miguel tried icing him out, he tried not talking to him and waited for him to come begging back – but Robby proved more stubborn than him. In the end, Miguel broke first, crawling into his bed and pushing his hand between his legs.

The next few months were weird. It was like Robby was a stranger living among them even though he never said or did anything different. Miguel could feel him pulling away and he became desperate to hold on. And got angrier when he couldn’t.

Maybe he could’ve handled it if it’d just been him – but the way Robby acted around Johnny, the way he kept rejecting him was something he could not bear to watch.

“Wanna come camping this weekend?” Johnny asked and Miguel saw Robby’s eyes brighten for a fraction of a second.

“To the Cobra Kai annual?” Robby scoffed. “Pass.”

That was a tradition Johnny had started years ago – taking some of the best students of his dojo on a camping trip. As a way to reward them for their hard work and a way to inspire others. It was an honor and even Miguel had to earn it. He hadn’t gone the first couple of times despite having been there from the start.

And Robby was getting an invite without doing anything to earn it. Didn’t he get what an honor this was?

“It’ll be fun.” Johnny tried. “You could help me referee the games.”

“I never have any fun around those Cobra Kai assholes.” Robby replied. “Would you get that already?”

Miguel saw the crestfallen look on Johnny’s face and could barely contain his rage. He hurt Robby that night. More than he’d meant to.

“You think you won’t miss this when you are alone?” He asked, painfully twisting his fingers inside the boy and scratching at his prostrate. Robby whined at the stimulation but didn’t give in.

“Don’t think you are the only one who can do that.” He panted.

Miguel growled in frustration and roughly pulled out, making Robby keen at the emptiness. He spread his legs apart and forced his way inside, not waiting for Robby to adjust to his girth before he started slamming in.

“Is that your plan? To become a hustler?” He asked as Robby started sobbing. “You wanna be a whore? Spread your legs for strangers for a dollar? That’s how you gonna support yourself?”

Robby didn’t say anything. He let out soft, pained gasps but arched his hips up anyway, wrapping him legs around Miguel’s waist and pulling him in deeper. His fingers scratched at Miguel’s back, desperately trying to hold on.

“Answer me!” Miguel said, squeezing his cock painfully. “You want to be a slut?”

“I already am.” Robby cried, spilling all over Miguel’s hands. He broke down, sobbing softly as Miguel emptied inside of him.

Those words haunted him afterwards. _I already am?_ Did Robby really think of himself as a slut? And did Miguel make him think that way?

“Everybody likes sex, okay?” He told Robby the next morning. “That doesn’t make you a slut.”

“It’s different with the stuff I like and you know it.” Robby replied.

Miguel couldn’t disagree. He had always thought this stuff was stupid, but that was considered common wisdom amongst boys. It was one thing if you got a blowjob, but giving one made you a slut. It was badass to fuck someone in the ass, but taking it made you a bitch. There was nothing wrong with Robby enjoying all that, but people had a way of getting into your head and making you feel that way anyway. He tried to tell Robby as much, but Robby wouldn’t believe him.

“So what? I’m not a freak now?”

 _That was ages ago._ Miguel thought angrily. _You can’t still hold that against me._

But then, the more he thought about it, the more he realized that that hadn’t been the only time. He might not have said it, but he had made Robby feel like a freak more than once. Shamed Robby whenever he couldn’t handle his own emotions.

Like the first time Robby had cum in his hands. Or the time with Hawk.

Like that time they wrestled and Miguel ended up on his chest, pushing his ass in his face. 

“Kiss my ass,” Miguel said, playfully. “And I’ll let you up.”

He felt a peck on his cheek through his shorts almost immediately and shoved his hand down Robby’s to find him thickening up. He decided to take it further then.

“Un-huh. Not good enough.” He said, pulling his shorts down and pushing his bare ass into Robby’s face. “Do it right. Kiss my ass like you mean it.”

Robby licked his lips and kissed both cheeks, all wet and sloppy. Then Miguel felt his nose push into the crack before his tongue swiped over his hole. The sensation made him shiver and push back even more.

Before he knew it, he was riding Robby’s face, all sopping wet from his taint to his hole as Robby’s tongue jabbed against his furled opening. He tormented Robby as he beat off his meat furiously on top of him. He pulled his shirt up and his shorts off before playing with him.

He pinched his sides, making him writhe and squirm under him. He made him jerk by slapping his balls and flicking his dickhead. He circled his bellybutton before pushing his finger deep inside – as far as it’d go – which made Robby arch up and almost throw him off. No matter what he did, he saw Robby get harder and spurt more and more precum – and every time he made him moan, he sensation went right up Miguel’s ass the through his dick, right to the tip. He didn’t let up even as Robby’s hands started to beat uselessly against his thighs and he kept playing with his cock until it was spurting in his hand. Robby kept moving his tongue through the orgasm and Miguel finished off furiously with ropes of cum flying in the air and landing on Robby’s tense abs.

This was called rimming and Miguel had been disgusted by the idea before. He felt like he should’ve still felt disgusted, but he’d enjoyed it too much for that. So instead, he took it out on Robby.

“Dude, putting your mouth on my ass is messed up.” He said, letting him up finally. “Don’t do that again.”

Or more recently when he’d challenged Robby to wear the plug to the school. Robby looked scared, but he was never one to back away from a challenge.

Miguel slowly fingered him open in the morning just before leaving for school before pushing the lubed-up plug in him.

“You can take it out whenever you want.” Miguel said, twisting and adjusting it inside before pulling his briefs up. “Or you can ask me to do that. I wanna see how long you last.”

Robby was going to be hard and leaking all day, so Miguel made him wear his old briefs that were a size too small for him and barely covered his ass. He also stuffed a few tissues in the front to soak up any discharge. He didn’t want to humiliate Robby by making him come in his pants in front of the whole school after all.

More than one teacher asked Robby if he was feeling okay that day. His cheeks were flushed but the rest of him was pale and sweaty. Miguel only shared a couple of classes with him, but he really made them count by starting the plug up and watching him squirm in his seat. Robby looked around scared, worried that people would know, but if anyone noticed the humming, they didn’t bother to investigate the source.

Except for Hawk.

“You got Robby on the other end of that thing?” He whispered to Miguel, pointing at the small round remote in his hand.

How did Hawk know what that was for? For the hundredth time Miguel regretted ever letting him know about this. He barely had time to react before Hawk was snatching it from his hand.

“Give it back!” Miguel hissed, trying to take it.

“Diaz! Eli!” The teacher shouted. “Something wrong?”

“No ma’am!” They both said in unison.

“Then pay attention to the class.”

Miguel saw Robby glaring at them angrily before turning away. And there was nothing he could do to take back the remote without drawing attention.

“Would you relax?” Hawk whispered, turning the intensity up. “I know what I’m doing.”

He didn’t though. He just kept fiddling with it, turning it up and changing the rhythm and that made Robby squirm uncomfortably in his seat. In the end, he couldn’t keep in an uncomfortable groan and that turned a few eyes towards him. Miguel took the chance to snatch the remote back and turned it off immediately, making Robby slump in relief.

As soon as the class was over, Miguel followed Robby out and walked him to the furthest bathroom that was usually empty.

“I’m ending this now.” He said after making sure they were alone in there. “I think you’ve had enough.”

“Done already?” Robby smirked. “I can do this all day.”

“We got gym class later.” Miguel reminded him. He hadn’t considered it possible for Robby to last that long but now he wasn’t sure. “You really want other guys to see you with that thing up your ass?”

Robby shrugged, smirking.

It was the challenge. That’s what this was about.

“Fine, you win.” Miguel said, unzipping him and pushing his pants down. “You can take it out and I’ll get you off - ”

He stopped as his hand reached inside the briefs to find Robby wet and messy.

“I came like three times already.” Robby told him.

“Then why did you keep it inside?” Miguel asked, puzzled.

“That was the challenge, right?”

Miguel shook his head, exasperated, gently tugging the plug out of him. Robby could be so weird sometimes – putting himself through misery just to prove a point.

“You are so messed-up, you know that?”

Miguel flushed hot at the memory now. He was the one who had pushed Robby into all that stuff, goaded him into it. In fact, from the very beginning, Miguel had been the one to take the lead – and then he had turned around and shamed Robby for it. That wasn’t fair and it wasn’t right. No wonder Robby wanted to get away from him.

But he’d make it right. He’d tell Robby that it was alright. More than that, he’d show him. He’d blow him and rim him and even let him fuck Miguel for a change – all just to show that he was just as big a “slut” too.

But the next blow fell before he had the chance.

* * *

“He’s what?” Johnny asked, stunned.

Miguel couldn’t believe his ears either. That had to be a lie.

“I’m sorry Sensei. I thought you knew.” Aisha said, scared.

She was one of the new girls Johnny had allowed in and she had taken to the Cobra Kai way immediately. And it was a good thing too – because she was kind of friends with Samantha LaRusso and LaRusso might’ve snatched her up immediately.

“Nah…” She’d said. “I tried to join Miyagi-Do before but that wasn’t gonna happen. Sam told me that Miyagi-Do only takes on one student at a time and that spot has already been filled the new guy, right?”

That had made them curious. A new challenger? Someone tougher LaRusso was putting up against them next time? Knowing your enemy was half the battle, right? And now Aisha was giving them inside information.

But she’d been surprised when they asked her about this new guy.

“It’s Robby Keene.” She told them. “He didn’t tell you guys? He’s your friend, right?”

_More than that. A lot more. So why would he betray us like that? Why would he betray dad?_

It was just as big a shock to Johnny. Robby did say he was working with cars and LaRusso did own a series of auto-shops – but they’d never thought of putting those two things together. Even if Robby wanted to get back at Johnny for the skateboarding thing, this was going too far. This was the worst possible betrayal.

 _It’s a mistake._ Miguel told himself. It had to be. Aisha misunderstood something or Robby was playing a prank. He did love them, after all. He might concoct a story to get back at them, but he’d never do something like this for real.

But it wasn’t. Robby confirmed it as soon as he got home that evening.

“Sorry.” He said, not looking sorry at all. “This isn’t how I wanted you to find out.”

That was what he was sorry about?

“You were saving it for some special occasion?” Johnny growled at him.

“Yeah.” Robby confirmed. “The next tournament.”

 _Ofcourse,_ Miguel thought as a chill went down his spine. They’d been fools to think that LaRusso would rely on the same trick twice. First he’d used his daughter to mess with their heads and they’d decided to let girls into Cobra Kai so that wouldn’t work again. But now he was going to use Robby against them – make them fight him. How were they supposed to handle that?

“You are not working for him anymore.” Johnny said firmly. “And you are not training with that asshole either. You want to learn karate? You come to Cobra Kai. Got it?”

“Knew you’d try to ruin this too.” Robby said, sneering. “But I won’t let you. Not this time.”

“Robby, enough!” Johnny yelled. “He’s using you to get to me. Don’t you see that?”

“You got that backwards, _dad_.”

Johnny pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to control himself.

“So that’s it, huh?” He said. “You think if you punish me by training with him, I’ll let you skateboard again? That’s never going to happen.”

“I know.” Robby agreed. “And I don’t care.”

Johnny could end this by putting his foot down, but Miguel hoped he wouldn’t. That would just make Robby hate him more. If they could just explain it to him, find some way to make him see sense…

“I know you want to get back at me.” Johnny said. “But I can’t let you mess up your life in the process. That’s what LaRusso would do to you.”

Robby shook his head, exasperated.

“Let it go, already.” He said. “Mr. LaRusso isn’t like that. He doesn’t give a shit about your rivalry from over 30 years ago. He has moved on.”

“You don’t know the shit he has done.” Johnny said.

“What? Like trying to shut down Cobra Kai?” Robby asked. “That wasn’t about you. He just didn’t want a bunch of new assholes running around and making everyone miserable. And based on what I know of your students, I’m actually sorry that he didn’t succeed.”

“Robby - ”

“And Sam entering the tournament wasn’t about you either, okay?” Robby continued. “She wanted to participate and win – so she did.”

It was no use. LaRusso had already gotten to him. Brainwashed him. Armed him with all the counterarguments. Maybe if they’d found out sooner…

“You hate me that much, do you?” Johnny asked, getting to the crux of the matter. “Enough to humiliate me like this?”

 _Say that you don’t,_ Miguel begged. _Say that you were angry and weren’t thinking straight and went ahead with it without thinking it through. Say that all you want is an apology and you’ll quit._

“Yes.” Robby deadpanned.

“Then maybe you should get out of here.” Johnny’s face was stone now. “You don’t want to live here, right? Then what are you waiting for? Get out!”

Robby stared at him uncertainly.

“I mean it!” Johnny insisted. “Get out!”

Robby shrugged and turned to go to his room, but Johnny stopped him.

“No – you don’t want all that stuff I bought for you, right?” He said. “You don’t want to be saddled with crap from a guy you hate.”

Robby was never the one to back down. “Yeah, you are right.” He said, softly before turning around and walking out the door.

Miguel sat back on the chair, stunned and despairing. How did they manage to lose Robby in the space of one day?

* * *

Johnny didn’t think he’d ever seen Carmen this pissed off. She had every right to be – after what he’d just done. But he wasn’t going to give in. Not this time. Not where that asshole LaRusso was concerned.

“You didn’t hear what he said to me.” Johnny said lifelessly. “He said he hated me.”

“So you kicked him out? Real good parenting there.” She snapped. “He’s a fucking teenager. He’s supposed to hate you from time to time.”

No, this wasn’t just a spat. Robby had been at it for months.

“I don’t care what he said or did.” Carmen said. “You are going right now and you are not coming back without him.”

Johnny shook his head stubbornly. “If I do that now, he’ll have all the power. He’ll think he can get away with anything.”

“This isn’t a game, Johnny.” Carmen shouted.

It wasn’t, but the rules were the same and Robby had won the last round by calling his bluff.

It really was a bluff. Johnny was not the kind of guy to kick a kid out with just the clothes on his back, let alone do that to his own son. He really hadn’t expected Robby to take him up on it.

All he’d needed was a “Dad! Please…” or “C’mon…” and he’d have taken it back. He’d have grounded Robby, told him to stay away from LaRusso and that would’ve been that. He’d never kick Robby out, but once Robby knew of the threat hanging over his head, he’d behave, atleast for the time being.

But Robby had managed to turn the tables. He’d turned around and walked out before Johnny could take his words back and now the threat of losing his son was hanging over his head.

But it wasn’t over just yet. Robby didn’t understand how tough things could be out there. Once he got the taste of the real world…

“It’ll be okay.” He reassured Carmen. “He’s a tough kid. He can survive out there for one night. He’ll be back in the morning, asking to come back and I’ll let him.”

“You sure about that?”

Johnny didn’t see that look on her face often, but he knew what it meant.

“Okay, you have that face which means I’m about to make an ass out of myself.” He said. “So can you save me any more embarrassment and do it already?”

“Amanda called.” Carmen told him smugly. “Robby showed up at their door and she wanted us to know that he was safe. That he could stay with them for as long as needed.”

_Amanda? Who was - ? Amanda LaRusso? Robby went to that asshole?_

Johnny reeled. “He’s staying with the LaRussos?”

“You kicked him out.” Carmen said. “You don’t get to dictate where he lands up. Atleast he had somebody to turn to.”

Dammit. He’d lost this one completely. Ofcourse, Daniel wouldn’t let this chance go. There couldn’t be a more perfect humiliation than stealing his son. And that was worth putting up with a kid he barely knew. And as long as Robby had that place to land, Johnny would have no power over him.

The best he could do now would be to admit he lost this one and get his son back on any terms necessary. He’d figure out the rest later.

“Dammit!” LaRusso said as he opened the door and found Johnny on the other side.

“What? You didn’t think I’d come to get my son.” Johnny asked with narrowed eyes. He didn’t want to fight the guy right now, but he would if he had to.

“Not until tomorrow.” LaRusso replied. “Now I owe Amanda fifty bucks. C’mon in. We need to talk.”

Johnny followed hm inside, trying not to be jealous of how much better he’d done for himself.

“There is nothing to talk about.” He said, sitting down on the couch. “Just tell Robby to come here and we’ll be on our way.”

“I’m not letting Robby go anywhere with you unless I’m sure he’s going to be okay.” Daniel said, sternly.

So it was going to come down to a fight after all.

“It’s none of your business, alright.” Johnny argued. “He’s my son.”

“And he’s my student.” Daniel countered. “That makes it my business.”

“Don’t act like you give a shit about him.” Johnny said scornfully. “We both know you only did it to screw with me.”

“I didn’t even know you were his dad when I took him on.”

“Bullshit.” Johnny said disbelieving.

Daniel pinched the bridge of his nose and took a deep breath.

“Look, it’s the truth.” He explained. “Robby came to us looking for a job and he didn’t have your last name. And the karate thing just happened. He came over with some work one day and saw me practicing. I offered to teach him and he accepted. I had no idea he was your son until a few weeks ago. I wouldn’t have taken him on if I’d known. All I knew about him was that my daughter knew him from school.”

Johnny worked his jaw trying to think of a reply.

“So why did you give him the job in the first place?” He asked.

“Because he seemed like a good kid and I wanted to give him a chance.” Daniel told him. “And he _is_ a good kid. He’s smart and hard-working and sincere. He was just dealt a bad hand in life.”

Johnny bristled at that. What was this asshole implying?

“So you are gonna teach me how to be a father now?” He asked, getting ready to throw the first punch.

“If I could teach you anything…” Daniel shook his head. “No – whatever issues you have with your son are for you to figure out. And they have nothing to do with the issues we have with each-other. I’m not gonna put that on him and if you are smart, you wouldn’t either.”

Johnny paused, letting that sink in. _Does he really take me for a fool? Does he think I’m gonna buy that?_

“You expect me to believe that?” He scoffed. “That _you_ training _my_ son has nothing to do with _me_?”

Daniel sighed. “When he told me he was your son a few weeks ago, I was pissed off too. I wanted to tell him to get out and never show his face around here again. But then I realized that _he_ told me – despite knowing what it could mean, he still confessed the truth.”

Johnny blinked and waited for him to continue. _What is he getting at?_

“You are right. He started working for me to get back at you. And maybe that’s why he started learning karate too.” Daniel continued. “But that changed somewhere along the way. He told me that learning Miyagi-Do was helping him deal with his anger at you. It was helping him be a better person. To be at peace with himself.”

“Well, he can learn that at my dojo from now on.” Johnny insisted.

“It’s never just about fighting, Johnny. I don’t think you ever understood that.” Daniel said sadly. “You teach your students to fight, but you don’t teach them when not to. When they should just let things go. When they should choose forgiveness instead.”

“You wanna start that shit again?” Once again, LaRusso knew nothing about Cobra-Kai. About how much it had changed.

“No.” Daniel agreed. “That never goes anywhere. What I’m saying is that Robby needs Miyagi-Do and he wants it too. So, as long as he keeps coming to me, I’m going to keep teaching him. If you can’t make your peace with that and if you are thinking of punishing him for it, then you can just walk out of here right now. Because Robby would end up back here in a few days anyway.”

“You’ll keep training my son even if I forbid it?” Johnny asked. “Or is it because I forbid it?”

“I’ll train him because he needs me too. That’s all.” Daniel clarified. “That has nothing to do with you.”

Johnny kept looking at him suspiciously, trying to figure out the trap.

“I told him the same thing, by the way.” Daniel added. “I told him that I’m not training him to screw with you. I’ll help him deal with his anger and find some balance – but I won’t bring him into our fight and he is not going to bring me into yours.”

“So you are not gonna pit him against my dojo?” Johnny challenged him. “Against my students?”

“No, I won’t.” Daniel replied. “Look, if my student wants to participate in the tournament, then ofocurse I’ll support him. I’m sure you’d do the same for any of yours. But that has nothing to do with you or your students.”

Johnny nodded, defeated.

 _Who am I kidding?_ He thought. _I was beaten before I ever left the house. No way I can stop Robby from training with this guy now._

But that didn’t matter right now. The only thing on the agenda for the moment was getting Robby back home and keep him there. He’d figure out the rest later. Let LaRusso win this one. He’d get him the next time.

“This doesn’t change anything.” Robby said to him once he got into the car. “I still don’t want to live there.”

“Yeah, well, until you turn eighteen, you are stuck with us and we are stuck with you.” Johnny snapped back. “The day that happens, you can go wherever the fuck you want.”

Carmen might’ve kicked his ass for that, but Johnny didn’t care right now. For years, he’d tried to be a good father to Robby, even accepting his rejection of karate with good grace. But it wasn’t that Robby wasn’t interested in karate, he just didn’t want to be around Johnny. He’d been sending that message to him loud and clear for years and it was about time Johnny accepted it.


	17. Miguel VIII

Psychological warfare – that was the only way to describe the months leading up to the tournament. Robby had started it, but Cobras never backed away from a fight.

Carmen tried to play the peacemaker, ofcourse, but it was too late for that.

“Amanda tells me you’ve been doing great at work.” She asked Robby during dinner.

“Since when are you friends with LaRusso’s wife?” Johnny asked frowning.

“Us girls don’t care about you boys’ dick swinging contests.” Carmen said sweetly, but the warning was still clear. She turned back to Robby. “She tells me if you weren’t still in school, they’d take you on full time.”

“Yeah.” Robby said awkwardly. “Mr. LaRusso told me that there was a job for me there any time I wanted. But I haven’t been able to spend as much time there lately. He has been training me more and telling me that I shouldn't fall behind on my studies.”

“Well, I’m glad _someone_ is paying attention to that.” Carmen agreed. “You can’t let all this karate stupidity affect your studies.”

If Robby was hoping for some kind of reaction from them, he must be sorely disappointed. They were onto him now and they knew better than to let him goad them. No matter how furious he made them.

And Johnny and Miguel weren’t the only ones. The betrayal had reverberated through the ranks of Cobra Kai and everybody was furious with Robby. Despite never officially being a part of Cobra Kai, it’d always felt like Robby belonged to them simply by the virtue of being Johnny’s son. And every single student there loved and respected Johnny to bits. They all felt the same way about this treason. That it could not go unanswered.

Suddenly, it was open season as far as Robby was concerned.

And this time, they had Johnny’s tacit approval.

Sensei had chosen his words very carefully ofcourse. Miyagi-Do were their opponents, but not their enemies. They were to be treated as any other dojo in the Valley. He would not tolerate his students getting into pointless fights. They were all to save their aggression for the tournament. That was the victory that mattered. Outside of that, any student from Miyagi-Do was not to be treated any differently from any student from any other dojo.

The loopholes there were big enough to put your fist through. Robby no longer enjoyed any special protection for being Johnny’s son. And while outright violence was forbidden, there were plenty of ways to mess with someone that were just short of it. And even if it came down to a fight, it wouldn’t matter as long as Robby gave them a good enough reason to pick one.

Once again, Miguel found himself stuck in the middle. Oscillating between trying to get Robby to change his mind by showing how much he cared and lashing out at him.

It wasn’t like he could make Robby listen to him anymore – not like before. He learned that only a few days after the whole moving out incident.

“He didn’t mean in.” Miguel insisted. “He wouldn’t have kicked you out if you’d just apologized.”

“Me? Apologize?” Robby stared at him incredulously.

“Yes!” Miguel said firmly. “You are the one making everybody miserable because you can’t let go of one stupid thing.”

“You are both the same.” Robby said, shaking his head and started to walk out of the room.

Miguel lost his temper at him. He was trying to be reasonable but Robby wasn’t leaving him with a choice.

“We are not done here.” He said, grabbing Robby’s collar and pulling him backwards. He was willing to start spanking him again if that was what it took to get him back in line.

But Robby twisted under his arm, slipping out of his grip. Miguel instinctively swung his fist and Robby blocked it, returning with a palm to his chest that made the air go out of his lungs and landed him on his ass a few feet away from where he’d been. Miguel stared up shock as Robby took a fighting stance, fists and legs all aligned in a perfect defensive posture.

“Not gonna be easy making me your bitch anymore.” Robby said to him.

The Cobra in Miguel reared at the prospect of a fight, but something else stopped him. He knew he’d win – he’d had years of training on Robby after all – but at what cost? That counter had showed him that he no longer had the overwhelming advantage that he used to and beating Robby up wasn’t going to cow him into submission either. Not anymore.

“I don’t want to fight you.” Miguel said.

“No, you don’t.” Robby agreed.

Miguel got up, clearing his head and tried reasoning with him again.

“Look, we can’t keep hurting each-other.” He pleaded.

Robby looked at him carefully for a moment.

“I’m just doing something I like.” He said, finally. “If that hurts you, then that’s your problem.”

It didn’t work like that. Robby understood that right? He was just using the argument to rationalize being an asshole to them.

* * *

Well, the argument worked both ways. If Robby insisted on sticking to it, let him learn that the hard way. The other Cobras were also simply doing what they liked. If that hurt Robby – well, then that was his problem.

It wasn’t easy for Miguel to tamp down the guilt and his protective instinct. Not when he saw Robby stare at the word “FAG” spray-painted on his locker in big red letters. And it certainly wasn’t easy when he opened it and a whole bunch of plastic dildos fell out of there.

He could barely contain his fury as he saw Hawk and his other friends roar in laughter. But he restrained himself. Robby had to learn about actions and consequences. And these were the consequences of betraying them and siding with Miyagi-Do. If he wanted it to stop, then he knew what he had to do.

A crowd had gathered already, whispering and sniggering and Robby stood there flushed with embarrassment. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Samantha Larusso step forward and practically charge at the Cobras, but Robby grabbed her by the arm and talked her down.

That was only the beginning. Another time, Miguel found his friends staying back after school and laughing about something.

“We’re teaching that asshole a lesson.” Hawk told him. “We stole his clothes when he was in the shower and we are gonna make him walk home naked.”

Miguel’s eyes widened in horror. School was over an hour ago.

“Okay. That’s enough.” He snapped, taking Robby’s clothes from them and going back inside.

He found Robby hiding in the locker-room without a stitch of clothing to cover himself up. He was sitting there, hands on his crotch, looking lost and forlorn. He looked up scared when Miguel came in but that turned to anger the moment he saw his clothes in his hand.

“I didn’t take them, okay?” Miguel clarified quickly. “I’m here to give them back.”

“Let me guess. You want me to blow you to earn them back?” Robby sneered.

Miguel gave him an exasperated shake of head and threw him his clothes back.

“You are doing this to yourself, you know?” He said as he watched him slide his underwear up his legs. “This will all stop as soon as you quit Miyagi-Do.”

Robby scoffed in disbelief. He was nothing if not stubborn to a fault.

“Do your worst.” He replied.

* * *

Nobody really knew how to handle Robby anymore. He was doing it to get a reaction out of them, so to let that work was obviously not the answer. But pretending that nothing was wrong wasn’t working either. They’d thought that he’d get bored and quit after a while, but it seemed like he was getting more and more committed to Miyagi-Do.

This time, things got really awkward when his birthday rolled around and Johnny tried to use that to extend an olive branch.

“We could have a party?” He offered. “Invite some friends over?”

“I don’t have any friends.” Robby stated, matter-of-fact. “Your Cobras made sure of that.”

That was partially true. Robby had never had any close friends, but there were people he used to hang out with every now and then. But the seniors who’d liked him had graduated and gone away, he couldn’t hang out with guys from the skate-park anymore and now that Cobra Kai had put a target on his back, everyone else was giving him a wide berth as well.

The only one not afraid to hang out with Robby in public was Samantha LaRusso and there was no chance in hell that she was ever stepping foot through their doors.

“Well, we can do a family thing.” Johnny suggested, ignoring the insult.

Robby gave him a calculating look.

“You really want to spend the whole day with me?” He asked with narrowed eyes.

Miguel watched Johnny’s jaw clench. They weren’t on good terms. They barely spoke to each-other nowadays. But Johnny was willing to put that aside. To grit his teeth and surrender a little even though it went against every instinct he had. Why couldn’t Robby see that?

“I don’t want you to spend the day miserable and alone like last year.” Johnny said, diplomatically.

Robby nodded, satisfied with the answer.

“You don’t have to worry about that.” He said. “I already asked Mr. LaRusso if I can spend the day with him. He’s taking me to the woods to train.”

“Dude, what’s wrong with you?” Miguel couldn’t keep it in any longer. He may have been outnumbered, but Robby knew exactly how to strike to make it count the most.

“Miguel, it’s okay.” Johnny said with his eye twitching. “We should all get to do what we want, right?”

Robby was gone from home all of his birthday. He left early morning with his backpack before breakfast – before giving them a chance to wish him. Carmen still insisted on making a birthday dinner for him. It was just a day-trip, she said, and he was supposed to be back by evening. They all sat there at the dinner table, waiting for him to return.

 _“Whn r u getting back?”_ Miguel texted him, impatiently.

“ _Dinner at LaRussos. B back l8._ ” Came the reply a minute later.

“He’s not coming.” Miguel told everyone there and Johnny nodded like he’d expected it.

“He’s testing you.” Miguel heard his mom tell his dad later that night. “He wants to know that you’ll love him no matter what.”

“I’m letting him train with that asshole, aren’t I?” Johnny replied. “What more does he want from me?”

Could his mom be right? Miguel wondered. No, they’d shown Robby that they loved him over and over again, so he had to know that already. And that was what he was using against them. Showing him how much they cared now would just give him more ammunition.

Or maybe it’d be more like killing him with kindness. That was possible, right? Show him that they loved him no matter how much he hurt them and his own guilt would disarm him. Because underneath it all, Robby was still a good guy and he still cared about them. Miguel knew those things for certain.

He tried it out that very night when Robby came back. He looked different somehow. Happier. Calmer. Like the tension he always carried in his shoulders was gone for once.

“Your birthday’s not over yet.” Miguel said to him hesitating a little. “And I forgot to buy you a gift this time.”

“Okay?” Robby eyed him suspiciously.

“Thought I’d go with a regift this time.” He smiled before leaning down and kissing Robby on the lips.

Robby was stiff as a board in the beginning but Miguel made him relax in his arms. He felt his lips part under his insistent tongue and his hands reach up to grab his shoulders. Miguel’s own moved down his back, down to his ass, grabbing his cheek and pulling him closer. Moaned softly into his mouth as Miguel rubbed his leg against Robby’s growing erection.

Miguel broke the kiss and unbuttoned Robby’s shirt, kissing his way down his sculpted chest, down his flexed abs and down the treasure trail until he was at the waistband of his jeans. He unbuttoned and unzipped it, as Robby’s shirt slid down his arms. He felt a hesitant hand in his hair and looked up to see Robby looking down at him with hooded, confused eyes.

“You’ve never sucked me off before.” Robby said tentatively.

That was true, Miguel realized guiltily. After all the times Robby had done that for him, it was high time he returned the favor.

“I was saving it for a special occasion.” Miguel replied, smiling.

He pulled the jeans and underwear down in a smooth motion and Robby’s cock sprang free, slapping against his abs. The first lick at the head made his knees wobble and Miguel helped him lower down on the bed. He pulled Robby’s remaining clothes off the rest of the way.

He was beautiful like this – naked and spread out under him, gasping softly as Miguel worshipped his cock. He licked and slurped the tool, swirling his tongue around the engorged head before swallowing it down.

“Ah! Teeth.” Robby moaned and Miguel immediately covered them with his lips.

Miguel had no idea what he was doing, he realized. He’d had plenty of blowjobs from Robby and he’d figured he’d just do what Robby did – but he had no clue how to get his mouth to do the same things.

Well, it wasn’t like Robby had been an expert his first time either. Miguel would figure it out. And until then, he’d try some other stuff – like playing with his balls and rubbing his wet fingers all the way from his taint to his asshole. 

And Robby was liking it too. He was moaning wantonly. His hand was in Miguel’s hair, almost, but not quite, pushing his head down. His hips jerked and stuttered as if he was resisting the urge to push in deeper. But there was going to be no deeper. Robby’s pubes were already tickling Miguel’s nose and he could feel his dickhead against the back of his throat.

Miguel slurped harder, bobbing his head up and down and making Robby mewl with pleasure. He probably couldn’t keep his teeth out of the way completely, but Robby seemed beyond caring at that point. Miguel could feel his thighs trembling and his balls tightening up.

“Close.” Robby warned him. “I’m close.”

Miguel pushed his finger inside, driving Robby over the edge. Spurt after spurt emptied into Miguel’s mouth and he swallowed it whole. He pulled off Robby’s cock with a pop and looked up while Robby lay there with a blissed out look on his face.

“Turn around.” Miguel said, pushing at his ass.

Robby nodded, following his direction and his hand reached up to grab the lube from the headboard. But Miguel stopped him.

“No. I mean – just – lie down on your side.” Miguel took his clothes off before turning off the lights. He was hard as a rock, sure, but he had no intention of fucking Robby tonight.

He got in bed behind him, spooning him with his erection nestled between his legs. Robby seemed confused but leaned back into his embrace anyway and Miguel kissed his neck, holding him closer.

“You don’t need to worry about the tournament, okay?” He whispered as they both got drowsy. “We’ll both do our best and whoever wins, wins.”

“Not sure I’m even gonna participate.” Robby whispered back.

That shook Miguel awake. LaRusso’s big plan – to use Robby to mess with their heads – that wasn’t going to work if Robby didn’t play his part.

“I thought you said - ” Miguel started.

“I know.” Robby cut him off. “But I can’t do it for the wrong reasons. And I’m not sure I have the right reasons.”

Miguel smiled and pulled him in closer. Mom was right after all. Even so, Miguel hadn’t expected it to work this fast. He couldn’t help but fall asleep grinning that night.

* * *

Things didn’t get better right away, ofcourse. Robby still kept training with LaRusso and he didn’t actually say that he wasn’t going to participate. But he was atleast considering the possibility and he was less snarky with Johnny in the following days. The door was open just a crack and that was good enough for Miguel for now.

Even though everything else was still going to hell.

Things were still escalating with Hawk and others. They kept calling Robby names, yelling insults at him at school and for the most part, Robby ignored them. But then one time, Hawk made the mistake of slapping his ass when he walked by and Robby swung around immediately, elbowing him in the face.

All hell almost broke lose that day, if not for Miguel. He rushed forward, holding Hawk back from retaliating and making other Cobras back off as well. They all had more experience than Robby, every single one of them and Miguel really didn’t want Robby to get his ass kicked.

He couldn’t be around all the time, however. And Hawk was more determined, more fiercely loyal to Cobra Kai than he knew. He found that out when Hawk and four others showed up with bruises on their faces one day.

“That asshole Keene sucker-punched us.” Hawk told him.

“All five of you?” Miguel asked, wondering. No way Robby was that tough already.

“Sam was with him.” Hawk replied.

That made it more palatable. Sam was a tough customer, Miguel had to admit that much. Even though he’d been hesitant and confused during their match last year, he couldn’t deny her skill. He could definitely see her beating Hawk, especially if Hawk was still hesitant about fighting a girl. That was something both Miguel and Johnny were learning from Aisha and Tory at the dojo – girls could be just as tough as guys.

Even so, fighting two against five and coming out of it with barely a scratch was goddamn impressive. Robby was a natural at this after all and if he’d joined Cobra Kai all those years ago, he might’ve ended up better than Miguel.

“You better control your asshole students, alright?” Robby told Johnny that evening.

“Hawk told me what happened.” Johnny said. “He said you were out with that girl. Are you dating? You know you are still not allowed, right?”

“She is just a friend.” Robby replied. “My only friend. So you keep those assholes away from her.”

“They’re good kids.” Johnny snapped. “They just have a hard time dealing with traitors.”

“Fine.” Robby snapped back. “Keep sending them after me. And I’ll keep kicking their ass.”

“I didn’t send them after you.” Johnny insisted. “I’ll talk to them, alright. They won’t bother you any more.”

Once again, Miguel found himself torn between the two sides. Ofcourse he understood where Hawk was coming from, but the idiocy of it galled at him. They had to find a way to win Robby back and Hawk’s actions were just pushing him further away. And undoing all the progress Miguel had manage to make.

* * *

“We are not all assholes, you know?” He said to Robby, nuzzling his hair while his hand was shoved down his pants, stroking him to hardness. “You don’t think I’m an asshole, do you?”

“Yes, you are.” Robby replied, pushing his ass back into Miguel’s crotch. “You’ve been an asshole to me plenty of times.”

Miguel couldn’t deny that. So instead he said, “Sorry. How about I make it up to you?”

Robby obediently lifted his arms and Miguel pulled his shirt off, sliding his hands along his sides along the way. He unzipped his jeans and let them fall to the floor and stroked Robby’s round cheeks through his underwear.

“I love it when you wear briefs.” He whispered, squeezing and pinching. “I love how it makes your ass look.”

Robby moaned and Miguel pushed him forward on the bed, taking his own shirt and shorts off. He rubbed his erection against Robby’s butt through the two layers as he sucked a bruise on the back of his neck. Then he kissed his way down Robby’s spine, pulling the last article of clothing down his legs and exposing his pale asscheeks to the view. He spread them and admired the view in what felt like a long time.

It was still pink and furled, but now it had tufts of hair around it in a ring – even though the rest of Robby’s ass was hairless and creamy smooth. Robby was pushing his ass back, looking for contact and his hole twitched in anticipation, which made Miguel’s cock jerk as well. He let his saliva collect in his mouth and then let it drool down in a stream, landing on top of Robby’s asscrack and slowly sliding down the cleft. Robby shivered under his hands and Miguel leaned down, finally getting to what he should’ve done ages ago.

He caught his spit with his tongue right as it rolled over the asshole with a broad swipe. Robby moaned and shuddered under him and Miguel wrapped his arms around his thighs pulling him closer pushing his face in deeper. He rimmed those gasps out of the smaller boy, pushing his tongue against the entrance before going back to circling it and licking it.

Robby was already a mess by the time he pushed his first finger in. Miguel could tell that he was already ready to blow and pinched the base of his cock to stop that from happening. By the time Miguel was three fngers deep, Robby was writhing and moaning, pushed his ass into Miguel’s face, unable to decide whether he wanted more or less.

Miguel pulled out and Robby let out a frustrated whine, pushing his ass back, looking for contact. Miguel got up and flipped him over before pushing his own boxers down, finally freeing his erection. He grabbed Robby’s legs and bent him in half, putting his ankles on his shoulders as he lined up his cock with the twitching asshole.

He paused for a moment, looking down at Robby all desperate and needs and then bottomed out in one smooth motion. Robby keened, arching his hips up and his hands desperately grabbed at Miguel’s neck, trying to find purchase and trying to pull him closer.

“Move.” Robby ordered and Miguel complied.

He pulled almost all the way out until his bulging mushroom head caught the rim and then slammed back in almost immediately. He repeated the motion, matching the rhythm to Robby’s moans. Robby was hot as a furnace around his cock, the tight silky walls of his channel clenching like they were trying to squeeze the cum out of him. And the way Robby sucked in his breath, Miguel knew he was hitting that spot inside him just right.

He leaned down without breaking the rhythm and Robby leaned up for the kiss. Miguel drew back at the last second, enjoying the way Robby desperately craned his neck, trying to get to his mouth. He did it a few more times until Robby growled in frustration and then he moved in, shoving his tongue down Robby’s throat. 

He could feel his hips stutter and his balls tighten up. He was close, he knew. He snaked down his hand between them to grab Robby and jerk him off as well.

Robby came as soon as Miguel’s fist closed around him, moaning into his mouth and gushing cum on their abs. He spasmed around Miguel’s cock, pushing him over the edge and Miguel filled him up with his seed. Robby writhed through their orgasm, trying to get Miguel in deeper into him even after his balls had emptied.

“Was that or was that not the best sex you’ve ever had?” Miguel as cheekily, lying on top of Robby and licking circles around his nipple.

Robby looked at him scared for a moment, his lower lip trembling. But then that look was replaced by one of indifference.

“I’ve had better.” He said, casually.

“Asshole!” Miguel was indignant as abut down playfully at his nipple. “Say that it was the best.”

Robby shrugged and smirked. “Top five – that’s the best I can do.”

Miguel pouted at him. “You know what? Let's see if we can't do better.”

Miguel was back on top of him, kissing him all sloppy and messy. They were both too spent to get hard again, but Miguel knew that they’d have fucked a second time right then if they could. And he knew Robby felt the same with the way he wrapped his arms and legs around Miguel, pulling him in closer than he’d have thought possible.

The admission came later that night as they were drifting off to sleep wrapped up in each-others’ arms. Robby must have thought him asleep and his voice was barely above a whisper.

“It was everything I ever wanted it to be.” He said into Miguel’s chest.

It was working – Miguel’s weird, twisted “love-therapy”. Robby was acting nicer around them. Like this time, he actually helped Johnny fix his car. He’d learned about that at LaRusso Auto, but he never even brought that up while helping them.

It wasn’t all the way, though. And it wasn’t perfect. Too much had changed for Miguel to figure it all out right away.

Like now he was actually afraid of taking things too far when they were roughhousing. Before, he’d been so confident of his ability to dominate Robby without hurting him that this possibility had never bothered him. But Robby’s was stronger now and their bouts let them both red-faced and panting.

All it’d take is one of them throwing a punch and the playful wrestling would turn into an all-out, bare-knuckled fight. Miguel knew he’d still win – but he also knew he wouldn’t be able to do it without getting hurt or hurting Robby. And he didn’t want to give him any reason to get pissed off at him again. So he always stopped them before things went too far, much to Robby’s obvious disappointment. Miguel knew that Robby wanted to measure his new-found strength, but Miguel didn’t want to humiliate him by showing him that he was still weaker. Nor would the Cobra in him allow him to lose a fight on purpose.

* * *

Maybe he tested the waters too soon. They were still over two months away from the tournament after all. And Robby not participating should’ve been good enough for now. Atleast Johnny could’ve avoided the humiliation of having his own son fight for the enemy’s dojo. And then, when LaRusso turned on Robby for his plan imploding, things would’ve resolved themselves.

So maybe Miguel made a mistake in asking Robby if he was ready to quit Miyagi-Do and join Cobra-Kai already.

“Not a chance in hell!” Robby replied incredulously. “I’m never joining Cobra-Kai – thought I made that pretty clear already.”

“But I thought…” Miguel started, then stopped. He wasn’t sure what he thought, actually.

“I thought you understood.” Robby said, disappointed. “But you are just like dad. You don’t get it at all.”

 _Get what?_ Miguel thought angrily as Robby walked away. _That getting your revenge is more important? That there is no way you can compromise until we surrender to all your demands? That this war had to end with your absolute victory, no matter how much that hurt both sides?_

That must have been it. That’s what led Robby to pull a stunt like that.

“ _Lockerroom! Now!_ ” Miguel got that text from him after school the next day and he wasn’t sure what to expect when he got there. Maybe a naughty tryst to show him that yesterday’s disagreement was already forgotten. Or at worst, a challenge for them to fight things out once and for all.

Never in his wildest nightmares could he have expected _this._

Tony’s naked back was the first thing Miguel saw as he got in, his muscular assheeks flexing as he thrust against the wall. And then he saw Robby between Tony and the wall, his arms and legs wrapped around the bigger boy like a spider-monkey as Tony’s cock rammed into his ass. His head was thrown back in ecstasy and his eyes were rolled back so that all Miguel could see where the whites.

Miguel was too shocked to respond. Too frozen in place to act on his instinct to rush over and pull his friend off his Robby. He stood there, rooted in place, mouth opening and closing like a fish as Robby moaned like a two-dollar whore.

Robby finally looked ahead and his eyes met Miguel’s. “Miguel! You came.” He said, smiling wide.

That broke the spell.

“What the hell is going on here?” He asked loudly.

“What does it look like?” Hawk replied. “We are showing the fag where he belongs.”

Miguel noticed the others for the first time just as they noticed him. There were five of them in total – the same five Robby and Sam had beaten at the mall – all in various states of undress. Hawk was shirtless with his slacks shoved down to his knees as he stroked his cock hard.

 _They are doing this to Robby,_ Miguel thought, feeling cold all over. _Robby hates them. He’d never want them to fuck him. So they surrounded him and they were forcing him into it._

“Y-you can’t hurt him.” Miguel stammered out.

“Does it look like we are hurting him?” Hawk scoffed. “Bitch wants it.”

Tony let Robby down, pulling out of him at the same time and the way Robby whined told Miguel that he was enjoying it. As did his cock hard and leaking between his legs. He wasn’t hurt either, Miguel could see that clearly. It wasn’t like Robby would give up without a fight – not now. And they couldn’t have overpowered him without atleast a few bumps and bruises along the way.

Which meant Robby wanted this. That he’d agreed to this.

Miguel felt a pain in his chest like never before. He felt something claw at his throat and his vision went blurry for a moment. When it cleared, he saw Robby on all fours, ass spread in front of Tony who slammed back in again.

Tony yanked his head back by his hair and Robby’s eyes met Miguel’s again.

“Stop staring and do something.” He said, annoyance clear in his voice.

What kind of sick, twisted game was he playing? Did he want Miguel to join in? Did he actually think Miguel would? He could barely keep his disgust hidden.

Hawk stepped in front of him instead, getting on his knees and swinging his cock in Robby’s face.

“Here.” He said, “Put your mouth to some good use.”

Robby latched on to in immediately and started slurping and sucking right away. Hawk grabbed his head in response and shoved himself in deeper. And Miguel could do nothing but watch Robby getting spit-roasted between them.

 _“Don’t think you are the only one who can do that.”_ The words came back to him. Robby had said them in throes of passion and now he was proving them. Showing Miguel exactly how much their time together meant to him. It was the same threat as the one he’d leveled against Johnny. _Others can give me what I want too –_ with Johnny, he’d used LaRusso and with Miguel now… he was using his friends.

Miguel couldn’t watch anymore. He turned around and practically ran away before tears could overwhelm him.

He wasn’t going to forgive Robby. Not this time. Sure he loved him, but he had feelings too. So he schooled his face into an expression of anger and didn’t let Robby see an ounce of heartbreak when he came home that day.

“Have fun?” Miguel asked, sneering when he came into the room.

“Loads.” Robby replied blandly.

His eyes looked dead. He was regretting it already – Miguel could see that. But that wasn’t good enough. Not this time. This time, he wouldn’t forgive Robby until he begged for it.

“Sorry I couldn’t stay. But with that many cocks in you, I doubt you were going to miss another one.” Miguel’s word were meant to hurt.

And they did. Robby flinched like he’d been hit but didn’t say anything. Angrily, Miguel walked over and shoved his hand down the back of Robby’s pants.

“Are they still in there?” He asked, rooting around. “Or did they cum down your throat instead?”

Robby stood there and let him. He’d showered after. Miguel could smell soap on his skin. His asshole was dry – clean – but that didn’t erase Miguel’s memory of Tony shoving his cock in there. Miguel shoved a finger in and Robby choked back a sob.

There was a knock on the door and Miguel immediately pulled his hand out, putting some distance between them. Things almost looked normal when Johnny walked into their room.

“Listen, uh – something wrong?” As oblivious as Johnny could be sometimes, there was no missing the tension between them.

“No.” Miguel said, shaking his head.

“Yes.” Robby contradicted, turning around. “I thought you were going to keep your asshole students under control.”

Johnny looked at him closely, searching for any signs of a fight and Miguel wondered if this was part of the plan to. Use this to turn Johnny against his students.

“What happened?” He asked frowning.

Miguel felt dread for a moment. If this came out, the rest of it would too and Johnny would end up hating both of them. But apparently, Robby wasn’t ready for the truth to come out either.

“They messed with me.” He said, as if that answer was going to be enough.

“They didn’t hurt you.” Miguel said, confidently. They hadn’t, had they? Robby wasn’t limping or standing oddly.

“They still messed with me.” Robby insisted. “Thought you were going to put a stop to that.”

That wasn’t fair, Miguel thought. Johnny had told them not to hurt Robby and they’d obeyed.

“Sorry, kid. You can’t have it both ways.” Johnny told Robby. “You want my protection, you have to do what I say. But you don’t want that, right? LaRusso taught you to take care of it?”

Robby’s eyes narrowed. “Yeah. He did.”

 _Good,_ Miguel thought. That was fair. Robby couldn’t expect to keep getting away with shit. For once, he was not going to have things his way.

Robby picked a fight with Hawk, Tony and Mitch the other day and Miguel had to fight his instincts not to step in. A 3-on-1 fight between experienced fighters and a newbie was so not fair that it wasn’t even funny. All those times Miguel had stepped into fights like that and this was when he chose not to? He felt disgusted with himself for that, but he stuck to his guns. Let them teach Robby a lesson. He’d stop it if they went too far, but maybe that would knock some sense into his head.

Except, Robby was the one left standing in the end and the three of them were curled up groaning on the floor. Miguel was too shocked to even notice the other students cheering. He was too shocked to move when a teacher dragged Robby away. The only thing he heard was what Robby had said to his fallen opponent.

“Let’s do this again at the tournament.”

So he _was_ going to participate after all. All that talk about right reasons meant nothing in the end. And he was good. Better than good – he was great. He had a pretty good chance of winning for real. Miguel had been so sure that his experience would win out in the end, but now… how the hell had he gotten so strong? What the hell was LaRusso teaching him?


	18. Miguel IX

Miguel was going to beat Robby. That was the only way to really get through to him.

Johnny was royally pissed off when he heard what happened. He yelled at Robby and Robby yelled right back that it wasn’t his problem that his students were a bunch of pussies. Johnny had no answer to that and Miguel didn’t either. Robby had completely dominated that fight after all.

And for the next two months, they were like strangers living together. Whatever fire they had between them had gone out in an instant and all they felt now was simmering resentment. They both gave each-other a wide berth, focusing on preparing for the tournament instead.

And after that fight, the rest of the Cobras left Robby alone as well.

But it wasn’t enough, Miguel decided. He was no longer sure he could beat Robby and that doubt itself could lead to defeat. It wasn’t just Robby’s new skills. Miguel had never doubted his own abilities. It was how Robby was in his head now. It was how all his conflicting feelings were making him uncertain, making him unsure of whether he wanted to hurt Robby at all.

That was how LaRusso operated, right? He got into your head and played mind-games and you ended up losing before you ever started. He must have taught Robby these mind-games too. Robby had an edge over him and Miguel needed one too, to level the playing field.

But how to find one?

The thought came to him a few days before the tournament and he pushed it right away. That would’ve been unacceptable.

It came back the next day and Miguel actually considered it this time.

Robby’s diary. No – his journal. Girls had diaries and guys had journals. The one that Carmen had given him two years ago and the same one he poured all his thoughts and feelings into. There was bound to be something there, right? Some secret that Miguel could use to throw him off his game?

Getting to it would be ridiculously easy. Robby used to guard it jealously, but once it was clear that no one was interested in reading it, he began leaving it in his unlocked desk-drawer. Miguel could just slide it open and read it right away.

But was he really going to do this? Invade Robby’s privacy like that?

Miguel deliberated and dithered until the morning of the tournament, hoping something better would turn up. Nothing did and it was now or never. Robby had already left for the LaRussos and Miguel would have to leave in a couple of hours as well. This was his last chance for finding dirt on Robby. Or else he’d just have to fight with a handicap.

Locking his door and taking a deep breath, he pulled the drawer open and took out the journal.

* * *

_“Mom, where are you?”_ Miguel blinked as he read the first entry. _“I hate it here. Nobody loves me and nobody wants me here. Carmen and Rosa are nice, but I know that they still hate me for what I said to her that day. And Miguel hits me and humiliates me whenever he wants. Strips me naked and spanks me. Pins me down, tickles and teases me and I can’t do anything about it. And dad doesn’t stop him either – even when he does it right in front of him. Just shrugs it off as boys playing around. Somehow he never notices that I can never do that to Miguel.”_

_“That’s because he doesn’t care. He never cared about me. He went months without talking to me. Forgot my birthdays. Didn’t show up for my games. He’s only putting up with me now because he has to. But that’ll change once you get back right? When are you getting back?”_

_“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for whatever I did to make you go away. I’ll be better, I promise. Just come back and take me away from here.”_

Miguel crushed the rising bubble of guilt inside him. He had been pretty nasty to Robby when they’d first started living together, right? But that was years ago. Things were different between them. And he didn’t have to read through pages of self-pitying whining now. There wouldn’t be anything in there anyway.

He flipped through the pages, landing on another entry.

_“Dad finally hit me today. I didn’t think he’d ever actually do it. But in some other way, I feel like I’ve been waiting for this day my entire life. For him to finally stop pretending and show me how he really feels.”_

_“They all told me. All in their own way. Miguel told me to my face that no one could love me. Dad told me by ignoring me and not even telling me that he had opened Cobra Kai, much less inviting me. And mom told me by ditching me and disappearing on me. They say it’s because of the booze, but I know the truth. I drove her to it. I was the one who…”_

Miguel set his jaw and flipped ahead again. It wasn’t his fault. Robby was just too goddamn sensitive.

_“Why did it have to be him? Why did I have to fall in love with a bully?”_ Miguel blinked. Did Robby mean him? _Him_? A bully? _“I know he is a nice guy to everyone except for me. And maybe I want him to be nice to me too. And he is a lot of times. Like when he is all gentle and sweet and makes me feel so, so good. But he doesn’t love me back. And I somehow bring out that mean side of him that makes him want to hurt me. And I don’t even know what I’m doing wrong.”_

_“If Miguel actually cared, he’d never let Hawk or his other friends do that stuff to me. I know dad’s gonna shrug it off. What does he care that Hawk keeps kicking me in the balls, right? But I didn’t think Miguel would actually gang up on me with Hawk. I’m not even strong enough to deal with one of them. How am I supposed to handle both?”_

_“That day was the most humiliating experience of my life. When Miguel held me down, stripped me naked and let Hawk play with me like a toy. He made me suck them off and then he fingered me right in front of him. And Hawk kept calling me a bitch and a fag. I wasn’t going to humiliate myself even more by begging them to stop, but if Miguel had cared, he’d have seen it anyway.“_

_“Miguel’s right. I’m a freak. A weirdo. Something sick and twisted. How else do you explain me still loving Miguel, right?”_

“No, you are not!” Miguel said out loud. It’d been his fault. He already knew he’d screwed up bad that day and he’d apologized – but he had no idea how horrible Robby had felt about it.

_“Hawk showed up again today. Guess he has some sort of arrangement with Miguel. Miguel is too busy with his girlfriend to use me – so Hawk gets to use me instead. And maybe his other friends would get in on it too.”_

_“He wanted it to hurt today. He was in that kind of mood. He punched me in the stomach and kneed my balls. And then he choked me and told me to finger myself open. He sat on me, rubbing his butt in my face while he twisted my dick. He usually lets me stretch properly but he was too impatient today. It really hurt when he fucked me, but I guess it’s a good thing he doesn’t last long…”_

Miguel’s hands shook as he flipped ahead.

Lies. These were all lies. Some sick fantasy that Robby was playing out by writing about it. Hawk would NEVER do something like that. Especially not to someone Miguel loved. He’d never betray…

Did he though? Miguel was the one who started it. Showed him that it was okay to mess with Robby. And sure, he’d told him to lay off after a while, but…

And the more entries Miguel read the more it seemed like there was a grain of truth to them. For example, he knew that Hawk had come over hang out with Robby that day Miguel had been at the mall. He never knew what they did together but…

No. Nobody hurt Robby like that. Not if Miguel could help it. Robby would’ve told them if it was true and he’d have kicked Hawk’s ass for this, friend or no friend.

_“This is my punishment, right? For messing up what he had going on with Tory? Don’t think he meant it, but there had to be some anger that he was letting out.”_

_“It hurt like hell when Miguel fucked me. I wasn’t loose enough and it felt like he was splitting me apart and burning me from the inside at the same time. The sick thing was that he still managed to make me cum. How twisted is that?”_

_“I somehow managed not to scream. Not to let him see me cry. He wouldn’t have cared anyway – not with how he was shoving my face in the pillow while he rammed into me. But I don’t think I can do that again. I’m still sore and it still hurts to sit down. And every day, I dread that he’d want to do it again. I’m somehow keeping him happy with blowjobs and handjobs right now, but I know he enjoyed it and it’s only a matter of time.”_

He didn’t. He hadn’t. He’d never hurt Robby like that. Robby had enjoyed it. Every second of it. This was proof that this journal was full of lies.

_“I won’t feel guilty. I won’t. I won’t. I won’t. He forgot my birthday for years. Not even a phone-call. How was I supposed to know that he’d remember this year? How was I supposed to know that he was throwing a party? Even mom never did that.”_

_“It wasn’t a party for me anyway. It was for Miguel and his friends from Cobra Kai. The same ones who bully me every day. If Dad thinks that I want to be anywhere around them on my birthday…”_

Miguel skipped ahead again. Lies mixed with truth.

_“It shouldn’t hurt this much. I’ve known that dad doesn’t care about me for years. So why does it hurt just as much every single time?”_

_“Skateboarding was the one good thing in my life and he took that away from me too. And with that bullshit excuse about caring for my safety. I’ve been doing it for years. I’ve fallen like that more than once before. Hell, I even broke my arm right in front of him. He never gave a shit about any of that. But the moment Miguel starts getting into it…”_

_“It’s not my safety he cares about. It’s Miguel’s. He saw Miguel fall down like that and freaked out and now I have to pay the price.”_

_“But so will he. I’ll make him pay for this. And I already know LaRusso has beaten him before. Maybe he can help me do that again.”_

Now they were getting to it. Robby was so wrong about so many things, but Miguel could handle that later. Getting through to Robby was the priority right now.

He skimmed ahead, going through the fantasies of how he’d reveal the truth to Johnny, until he found something different.

_“I screwed up. I screwed up real bad. Mr. LaRusso is right. Dad had never **seen** me fall before. He saw the video and said he’d have done the same thing. So that means dad still cared a little back then? But whatever chance we had, I destroyed it by training with Mr. LaRusso and telling him I want to move out. He’ll never forgive me for that.”_

Yes, he would. All Robby had to do was apologize and quit Miyagi-Do. He wouldn’t even need to join Cobra Kai. Surely he knew that.

_“I can’t quit Miyagi-Do. It’s not even about getting back at dad. It’s the only thing that makes me feel sane. The things that have been clawing at me from the inside for years are finally starting to quiet down. Mr. LaRusso has been teaching me to focus on the good, to find balance, to find peace. It doesn’t even matter what those Cobras yell at me – I’m learning to be at peace with myself.”_

_“Mr. LaRusso is right. I can’t fight in the tournament just to get back at my dad. And if I don’t have any good reason to do so, I shouldn’t fight at all. He’s right about making my peace with dad too. He’d never love me as much as he could’ve and definitely not as much as he loves Miguel, but maybe we can find a way to be okay with each-other? But I’m not strong enough to do that on my own. I need Mr. LaRusso to help me. He’s the only one who gets me. Who actually gives a shit right now. How am I supposed to do this without him?”_

No – that was wrong. All wrong. LaRusso was supposed to be using Robby. Turning him against them. Miguel was the one actually getting through to him.

“ _You don’t get it at all._ ” He remembered Robby say and wondered if this was what he’d meant.

_“What do I want with my life? That’s what Mr. LaRusso asked me today. And I had no answer. I’ve been stuck in this cycle so long – disappointing people and getting disappointed. Hurting and getting hurt. And I still don’t see a way out of it.”_

_“Even now, I’m still stuck in it. Dad’s getting back at me through his students and I deserve it. They keep coming after me, messing with me and dad does nothing to stop them. Maybe he would’ve last year, but that was before I destroyed any last chance we had of making things right. The best I can hope for now is to get out of this miserable situation.”_

_“But living alone would be miserable too. I found that out right after mom left me. It feels like there is no hope for future at all. So maybe it’d be better not to have one either.”_

A chill went through Miguel at those words. He’s just venting, he told himself. There was no way Robby actually thought like that.

_“They raped me.”_

Miguel blinked and read the line again.

_“They raped me. Hawk and his friends. They called it teaching me a lesson, they said I wanted it, that I deserved it, but that’s what it was. I still don’t know how they managed to slip me the drugs or what drugs they were. I just remember feeling hot and dizzy in the last period and heading to the nurse’s office and then someone grabbed me.”_

_“I don’t remember much from the whole thing – but I do remember that Miguel showed up at some point. I was so happy to see him. I was so sure he’d put a stop to it. He has been acting so nice to me lately – so kind and loving. But he didn’t do anything. He just looked at me in disgust and walked away.”_

_“Did he put them up to it? As punishment for not quitting Miyagi-Do? Miguel wouldn’t do that, right? He’s not that kind of a guy. But then why would he just watch them doing that to me and do nothing? He hates me that much?”_

_“I know dad does. I know he doesn’t know the whole truth but he told his students to go after me. So he wouldn’t care what they did to me.”_

_“I won’t forgive them for this. Neither of them. They killed something inside me when they let it happened and there is no coming back from that.”_

The journal fell from Miguel’s trembling hands.

_No. No, no, no, no, no. It wasn’t true. It couldn’t be._

Somehow, Robby had known that Miguel was planning on reading his journal and he’d left a fake one full of lies to mess with his head. Miguel knew who he was and he wasn’t that – that abusive monster Robby was writing about.

_It’s all true and you know it. Every single word of it. You blinded yourself, turned away so you wouldn’t have to see what he was going through, and this is what it led to._

They raped Robby. They were raping Robby right in front of him and he had done nothing. He’d blamed him and then hurt him some more. His friends maybe monsters but he was the worst of them all.

With shaking hands, he picked up the journal again and turned to the last entry.

_“Two lines. That’s all it’ll take. Two deep cuts along each wrist. Vertical, not horizontal. Horizontal ones are for pussies looking for attention, but I’m doing this for real. Carmen keeps some painkillers in the cupboard and I know where Rosa hides the weed. I can handle the pain, but there is no reason why it should hurt. I can make it comfortable and everyone says that a bathtub full of water makes it easy. I know when nobody will be home and I’ll finish it before anyone knows.”_

_“But I won’t go out like a loser. Winning the tournament would be the last thing I do. I won’t let people say that I just couldn’t hack it. That I was too pussy to handle the shit – that all the crap they did to me got to me. I’ll win and then I’ll do it. That’ll show everyone that this was my choice. And for once, I get to choose something.”_

_“Maybe they’ll feel guilty – but they’ll get over it. Dad and Miguel hate me now anyway and I don’t think they’d have cared had I done it years ago. I know Mr. LaRusso cares. He really does. But he has his own family, his own kids and I don’t matter that much to him. In a few months it’d be like I never existed.”_

_“That sounds really good right now. Never having existed at all.”_

Instinctively, Miguel tore out the last page as if by removing it, he could erase what it said. He felt his stomach churn and barely made it to the bathroom before emptying his morning breakfast into the toilet.

_I have to tell someone,_ he thought as he rinsed his mouth. _I have to let someone know. I have to find a way to stop him. To save him._

But did he really have the right? After everything he’d done to Robby, exposing his secrets like this would just push him over the edge, wouldn’t it?

And what if Robby wasn’t serious? Yes, Miguel believed what was written now, but what if Robby was just venting? Purging these thoughts on paper so they wouldn’t plague his head anymore?

He’d figure it out later, Miguel decided. Right now, the only thing to do was to make sure that Robby didn’t win the tournament. He wanted to go out a winner, right? Well, if Miguel didn’t let him then he wouldn’t do it and that would buy Miguel some time to figure out how to handle it.

Yes, this could work. The more he thought about it, the more certain he got. No matter what, Robby could not be allowed to win the tournament today.


	19. Miguel X

Robby was going to win, Miguel thought despairing. He’d demolished one opponent after another with a calm composure and he had made it to the semi-finals against Hawk. And he’d already beaten Hawk before twice while outnumbered.

“You have to win this one.” Miguel told Hawk somehow keeping his composure. What he really wanted to do was grab him by his stupid mohawk and bang his head against the floor, but this wasn’t the time for that.

“Don’t worry. I’ve been training like a maniac.” Hawk said, deadly serious. “I’m not losing to him this time.”

Hawk still wasn’t taking Robby seriously enough.

“Listen, you don’t understand.” Miguel hissed at him. “You have to win this at _any_ cost. Even if it means playing dirty.”

Hawk looked at him, taken aback. “I’m not gonna fight dirty.” He said. “Sensei would kill me.”

No, fighting dirty wouldn’t work anyway. Hawk would just get himself disqualified.

“Get in his head.” Miguel advised. “Make him lose his cool and make him fight dirty. Get him disqualified.”

Hawk considered the plan and then smiled in approval. This could work.

This wasn’t working. Robby had two points to Hawk’s zero and it looked like the next round would finish it. Hawk was the one losing his cool and getting desperate while Robby stayed calm and focused. If – when – Hawk lost the next point, it’d be up to Miguel and he wasn’t sure he had it in him to hurt Robby. Not any more than he already had.

They were getting ready for the third round and Miguel prayed for a miracle. Hawk said something to Robby that Miguel couldn’t hear and Robby said something back. Robby turned to go back to his corner and Miguel saw Hawk’s face contort in rage before he rushed forward and kicked Robby in the back.

The crowd booed and Johnny rushed forward to check on him and Miguel wanted to scream his head off. The idiot just got himself disqualified and Robby earned a trip to the finals against Miguel.

Kneeling and trying to get up, Miguel was feeling desperate now. And scared. He had been close – so close to finishing it clean.

There had been a ray of hope before the match started when someone had mentioned that Robby was too hurt to continue. A victory by default would’ve normally tasted like ashes in his mouth, but today, Miguel would’ve reveled in it. He’d have swallowed a mouthful and asked for seconds.

But Robby had shown up anyway- that stubborn, pig-headed ASSHOLE.

He was holding one arm a little awkwardly and Miguel knew that Hawk had really hurt his shoulder with that kick. But at the time, Miguel had decided to fight clean. He didn’t want to give Robby any excuse to pretend that he could’ve won.

He had been so close too – leading with two points to one and about to land a finishing blow. But then that two-legged kick had come out of nowhere. Where the hell did Robby even learn something like that?

He had no choice now, he thought as Robby walked over to him and offered him a hand up. Robby was being a good guy and now Miguel was forced to be a villain.

_This is for your own good,_ Miguel thought, as he grabbed his bad arm instead and yanked it down.

“You noticed right? His shoulder is his weak spot.” Hawk whispered to him when he was back in his corner, trying to ignore the boos. “I set him up for you.”

But Johnny looked anything but happy.

“Look, I know you want to win this for us. For Cobra Kai.” He told Miguel. “But you need to do this right. You don’t need to fight dirty.”

_For Cobra Kai? I don’t give a shit about Cobra Kai._ Miguel thought angrily. _I’m doing this for Robby. To save his life._

Johnny was so obsessed with his reputation and his dojo and his dojo’s reputation that he didn’t even see what it was doing to his son. Miguel could hardly blame him. He’d been the same until that morning. But he’d fix this – figure it out later. Right now, Robby was the priority and there was no level he wouldn’t stoop to for his sake.

“There is nothing dirty about winning, Sensei!” He replied. “You taught me that.”

He hated himself for it. Hated the look of hurt and pain on Robby’s face when he went after the shoulder. Hated how heartbroken Robby looked for a moment as he fell back on the mat – before the familiar mask was back and he got up and bowed respectfully.

This was not the victory he’d wanted. It felt nothing like how he’d imagined his first tournament win – even though everything was happening just how he’d hoped it would. But saving Robby was the real prize here and he wasn’t sure he had done that yet.

* * *

No one was in a mood for celebration. Robby had gone off with Mr. LaRusso after the tournament but he had come back for Miguel’s “victory” dinner. Not that it was much of a victory.

Ofcourse, Carmen was still trying to cheer them all up. 

“You did really well, Robby.” She said, smiling at him. “And you’ve just been training for one year. Not even that. I didn’t even know that you’d hurt your shoulder.”

“Thanks.” Robby replied morosely, pushing his food in his plate with one hand while the other hung in a sling.

“I’m sure Miguel didn’t notice either.” She continued. “He’d have been more careful about your arm had he known.”

“No, I knew.” Miguel told her and got baleful looks in return.

“Well, I’m sure these things happen in tournament.” Carmen kept trying to keep the peace. “But it’s over now, right? Johnny?”

Johnny was startled out of his thoughts at the sound of his name. He clearly hadn’t heard anything and he hadn’t said much during the dinner either.

_Why aren’t you pissed off at me?_ Miguel thought, not having the courage to look him in the eye. _For years you taught me about fighting honorably and I just shit all over it. Why aren’t you yelling at me? Grounding me? Kicking me out of Cobra Kai?_

Could Robby be right? Did Johnny really not care about him? When Robby crossed a line, Johnny had no problem laying down the law. Why wasn’t he doing the same with Miguel?

Johnny couldn’t actually be okay with it, right? With the way Miguel had won just because he was angry with Robby? Because if that was the case, then…

“Yeah.” Johnny nodded absentmindedly. “That shouldn’t have happened.”

Carmen shook her head, exasperated. “Well, I’m glad we won anyway.”

“I didn’t win.” Robby pointed out.

“Hey! You came in second in your very first tournament. Just like Miguel last year.” She reminded them. “And this house got both the first and the second prize. As far as I’m concerned, that makes you both winners.”

_No, don’t say that to him._ Miguel thought as a chill went down his spine. _You don’t know what he’ll do if he thinks he has won._

“It doesn’t.” He insisted loudly before turning to Robby. “Second place is for losers. You lost to me and that makes you a loser. And you’ll stay a loser until you beat me.”

“Miguel!” Carmen said sharply, but Robby just got up and excused himself from the table.

“You need to apologize to him. Right now!” Carmen said after he was gone.

“I won’t. And you can’t make me.” Miguel said firmly. They didn’t know why he was doing this, why he had to do this. And he couldn’t tell them without figuring it out a little more – but until then, he wasn’t budging an inch.

“Let it go.” Johnny said sadly. “Just let it go for now.”

Robby didn’t talk to him at all that night and Miguel was done touching him without his permission. But he could still talk to him.

“You were good today, okay?” Miguel admitted grudgingly. “Better than I expected. Maybe you’ll even win next year. If you keep working at it. Because I’m not gonna slack off. I’m gonna beat you in the finals every single time and the only way you won’t be a loser would be if you beat me.”

There, that should tide them over for a few days, right? If he was lucky, maybe even a year. It’d light a fire under Robby about winning next time and he won’t do anything stupid until then. And Miguel would find some way to talk to Johnny in the meantime – maybe tomorrow after dojo – and they’d figure out how to make Robby feel better going forward.

* * *

He was uncertain about leaving Robby at home that day.

_You are being stupid,_ He told himself. Carmen was going to leave after them and she’d offered to drop Robby off at LaRussos before going to work and Robby had accepted. Miguel had handled things last night and there would be someone watching over Robby all day long, even if they didn’t know they were doing it. Nothing was going to happen today, not while he ran errands with Johnny before heading off to the dojo.

And he’d talk to Johnny later – at their special burger place. ( _Robby has never been there with us before. How is that possible?_ ) Miguel would tell him everything and they’d figure something out.

“You wanna talk?” Johnny asked quietly as they sat in the car and Miguel asked him about it. “Does that mean you’ll actually listen or just do what you want anyway?”

He deserved that. He deserved worse, regardless of his reasons. But that wasn’t important right now.

“I had to win.” Miguel replied, just as softly.

“Not like that.” Johnny said. “You know, I was proud of you when you came in second last year. Yeah, I was pissed at LaRusso for pulling that shit, but I was proud of _you_. I’m not this time, even though you won. I’m more proud of the way Robby fought, even though he was fighting for LaRusso.”

“Then tell him that.” Miguel said angrily. _Why haven’t you told him that before?_

“I will.” Johnny nodded. “When he is ready to hear it.”

_Are you kidding me? Ready for it? He’s desperate for it. That’s something he has wanted his whole life._

“I want to talk to you about Robby, okay?” Miguel said. “I fought dirty because of him.”

Johnny nodded. “I figured.”

That surprised him. Did Johnny know already?

“Look, you shouldn’t be angry at him.” Johnny explained. “I know I’m still angry that he fought for Miyagi-Do, but that’s between me and him. There is no reason for you kids to get involved in that. I know I ended up encouraging you – but I’m putting a stop to that nonsense right now.”

_No, it’s already too late for that. The damage is already done._

“I know you thought that we would get him back if you won, but things don’t work like that.” Johnny continued. “Win or lose, people will do what they want to anyway.”

The words made Miguel’s blood freeze. _People will do what they want and what Robby wanted was to die._

_No, he wants to go out a winner. He won’t…_

_You willing to bet his life on that?_

“I need to go home.” Miguel said, breathlessly. “I need to go back and… and apologize to Robby. Right now!”

Johnny smiled at his, a flicker of pride in his eyes. “You can do that after the class.”

“No! I need to do it right now.” Miguel felt close to panicking.

Johnny frowned and Miguel felt ashamed for a second. He was being stupid. Robby had already left with Carmen and he was probably at Mr. LaRusso’s right now. The house would be empty.

“Screw it! I’ll walk.” He said, opening the door.

“Hey! Alright.” Johnny looked at him confused. “I’ll take you home. To apologize to Robby, right?”

Miguel nodded and Johnny started the car again.

_I’m being stupid. I’m being stupid. I’m being stupid._

He told himself that a thousand times. Robby had already gone to Mr. LaRusso’s and ofcourse he hadn’t answered his text because he was still pissed at him. He was going to rush into an empty house and Johnny was going to be annoyed at him for making him run around for no reason. All of this drama was for nothing.

But he still couldn’t get rid of that pit in his stomach, no matter how many times he repeated that to himself. And his heart felt like it was about to pound out of his chest. He felt cold sweat tricking down the back of his neck. The last page of Robby’s journal – the one he had torn out and folded and put in his wallet – was now burning a hole through his pocket. And had this car always been so goddamn slow? Yaya drove faster than dad.

He jumped out of the car as they pulled into the driveway before it’d come to a complete stop. He rushed inside the house, ignoring Johnny’s angry shout telling him to wait and went straight to the room he shared with Robby.

_Empty. Thank God._ Miguel sighed in relief. Ofcourse he was being stupid. Robby was at Mr. LaRusso’s, training his ass off for next year and…

_No – he said he was going to do it in the bathtub._

He wheeled around, just as Johnny came up behind him with a concerned look on his face. But Miguel ignored him and ran towards the closed bathroom door instead.

_Locked? There is no reason why it should be locked._

Without preamble, he kicked the door in and then froze where he stood.

_I’m too late._

“ROBBY!” Johnny yelled, pushing Miguel aside and rushing inside.

_We are both too late._

“Hey, hey, hey! You’re okay. No, no, no, no – you are okay. You are gonna be fine.” Johnny said ,slapping his cheek. “Wake up, alright. Just wake up.”

_He won’t. He can’t. He’s not okay. Can’t you see that?_

The water was already deep crimson and Robby looked pale as a ghost against it. There was no color anywhere on his body except for the red gashes on his forearms. Johnny fumbled with the towel, wrapping them around his wrists to staunch the flow of blood, even though it looked like it’d stopped already. And it didn’t look like he was breathing.

“Miguel! Call 9-1-1.” Johnny yelled, trying to pull Robby out of the tub. He slipped and fell into the blood red water but got right back up again.

“You’ll be okay! You’ll be fine!” He kept saying as he pulled Robby out. “MIGUEL!”

Miguel fumbled with his phone and dialed the number. _It’s no use. He’s already gone._

“9-1-1.What’s your emergency?” A voice said from the other end.

_No emergency,_ he thought numbly. _I just lost my Robby for good._


	20. Miguel XI

“It was touch and go for a moment. But he’ll be okay.”

Miguel slumped back in his chair and started sobbing at those words.

He’d been surprised at how calm he’d been through it all. But now he knew that he hadn’t been calm at all – he’d just been numb. From the moment he’d kicked in the door, his mind had frozen in place, unable to think or do anything other than focus on the idea of having lost Robby. But it all caught up to him in a single instant and overwhelmed him. He barely felt his grandmother trying to comfort him. 

“We are keeping him sedated for now. In a medically induced coma.” The doctor continued. “He has lost a lot of blood and we don’t want to wake him up until his vitals stabilize. It could take a few days, but it’s better than putting any stress on him – physical or emotional.”

Johnny nodded numbly, looking at the floor and quietly accepting everything the doctor was saying. 

“Dr. Carmichael will be talking to you in a bit.” He went on. “He’s our hospital psychiatrist. We’ll try to figure out what happened.”

“A shrink?” Johnny looked up. “My son’s not crazy.”

Miguel glared at him through blurry eyes.  _ This isn’t the time for your retro, macho bullshit, okay? _

“I’m sorry – it’s necessary in cases like this.” The doctor said gently. “He’ll need to go on suicide watch and we can’t release him until we can be certain that he isn’t a danger to himself. It’s the law, Mr. Lawrence.”

“Honey…” Carmen started to say, but Johnny cut her off.

“Yeah, I get it.” He said, nodding again. 

Dr. Carmichael looked every bit a shrink should. Nondescript and non-threatening – old, a little stooped and overweight with a head full of greying hair. But with sharp, penetrating eyes that seemed to see right through Miguel and discern all his lies and crimes. 

Or maybe he was just projecting. What the hell did he know about what a shrink was supposed to look like?

“I’m sorry for what happened, Mr….” The doctor consulted his clipboard. “Keene, is it?”

“Lawrence.” Johnny corrected. “Robby has his mother’s name.”

“Okay.” Carmichael said, looking over at Carmen and trying to see the resemblance. 

“She’s not here.” Johnny added. Shannon had gotten out of rehab for what felt like the hundredth time a few months back and she’d only talked to Robby once after that. 

“I see.” The doctor said and Miguel thought he heard a hint of judgment in his voice. “Well, let’s get to it then. Robby took an extreme step and something must have gone really wrong to push him that far. Our job now is to figure out what drove him to it and how to fix it.”

“I already know the answer to that.” Johnny told him quietly. “It was me. I pushed him to it.”

Carmichael looked at him sympathetically. “I know your first instinct would be to blame yourself, but the truth is more important and he-”

“It’s the truth.” Johnny insisted. “We were fighting. We have been fighting for months. I did something that I thought I was doing for his own good, but he hated me for it. He was trying to punish me and I was angry at him about that. He played his last card yesterday and it didn’t work.”

“I’m afraid I’m gonna need more details.” The doctor said, taking notes. 

“I run a karate dojo, okay?” Johnny sighed. “And Robby joined this other dojo run by this guy I don’t like to get back at me. He figured if he beat my students in the tournament yesterday, he’d have his revenge. But he lost and… and I guess he couldn’t handle that.”

_ No, you still don’t get it.  _ Miguel thought.  _ Don’t you remember what you told me? Winning or losing doesn’t matter.  _

“So you believe that Robby wouldn’t have done this had he won?” Carmichael gave Johnny a piercing look. 

“Yeah.” Johnny nodded. “If I’d just let him have his revenge, he’d be satisfied and it’d be over.”

“That’s not true.” Miguel cut in. “Robby wasn’t trying to get back at you. Not any more.”

Johnny frowned at him and then his face went blank. Miguel knew what was going through his head. He’d known what Robby was going to do and he’d rushed them back home for that very reason. It was so obvious in retrospect – and Johnny simply hadn’t thought about it. But he was thinking about it now. 

“Do you know something about this?” He asked, his eyes clearing up.

He had to tell them now. He should’ve told them a lot sooner. If he’d just told them yesterday instead of getting caught up in his own insane, childing plots, maybe things wouldn’t have come to this. 

Slowly he took out the folded page from his wallet and handed it to Johnny. Johnny gave him a questioning look before unfolding and reading it. Carmen read it too, over his shoulder and he could see them both getting angry as they finished. 

“What the hell is this?” Johnny asked. 

“It’s from his journal. I read it yesterday.” Miguel replied, nervously. 

“You knew he was going to do this? You knew he was thinking about this and you didn’t tell us?” Johnny was barely keeping his anger in control. “Why?”

“I didn’t know how.” Miguel cried. “I didn’t know if he was being serious or just venting. I didn’t know if… I didn’t know anything… I…”

“Is this why he couldn’t win?” Carmen asked. “Why you called him a loser?”

Miguel nodded shamefully. Seemed so stupid in hindsight. Robby was driven to that point because everyone kept hurting him. How was hurting him more by calling him a loser supposed to get him to live?

“May I see that?” Dr. Carmichael asked with an outstretched hand and Johnny gave him the paper. 

“Miguel, it’s okay.” Johnny said, still frowning. “I don’t blame you for this.”

_ You should. You should blame me. And then blame yourself for not blaming me before. If you’d said something or done something… _

“I see.” The doctor nodded. “Well, I believe it’s clear now that Robby’s issues go deeper than the fight you were having, correct?”

Johnny nodded in agreement. “I’ll figure it out.” He said. “I’ll find a way to make him feel better. He doesn’t need a shrink.” __

_ Is he serious?  _ Miguel thought.  _ Is he ashamed of Robby? Is that it? He doesn’t want to air his dirty laundry in public? _

“Mr. Lawrence, I know there is a stigma attached to this idea of psychiatry - ” Carmichael tried explaining, but Johnny cut him off. 

“It’s not that, okay? Yes, I’m ashamed of making Robby feel like that, but that’s not what this is about.” He explained. “It’s still all my fault. I made him feel like that. I didn’t pay enough attention to him. I screwed up so it’s up to me to make it right.”

“Alright.” Dr. Carmichael said, nodding and clicking his pen close. “Let me be blunt then. I’m not here to handhold you or make you feel better about yourself. Robby is my patient and his well-being is my priority. He needs help, serious help and frankly, I don’t think you are up to the task of giving it to him. Not if he ended up here under your supervision. My job is to make sure he gets the help he needs and I’m doing it one way or the other. And if you get in my way, we can get social services involved.”

“Johnny, he is right.” Carmen added softly. “It doesn’t matter who makes things right as long as they are made right.”

Johnny always did respond better to straight talk. Waffling around with words just made him more stubborn – but lay down the facts clearly and he was capable of getting it. 

“You are right.” He nodded. “Whatever you need to do…”

* * *

Carmen stayed behind that night. Once the visiting hours were over, the nurses told them that only one person could stay behind and Carmen said she had an early shift next morning anyway. 

None of them wanted to leave Robby’s side, but he’d be unconscious and the doctor assured them that they wouldn’t wake him up unless they were all there. And Miguel didn’t want his mother to come back with the house like that – with the broken bathroom door and the bathtub full of blood. 

He almost threw up when they came back. His mind flashed back to that moment – Johnny dragging Robby outside, trying to keep the pressure on his hands. Robby’s translucent and bloody shirt clinging to him – Miguel felt dizzy remembering that. The least they could do now is wipe clean the physical evidence of that incident. 

But Johnny went straight to their room when they got back and Miguel followed him. He was already rummaging through Robby’s desk when Miguel got in. 

“What are you doing?” He asked. 

“Looking for his journal.” Johnny said, opening the drawer. “Got it!”

“No!” Miguel moved forward on instinct and snatched it from his hand. “No, you can’t read that.”

“You did!” Johnny replied, frowning.

“Well, I wish I hadn’t.” What the hell was he saying? They’d never have known what Robby was about to do if he hadn’t read it. They wouldn’t have rushed back and then Robby would’ve really been dead by the time they got back. “I mean, I’m glad I read it, but it was still wrong. I did it for the wrong reasons – to find something to hurt him.”

“Well, I’m not.” Johnny said, stepping forward. “I just want to know what’s going on with him.”

“Then ASK him.” Miguel yelled, holding the journal behind his back. “He’d tell you if you just ask.”

“I tried. You know he doesn’t want to talk to me.” Johnny spread his hands. 

“So keep asking. Keep trying.” Miguel insisted. “That’s what he really wanted. For you not to give up.”

Johnny looked guilty and Miguel knew he was on to something. 

“What’s in there?” Johnny’s face changed. “What are you hiding?”

Miguel hadn’t even thought about that. The only thing going through his head right then was protecting Robby’s privacy. There were things in there that Robby didn’t want Johnny or Miguel to know and while Miguel couldn’t help knowing himself, he could at least stop Johnny from finding out. 

But if Johnny read it – he’d hate Miguel, right? And he should. Miguel had done horrible things to Robby and allowed even worse things to happen to him. No way Johnny would ever forgive him for that. Maybe he was being selfish – trying to protect himself…

No, he wasn’t going to do that. If Robby told Johnny the truth when he woke up or said it was okay for him to read the journal, Miguel wouldn’t stand in the way. He’d watch this relationship crumble because that would be what he deserved. But it had to be Robby’s choice. 

“Is there something about you in there?” Johnny asked, suspiciously. 

“Loads.” Miguel replied. “And all of it is bad. But that’s not what this is about, okay? Robby wouldn’t want you reading this.”

“That doesn’t matter anymore.”

“Yes. It does. What Robby wants matters!” Miguel shouted. “You can’t just keep walking all over him and say it's for his own good. It doesn’t work that way. You have to start thinking about what he wants, okay?”

“I don’t…” Johnny started, but then closed his eyes. “I just need some direction. I need to do something, alright.” He sat back on Robby’s bed, exhausted. 

Miguel nodded and sat beside him, still keeping the journal away. 

_ Do something.  _ He understood that sentiment. They were pretty much useless right now as far as Robby’s recovery was concerned. And that feeling of helplessness was the worst thing in the world. They needed to do something, change something. If nothing was different when Robby woke up, then how could they expect him to feel any different?

“I bullied Robby.” Miguel confessed. “At home, when no one was around. And others did the same thing at school.”

“Why would you do that?” Johnny asked, tonelessly. 

“I thought it was just harmless fun. Guys messing around.” Miguel replied. “I didn’t know how much it was hurting him. And he didn’t say anything to you because… because he thought you’d take my side. That you’d just tell him not to be a pussy.”

Johnny nodded, absorbing it. 

“That wasn’t all.” Miguel added. “I mean, I knew we went too far sometimes. But I thought that would just make him tougher. I figured the day he’d had enough, he’d go to you and ask you to teach him karate so he can stand up for himself. That’s how things started between us, right? I was being bullied and you taught me to stand up for myself. I thought he could come to you for the same reason.”

“I thought the same thing.” Johnny admitted. “He kept telling me that he hated my students and I knew what that meant, but I kept hoping that it’d finally push him to learn.”

“I’m sorry.” Miguel said. “I should’ve been looking out for him.”

Johnny gave him a half-hearted laugh. “You were doing what I taught you to do.” He said. “And what you thought I wanted. So were the others.”

Miguel shook his head. “No dad. They – we – went too far.” He said. “We got carried away. Trust me. And if you really want to do something, this is what you can do. Deal with them.”

Johnny nodded. “Was the whole class going after him?”

Miguel thought about. It wasn’t ALL of them. Most kids at the dojo didn’t particularly care about this stuff. They had their own lives and this was just karate for them. But a few were a lot more fanatic than others. Starting with Hawk. Miguel had never thought of himself as a snitch, but he didn’t feel an ounce of guilt now as he listed off their names. 

“I always thought they were good kids.” Johnny said, dejected.

“They usually were. Just not to Robby.”

“We’ll start with punishments.” Johnny said, nodding to himself. “Start by demoting them to white-belts and make them-”

“No, that’s not good enough.” Miguel interjected. “You need to get rid of them.”

Johnny looked at him, surprised and considering.

“Miguel, you don’t understand. This is on me, okay?” Johnny explained. “I allowed this to happen. I taught them that shit. It wouldn’t be fair to make them pay for my mistakes.”

Miguel got it. He really did – because he felt exactly the same way. He’d started that shit, brought Hawk into it, let him think that it was okay and then not done enough to stop it when others had run with it. But this was not about making themselves feel better by punishing themselves, it was about what would make Robby feel better. 

“Fair doesn’t matter, alright?” Miguel told him. “We made Robby feel like nobody cared about him and we need to show him that’s not true. If that means not caring about others then… then that’s what we gotta do. You need to kick them out of the dojo. For good.”

“Does that include you?”

Miguel hadn’t thought about that. Kicked out of Cobra Kai? When he had been there since the very beginning? Before anybody else? When it had been such a huge part of his life? He should be panicking at the very prospect of it. Trying to think of some rationalization why he should be the sole exception. 

Except, it felt like he didn’t care anymore. Like he’d gladly burn the dojo down just to see Robby smile again. 

“Yes.” Miguel nodded. “For a start.”

That wasn’t enough for him, was it? Others would feel the sting because they still cared about Cobra Kai – and Miguel didn’t. Not anymore. 

“I think you need to talk to Mr. LaRusso too.” Miguel added, ashamed at not having thought of it before. 

Johnny still hesitated, uncertain. 

“He wasn’t trying to get back at you anymore. Neither of them was.” Miguel added quickly. “Robby really cares about Mr. LaRusso and Mr. LaRusso made him feel better about himself. Robby’s gonna need him too.”

Johnny nodded for the last time. 

* * *

It wasn’t a class, per-se. No way they’d just go back to holding Cobra Kai classes like things were normal. Not while Robby was still in the hospital. But they all got tired of the unrelenting calls and Johnny was just taking care of some stuff – telling the students that Robby was in the hospital and that there won’t be any more classes for a while now. 

Or maybe not ever. They’d have to wait and see how Robby felt about it when he woke up. He’d never tell them to quit, Miguel knew that much. Robby wasn’t that vindictive – but they’d figure out a way to gauge it anyway. 

And Miguel found himself too pussy to face his punishment after all. He knew he deserved this – to stand in front of the others, to be scolded by Johnny before being told to leave and never come back. But in the end, he found out that he couldn’t face the humiliation. He simply couldn’t go in there. T hankfully, Johnny didn’t make him.

Miguel waited on the curb, watching students go in, still smiling and happy about their meaningless victory from two days ago and did his best to hide from them. He wondered what Johnny would tell them. If he’d tell them what Robby actually did and why. He wouldn't, right? It was none of their business and Miguel wasn’t sure Robby would want this known around school.

And would Hawk and others tell Johnny what they did? And what if they did it? Johnny could storm out of the doors any moment, making a beeline for Miguel and beating him up once he found out the truth. 

That didn’t happen though. About twenty minutes after the class started, students poured out of the doors, all looking shaken and disturbed. And angry. Miguel wasn’t able to hide this time and some of them came up to him to talk, while others maintained a respectful distance.

“It’s true, right?” Aisha whispered. “That Robby tried to… kill himself? I heard it this morning from the LaRussos.”

That was unexpected. Johnny had only called Mr. LaRusso that morning and he’d come over with his wife right away. 

_ Maybe dad’s wrong about LaRusso,  _ that’s what Miguel had thought that morning. They’d heard the stories for years – about this judgmental, hypocritical asshole who stole other guys’ girlfriends and trophies. And the way he had opposed Cobra Kai all these years had proven that to Miguel. 

But the asshole from the stories wouldn’t have passed up on this opportunity. He’d have been condescending and snide – told them that they brought it upon themselves with the shitty way they treated Robby, that Cobra Kai was the reason for this and if Johnny cared about his son at all, he’d quit karate altogether.

“I’m sorry Johnny. I didn’t know things were this bad.” That was the only thing Daniel said. “I knew he wasn’t happy, but I thought he was dealing with it. That he was getting better.”

_ He was,  _ Miguel thought. This wasn’t on LaRusso. Atleast he had actually helped, made things a little better. They were the ones who’d damaged Robby beyond repair. But LaRusso didn’t shove that in their faces, which meant he wasn’t that bad, right?

But if he was already spreading stories about Robby…

“It wasn’t like that.” Aisha clarified. “I was there to pick Sam up when Mr. LaRusso got the call. I guess that was from Sensei? I’ve known Mr. LaRusso since I was three and I’ve never seen him look like that.”

Miguel nodded in acknowledgement. So the news was already out and there was no putting that genie in the bottle. He could ask them all to keep it a secret, but these people didn’t know Robby or care about him. To them, this was just juicy gossip. Besides, some of them were already on their phones, texting furiously and Miguel knew that that was about. 

But all of this was expected and he knew they could handle it. 

He wasn’t expecting  _ that _ though.

“That pussy tries to kill himself and I’m the one who gets punished for it?” Hawk said angrily. “How is that fair?”

They were in a crowd and their backs were turned to each-other. Miguel hadn’t even realized that Hawk was there and it was probably the same for Hawk. Those words clearly weren’t meant for his ears. 

But that didn’t matter. Miguel turned around with his heart pounding anyway. 

“What the fuck did you just say?” He hissed, making Hawk jump and turn around. 

He had the courtesy to look ashamed, atleast. But that wasn’t good enough for Miguel. Not now and not after everything. 

“Sorry. Didn’t know you were there.” Hawk said, looking at the ground. “I didn’t mean it like that.”

“So how did you mean it?” Miguel snarled back. 

His brow furrowed in annoyance. “Look, I know you care about him and all, but that loser had it coming to him. If he can’t take it, then he shouldn’t have taken part in the first place. That’s on him, not me.”

Hawk probably never expected Miguel to hit him for real. Sure they sparred and wrestled, but they both always held back. They’d been best friends for years after all and Miguel had always thought of him as more of his brother than he ever did Robby. 

That was probably why Hawk couldn’t block the punch that Miguel threw at him. And why he was too shocked to put up much of a defense after. Even when he was on the ground and Miguel was pounding on him, he seemed too stunned to react. 

“You. Stay. The fuck. Away. From. Him.” Miguel said, punctuating each word with a punch. 

Someone grabbed him and pulled him off and Miguel swung his elbow back blindly, catching their face and getting free. Hawk slithered backwards, raising his arms in defense and Miguel was back on him, raining down his fists, not caring whether they found their mark or not.

_ What am I doing? I used to love Hawk and hate Robby. Now I’m beating up my best friend for Robby’s sake? How did it come to this? _

“Miguel! Enough!” Johnny’s voice cut through the haze of rage surrounding him. It didn’t stop him though and he kept going until Johnny pulled him off and held him in place until he calmed down. 

Johnny spared Hawk the barest of glances. 

“Get him cleaned up.” He said to no one in particular, but some of the guys stepped forward to help Hawk up anyway. “Let’s go, Miguel. We need to get back to the hospital.”

* * *

He didn’t expect to see Hawk so soon. Maybe not ever, but certainly not the very next day. 

Miguel just needed to get some air. Watching Robby like that, pale and small and vulnerable on the hospital bed felt like torture. If not for the incessant beeping from the machines, he might’ve thought him dead and the thought still made Miguel’s stomach drop. And just sitting there and waiting was making him feel like crawling up the walls. So he stepped out to get some air and saw Hawk in the ambulance bay. 

Or rather, Hawk saw him. Miguel didn’t recognize him at first, what with his signature Mohawk covered with a hoodie. And the face covered with bruises didn’t help. But he did recognize him as the figure drew closer. 

“I don’t want to fight, okay?” Hawk said, immediately. “Though if you are gonna kick my ass, guess the hospital’s the right place to do it.”

Miguel couldn’t help but smile at the joke and shifted on the bench to let Hawk sit down next to him. Things would never be the same between them again, but the years of friendship had to count for something. 

“You here to see Robby?” Miguel asked. “He’s not awake yet.”

_ And he wouldn’t want to see you even if he was,  _ He mentally added. __

“I came to see you.” Hawk replied. “To apologize.”

_ I’m not the one you should be apologizing to,  _ Miguel thought, but refrained from saying anything. That had been one of the Cobra-Kai teachings Hawk had taken to heart from the start, though Miguel wasn’t sure he actually understood it. 

Johnny had taught them to have conviction in their own actions, to commit to things. He’d taught them that self-doubt made them weak and uncertain. They should either go all-in or fold like a pussy – no half-measures. And to Hawk, that had meant never questioning what he did, never second-guessing himself and most importantly, never apologizing for anything. 

So the fact that he was apologizing for  _ something  _ meant a lot in itself.  _ Baby steps, right? _

“Okay.” Miguel nodded, waiting for the actual apology. 

“I shouldn’t have said that crap. I’m sorry.” Hawk said. “You know me. I let my mouth run and say shit I don’t mean.”

_ Doesn’t make it hurt any less,  _ Miguel thought.  _ Words matter. What you say matters. They can do real damage and you can’t just walk them back saying you didn’t mean it.  _

“And…?” Miguel prompted.

“And… I’ll do better in future?” Hawk said, uncertainly. “I’ll watch my mouth, I promise.”

Miguel sighed and nodded. Not the best as apologies went and he had a lot more to make up for – they both did – but it was a start atleast. 

“Anything else?” Miguel asked. 

“Yeah.” Hawk looked at him hopefully. “I was hoping you could talk to Sensei. About letting me – us – back in.”

Miguel frowned. Was that all he cared about? Getting back into Cobra Kai? Was he ever really sorry? Didn’t he care about what he did to Robby?

“Look, I know Sensei is pissed at us, but I  _ need _ Cobra Kai, okay?” Hawk pleaded. “It’s the only place I feel like I belong. You remember what I used to be like. Cobra Kai changed my life and I don’t know who I am without it. I’m sure if you talked to Sensei – your dad – he’d let us come back.”

“Why would I do that?” Miguel said, feigning confusion. “I’m the one who told him to kick you guys out.” 

Hawk’s face hardened, that hopeful look gone in an instant. “Bullshit.”

Miguel shrugged. He didn’t care if Hawk actually believed him. 

“Why would you do that?” Hawk asked, hurt by the betrayal.

“Because of what you did to Robby.” Miguel stated flatly.

“I-I didn’t think you’d c-care.” Hawk stammered, sounding like Eli once more. “You had a girlfriend back then and - ”

“You think that’s why I’m mad?” Miguel looked at him in disbelief. “You bullied him. You pushed him around, made him do stuff…”

“No.” Hawk defended. “I was just messing with him a little.”

“Call it what you want.” Miguel snapped. “You hurt him. That’s the truth.”

“I didn’t hurt him.” Hawk said hotly. “He’s a fag. He loved every second of it. He begged for it. He - ”

“Say that word again.” Miguel snarled with his fists clenched. “I dare you.”

He didn’t. He meant it when he said he wasn’t there to fight. 

“You did that stuff with him too.” Hawk said, reproachfully. “Probably a lot more than me. You showed me how, remember. You held him in place while I played with his cock. And then you told him to blow us both.”

Miguel looked down, still ashamed of the memory. He knew he didn’t have the moral high ground here. 

“I know.” He said regretfully. “I’m as bad as you. No, I’m worse.”

“Then why am I the only one getting punished?” Hawk argued. “Why isn’t Sensei kicking you out of Cobra Kai?”

“He did. I’m out too.” Miguel told him. Maybe he should’ve said that sooner?

“No. No way.” Hawk shook his head disbelieving. “Sensei would never do that. Not to you. He loves you more than anything.”

Miguel shrugged and didn’t say anything. Johnny hadn’t officially kicked him out – not like he had with others. He hadn’t even said he would. So technically, Miguel could walk back in any time he wanted. But figuring that out was the furthest thing from his mind. 

“How are you okay with that?” Hawk asked.

“Because I don’t give a shit about Cobra Kai anymore.” Miguel said, matter-of-fact. “All I care about now is Robby getting better and making things right with him.”

Hawk stared at him, open-mouthed and didn’t say anything for a while. 

“Make things right with  _ him _ ?” He asked, shocked. “After all the shit he put you guys through?”

“What?”

“Like betraying you and going over to the enemy.” Hawk clarified. “That’s why he tried to kill himself, right? Because he felt guilty and stupid for treating you like that?”

Miguel shook his head in disbelief.  _ Could Hawk really be that blind? _

_ You are one to talk. You were just as blind until you read how Robby really felt.  _

“He did that because we made his life hell. All of us. Especially me.” Miguel said. “Miyagi-Do was good for him and we couldn’t even let him have that.”

“That’s no excuse for betraying sensei.” Hawk argued. 

Miguel frowned. 

“Is that that how you justify raping him?” He hadn’t wanted to bring that up. That was almost certain to lead to a fight. 

Hawk went beet-red at the word, looking around in panic to see if anyone heard them. 

“We didn’t  _ rape  _ him, okay?” He whispered indignantly. “We were teaching him a lesson. For Sensei.”

“You think my dad wanted that?” Hawk couldn’t be that stupid, could he?

“Yes.” Hawk said immediately. Then he thought about it. “I mean, no. Not exactly.”

Miguel stared at him, waiting for him to go on as Hawk gathered his thoughts. 

“Look, Sensei didn’t give us much room to work with, but we got the message.” He explained. “We weren’t supposed to hurt him physically or pick a fight with him, but he still needed to be punished for hurting Sensei like that. I thought he’d learn his lesson if we just messed with him a little, but he was too stubborn. We had to up our game.”

“So you drugged him and raped him?”

“I told you it wasn’t that.” Hawk insisted. “I just slipped him something to make sure he wouldn’t fight back. He’d have gotten hurt if he had and I didn’t want to hurt him. And we were careful too. Stretched him properly and used rubbers and everything. And he enjoyed it. You saw that, right? He was hard and he came…”

Hawk trailed off as he saw Miguel’s clenched fist again. 

“You’re insane.” Miguel said numbly. How was he ever friends with a guy like that? Was it because he was just as bad?

“Sensei said - ”

“Dad would’ve never wanted this.” Miguel cut him off. 

“He didn’t need to know.” Hawk said, confidently. “He just needed it to be done – didn’t matter how it was done.”

“So that’s it, huh?” Miguel looked at him curiously. “You just do what you _think_ my dad wants and it’s all okay as long as you are doing it for him?”

“Yeah.” Hawk shrugged and it seemed like they were talking past each-other. “What’s wrong with that?”

“What’s wrong is that you don’t do that shit to people.” Miguel almost shouted, hoping this would get through. “No matter what reasons you think you have, no matter who you think wants you to do it, you just don’t do shit like that.”

Hawk blinked. “But you - ”

“I fucked up too, okay.” Miguel said. “But atleast I know how bad I fucked up. You just don’t seem to get it.”

He was trying to – Miguel could see that. He was trying to understand Miguel’s logic here, but for some reason, it seemed like his mind just didn’t work that way. 

“But with Cobra Kai - ” He started. 

“You are not Cobra Kai anymore.” Miguel cut him off again. “And you are not getting back in.”

Hawk looked confused and hurt. And betrayed. Like he barely knew what was happening, much less why it was happening. 

“You are lucky I didn’t tell dad about all the shit you did to Robby.” Miguel tried a different angle. “He’d have killed you instead of just kicking you out.” Then he thought of something else. “You realize that you can go to prison for this, right?”

“For just messing around?” Hawk scoffed. “It was - like - a prank.”

“Dude, do me a favor.” Miguel said. “Go home and look up what consent means. Then look up what rape means and then what date-rape means. And then look up how many years you could get for the crap you pulled.”

Hawk blanched at that.  _ Finally. _

“You are shitting me.” He said, scared. 

“Go look it up.” Miguel shrugged. 

Hawk fidgeted, thinking about it. He was nervous now. Close to panicking. 

“Nobody knows.” He said. “That was months ago and nobody found out about it. It’s over now.”

“Is it?” Miguel wondered. “I don’t think there is a time limit on arresting people for this.”

“Robby didn’t tell anybody before. And he got us back.” Hawk tried again. “He kicked our asses the next day. We are even.”

“You think the cops will see it like that?”

“Then you gotta talk to him.” Hawk pleaded, panicking. “Just ask him not to tell anybody. Threaten him if you have to. _Please_.”

Miguel looked at him sadly. “I won’t do that.” He said. “And you are not getting anywhere near him to do that either.”

“You’d let me go to jail?” He was dumbfounded. “I can take you down with me.”

Miguel smiled and shrugged. “It’s what we deserve. It’s all up to Robby now.”

This was good enough for now, Miguel thought. Maybe Hawk will get it in time – but for now, he’d be spending many a sleepless night wondering when the cops would break down his door. 

“Aren’t you glad that Robby never joined Cobra Kai?” He asked, smirking. “He never learned the lesson about showing no mercy. Think about that when you get home.”

* * *

Miguel was feeling a lot better as he made his way back inside. It felt like he’d finally done something right, made things better for Robby somehow, even if Robby didn’t know it yet. This would make him happy, right? Sure, he’d hate Miguel forever from now on, but this had to make him a little happier. 

He felt a chill when he saw everyone gathered around the doctor. That kind of assembly was usually not a good thing. 

“… likely be dehydrated and disoriented.” The doctor was saying. “So best not to crowd him. Three people at one time at most and preferably family members to begin with. Others can go in later, but make sure to give him plenty of rest in between. And let him have his space if he wants it.”

They were all nodding, agreeing to something and Miguel didn’t know what.

“What’s going on?” He asked after the doctor left. 

“Good. You’re back.” Johnny said, looking at him relieved. “C’mon. They are waking Robby up.”


	21. Robby X

_ Am I dead? Is this what death feels like? _

It didn’t hurt, so that was good. But it wasn’t comfortable either. His whole body felt heavy, like it was sinking and floating at the same time. He felt drowsy like he was waking up after a hundred years. His eyes felt crusty and like they were sealed shut with some kind of glue. His mouth was full of cotton and his throat was made of sandpaper. 

_ This isn’t what death is supposed to feel like, right? So why would I think that? _

Robby opened his eyes with some effort, feeling the sand fall off the edges of his eyelashes. The world came into focus slowly – the white room, the mattress under him, the beeping sound to his right. 

“Hey there, buddy.” Johnny said. “You gave us a real scare.”

Robby looked around, confused. Johnny was to his right, hand gripping his bicep. Miguel to his left, looking too scared to even touch him. And Carmen was by the foot of his bed, softly rubbing his leg from over the blanket. 

_ What’s going on?  _ He wanted to ask, but all that came out was a croak. His throat was too dry. He needed… he needed… 

Carmen was a step ahead of him, handing Johnny a small plastic cup that he brought to him lips. Robby tried to raise his hand to take it from him – he wasn’t a child after all, he could drink water himself – but found himself unable to. He looked down in surprise and found his wrists bandaged up to the elbow. And there were restraints over the bandages, soft and cushy and tying him to the bedside railing. 

“It’s okay.” Johnny reassured him. “Just drink slowly.”

_ What’s going on?  _ He thought again as he took slow sips.  _ Why am I in the hospital? Why am I tied down? And why do my wrists feel like - ? _

_ Oh… Right.  _

Robby groaned and leaned back. The bed was in sitting position already, so he didn’t have to go back down much, but he still closed his eyes so as not to look at them. 

So close. He’d been so close. And he’d felt so relieved in those last few moments. 

The pain had subsided after a while, maybe due to the painkillers kicking in. The chill had gone away, replaced with a comfortable warmth. The darkness had encroached around the corners of his vision. But most importantly, his thoughts had quieted down. It’d almost been like being up on that tree that day with Mr. LaRusso, except even better. Even on that tree his mind hadn’t been completely silent – but in the tub, watching crimson pour out of him – things had gone silent, little by little and all he had felt was relief.

But he had screwed this up too. Maybe he had been too pussy to cut deep enough – so the bleeding had stopped on its own after he lost consciousness. Or maybe he hadn’t taken enough pills. Or maybe he took too many and that made him drowsy and misjudge how deep he should’ve gone. Whatever it was, he’d even screwed this up.

Robby opened his eyes again and found them all still looking at him – smiling a fake smile, trying to look comforting, trying to say something, but too afraid to. 

“Go on, say it.” He could speak now and he said that to nobody in particular. “You know you want to.”

“Say what?” Miguel asked, confused. 

“What kind of loser can’t even kill himself right!” Robby said, not looking at any of them. 

A stunned silence followed that comment. Robby felt more than saw their uncertain smiles disappear. Johnny’s hand tightened around his arm until it was almost gripping him painfully. And barely glancing up, Robby saw Carmen biting her lip. 

“Why would you say that? Why would you even think that?” Miguel said, his voice breaking. “No one’s gonna say that to you. Ever. No one thinks…” He broke down completely. 

Robby stared at him, more curious than annoyed. Miguel was trying to stem the flow but his shoulders were still shaking. What was with that reaction? They hated him, right? He had destroyed any goodwill he could’ve hoped for by the end. Miguel hadn’t even talked to him for days except to hurl insults at him and Johnny had barely even done that. 

Sure he hadn’t expected them to dance with joy. He’d even hoped for them to be upset. And maybe even a little guilty. But not this. This reaction was… he didn’t know what to make of it.

“What’s happening here?” He asked confused. 

“What’s happening is that you scared the living crap out of us.” Johnny said, somehow angry and scared and desperate in the same breath. “Don’t you ever pull something like that again, you got it? You gotta be tougher than that.”

_ Or what? You’ll kill me?  _ Robby frowned at him. 

“Don’t! Don’t say that to him!” Miguel yelled through tears. Robby felt his arm across his chest, almost like it was protectively guarding him from something. “He’s plenty tough already. He’s good just as he is. He doesn’t need to be different and you can’t make him feel like that.” 

“I didn’t mean - ”

“I don’t care.” Miguel snapped. “Just don’t talk to him like that.”

“Sorry.” Johnny said to Robby, looking guilty.

Robby nodded numbly, trying to make heads or tails of this interaction. Miguel got pissed at Johnny for him? That  **_never_ ** happened. They were a team, the two of them. Always in sync, always on the same page – always having each-other’s backs. Robby was the third wheel – the one that never fit in. They turned on him because of each-other, they didn’t turn on each-other because of him. 

“I need to talk to…” Robby started, but trailed off. 

He needed to talk to Mr. LaRusso. He felt like he was going insane and Mr. LaRusso always had a way of getting things to make sense. He could help Robby sort things out. 

But he couldn’t ask for him, could he? This whole mess had started because he’d gone to Mr. LaRusso and whatever was happening here, he wasn’t sure he could afford to make that mistake again. 

“LaRusso, right?” Johnny said. “Yeah, in a bit. We just want to make sure you are okay first.”

Robby looked at him and blinked. What did he mean by “in a bit”?

“He’s outside.” Johnny told him. 

“Mr. LaRusso is here?” Robby asked, his eyebrows coming together. 

“Yeah. I called him.” Johnny nodded. “You need him here right?”

_ Yes. But since when did that matter? Don’t you hate him? _

Maybe he was dead after all. Maybe this was how afterlife worked. 

In those last moments as everything had gone dark, he’d been sure that there was no heaven or hell. And he’d found comfort in that. It was existence itself that he was tired of and the notion of not existing had sounded better than any esoteric paradise. But now he was uncertain all of a sudden. 

His dad actually calling Mr. LaRusso and being okay with them talking? All because Robby needed to? That couldn’t possibly be real. 

So maybe this was how it worked. When you died, you woke up in an alternate universe where things were completely different – more like how you’d want them to be. And then you had to continue living there until you died and went to some other universe. 

But didn’t that mean that Robby’s other-self had died in this universe and was probably waking up in his? And if you just kept waking up in different universes every time you died, didn’t that mean nobody actually ever died after all?

_ Whoa… those are some good drugs they gave me.  _

Maybe it was simpler than that. Maybe things had changed while he was passed out. Things changed with time, right? And it’d been… it’d been…

“How long was I out?” He asked out loud. 

“Over two days.” Johnny replied. 

Just two days? That wasn’t enough time to change anything. Unless something really big happened. 

“Did something happen while I was out?” He asked. 

“Yeah.” Miguel replied eagerly, wiping his eyes. “Loads.”

Robby leaned forward, curious and waiting for him to continue. 

“I told dad that Hawk has been messing with you. And others too.” Miguel launched into it. “And he kicked them out of Cobra Kai.”

Robby stared at Johnny, disbelieving and Johnny nodded in confirmation. 

“That’s not all.” Miguel continued. “Hawk then said this unbelievably shitty thing about you – doesn’t matter what – but I just lost it on him. I punched him and then before he knew it, I was just pounding him in the pavement and…” 

Robby continued to listen in growing wonder.  _ Miguel  _ beat up  _ Hawk.  _ And for  _ him.  _ With every word, Robby was growing more and more certain of his alternate-world hypothesis. 

* * *

They let him out of his restraints before Mr. LaRusso came in to see him. It was only a precaution, they said. Patients like him were often emotionally raw and vulnerable when they woke and nobody wanted him to get hysterical and do something.  _ Right! Like I’d be dumb enough to try and off myself in the hospital.  _

Still, he was thankful for that. He didn’t want Mr. LaRusso to see him trussed up like a turkey. 

“Why didn’t you tell me things were this bad?” Daniel asked reproachfully. “I thought we talked about things like that.”

Robby studied his nails. “You’d have tried to stop me.”

“Damn right I would have.” Mr. LaRusso replied. “Well, doesn’t matter now. You had your shot and you screwed it up. This isn’t going to happen again. I’ll make sure of that, even if I have to put a tracker in your neck.”

Robby smiled down at his hands. He’d dreaded hearing those words. Dreaded having his most recent failure shoved into his face. But somehow, those words didn’t sting the same coming from Mr. LaRusso. 

“Do you still feel like that? The way you did when you did… this?” Daniel asked, motioning to Robby’s wrists. 

Robby knew what he was really asking – if Robby was going to try this again. If he was just biding his time, waiting to get out of the hospital and doing it right this time.

And honestly, Robby didn’t know. 

That feeling was gone for now. That crushing weight on his soul that made it hard to breathe, made him want to escape, to sleep and sleep and never wake up. But that was nothing new. It wasn’t like he felt like that all the time. And he knew that the feeling would be back again. He didn’t know how or why or how long it’d take, but he knew it’d be back. 

He couldn’t tell Mr. LaRusso that, couldn’t freak him out more than he already had, but Daniel took his silence for an answer anyway. 

“Things will get better. I promise.” He told Robby. “I’ll make sure they do. You’ll see.”

Robby nodded but didn’t say anything. This wasn’t the first time he’d heard that. And sure, things had gotten better for him in the past. And they seemed to be better now, what with both Johnny and Miguel acting like that. 

But it never lasted, he knew that from personal experience. No matter what, things always returned to status quo – which for him meant his dad showing cursory interest in him during dinner time, Miguel ignoring him until he wanted to get off, Carmen being awkwardly nice but avoiding him when she could, his mom being gone without a word to him for months and him spending his days alone. It was the status quo itself that he hated. 

“Hey. Talk to me, kid.” Daniel put his hand over Robby’s. 

_ I should say something. Give him something. He’s trying so hard to do something to make me feel better and I should give him something to feel like he has. That’s the least I can do for him.  _

“Things are kinda better now.” Robby shrugged. 

Daniel smiled and nodded. 

It was true. He’d been a pariah in his own family not two days ago and now everyone was acting like it was the return of the prodigal son. 

Being forgiven was something Robby could understand. Sure they might all still hate him for training with Mr. LaRusso, for fighting for Miyagi-Do and beating up Hawk and others, but after what he’d done, he could expect them to atleast act like they were over it. They didn’t want to push into another attempt, after all. But the rest of it made no sense. Dad kicking Hawk and others out of the dojo? Miguel beating him up? Inviting Mr. LaRusso to see him at the hospital and it NOT turning into a brawl?

Something must have happened. That was the only explanation he kept coming back to. Something must have happened to alter the equation drastically and they were all keeping him in the dark about it. But maybe Mr. LaRusso wouldn’t. 

“It’s kinda weird, though, how they’ve been acting.” Robby added.

“They are freaked out. Nobody knows the right way to handle this.” Daniel nodded. “Not even me.”

Robby shook his head. “It’s more than that. Something happened.”

“What?”

“I don’t know.” Robby shrugged. “I thought you would.”

Daniel looked nonplussed. 

“Like – you and my dad – you guys don’t suddenly like each-other, right?” Robby asked. “You hated each-other until two days ago. You didn’t magically become friends, right?”

Daniel nodded sadly. “I don’t think that’s even possible.”

“Right.” Robby agreed. “But you are here and my dad seems okay with it. You guys aren’t trying to fight or anything. There must be a reason for that and I don’t know what that is. I thought you would.”

“I do. And so do you.” Mr. LaRusso said, frowning. “It’s what you did – what happened to you. Robby we almost lost you.”

Robby sighed. He’d considered the possibility already and found it uncompelling. There had to be more to this. 

“It didn’t matter before, when I was training with you.” He said. “They wouldn’t even talk to me. And now they just forgive me? How does that make sense?”

Mr. LaRusso had a troubled look on his face, like he could barely understand what he was hearing and what he did, shook him to his core. 

“Because something like this puts things in perspective.” He said with some difficulty. “It makes you realize what’s really important in life.”

“And that’s that?” Robby asked. 

Daniel looked like Robby had just punched him in the gut. 

“You.”

Robby resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He’d never been that important before. He’d never been good enough for that. Why would slitting his wrists change that?

* * *

His mom told him the same thing when she came to visit. 

Shannon showed up the next day and for a moment, Robby felt his spirits soar. He was seeing her for the first time in months and the last time, she was headed back to rehab again. But she was out now and the timing felt right.

Surely he could move back with her now, right? Johnny had see now that their living arrangement wasn’t working out for anybody. And Robby wasn’t a dumb thirteen-year old anymore. He was older, more mature, better able to take care of himself. He had a job and he was bringing money in and he had quite a bit saved up. No one would object to him moving back in with his mom again. And things could go back to… well, if not the good old times, then atleast the better old times. 

But those hopes were dashed the moment Shannon got closer and Robby saw that she was high again. Her face was pale, her eyes were red and her demeanor was both dazed and jittery simultaneously. Anyone else would’ve dismissed this as grief, but Robby knew the signs by now. 

Ofcourse, he should’ve known better than to get his hopes up. After all, Johnny must have told her what happened right away and it’d still taken her this long to come and see him. Atleast there was a kind of honesty to this – atleast his mom didn’t pretend to care about him more than she cared about the drugs. 

Shannon broke down crying the moment she got to his bedside and Robby awkwardly rubbed her hand, feeling wrong and uncomfortable. It should be the other way around, right?

“It’s okay, mom.” He murmured. “I’m fine now.”

And that just made her cry harder.

“I’m sorry. I should’ve come sooner.” Shannon said, finally wiping her tears. “I wanted to… I was just too ashamed to face you.”

Robby nodded uncertainly. 

“I wanted… I was hoping to get it together this time. Do get things right before I saw you again.” She smiled regretfully. “And I was so close to it too. I was finally off probation at work and I didn’t miss a single bill the last time…”

Robby listened to her ramble with a growing pit in his stomach. 

“When did you start using again?” He asked, interrupting her. 

Shannon was taken aback at the question, unsure of how to answer it. 

“It doesn’t matter.” She said after a moment. 

And guilt stabbed at Robby’s chest. 

He’d done this. His mom had been doing better, getting her life together and his dumb stunt had pushed her off the wagon. Not content with messing up his own life, he just had to take everybody else down with him as well. 

“Honey, this isn’t on you.” She must have seen something in his face. “I’m the one who screwed up, alright? I should’ve been stronger, but I wasn’t.”

_ No, that’s just something you are supposed to say. We both know that it’s a total lie.  _

But maybe something good could come out of this?

“Guess we are both screwups.” Robby said. “Maybe we should just stick together because of that.”

This could work. Shannon wouldn’t judge him for not being good enough because she’d made plenty of mistakes as well. And they could end up being good for each-other. He could help his mom get sober again and stay that way this time. And if he got that right, maybe he wouldn’t feel like such a screw-up anymore. It was good to have a purpose in life, right? A mission. Something to live for.

“We could take of each-other.” Robby suggested, hopeful again. “I could help you stay sober from now on. And that could be something I do right?”

Shannon seemed aghast at the idea. 

“I can’t put that on you.” She said, shaking her head. “Honey, listen to me. I’m your mother. I’m the one who should be taking care of you. Not the other way around. I know I screwed that up bad, but I can’t…I won’t make it worse by putting that kind of responsibility on you.”

Robby didn’t say anything to that. That was all the stuff you were supposed to say, but it didn’t mask the truth. He knew in his heart that if this worked out, it would be good for the both of them. Shannon would end up needing him and he needed to feel needed. But she wouldn’t give him the chance. After all his screwups, she didn’t trust him to succeed.

Which simply meant that this was her roundabout way of saying that she didn’t want him around after all. That being sober and getting her life together would be easier without him around, weighing her down. 

“Things will be better for you here, with Johnny.” She told him. “Just give it another chance, okay?”

“I never should’ve given it a first one.” Robby couldn’t hide his disappointment anymore. “If I hadn’t let him take me from you, if I’d fought back harder - ”

“Honey, no!” Shannon shook her head. “Taking you away from me was the one right thing Johnny did.”

He looked at her, hurt. She was happy about that?

“Listen, I wasn’t a good mother to you, okay?” Shannon explained. “I wasn’t there for you. I neglected you. I left you alone… I just… I failed you. I know that. Johnny had to do it. For your own good.”

She didn’t get it. Sure she went away all the time and sure it hurt, sitting there, waiting for her – but she always came back to him, right? That was good enough back then and it could be again. 

“You don’t know that.” He argued. “You could’ve gotten better. If he’d just let me stay with you, I’d have been right there and you’d have seen how much I needed you. And you could’ve gotten better for me.”

“It doesn’t work like that, honey.” Shannon shook her head sadly. “If there was anyone I could’ve gotten better for, it’d be you. And I’m still trying. But it’s hard and sometimes, even wanting it badly is not good enough.”

Robby nodded, finally getting her point. She could’ve gotten better for him had he been worth it. Had he been good enough. But he wasn’t and that was that. Story of his life, right?

Once again, he could feel the familiar feeling crawling up his veins and making his wounds tingle. 

“I know Johnny screwed up too – but he's going to do better now. Much better than I can.” Shannon reassured him. “Doesn’t mean I’m just gonna disappear on you again, alright? I know how this works and I’m going to a meeting right after this. But you have to stay with your dad for now. He’ll make things right and that’s what’s best for you.”

* * *

Things would get better – that’s what they all kept saying. Each in their own way, but that’s what they meant. And despite his better judgment, Robby started to want to believe them. 

_ Don’t be stupid,  _ he told himself.  _ You’ve been through this before a thousand times.  _ Every time Johnny acted like he wanted to spend time with him or Miguel was kind and compassionate or his mom got out of rehab or Mr. LaRusso taught him a new lesson – every single time he’d felt that flicker of hope only for it to be extinguished sooner or later. And it was going to be the same now. 

And it pissed him off, this constant nagging. It made him feel like he was getting things wrong somehow and he wasn’t. He’d learned from experience how things worked and they should know it by now too. 

“You gotta talk to me, kid.” Johnny pleaded with him. “You gotta tell me what’s going on in that head of yours. I can’t help you if I don’t know what’s going on with you.”

There it was again – the implication that Robby could make things better for himself with just a snap of his fingers. If it were that easy…

“I want to go on a trip.” Robby said. “Just the two of us. Nobody else.”

Johnny blinked. And then smiled.

“Ofcourse.” He nodded. “Yeah, I’d love that. Do you have some place in mind or…” 

No – too easy. That one was a softball. Johnny would say almost anything to make him happy right now. Almost. But Robby knew where the line was. 

“And I want you to shut down Cobra Kai.” He added. “I want you to work for Mr. LaRusso instead. Learn Miyagi-Do karate and start teaching that. And teach it the way he tells you to.”

Johnny’s smile disappeared at that.  _ Gotcha.  _

“Don’t think LaRusso would go for that.” He said thoughtfully. “But yeah, I’ll do my best.”

Robby’s eyes narrowed with suspicion.  _ Bullhit. I don’t buy that for one second.  _ It was the broken arm all over again. For a while Johnny would agree to anything out of guilt, but that wasn’t going to last.

“That easy, is it?” Robby asked. “You are just giving me what I want just like that?”

“Yeah.” Johnny nodded. “It is.”

“Then why the hell did it take so long?” Robby almost screamed. 

Johnny looked like he was just slapped and Robby immediately wanted to take it back. But the words just kept spilling out.

“If it’s that easy then it should’ve happened before. I shouldn’t need to ask for it.” He went on. “You should’ve known what I wanted, right? For you to spend time with me. Give a shit about what I liked and didn’t like. Maybe even be happy for me when I got something right. Was it that difficult to figure out?”

Johnny’s face crumpled, but he didn’t say anything. 

“Or is there something wrong with me?” Robby asked. “That I somehow kept messing things up?”

“No. There is nothing wrong with you.” Johnny’s voice broke a little. “I screwed up, okay? I’m not smart enough to figure this shit out. That’s why I need you to spell it out for me.”

“Bullshit.” Robby said. 

Johnny stared at him, waiting for him to go on.

“I see how you are with Miguel every day. He doesn’t need to tell you what he needs.” Robby explained. “And I know your students worship you. And they wouldn’t do that if you weren’t giving them what they needed. Why am I the only one who has to beg for it?”

Johnny didn’t have an answer to that. He just kept looking at Robby with that hangdog look on his face. 

“Maybe it’s just time to admit the truth.” Robby said, sadly. “That you never really cared about me that much. You care enough to feel guilty about it, but not enough to do anything about it.”

“That’s not true.” Johnny could barely get the words out. “I care about… I love you. More than anything…”

“Either you didn’t care enough to figure out what I needed or I wasn’t worth the effort.” Robby shrugged. “I’m not seeing a third option here.”

Johnny didn’t either. Robby could see the wheels turning in his mind, trying to figure a way out. Trying to figure out what to say to beat Robby’s argument. But there was nothing and thy both knew it. 

“I didn’t mean it – what I said before.” Robby assured him, looking down. “I don’t want you to take me on trips or close down Cobra Kai or work with Mr. LaRusso. I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to.”


	22. Robby XI

“I’m sorry.” Miguel said for the hundredth time. 

It’d almost become like a mantra to him. Ever since Robby had woken up, he worked that into every conversation they had. He kept apologizing for things that weren’t his fault. And it was getting goddamn annoying. 

“I’m sorry you feel that way, but I know it’s not like that.” He argued. “I know he loves you. He just screwed up and…” 

Robby shut him up with a glare. He didn’t have the energy to relive that particular argument. 

“Like I’m in any position to judge, right?” Miguel smiled weakly. “After all the shit I did for you.”

Robby felt awkward, all of a sudden. They hadn’t really had a chance to discuss how things would be between them going forward. Sure Miguel had been around almost constantly – either in his room or in the waiting area when Robby was with his therapist. And he stuck around until the nurses kicked him out, telling him that visiting hours were over. But there was always someone else there too. Johnny or Carmen or Rosa or Mr. LaRusso or even Sam once or twice.

Neither of them wanted to go public with the truth – so they’d kept things PG between them. Miguel brought Robby schoolwork and homework and the latest gossip and they ignored the elephant in the room. 

This was the first time they were truly alone and they couldn’t avoid talking about it anymore. 

“I’m never gonna do shit like that again.” Miguel promised. “But I understand if you can’t forgive me for it. I want you to know that if you want to tell people, I won’t blame you for it.”

Robby frowned. Tell people what? That he liked taking it up the ass? That he loved being fingered and licked open until he was a writing mess? That he liked sucking them off and swallowing their cum? That it didn’t matter if they slapped him around or punched him or treated him like a bitch, it got him off anyway?

Why would he ever want anybody to know that?

“Is that why you haven’t touched me for hours?” Robby asked. 

In truth, he had both dreaded and wanted to be alone with Miguel. He had missed those sinewy arms around him, those lips on his neck, that muscular chest against his back and hard cock spearing him open. And the very fact made him ashamed of himself. Miguel had treated him like shit. He shouldn’t get to make it all okay with a bunch of sorrys. Robby shouldn’t like him like that anymore – but he did. God help him, he did. 

“And I won’t.” Miguel said, nodding. “Not unless you say you want me to.”

Was this another way to humiliate him? To make him admit how desperate he was for it? But it didn’t look like that was what Miguel was going for. He looked ashamed, not smug. 

Of all the recent changes, the one in Miguel disturbed Robby the most. Sure Miguel could be nice to Robby when he wanted to be, but there was always a limit. A threshold to his patience that Robby had crossed a thousand times before. Like he was never happy when Robby was rude to his parents and one way or the other, he always let him know about it. Even if it was just a warning glare.

And now he was acting like… like he was Robby’s guard-dog. There really was no other way to describe it. He was always looming around, waiting on him hand and foot, barking at anyone who said a wrong word to him, but always with that look that said he was waiting for Robby to kick him.

And that just wasn’t their dynamic. Miguel was the alpha between them – the one who was better and stronger in every way. The one whose wants and needs always came first. Sure Robby didn’t always like that, but he’d gotten used to it. And this reversal made him deeply uncomfortable.

And now this?

“You won’t touch me unless I want you to?” Robby asked, squinting at him. Miguel nodded. “Why? You never cared about that before.”

Guilt. That was what Robby was seeing on his face. The emotion was so clear that it couldn’t be mistaken for anything else. 

“I didn’t know how much that hurt you.” Miguel said, looking down. “If I’d known… I’m sorry. I screwed up. But I won’t do that again.”

“I don’t hate it.” Robby admitted uncomfortably. “I mean, I kinda like what we do.”

“I know.” Miguel said. “But even when you like it, you hate how it makes you feel. And I made you feel like that. I never want to do that to you again. Iwish I could take it all back.”

He was missing something here. Robby was more certain of that than ever. This wasn’t just about what he did. His feelings on this particular subject were so tangled that even he couldn’t make heads or tails of them. No way Miguel understood it all so perfectly. 

If he’d been capable of understanding Robby this well, he wouldn’t have pulled shit like that in the first place.

“Is there something you are not telling me?” Robby asked suspiciously. 

Miguel got that guilty look again.  _ Bingo. _

“It’s gonna piss you off.” Miguel admitted. 

_ More than the shit you already pulled?  _ “Tell me.” Robby said, blankly.

“I read your journal.”

For a moment, it felt like the whole world slipped away. His journal? The one where he poured in his most embarrassing secrets and shameful feelings? And Miguel read it?

Which meant he knew… everything. 

He’d always had the upper hand in their relationship and now he had all the power he could’ve ever wanted. Sure he wasn’t using it now, but he could and would use it whenever he felt like it. Even the last corner of himself that Robby had kept hidden was now laid bare. 

“When?” Robby asked breathlessly. 

“B-before…” Miguel stuttered out. “I mean, the morning of the tournament.”

_ He knew.  _ Robby thought coldly,  _ He knew what I was going to do. And he knew how much winning meant to me and he couldn’t let me have that. He had to make sure that I went out like a humiliated loser.  _

“It really freaked me out. Especially the last page.” Miguel continued. “That’s why I fought dirty at the tournament. I thought if you didn’t win, you wouldn’t do it.”

“So you kicked my ass to save me?” Robby scoffed. “Bullshit.”

“I know it was dumb. But that’s what I thought.” Miguel pleaded. “Please – you have to believe that much. I didn’t want to lose you.”

Robby snorted and looked away. He was in no mood to be mocked. He already felt humiliated as it was. 

“I love you.” Miguel said in a rush. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you that before. I’m sorry I made you feel like I didn’t care. But I do. I swear.”

“Enough.” Robby snapped. He couldn’t handle having his feelings used against him like this. “Get out. I can’t look at your face right now. So just get out of here.”

Miguel nodded, getting up to leave, but he stopped at the door at the last moment. 

“I just need to say a few more things, okay?” He pleaded. “And then I’ll leave you alone.”

Robby didn’t look at him, but he didn’t say anything either. 

“You did nothing to be ashamed of.” Miguel said. “Dad wanted to read your journal and I didn’t let him because I thought that should be your choice – but there is nothing in there that you have to be ashamed of. It’s me who’d be in deep shit if you ever show that to anyone. You have to believe that.”

Robby scoffed again. Sure, it might look that way to some people. Or atleast, he understood why Miguel would think that way. Was that why he was being so nice? Because he was scared of Robby spilling the beans?

“And I didn’t know what Hawk was doing to you.” Miguel added. “Not until I read it in there.”

That surprised Robby and made him look back up.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” He said. “You were there. You made me blow him.”

Miguel nodded, ashamed. “I know that was fucked up. I knew it right away. I told Hawk to leave you alone after that – to not mess with you. But he didn’t listen.”

_ No. No, that couldn’t be true. It wasn’t. Hawk said Miguel was okay with it. That he told Hawk to do what he wanted to me. _

_ Except, Miguel never acknowledged it,  _ Robby realized in horror.  _ Even when he found me loose and open after taking a pounding from Hawk, he never really commented on it. He never mentioned Hawk’s name in all their time together.  _

_ No – it couldn’t be true.  _

“You were there.” Robby said. “You saw me in the lockerroom with those guys. Don’t act like you didn’t.”

Miguel looked like he was about to cry.

“That was probably my worst fuck up.” He said. “I didn’t know Hawk drugged you. I thought… it looked like… like you wanted it.”

“I hate those guys.” Robby seethed. “And you thought I wanted to be fucked by them?”

“I thought you were doing it to get back at me.” Miguel said plaintively. “We’d had a fight and - ”

“So it’s my fault?”

“No!” Miguel insisted. “Look, I fucked-up, okay? I fucked everything up. Even in ways I didn’t know about. I started this shit and it was all my fault. It’s just… I didn’t want any of that to happen to you. And I didn’t know about it. It was still my fault, but I didn’t know about it.”

“And if you had?” Robby asked. 

“I’d have stopped it. I swear.” Miguel replied. “I’d have stopped it all if I’d seen how much it was hurting you. I was too blind to see before, but I do now. And I know it doesn’t fix shit. I hate myself for everything I put you through and I wouldn’t blame you if you hated me too.”

Hate Miguel? Sure Robby was angry right now. Seething with rage, actually. But hate him? He wasn’t sure he had that in him. Especially now that he knew Miguel hadn’t done half the shit he’d blamed him for.

But he was too angry to say anything and Miguel turned around and left, having said his piece. 

* * *

  
  


“So you see? It was just a low point, with the fighting and the tournament and everything.” Robby finished. “I know I made a dumb mistake, but I was feeling really down. But things are better now. There are people who care about me all around me. I can see that now.”

“I see.” Dr. Carmichael nodded, jotting something down and Robby bit back a frustrated retort. 

This was getting ridiculous now. His wounds were fairly superficial. There was no reason for an extended hospital stay. But the doctors had insisted on keeping him there until they could make sure that he wasn’t a “danger to himself” and even though Johnny could’ve overruled them, he hadn’t. And Mr. LaRusso had agreed to that decision. 

They were all just being stupid. It wasn’t like Robby was going to throw himself in front of a bus as soon as he got out of that. But telling them that hadn’t really bolstered his case. 

The doctors were just running up the bill and sure they had an excuse, but what exactly were they expecting here? Everybody kept saying that they didn’t expect him to get better right away. So what was the point of keeping him there? They kept saying that he’d have to stay until he was ‘reasonably’ better – but that was completely vague and subjective. 

He was so ready to get back out there. Couldn’t they see that? He  _ was  _ better now. He wasn’t going to try this again, he’d decided. Things were kind of good now and he planned on enjoying it as long as it lasted. Wasn’t that good enough for now? If anything, the huge hospital bill was only going to make that time shorter. The more his family ended up paying for this, the less guilty they’d feel and the faster this phase would get over.

“Is that what you think?” Dr Carmichael had asked. “That your family cares more about how much they spend than they do about your well-being?”

That had been a mistake. Robby knew shit like that would only extend his stay here.

“I just mean that there is a line.” He’d corrected hastily. “There is only so much people can take before they give up.”

“I see.” The doctor nodded. 

That was the most frustrating thing about the guy. Robby knew that he’d have to convince him that he was alright and he’d pulled all the stops to do so. Talked for hours about his ‘feelings’, told him how much better it all felt to get it out, how he was working on himself now. He’d tried everything he could think of – including a dozen faked epiphanies about the beauty of life – and none of it had worked. It was like the guy saw right through him – all he did was say “I see” and “Okay” and “How does that make you feel?” – and then reinforced his recommendation of keeping Robby there. 

“I am getting better. Honest.” Robby insisted, smiling. “And I don’t think its good for me to stay cooped up in here. I need to get back out there. Start living my life again.”

“Okay.” Carmichael nodded. 

Robby couldn’t keep his frustration in any longer. 

“Don’t have much of a vocabulary, do you?” He snapped. “Thought you shrinks were supposed to be smart.”

“Is there something you’d like me to say?” Carmichael asked, smiling at him.

“Yeah.” Robby replied. “Tell me when I can get out of here?”

“After an indeterminable amount of time.” Came the reply. “How’s that for a vocabulary?”

“Very funny.” Robby scoffed. “Just tell me what I have to do to get out of here.”

“I told you already.” The doctor replied. “You need to participate in your therapy.”

“Are you kidding me?” Robby groaned in frustration. “I’m the only one participating. I keep talking and you just sit there, doodling and saying “I see”. Is that your whole job? Sitting there, pretending to listen while I do all the work?”

“Pretty much.” Carmichael smirked. “Sweet gig, huh? You do all the work and I cash in the cheques.”

This was pointless and he was just messing with him. Nothing Robby said was going to make a difference. The guy was going to do what he wanted anyway. So if it didn’t matter, there was no point in pretending any more. 

“Whatever.” Robby shrugged. “Not that talking about shit ever makes much of a difference anyway.”

He’d expected another “I see” at that – he hadn’t expected the guy to lean forward in his seat. 

“Finally something we can agree on.” He said. 

“Isn’t that – like – your job description?” Robby asked, confused. 

“It’s part of it.” Carmichael replied. “But talking only gets you so far. It can help you figure out the problem, but actions are how you fix it.”

Actions? So he wanted Robby to act a certain way? But it wasn’t like he could do much, stuck there. So what did the guy want from him?

“Mr. LaRusso teaches me karate and that’s pretty therapeutic.” Robby admitted quietly. “Not like punching or kicking – more meditation-like. Finding balance.”

“Now that’s interesting.” Carmichael said. “Why haven’t you told me this before?”

Robby shrugged. “Didn’t want you to think he was stepping on your toes.”

He got a laugh in response. “Anything that makes my job easier.”

_ Enough bullshit already. We’ve been dancing around in circles for ages.  _

“I don’t know what you want from me.” Robby said, frustrated. “You say you want to help but none of this shit is helpful. How exactly are you going to help me by keeping me a prisoner here? And don’t say some stupid shit like how that makes me feel – answering a question with another one is fucking annoying.”

Carmichael nodded, considering. “You are a smart kid, Robby.”

“Yeah, I know. Smartass.” Robby scoffed. 

“No – a smart kid. You’ve already figured out what I want from you.” He explained. “That’s for you’ve been trying to give me these past few days – that reassurance that this won’t happen again.”

“I already told you…”

“I know. But you are not the only smart one here. And this isn’t my first rodeo.” The doctor smiled, gently. “I can smell your bullshit a mile away. So how about we cut the bullshit and just be honest with each-other?”

_ How the hell did he turn this around on me? _

“Fine.” Robby rolled his eyes. 

“Okay. So then, do you really think you are better?” Carmichael asked. 

“Yes.” Robby gave the conditioned reply. And then he thought about it. “I mean, I don’t know. I feel better – most of the times. I don’t want to do  _ that _ right now. But I don’t think this is going to last.”

“But it could.” Carmichael argued. “Everyone is treating you differently, aren’t they? Nicer?”

“Yeah – because of what I did. Isn’t that fucked up? I need to almost kill myself to make things better?” Robby shook his head. “They are doing it out of guilt and they won’t feel guilty forever… So it’s not gonna last.”

Carmichael nodded seriously and jotted something down. 

“Does it matter to you why they are acting different?”

“Doesn’t it? Shouldn’t it?” Robby asked, frowning. “I mean, I’m gonna make the best of things as long as they last, but knowing that they won’t last… that matters, right?”

Carmichael pursed his lips, but nodded anyway. “Alright. Thanks for being honest.”

_ Quid pro quo, Clarice. _

“Your turn.” Robby said. “So how are you gonna help me get better?”

He got a smile in return. “You got one thing right – actions matter more than talking. And that’s my job here – to guide you to the right actions to make your life better.”

Robby shook his head.  _ If only it was that easy. _

“So what? I just listen to you? Obey you blindly?” He asked. “Behave myself and everything will be alright?”

“Not at all.” Carmichael replied. “Robby, when I say ‘right’ actions, I mean right for you. If that includes misbehaving and rebelling every now and then, that’s okay too.”

Robby frowned and leaned forward, finally interested in what the guy had to say. 

“Look, you can’t control how others act towards you. But you can control how you react to it. And to some extent, how you feel about it. And that makes a lot of difference.” Carmichael went on. “If you let me, I can help you figure that shit out.”

Robby considered the offer. He could do that much, couldn’t he? He didn’t expect anything out of it, but he was going to stick around for a while anyway and it wasn’t like he had anything to lose here. 

“Alright. But that’s kinda general.” He said, nodding. “You got anything more specific in mind.”

“Yes.” The doctor nodded. “But let’s start with discharging you and setting up a weekly appointment.”

That took him back. He stared at the guy in surprise.  _ Just like that? This is all it took? _

“Seriously?”

“I needed some genuine assurance that you are not thinking of making an attempt again.” Carmichael explained. “And you just gave it to me. And you are right – things won’t get better if you are just stuck in here.”

But… no! Robby had just confessed to thinking about it. About waiting for things to get worse again. 

“Don’t overthink it, kid.” The doctor smiled at him again. “You said you wouldn’t do it if things got better. And it’s my job to make sure that they do. And I’m damn good at my job.”

* * *

Johnny took a deep breath, trying to hold on to his courage. The silence was grating on him and he tried to think of something to break it. But he’d already said everything he had to say – laid himself bare and submitted himself to judgment. And he had nothing else to add. 

_ How did it come to this?  _ He asked himself for the thousandth time. Johnny wasn’t a perfect man. He had made mistakes – a lot of them. Especially when it came to Robby. But he learned from them. He always tried to do better. To make himself better. A better person. A better father. 

Or atleast, that’s what he’d always told himself. 

Now, it felt like he’d learned nothing at all. Things wouldn’t have come to this if he had, right? He’d just been fooling himself all this time and his blindness had almost cost him something irreplaceable. He had driven Robby to this, he had made a mess of their relationship and he knew he had to fix that. And to do that, he first had to fix himself. 

It wasn’t going to be easy - which, ironically, was the problem here. 

What Robby had said to him had cut him to the bone. And worse, he’d had no answer to give his son. Even though he knew that Robby was dead wrong on both counts. 

Ofcourse he loved Robby. More than anything else in the world. No one and nothing in the world could make him as scared or angry as that kid. Not even Miguel. 

Sure it was the same thing with Miguel. Despite knowing that the kid could handle himself, Johnny still always felt a tug of nervousness when he saw him spar. But it wasn’t even comparable to the full-blown panic he’d felt when he’d seen Robby tumble down those stairs. And he knew that that reaction could only come from love. 

So Robby was completely and utterly wrong in believing that his father didn’t love him. 

But it wasn’t his fault either. He was a kid. Sure, he was angry and rude and rebellious and downright disrespectful – but that’s how teenagers were. Especially the ones who felt hurt and rejected. 

And he was nowhere close to as bad as Johnny used to be himself. Sneaking out to go to parties behind his mother’s back, telling her not to come to his tournaments because her cheering embarrassed him, sneaking girls into the house, getting into fights – Johnny had done all that and worse. He knew he’d disappointed his mom a thousand times over, but even through all that, he’d never doubted that she loved him more than anything. He had always known that no matter what he did or how badly he behaved, her love for him was not going to change. He knew that, because she’d made sure that he’d know it. 

And Johnny hadn’t done the same for Robby. That too was Johnny’s fault, not Robby’s. He was supposed to make sure that his son knew that he was loved unconditionally and he’d utterly failed at that. 

So what exactly had gone wrong between them?

He didn’t have an answer back then. It’d taken him quite a few sleepless nights to figure it out. Acknowledging the truth to himself had been the most difficult part and the irony of that didn’t escape him. 

Johnny was used to taking the easy way out. That was the simple fact he’d been unwilling to face. Ever since he was a kid, he’d avoided things that made him feel bad. Conflicts, uncomfortable truths, unpleasant conversations, admitting to his own guilt – sure, nobody actually liked to engage in that stuff, but Johnny had become an expert at putting them out of his mind. At ignoring the existence of those issues until they seemed either not to matter or became unfixable. 

He’d always rationalized it to himself. This attitude had cost him a lot through life, but he’d always told himself that either those things didn’t matter or that he still had time to fix them. Except he couldn’t do that here. Not anymore. 

He’d almost lost Robby. Had he been even a few minutes late, there would’ve been no second chance. He’d have lost the most important thing in his life and there would’ve been no fixing that. All because he avoided things that made him feel bad and there was a lot to feel bad about here. 

Because dealing with Robby was difficult – that much was true. Miguel and his other students were ridiculously simple in comparison. He hadn’t cared as much about them in the beginning – hadn’t cared if they really liked him or hated him – and that had allowed him to go with his gut and do what felt right. And he’d managed to build on that. And sure, it helped that they practically worshipped him – hanged on to his every word and obeyed him unquestioningly. Even though he knew he screwed up with them plenty of times, they hadn’t held that against him. If anything, they’d made him feel like he could do no wrong. 

It was the opposite with Robby. He had a lifetime of failures to contend with there and that led to a vicious cycle. He was always too in his head, too afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing that he ended up screwing things anyway. And then he avoided even thinking about the unpleasantness – and Robby with it – until he was ready to give in another shot. 

He had taken the easy way out – like always – and that had led Robby to believe that he didn’t care. That Robby couldn’t come to him for advice or help or comfort.

He had to fix this, he knew, but this feeling wasn’t new to him. He’d felt this way before, thinking he’d figured out what was wrong and trying to fix it, only to make it worse. He needed help to do this right. 

And asking for help for something like this was probably the most difficult thing he’d ever done. It went against his every instinct to leave himself vulnerable and exposed like this – and that his how he knew this was the right thing to do. 

“I’m not sure this is the right thing.” Carmichael mused. “Treating both of you would be a conflict.”

Johnny sat there, practically feeling the judgment in that voice.  _ You are a shitty father who drove his son to suicide,  _ said the subtext.  _ Why would I want anything to do with you? _

The unspoken criticism made Johnny defensive as always. He never could handle anyone judging him. Every instinct in him told him to snap back with something cutting and walk out of there. But that would’ve been the easy path and he was done with that. 

And he deserved to be judged anyway. 

“Look, I need to do better with Robby and I don’t know how.” Johnny pleaded. “We both know it’s my fault he ended up here.”

“I don’t think it’s fair of you to blame yourself.” Carmichael said, almost sympathetically. 

Johnny scoffed. “C’mon doc. What happened to giving it to me straight?”

The doctor smiled at that. “Fair enough.” He said. “Yes, a lot of Robby’s issues can be traced back to you and your relationship with him. But that’s just the tip of the iceberg. There is a lot more that I can’t talk about with you. And even more that Robby hasn’t told us yet. Things he is still not ready to talk about.”

Johnny nodded. Sure, he knew he wasn’t the only one who’d screwed up. They’d all failed Robby one way or the other. Still, it didn’t let him off the hook for his part in it. 

“Maybe. But I still need to do better.” Johnny said firmly. “And I need to  _ learn  _ how to do better. And I don’t think I can do that on my own. I tried before and it didn’t work. And since you are talking to Robby, you’d know what I’m doing wrong. And what I can do to make it right.”

Carmichael mulled it over, weighing the pros and cons.

“I won’t share anything that Robby tells me during our sessions. I take confidentiality very seriously. And if you try to get anything out of me, that’ll be the end of this.” He said, finally. “And the moment I feel like there is conflict, I’ll dropping you as a patient. Those are my terms.”

Johnny nodded, agreeing. It was a lot more reasonable than he’d expected. 

“Alright.” Carmichael agreed. “So you think that the problem is that you are used to taking the easy way out? Can you tell me when it started?...”


	23. Miguel XII

_ It’s no use, he wanted to say. No use at all. It’s too late. We are too late. _

_ “Shut up.” Johnny yelled, not even looking at him. “Shut the fuck up. You don’t get to say that. This is your fault. You did this.” _

_ Miguel stood there, watching Johnny do compressions on Robby’s chest. Anybody could see that was pointless. Robby’s was white as a ghost and his clothes were covered in blood. His eyes were wide open and blank – and looking at Miguel accusingly.  _

_ “You did this.” Robby said. “You killed me.” _

_ I’m sorry. I never wanted to hurt you. Please, I’m sorry. _

_ “Why?” Hawk asked, sitting on the edge of the bloody tub and enjoying the show. “You always hated the little shit. You never wanted him around. And now he’s gone. Why aren’t you happy? I know I am.” _

_ No, I didn’t hate him. I didn’t, I didn’t, I didn’t. I loved him. I still love him.  _

_ “Bullshit.” Hawk scoffed with a familiar smirk. “You don’t to the shit you did to him to someone you love. If you loved him, you wouldn’t have let me torture him.” _

_ I didn’t know. If I’d known… _

_ “You knew.” Robby cut in. “Maybe not all of it, but you knew they were bullying me. And you blinded yourself from the rest. You could’ve seen it all if you’d wanted to.” _

_ I’m sorry. You are right. I fucked up. It’s all my fault. But please, just give me a chance. Just one chance to make this right. I won’t fuck up again. Please, just once… _

_ “It’s too late. You’ll never make this right. You killed me and now you have to live with that.” _

_ Everything swirled around him. The ground disappeared from under his feet. He was falling though air, trying to latch onto something as Robby looked down on him.  _

Miguel woke up, breathing heavily. The sheets were tangled around him and he was covered in cold sweat. His heart was beating against his chest with a sick  _ thud-thud-thud _ . Everything was dark around him and he still didn’t know where he was and what wsa going on. 

_ A dream,  _ he told himself.  _ It was just a nightmare. _

Or was it. 

Still foggy and sleep-confused, Miguel tried to search his mind, trying to figure out which memories were real and which were dreams. Robby  _ had _ tried to kill himself – he knew that for sure. Seeing that pale, lifeless body was not a dream. But they’d gotten there in time – called 911 and managed to get Robby to the hospital. They’d saved him and he’d come back a few days ago. 

Or was that a dream? A fantasy Miguel’s mind had made up to deal with his own culpability? Maybe he had repressed the truth – the funeral, the hateful, accusing looks, the pain of losing him. Maybe his mind had broken and come up with the delusion of Robby’s survival. 

Miguel got up and out of the bed in a rush, almost tripping over the sheets tangled around his legs. He stumbled ahead in the dark, his mind getting clearer by the second, but the awful fear never truly leaving him. He had to know for sure. He had to make sure that Robby was still alive, that he was still breathing. That Miguel still had the chance to make this right. 

The relief of seeing Robby in his bed lasted only a moment. Miguel could see his chest rise and fall with quiet breaths, but it wasn’t enough. He looked like a ghost in the moonlight and Miguel still couldn’t be sure he was really there. He needed more – a lot more to verify that he was still alive. 

He almost reached out to touch him, stopping himself at the last moment. He stood there, with his hand hovering over Robby’s chest, uncertain of what to do. He’d always done this – reached out and touched Robby whenever he’d wanted. Made him feel helpless and scared and that had pushed him over the edge. He knew he couldn’t do that again, no matter how much he wanted to. 

“Not you too.” Robby said, sleepily. 

He was looking at Miguel with annoyed, dazed eyes and Miguel stood there, abashed. Much like Johnny had been last night.

Miguel had woken up to the sound of their bedroom door opening and watched Johnny’s shadow tread over to Robby’s bed. He’d hovered there for a while before sitting down at the edge and stroking Robby’s head.  _ Real men don’t cry,  _ Johnny had always told him and he hadn’t. But Miguel had heard those sniffs anyway. 

He’d stayed there for what felt like an eternity, sniffling, running his fingers through Robby’s hair and not saying anything. And Miguel had kept pretending to be asleep, even though he knew that he wasn’t fooling anyone. It’d felt like they were going to spend the whole night that way until Robby had gotten annoyed and told Johnny he had school the next day. 

“Yeah. Get some rest.” Johnny had said in a trembling voice before quietly leaving the room. 

And now Miguel was doing the same thing. 

“Sorry.” He said, softly. “I just…”

He thought about it. He wasn’t going to push himself on Robby anymore, but if Robby allowed it…

“Can I sleep with you tonight?” He asked. 

Robby looked up at him uncertainly.

“I won’t try anything. I just need to sleep with you. That’s all.”  _ Just need to feel your warm skin against mine, your heart beating under my hands, to hear your breaths. To know that you are still here.  _

Robby still didn’t answer. 

“You can tell me to fuck-off if you want.” Miguel assured him. 

“Alright.” Robby nodded. “Fuck off.”

That felt like a knife to his chest. But Miguel guessed he deserved it. Robby didn’t owe him anything. He was under no obligation to make Miguel feel better. And after everything, it was hardly a surprise that Robby would want him anywhere around him. 

Hanging his head, Miguel turned to return to his own bed. 

“Wait.” He heard Robby say. “Just…”

He turned around to watch Robby scoot over, making space for him and lifting his covers in an invitation. Robby turned his back to him, lying on his side and waiting for Miguel to get in. 

“You sure?” Miguel asked. 

“You want me to change my mind?” Robby replied. 

He didn’t need to be told again. Miguel got in behind him, pulling the covers back up over them both. He spooned Robby from behind, wrapping his arms around the boy and pulling him flush against his chest. He could feel Robby’s hair tickling his nose and he buried his face in them. 

He could feel Robby’s butt pressing up against his groin, but he’d meant what he said. He wasn’t going to pressure Robby into anything. He shifted a little, moving his hips back so as not to press against him anymore.

“What are you doing?” Robby asked. 

“I didn’t…” What? What did he do now? How was he screwing this up? “Nothing.”

“Why not?” Robby asked, annoyed. “You are not into me anymore?”

“That’s not…” Miguel sighed. Even doing the right thing, he found a way to ho make him feel bad. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Never stopped you before.” Miguel could practically feel the eye-roll. 

“I know. But I didn’t know how much I was hurting you. I won’t do that again.”

Robby was quiet for a moment, taking it in. 

“So that’s the only way you want me?” Robby asked. “If you can’t hurt me you just don’t want me?”

_ Dammit. What am I doing wrong? I want you,  _ Miguel wanted to say.  _ But I’m afraid. Too afraid of messing it up again. Please understand.  _

“I think you should go back to your own bed.” Robby said softly. 

Miguel didn’t say anything as he made his way back in the dark. 

* * *

It had to be in all the little things. They’d all made Robby feel like no one cared and now, no matter how much they told him otherwise, he was not going to believe them. So they’d have to show him – little by little, in a thousand small ways, they’d need to show him. 

Johnny was doing his part. He gave Robby his skateboard back the day he came back from the hospital. 

“You were good out there, alright?” He told him. “It really blew my mind to see how good you were. But then you fell and all I could think of was… Sorry, I should’ve handled that better. And I’m still not gonna let you pull any stupid stunts like that again. Got it?”

Robby looked at him skeptically. He always looked like that nowadays. 

“So how’s this gonna work?” He asked. 

“Well, you are gonna wear a helmet and stuff. And someone will always need to be there with you, just to make sure that…”

“I mean us.” Robby clarified. “How are we gonna work from now on? Because I’m getting sick of you asking how I’m feeling all the time.”

Johnny nodded. “We’ll try to be there for you more. Talk more. Do more of the stuff you want.” He said. “But you have to meet us halfway. You gotta talk to us. I won’t keep bugging you, but if you need something or want something, you gotta ask. Just try telling us.”

Robby’s worked his mouth open and closed as if he was trying to say something. 

“I tried telling you.” He said, as Miguel had feared. “You never listen.”

“Well, I’m listening now.” Johnny replied.

_ And all it took for that to happen was Robby almost killing himself.  _ Nobody said that, but the sentiment hung in the air all the same. 

Miguel wasn’t sure where to start himself, so he decided to start by trying to be a friend. By simply being there, around, without any expectations. And the more time he spent with Robby, the guiltier he felt. 

Turned out, Robby wasn’t always that quiet. It just took the right person to bring it out of him. 

“Hey! I was perfect, alright.” Robby told Sam. “You were the one who kept stepping wrong and landed us in the pond.”

“Whatever you say, Swayze!” Sam scoffed back. 

Miguel had started sitting with Robby in the cafeteria and it was awkward at first. Sam was the only one who used to sit with him – when she wasn’t sitting with her own friends, that was – and there was still some awkwardness between them from last year’s tournament. But she was a sweet girl after all and like Miguel and his friends, they often talked about their own karate lessons.

“I told you that in confidence.” Robby said, mockingly indignant.

“Told her what?” Miguel cut in, curious. 

“That he loved Dirty Dancing.” Sam said, smirking. 

“It was okay.” Robby shrugged, nonchalant. 

“Whatever you say, Swayze!” Sam repeated. 

Miguel did not like that – the way these two already had their inside jokes with each-other. 

“Bet there is a story behind the whole Swayze thing.” He asked. 

Sam gave him a weird look. 

“Not really.” She said. “It’s just his middle name.”

Robby had a middle name? And it was Swayze? They were kidding, right?

“Mom was a fan.” Robby said, shrugging. 

Miguel didn’t buy it at first – it felt like there was a joke in there, somewhere and it was on him. But it turned out to be true. And Robby had the documentation to prove it. 

“How did I not know about this before?” Miguel asked, incredulously. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“You never asked.” Robby shrugged, guiltily. 

_ I should be the one feeling guilty. I’ve lived in the same room with him for three years and I didn’t know. What else have I never asked him? _

It felt so inadequate now. Sure he asked and Robby told him what he wanted to know, but it still felt like too little too late. And he couldn’t even make himself feel better by saying it was the same thing other way around. Because Robby knew all about his likes and dislikes. He knew all about his favorite movies and music and shows and food. 

“That’s different.” Robby told him later. “I just know that stuff because you never shut up about it. Whenever you find something you like, you just talk about it for days to everyone.”

And that was supposed to make it better?

Sure Miguel knew he’d always done that. It was something he barely even thought about. He’d been like that ever since he was a child – talking everyone’s ears off about his everything on his mind and basking in the attention he got. But that had left no room for Robby at the table. He’d cornered the market there and left Robby out in the cold.

“You can do that too.” Miguel suggested. “I’d love to know more about you.”

Robby shook his head sadly. “I tried competing with you on that before and lost. Badly. I’m not gonna try that again.”

He saw Miguel’s confused look and went on. 

“That day at the skate-park when I broke my arm?” He explained. “I was trying to show off for dad. But he wasn’t paying attention and didn’t even see me fall.” He saw the stricken look on Miguel’s face. “Look, I’m not trying to make you feel guilty, okay? We were both competing for his attention and you won. It’s that simple.”

It wasn’t simple. Not at all. Sure it wasn’t all on Miguel. Johnny should’ve paid more attention, after all. And maybe Robby shouldn’t have given up so easily. But maybe is Miguel hadn’t been there, soaking up all the attention…

He wanted to do better now. He was determined to. But no matter how hard they all tried, it felt like they were too late. 

Robby had gotten used to being on the sidelines. To being ignored. To go through dinners quietly, eating his food, while Miguel rambled on about his day. To not voicing an opinion whenever they talked about picking a movie for the night or going out for dinner. And now, being asked all that out of nowhere, always threw him. 

“Just pick whatever you want, okay?” He snapped one day after Johnny asked him where to go for dinner. “I really don’t care where we eat.”

“Robby, c’mon. We are trying here.” Miguel pleaded with him. “Just tell us what you want.”

“What I want is not to think about this crap.” Robby answered. 

* * *

Robby came to him that night. Crawled into his bed, on top of him and started kissing him. And Miguel gave into it. He let Robby pin his shoulders to the mattress and arched up, letting him invade his mouth. 

Something felt off – Miguel realized that right away. Maybe it was Robby boldly taking the lead. He’d never done that before. Or maybe it was the desperation he felt in his panting breaths. But whatever it was, Robby was finally going for something he wanted and Miguel wasn’t about to deny him that. So he ran his hands up his thighs and grabbed his ass to pull him closer. 

And then his hand slipped inside Robby’s pajamas only to find him soft and shrunken. 

“Robby wait!” Miguel said, pushing him away a little. 

“Just keep doing that.” Robby insisted. “Give me a minute and I’ll get there.”

_ You shouldn’t have to. You don’t have to make yourself do this.  _

Miguel pushed at him harder this time and Robby moved back, his disappointed clear in his face. 

Why was he doing this? Why was he trying to force himself when Miguel wasn’t? Was he that desperate to feel wanted? 

“I want this, okay?” Miguel reassured him. “I really do. You can feel that, right?” Robby nodded. “But not like this. Not if you don’t really want it too.”

Robby sighed, leaning his head against the wall and closing his eyes. 

“I don’t know what I want anymore.” He said, softly. “I thought I did, but now – I really don’t know.”

Miguel didn’t know what to say. He was trying to get it. He really was. He was trying to understand where Robby was coming from. They wanted to make things right – to fix things. But sometimes, it felt like Robby was too broken to be fixed. 

Robby laid back down on the bed, curling up with his back to Miguel. Miguel got the message and curled up behind him, wrapping his arms around the smaller boy. Maybe all Robby wanted – needed – was some comfort and intimacy and Miguel could give him that. 

“You guys aren’t doing anything wrong.” Robby said, softly. “I always thought I wanted this – everyone asking me about my day, asking me what I want to do, wanting to spend time with me.”

Miguel nodded into Robby’s hair. It wasn’t much to ask, was it? And it shouldn’t have taken this for them to give him that.

“But it doesn’t feel like I thought it would.” Robby continued. “It doesn’t make me happy. Just makes me anxious. Like I’m screwing up somehow.”

Miguel didn’t understand that – not even a little bit. It felt like Robby was saying they couldn’t win. If he felt bad when they ignored and felt bad when they paid attention, how exactly were they supposed to fix this?

“It’s okay.” Robby needed reassurance and Miguel could give him that much atleast. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”

It sounded lame even to him, but Robby accepted the sentiment anyway and pushed himself closer. 

“Dr. Carmichael says it’s because of depression.” Robby explained quietly. “He says that I’ve gotten too comfortable not wanting anything and that having the option now makes me uncomfortable.”

Miguel understood then and felt like crying all over again.  _ We did this to you. I did this to you. It started with not giving you what you want until you stopped asking. And then you forgot how to want things. _

“I’m gonna jerk you off, alright?” Miguel whispered softly. “You can tell me to stop if you want or if I do anything you don’t like. Is that okay.”

He felt Robby nod and slipped his hand inside his boxers. Robby pushed his ass against Miguel’s boner, but Miguel ignored that. Instead he focused on kissing Robby’s neck and stroking him hard. 

* * *

Miguel wasn’t sure that Robby loved him. Not anymore. 

Or maybe he never really did in the first place. Maybe it was Miguel forcing himself upon the guy that made him think that way. But now that Robby was free to explore what he wanted, it turned out that he didn’t want anything to do with Miguel after all. 

The ban on dating was lifted as well – for both of them – but Miguel found out that he wasn’t interested in finding dates after all. It wasn’t even about not making Robby feel bad – it was simply that nobody caught his interest. 

Nobody except Robby. 

Miguel couldn’t deny being in love with him anymore. Not once he really started paying attention. And Robby didn’t love him back. 

Sure the guy still came to Miguel for comfort and intimacy, but that was out of habit. Because he didn’t have any other options. But now that the pressure was off, Robby was doing it less and less. It was clear as day that Robby was falling out of love with him. 

And falling in love with Sam.

_ You have no right to be jealous,  _ he told himself.  _ Absolutely no right. _

He didn’t deserve Robby. He’d been an asshole to the guy. Worse. He tormented and tortured him. It was a miracle that Robby didn’t hate him in the first place. He should be happy with whatever he got. And he should be happy that Robby finally had someone worthy of him. 

And Sam _was_ worthy of him, he realized with frustration. She’d always been nice to him, always been loving and supportive. She’d been a true friend – more than Miguel ever had. She was smart and funny and sweet and she appreciated Robby in a way Miguel wished he had from the start. She made him laugh, she brought him out of his shell, she got him to express himself – everything Miguel wished he could make him do. 

And it was driving him insane with jealousy. 

“It’s very Romeo and Juliet.” Johnny joked after the two had spent Miguel’s birthday party huddled in the corner together. “Just make sure it doesn’t end the same way.”  __

“We’re not together.” Robby huffed. “We’re just friends.”

_ Not yet,  _ Miguel thought, seething with envy. 

It was going to happen. He could see that clearly. It was only a matter of time. And he had no right to complain. Robby was finally getting something that made him happy and Miguel was not going to stand in his way. Not anymore.


	24. Robby XII

“Get up. Best to start this trip early.”

Robby groaned as his father’s voice cut through the haze of sleep. Was it that time of the year already? Facing people at school, everyone giving him those pitying looks, was hard enough already. He had no intention of going camping with Johnny’s other students. 

“I’m good, thanks.” He muttered sleepily. “You and Miguel can go enjoy yourselves.”

“Miguel’s not coming. It’s just us.” Johnny replied. “C’mon. We are losing daylight.”

_What daylight?_ Robby forced his eyes open and saw that it was still dark outside. Everything came back to him as sleep left him. They’d talked about it a few days before – a trip for just the two of them. Like Robby had told him. He hadn’t thought that Johnny was going to take him seriously. 

“You don’t have to do this, okay?” Robby had told him. “Don’t ice Miguel out just because you feel guilty."

“I’m not icing him out.” Johnny had replied. “I spend a lot of time with him already. He’s not gonna break if I spend some more with you. And I’m not doing it out of guilt. I’ve wanted this forever – I just didn’t think you wanted to.”

Robby hadn’t bought that completely, but accepted anyway. And Miguel did seem to be okay with it. Still, he wasn’t prepared to head out this early in the day. 

* * *

He fell asleep in the car again with his forehead against the cool glass window. He figured he might end up sleeping all the way there, only to be woken by the loud honking. 

They’d stopped in a residential street and Robby’s eyes were too blurry too see where. 

“You know I love you, right?” Johnny said, turning to him. “There is nothing I’d put ahead of you.”

Robby grunted sleepily, rubbing the gunk out of his eyes. 

He’d been hearing that a lot lately and once upon a time, he’d have given anything to be told that. But now… it felt like he was just waiting for the other shoe to drop. 

It felt wrong.  _ He  _ felt wrong. It felt like he’d gotten everything he’d ever wanted by doing something messed up. Like he was forcing them to do things they didn’t want to by using himself as a hostage – with the threat of his life hanging over their heads. And that wasn’t how he’d wanted it. That wasn’t why he’d done it. 

Even this trip… 

He had wanted something like this all his life. They were going to drive through the backroads to a lake and spend the afternoon fishing. And then they were going to camp out, hopefully eating what they caught. Five years ago, the very prospect would’ve left Robby sleepless. Now, it felt like he was making Johnny do it with a gun to his head. 

“I’ll do anything for you.” Johnny continued. “Things I’d never do for anybody else. Even Miguel.”

Robby scoffed. He knew that wasn’t true. 

“You won’t take Miguel on a one-on-one trip?” He said. “Because I know you have done that before.”

“This isn’t going to be a one-on-one trip.” Johnny said, smiling. 

The trunk of the car slammed closed, making Robby jerk wide awake. He’d been too drowsy before but he was fully awake now. And he knew where they were. In front of Mr. LaRusso’s house. And Mr. LaRusso was opening the car door and sliding into the back-seat. 

“Let’s go.” He said, pulling in his camping bag behind him. “We’re losing daylight.”

Robby stared at him. And then at Johnny.

“Yeah – Daniel’s coming with us on the trip.” Johnny said, smirking. “I won’t do _that_ for anybody else.”

Robby was speechless. This wasn’t something he’d even dreamed of. Sure he’d hoped that Johnny would put him above their rivalry, that he’d be happy for Robby to train at Miyagi-Do even though he hated Mr. LaRusso. And to his credit, Johnny had allowed it. But he’d never dared to hope for anything more. 

“Is this supposed to prove something?” He asked, disbelieving. 

“Kinda.” Daniel replied. “Whatever dumb crap we had between us is not worth hurting our kids. So we are putting it behind us today. You are more important than that to both of us.”

_ They are willing to get along with each-other for my sake?  _ Robby thought, incredulously.  _ Well, maybe not get along exactly,  _ he thought a moment later. 

“Is that a fishing vest?” Johnny asked, peering into the rearview mirror. 

“We are going fishing.” Daniel replied, proudly looking down at his accessories. 

“You’re such a nerd.” Johnny shook his head. 

“Great start, Johnny.” Daniel shook his head as well. 

* * *

Okay, so maybe Robby should just focus on the sentiment behind the gesture. Because there was no way these two were ever going to actually get along. Not with how they bickered and sniped at each-other constantly. At best, they could hope to tolerate each-other. 

And maybe that was enough. 

“Careful!” Johnny shouted, slamming on the imaginary brakes. “Watch the potholes.”

Robby jumped, but kept the steering wheel under control. Thankfully there wasn’t another car in sight for miles. 

It’d been Johnny’s idea, letting Robby practice his driving. Somehow, he’d forgotten that Robby had been working at LaRusso auto for ages and taking customers out for test drives whenever needed. Not that you’d know it from the way he was driving today. 

Once again, he found himself getting nervous under Johnny’s eyes and Johnny didn’t help the matters with his endless stream of advice. 

“He knows what he is doing.” Mr. LaRusso said. “So you can stop back-seat driving.”

“I’m in the front-seat.” Johnny sniped back. “You stop back-seat-back-seat drivi- WATCH OUT!”

Something scampered across the road and Robby braked and swerved way harder than necessary. They went off the road, grinding to a halt on the gravel, but the scariest part was the loud bang they all heard. 

“It’s a flat, alright!” Mr. LaRusso said, staring at the tire and shaking his head. “Happy now?”

“Don’t blame him!” Johnny said, hotly. “This could’ve happened to anyone.”

“I’m not blaming him, you moron, I’m blaming you.” Daniel snapped back. “This wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t been disturbing him every few seconds.”

“I was teaching him.” Johnny defended. “I was being helpful.”

“Well, you can be helpful and get me the jack.” Mr. LaRusso said. “I’ll get this changed in no time.”

“You? You can’t change a flat.”

“Which one of us owns a car dealership?”

“It’s my car. And don’t you just sell cars? What do you know about fixing them?”

“A lot more than you.”

“Oh yeah? What are you gonna do when…”

Robby tuned them out. He was getting used to the bickering now. And he was the one who’d made this mess. He should be the one to fix it. 

They were both too busy arguing the finer points of car maintenance to notice Robby get the jack out and get to work. He didn’t need any help though. This was one of the first things he’d learned at LaRusso Auto. 

“Let’s go!” He said, putting the jack back after he was done and slamming the trunk shut. “We are losing daylight.”

They were staring at him, both of them. And then Mr. LaRusso got a proud look on his face and Johnny followed soon after. 

“That was fast.” He said. 

“Didn’t feel like it.” Robby replied. “You two were arguing for hours.”

Johnny laughed and clapped his shoulder. Robby ignored it, but couldn’t help but smile to himself as he made his way to the passenger side. 

“Where do you think you are going?” Johnny asked. 

Robby looked at his, surprised. He couldn’t mean… not after what just happened…

“Get back in the driver’s seat.” Johnny ordered. “We are not done with the lesson yet.”

* * *

They stopped at a backroads bar for lunch. Though “bar” was way too kind a word to describe it. It was the seediest place Robby had ever seen – dark and dank with sticky floor and the air full of smoky haze. And the bikers and truckers already drinking there didn’t make the place look any more inviting. Mr. LaRusso scrunched up his nose at the place, but Johnny just smirked, feeling right at home. 

They did get more than a few weird looks as they walked in and Robby didn’t get it at first. Surely there was nothing odd about a couple of guys walking in there for lunch. It was the only place you could get some food for miles, after all. But then he heard someone murmur “Fucking queers!” and he understood. 

And almost laughed out loud. His dad and Mr. LaRusso were the furthest thing from a couple and them being mistaken for one was funny as hell. He looked at them to gauge their reactions but they didn’t seem to have noticed anything. 

“Can I have a beer too?” Robby asked, testing the waters. 

“Hell no!” Mr. LaRusso said immediately. “You are too young and you are driving!”

“Please?” Robby tried anyway, looking at Johnny.

“Just one glass.” Johnny relented. “It’ll be fine, Daniel. I’ll take over driving.”

Mr. LaRusso frowned and nodded and Robby felt his spirits soar. 

“You know, I’ve never played pool before either.” Robby hinted.

They both laughed at the transparent non-request. 

“Sure thing.” Johnny said, clapping him on the shoulder. “Let’s wait for a table to open up and I can teach you a few things.”

It was turning out to be a great trip after all. They sat at their table, eating wings and drinking beer (Johnny had a coke – Daniel insisted on it) and talked about meaningless crap like what kind of beer was the best. A while later, Robby got up and went to the table that looked like it was going to open up. It was all turning out better than Robby could’ve ever hoped for and he was determined not to do anything to ruin it. 

That was before one of the bikers sidled up to him. 

“Need some lessons playing pool, sweatheart?” He said, getting uncomfortably close. 

“Thanks.” Robby replied politely. “But my dad’s got it covered.”

“Which one?” The guy asked, looking back at them. 

Robby chuckled at that, not bothering to correct him. And that was his mistake.

“They must have taught you a lot already, right?” The biker whispered in Robby’s ear and Robby flushed as he felt a hand grab his ass. 

Before he knew it, his own was swinging sideways. 

Robby groaned, sitting on the log by the side of the road and pressing an ice-pack to his face.

“Does it always have to end with a fight with you?” Mr. LaRusso asked angrily. But it wasn’t directed at Robby. 

“They were ganging up on him.” Johnny replied hotly. “What was I supposed to do? Let them beat up my kid.”

Mr. LaRusso huffed in frustration. “We were outnumbered Johnny. Robby could’ve gotten seriously hurt.”

“I know that.” Johnny snapped back. “But we had no choice.”

More like Robby had left them no choice. The first guy had gone down right away after Robby had smashed his beer mug against his face. But then his friends had jumped in and both Daniel and Johnny had been forced to intervene. It had turned into an all-out brawl as more and more people kept joining in and in the end, Johnny had dragged him out while Mr. LaRusso cleared a path for them. They’d dashed to the car once outside and made a run for it before anyone could follow them. 

“I’m sorry.” Robby cut in, quietly. “I shouldn’t have done that. The guy just grabbed me and I lost my shit.”

Mr. LaRusso bit his lip, trying to think of something to say, but Johnny got there first. 

“You did nothing wrong, alright.” He said. “Daniel would feel the same the way if some asshole had groped his daughter.”

“I do feel the same way.” Mr. LaRusso said hotly. “It’s just… you could’ve gotten hurt. Johnny should’ve tried to talk things out instead.”

“You were there too.” Johnny replied. “Didn’t see you trying to talk to anyone.”

“I know.” Daniel gritted out. “Look, Robby, the guy was asking for an ass-kicking. Sure. But in a real fight, you never have any way of telling how things would turn out. Getting yourself hurt just isn’t worth it.”

Johnny agreed to that much. None of them had gotten away scot-free after all. And once Mr. LaRusso had had his say, the tension was gone just like that. 

“Your first bar-fight, huh?” Johnny said to him, smiling. “You did real good.”

“Don’t encourage him!” Mr. LaRusso snapped, but he was smiling too. “And you – don’t make a habit of it. Always remember, fighting is not the answer.”

* * *

It’d been a great day. Probably the best one he’d had in his life. And he never wanted it to end. He didn’t even care about their motivations any more. He didn’t care if Johnny was only doing it out of guilt or if Mr. LaRusso was only trying to be nice. He’d imagined a day like this ever since he was a child and it had ended up better than he could’ve ever hoped for. 

But it was going to come to an end soon. They were huddled around the campfire now, eating the fish that Johnny had caught and Mr. LaRusso had prepared and they’d go to sleep soon after. And then they’d leave next morning and it’d be life as usual. 

Maybe that’s what prompted him to risk it all. To risk ruining this nearly perfect day they’d had. Or maybe it was the beer they’d let him drink that night. 

“I want to move out.” Robby said quietly. 

It was almost a whisper but the heard him anyway. They sat there in silence, staring at him with his declaration hanging over them. 

“I have a bunch of money saved up. A-and I think that’s going to be enough.” Robby said when nobody spoke up. “I won’t drop out of school or anything. But I still need to do this. I hope you understand.”

“Out of the question.” Johnny said immediately. “Robby, you are still a kid. I’m not letting you live alone.”

“I’m with him on this.” Mr. LaRusso agreed. “You can’t be on your own.”

Robby sighed. He’d expected this reaction. And he did have his arguments – but he didn’t want to ruin the night. Not after all they’d done to give him such a great day. 

“I know things haven’t been easy for you, okay? I know I haven’t made things easy for you.” Johnny said. “I’m trying to do better. I really am. You have to see that.”

“I do.” Robby agreed. “But I can’t stay there anymore. Not with Miguel still there.”

Johnny looked distressed at that. Robby was putting him in a difficult situation, making him choose between them. But that wasn’t his intention. 

“Did he say something?” Johnny asked. “Or do something? You have to tell me about stuff like that, okay? I’ll talk to him and - ”

“He didn’t do anything.” Robby said, not looking up from the fire. 

Johnny nodded, trying to get a handle on it. “I know you hate him but - ”

“I don’t” Robby cut him off. “I love him.”

“Then…?” Johnny was nonplussed. 

“I mean, I’m in love with him.” Robby clarified. “With Miguel.”

It took him a moment to get it and Robby could hardly blame him. This was too much to even comprehend right away, right?

“Oh…” Johnny said, his face clearing up fractionally. “But I thought you were… I mean, with that girl Tilly…” He took a deep breath. “Robby, it’s okay if you are gay.”

Was that his main takeaway from that? Not the part about Miguel?

“I’m not gay.” Robby said reflexively. 

“But… you just said…” Johnny furrowed his brows looking at him and then at Mr. LaRusso. “Am I missing something here? Miguel is a guy, you like Miguel – so that means you like guys. Doesn’t that mean…?”

“Kids these days don’t like labels, Johnny.” Mr. LaRusso interjected. “They don’t like being defined by words like that.”

Robby rolled his eyes. This was so not about being woke. 

Johnny nodded, trying to take it all in. But then shook his head firmly. “No – there is stuff and there is words to describe that stuff. That’s just how words work.”

“Look, just because he likes guys doesn’t mean he can only like guys, okay?” Mr. LaRusso explained. “He can like girls too. It’s called being bisexual.”

“And that’s not a label?” Johnny argued. 

“Hey! Can we get back to my thing now?” Robby said, annoyed. He’d expected a different reaction – not a debate about the politically correct terminology. 

“Yeah…” Johnny nodded at him. “Look, it’s fine if you have feelings for Miguel. It’s probably just a crush. It’ll go away.”

“I’ve had that crush for three years now.” Robby said. “And it’s not going anywhere.”

_ Here it comes,  _ Robby thought. There was no escaping it now – no looking away from the disgust and the condemnation. Johnny didn’t get it yet. Didn’t fully comprehend the implications of what Robby was saying. He was still blinking and opening and closing his mouth, trying to understand it all. But once he did…

“Johnny, it’s okay.” Mr. LaRusso spoke up. “They are not actually related. They are just teenage boys living together.”

“Yeah, you are right.” Johnny nodded, his relief clear in his face. “Robby, it’s okay. We can figure this out.”

Figure this out?  _ Figure this out?  _ Was that all Johnny had to say about this twisted situation?

“There is nothing to figure out.” Robby said. “You don’t want me corrupting Miguel, do you?”

“Corrupting…?” Johnny frowned. “Did something happen between the two of you? Did he do anything to you?” Johnny saw the caught look on Robby’s face and his own changed. “Robby – did he hurt you?”

Robby didn’t know how to answer. Sure Miguel had hurt him – but that wasn’t his fault. He didn’t know what he was doing back then. And Robby knew he had been wrong about a lot of stuff – like Miguel being in it with Hawk. But Johnny wouldn’t understand – not with how desperate he was to prove himself to Robby. And Robby didn’t want to get Miguel in trouble. Especially with how much Miguel was already beating himself up over it all. 

“He did bully me at first. You know that.” Robby said, carefully. And the sudden guilty look on Johnny’s face told him he had. “But he got nicer. And yeah, we did stuff with each-other.”

“So Miguel likes you too?” Johnny asked, looking a little hopeful. 

“I don’t know.” Robby replied. “I don’t know anything, okay? That’s why I have to-”

“Okay. Okay, I get it.” Johnny said, finally brightening up. “We’ll figure this out, alright. We’ll talk to Miguel and figure something out. It won’t be easy, but you should know, no matter how this shakes out, I won’t feel any different about you.”

Robby looked at him skeptically. That was it? That’s all he had to say? Where was the anger? The disgust? The rage? Why wasn’t Johnny screaming at him, calling him names, threatening to beat this sickness out of him?

“You are kidding right?” Robby said in disbelief. If Johnny was going to be this accepting, then what had been the point of Robby living with the shame all this time? “You are not gonna just accept it like that, are you? Aren’t you worried about me taking advantage of Miguel?”

Johnny looked like Robby had just slapped him and Robby didn’t get it at all. 

“I’m sorry, Robby.” He said, quietly. “I’m sorry I made you feel that I’d react like that. That you couldn’t come to me with anything. But things are different now. I’m different. You don’t have to be afraid to tell me stuff. And you don’t have to move out because of this.”

Robby didn’t have anything to say to that, so Johnny continued. “Look, we can deal with this however you want. If it makes you uncomfortable, we can get you your own room. I’m sure Rosa would be okay moving in with Miguel.”

Robby shook his head. 

This was  _ why  _ he had to move out. The other part of the equation. 

“You still don’t understand.” Robby said. 

“I’m trying to.” Johnny pleaded. 

“Maybe that’s the problem.” Robby snapped unintentionally. “Did you ever think of that? Maybe I don’t want you to be that understanding?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Johnny was perplexed again. “Robby, I know I wasn’t a good dad to you before – but I’m trying to be one now. But you don’t want that either? So… what do you want?”

Robby sighed, exasperated. He wasn’t being fair here. He knew that. Everyone was trying their best and it was like he just wouldn’t let them. Like he didn’t want to be happy – as Dr. Carmichael had told him. But he’d also taught Robby other things – ways to figure out and work through what he was feeling. And he had to do that now.

“Just hear me out, okay?” Robby said and waited for Johnny to nod. “I did something really messed up, okay. I get that now. This - ” he raised his wrists, letting them see the scars. “ – wasn’t the right way to handle anything. And it doesn’t matter how I got there – I just want to do better now. Be better.”

Johnny nodded, waiting for him to continue. 

“But I need to get my own head straight for that.” Robby went on. “This isn’t just about me being in love with Miguel. I also don’t like how you all have been treating me all this time. Walking on eggshells. Afraid to say the wrong thing. Afraid that I’d just breakdown if you do. I want to be treated normally, okay? I mean – look that this day. I screwed up like a thousand times and you let me off the hook every single time. I don’t want to be coddled like that.”

“You didn’t screw up, Robby. I did.” Johnny said, shaking his head. “I screwed you up so bad that you don’t even see that this _was_ a normal day. This is how I should’ve treated you all along.”

“And if that’s true, then I need to feel that on my own.” Robby said, quietly. “Right now, it feels like the only reason you are doing all this is because I tried to kill myself. That that’s the only reason everyone is being nice to me. It makes me feel like… like what I did was the right thing because it made things better for me. And I know I shouldn’t feel like that. I need to get my head on straight and I need to get away from it all to do it. Please tell me you get that?”

He got it. Johnny was the one staring into the fire now, but Robby could see he understood it. 

“I still can’t let you live on your own.” Johnny said. “I know you feel like you need to get away, but trust me, being alone is worse.”

Robby couldn’t disagree. But what other choice did they have?

“You can live with us.” Mr. LaRusso interjected, quietly. “I mean, if Johnny is okay with it and if you really need to – you can stay with us. Just until you figure this out. Is that okay, Johnny?”

Robby felt like a weight had been lifted off of him. This could work, couldn’t it? Sure he felt out of place in his own home even when everyone was being nice to him – but he’d never felt like that in the time he’d spent with the LaRussos. They really had a way of making him feel like he belonged – even Anthony with his eye-rolls and snarking. He looked at Johnny expectantly for an answer. 

“There are conditions.” Johnny said, at long last. “Non-negotiable. I’m not kicking you out. I’m not giving up on you. Or on us. I need you to understand that. Okay?”

Robby nodded, uncertainly. 

“You call me every day. Got it.” Johnny said. “Every single day – I need to hear your voice. I don’t care how busy you are – you call me. And if you don’t – I will. And if you don’t answer, I’ll come over and take you back. Understood?”

Robby nodded, but Johnny wasn’t done. 

“And you spend atleast one of the weekends with us.” Johnny continued. “You are gonna start training with me too. No – not Cobra Kai – just you and me. I need to make sure LaRusso is teaching you all the right stuff. So you come over on weekends, we spend some time together, we train and then you have dinner with us. You can spend the night or I can drop you off – that’s up to you. But that has to happen every weekend.”

Robby was okay with that. Even the training part. He’d always hated the idea of being part of Cobra Kai – of being just one of his dad’s hundred students, but it wasn’t the same if it was one-on-one. 

“You also stay over for special occasions.” Johnny added. “And we get to visit you whenever we want. Not just me – Carmen and Miguel too. And it doesn’t matter that you are living with LaRusso – we still need to talk about you and Miguel. Okay?”

“Yeah.” Robby said, his heart beating really fast. “Yeah, I can do all that.”

“One last thing. I’m only agreeing to this because you said you need it.” Johnny said, his voice breaking a little. “But I want you home. Always. That’s never going to change. So the moment you feel better – like you’ve got a handle on things – I want you to come back to us. Got it? You don’t even have to ask. You can just show with your bags in the middle of the night and you’ll always find your room ready for you.”


	25. Robby XIII

_ It's your own goddamn fault. You wanted this. You asked for this. You have no right to feel jealous.  _

Robby felt like that anyway. No matter what he did, those feelings just wouldn’t go away. 

Maybe he made the wrong choice back then. No – not moving out. That was the right choice. Living with Mr. LaRusso ended up being the best decision he ever made – and weirdly enough, it was all because of Anthony. 

Maybe that was what having an annoying younger sibling really felt like. The kid was a spoilt brat of the highest order. He was aggravating and frustrating for everybody around him – and he was the only one who didn’t treat Robby like he was made of glass. 

“Can I see the scars?” He asked the first day Robby had stayed with them. Everyone had been too shocked to say anything right away – including Robby. No one had had the balls to think of the whole thing as a simple curiosity. 

“Cool!” Anthony said, after taking a look at his wrists and then went back to his video-games. 

Sure he got an earful right away about being sensitive and compassionate, but it never really took. It was like the guy had no filter at all. Somehow, he always managed to say the wrong thing. Like that time Robby got outvoted over where to go for dinner or that time everyone decided to watch a movie Anthony picked. 

“You are not gonna kill yourself, are you?” He asked Robby. “Just because you didn’t get your way?”

“God! Anthony! You make everything worse.” Sam yelled at him. 

“What? I’m saying I  _ don’t  _ want him to kill himself.” Anthony replied. “I’m being nice.”

The two of them bickered for the next ten minutes as Robby tried to decideif he was more surprised or amused. 

Sure Anthony said the wrong thing, but for Robby, the wrong thing was the right one. It made him feel saner. It made him feel like he wasn’t the one being crazy thinking that others were being too nice to him because of what he’d done. That was what he wanted – to be treated normally. Sure he didn’t want to be ignored or sidelined, but he didn’t want to be defined by that one mistake either. He’d much rather have everybody forget about that altogether – or failing that, treat it like it wasn’t that big of a deal. 

So Anthony became an objective point of reference for him. A measuring stick to figure out how much of what the others were doing for him was out of guilt or pity and how much was because they genuinely liked him. It helped him find a way to trust Johnny again – to not look at his every action with suspicion and skepticism. 

After all, if Mr. LaRusso could love Anthony despite him being a colossal brat, maybe Johnny caring about Robby wasn’t so unbelievable. 

It still didn’t help him with his Miguel-problem.

* * *

“It should be me.” Miguel told him a week after Robby moved out. “I should be the one getting kicked out and you should still live at home.”

“I didn’t get kicked out. I chose to move out.” Robby said, hoping Miguel would drop it. 

No such luck. 

“Whatever! You felt like you had to.” Miguel went on. “And you shouldn’t.”

“You just wish you were living in a place with a pool.” Robby scoffed. 

Miguel wasn’t deterred. 

“Robby, don’t deflect. Please.” He pleaded. “I’m being serious.”

Robby sighed. Ofcourse he knew that. But did they need to have the same conversation every time now? It was emotionally exhausting. 

“It’s not just about you. You get that, right?” He asked. 

Miguel nodded. 

Ofocurse, they’d had this conversation before. After Robby had returned from the camping trip and told everyone about his decision. No one had been happy about it, least of all Miguel. To him, it felt like he was driving Robby away. 

“It wasn’t his fault.” He’d said as soon as Johnny had revealed what Robby had told him. “I started it. I was the one who started doing stuff with him. Robby wouldn’t have done anything if not for that. I’m the sicko here. Punish me if you want to. Kick me out. Not him.”

No one was being punished, Johnny assured him. And no one was being kicked out. This was Robby’s decision and while Johnny was most certainly not okay with it, he was accepting it because that was what Robby needed. And it wasn’t like this was permanent. Once Robby figured out what he needed to, he’d be back living with them. 

But Miguel was having a hard time accepting that. 

“You didn’t tell them everything, did you?” He had asked Robby later. “There is no way they’d be okay with it if they knew everything that happened to you. Everything I did. They’d all hate me.”

“No.” Robby had replied. “And you are not gonna either. It’s not just about them hating you, okay? It’s bad enough that everyone looks at me as the guy who tried to kill himself, okay. I don’t want to be the guy who was raped or abused.”

Miguel had made up his mind after that. As far as he was concerned, Robby was moving out because he couldn’t bear to live with him. But he also couldn’t bear the thought of others knowing why not. So he’d made up an excuse about figuring things out – but for Miguel, the truth was that he’d driven Robby away. And nothing Robby said seemed to convince him otherwise. 

“I know that I – we – treated you like crap.” He was saying now. “I wouldn’t want to live with us either.”

“It’s not that.” Robby said, frustrated. “I don’t hate you. That’s… part of the problem.”

Miguel looked at him confused. 

“I should hate you, okay?” Robby explained. “You did hurt me. You made me feel weak and helpless and like a freak. I know you didn’t mean to, but you did. And I should hate you for that, but I don’t. Despite everything, I still want you. I want you to hold me and kiss me and… fuck me.”

“So…?”

“So what does that say about me?” Robby finished. “That I’m some kind of freak who gets off on getting hurt? That I’ll let people walk all over me and come back begging for more? I don’t want to be that guy.”

Miguel nodded quietly, finally understanding. 

“You are not a freak.” He said, finally. “You are a good guy. A great guy. You’ve got a big heart and that’s why you don’t hold anything against me. Hurting you is on me, not you, alright?”

Robby didn’t know what to say to that. Sure he understood it logically. Others had told him the same thing. But it wasn’t how he felt. 

“Let me prove it to you.” Miguel said. “Go out with me.”

Robby stared back.  _ Go out?  _ “You mean a date?”

“Yes.” Miguel replied. “Let’s do this right. We are not living together right now anyway. So let me take you on dates – to dinners and movies and stuff like that. We’ll get to know each-other – like really know each-other. We can kiss and hold hands and all the stupid stuff teenagers are supposed to do. I’ll do things right this time – like I should’ve from the start. I’ll become someone who actually deserves your love.”

Robby’s heart was pounding at the proposal. He wanted this, he realized. To be with Miguel as his boyfriend. To have something between them that wasn’t just about sex or anger. To fall in love with him all over again. And Miguel wanted it too, judging by that eager, desperate look on his face. 

Robby hated having to break his heart like that. 

“No.” Robby shook his head. “If we do that, I’ll never know if I’m really with you because I love you or because I think I don’t deserve better. And I need to figure that out. For myself. Tell me you get that?”

Miguel was crushed. Robby could see that in his eyes. But he didn’t argue any further.

“You do deserve better.” He said. “And I want you to find it too. I just wish I could’ve been that guy for you.” 

* * *

That was his mistake – Robby realized later. That had been his chance. If he’d just agreed to Miguel’s proposal, they could’ve been together and happy now. But once again, he’d thrown away the chance life had given him. 

They weren’t estranged. If anything, they were closer now than they’d ever been before. Boyfriend or not, Miguel still wanted Robby in his life. He made that really clear. And he was willing to pay any price to have that. Even if it meant seeing someone else touching Robby like he wanted to. 

And there were plenty of someone elses. 

Sam was the first – once Robby figured out that Mr. LaRusso really wouldn’t see it as a betrayal. And that Sam wasn’t just doing it out of pity. 

He’d tried to keep his distance, ofocurse. Told her that he didn’t want to screw things up for himself after they almost kissed. And Sam had respected that – for about a few weeks. 

“You are so full of shit, you know that?” She said to him. “You can’t be scared to go after what you want just because you are afraid you’ll screw up what you have. You are not gonna lose anyone if you do.”

So he went for it. Grabbed her and kissed her and felt a warm glow when he felt her kiss him back. Sam was right. Years had made him wary of asking for what he wanted, but things were different now. Maybe it could work out.

And even if it didn’t, maybe it didn’t have to ruin everything else. Because things with Sam lasted about two weeks.

Ofcourse he’d wanted her. Sam was smart, popular, funny and oh-so-beautiful – who wouldn’t want her? Or so he’d thought. Once the rush of the first kiss was over, Robby had felt weird about the whole thing. And it took him a while to put his finger on it. 

At first, he’d figured his own issues were getting in the way. That he’d spent so much time in a messed-up relationship with Miguel that this “normal” one felt weird. But he wasn’t the only one. He started noticing the hesitation in her touches as well. 

It was like being with your sister, Robby realized. But that made absolutely no sense. Miguel was the one he was actually supposed to see as a brother and that had never dampened his desire. And he hadn’t even known Sam for that long. 

But that’s how it was. And it seemed like Sam felt the same way. 

“This feels wrong.” Robby said, pulling away from the kiss. “It feels like…”

“…like kissing my brother.” Sam finished, disappointed. “I’m sorry.”

“No – it’s okay. It needs to be right for both of us. And it’s not. For either. Right?”

Sam nodded. “This doesn’t change anything, though.”

And it didn’t. Even though they weren’t together, Sam remained the sweet friend to him she’d always been. It just meant Robby had to look for love elsewhere. 

Maybe girls just weren’t for him. That was the conclusion Robby came to after Moon. 

Sure she had been Hawk’s girlfriend first, but then she’d dumped him for becoming a bully, so Robby couldn’t hold that against her. And sure she was a little spacey and kinda cooky – but there wasn’t an ounce of malice in her. She just wanted everyone to be friends and to get along. It was like she was made up of boundless optimism. 

After more than a few dark and depressing years, Robby had hoped that some of that positivity would rub off on him. That being around someone who was happy all the time would show him how to be happy again as well. 

If only things were that simple. 

That kind of happiness didn’t look real to him. It felt shallow and superficial. And it was a shitty thing to think. Just because he’d had a miserable life didn’t mean he had to resent others for their easy one. But he didn’t have to put up with it either. 

The bigger problem, however, was that neither Sam nor Moon was able to light that fire in him. He never felt that burning desire for them like he had with Miguel. Like he still did whenever he thought about him. 

* * *

So maybe he was gay after all. 

And there was nothing wrong with that – according to absolutely everybody in his life. Not that that had ever been the problem.

“Miguel did tell me, you know?” Johnny told him on one of their afternoons together. “He told me that he wasn’t always good to you about that stuff.”

“What did he tell you?” Robby asked, chilled. Miguel wouldn’t have revealed everything, right?

“That he used how you felt against you. To punish you whenever he was angry with you.” Johnny said. “That he let others do the same thing. I’m sorry about all of that.”

“It wasn’t your fault.” Robby assured him.

“It kind of was.” Johnny argued. “I kind of set a bad example for everybody. I taught all the wrong things about how they should be and how it was okay to go after someone for being… different. I’m changing things now at the dojo. I just wish I’d changed a lot more a lot sooner. Maybe you wouldn’t have gotten hurt if I had.”

Robby nodded quietly, wiping the sweat off his forehead. It seemed like their weekly sparring sessions were turning out to be good for both of them. Sure Robby was learning new techniques – moves that complemented the stuff he learned from Mr. LaRusso – and it seemed like Johnny was learning from him too. 

Johnny would never steal LaRusso’s moves. He’d been upfront about that right away. But the other Miyagi-Do teachings – like fighting for self-defense, letting go of anger, finding balance – that were some of the things Cobra-Kai really needed. Johnny would’ve never learned that from Mr. LaRusso, but he was learning it from Robby. 

“It still wasn’t your fault.” Robby insisted. “You weren’t the only one teaching them, alright. And I know you wouldn’t teach them the kind of crap they pulled.”

Johnny nodded. “Miguel told me about that too. Stuff like painting that… word on your locker. Stealing your clothes. Calling you names. And bullying you before that. Robby, the thing is, you should’ve come to me for that.”

Why didn’t he? Robby tried to remember the reason for it. It seemed so obvious now. Johnny never would’ve stood for all that crap. No matter what was going on between them, he’d have still put a stop to it. 

“Did you think I wouldn’t take your side?” Johnny asked. “That I’d just tell you to suck it up?”

It had felt like that, hadn’t it? 

“Sorry.” Robby said quietly. 

“Don’t be. That’s where I really went wrong.” Johnny replied. “That was my screwup too. You should’ve felt safe enough to come to me for anything. In fact, it should’ve never come to that. You were hurting and it was my job to pay attention and notice that.”

It was Robby’s turn to nod. That was something they both agreed on. They both wished Johnny had paid more attention a lot sooner. And now there was no making up for the lost time. But things were getting better. Robby was starting to feel like he could trust Johnny again. 

“I don’t know how to deal with Miguel.” Robby confessed. “How to handle my feelings for him. I don’t want to be in love with him, but no matter what I do, this just won’t go away.”

Johnny looked like he was giving it some thought. “Miguel says he’s in love with you too. If this is something you both want and you are just worried about what people would think…”

“It’s not that.” Robby said. “I just... don’t think it’s healthy.”

“Did I ever tell you about Ali?” Johnny asked after some consideration. 

“Mr. LaRusso did. She was the girl you guys fought over, wasn’t she?” 

Johnny nodded. “Yeah. And for the longest time, I thought she was the one. And I kept thinking that I let my “one” get away. That was before I met Carmen.”

“So… I should just find someone and get over Miguel?” Robby frowned. He had been trying that already. 

“The thing is – I don’t think I actually ever got over Ali.” Johnny elaborated. “And I certainly didn’t think Carmen was going to be the one when I started dating her. But the longer I stayed with Carmen, the less I thought about Ali and after a while, she just, kinda, faded into the background.”

Robby stared at him, confused. So what was the lesson here?

“What I’m saying is, don’t worry about it too much.” Johnny explained. “I let my fixation mess up a lot of good relationships just because I thought I was supposed to be with someone. Just try to focus on your own life here instead of trying to change the way you feel. If someone comes along that you like – give them a fair shot. And if they end up being the one, your feelings for Miguel won’t matter anymore. And if it ends up being Miguel, that’s okay too. Just don’t let this stand in the way of everything else.”

Robby nodded, absorbing it. That did sound like good advice. There was more to life than finding a boyfriend, after all. And he had plenty of time to find love. Young love never lasted – that’s what everyone told him. No matter how much it felt like he’d feel like this for ever, time and experience always changed things. He just had to go along with it. 

And maybe, someone would come along some day and turn Miguel into a distant memory. 

* * *

Could Xander be that guy?

Robby hadn’t meant to stare, but the guy was hot. Fresh out of the shower after the tournament with a towel around his waist, the guy looked like something right out of a teenage girl’s fantasy. Robby had let his gaze linger and then flushed with embarrassment as he was caught looking.

_ Shit. He’s coming over.  _ Robby thought, trying to figure out a way out of this. 

“You were pretty awesome out there tonight.” Xander said when he was beside him. “Congrats.”

Robby nodded awkwardly. The guy shouldn’t have been that nice. Robby had beaten him 3-0 in the finals and he should’ve felt humiliated, right?

Winning the tournament this year didn’t feel as great as it should have. It’d felt more like unfinished business to him, but it wasn’t the same without Miguel or Sam participating. Still, the reason Robby had really done it was because he wanted to be known as something other than the boy-who-tried-to-kill-himself and maybe now, he would be.

“You wanna hang out sometime?” Xander asked. “Show me some of your moves?”

“Like a date?” Robby asked.

It was Xander’s turn to stare awkwardly at his feet. “Maybe. I mean – if you want to.”

_ Give them a fair shot, right? _

“Sure.” Robby said. “That sounds like fun.”

Xander smiled. Then he looked around and once he was sure that no one was paying attention, he dropped a quick kiss on Robby’s lips before going back to his locker. 

“The guy is such a faker.” Miguel said, annoyed. “That whole stupid speech – what was he thinking?”

“You’re just jealous that he gets to have all this.” Robby quipped, pointing to himself. 

“Ofcourse, I’m jealous.” Miguel scowled. “I’m always gonna be jealous. But that’s not what this is about. You deserve someone better. And Xander’s not good enough for you.”

“And how am I supposed to know that without going out with him?” Robby replied. 

But Miguel ended up being right in the end. Not about Xander not being good enough – he was a great guy. He just wasn’t for Robby. He figured that out the first time they… “made love”. It made him feel weird even thinking about it like that, but there was no other way to describe it. 

Xander fucked like he fought – slow, gentle and soft. He was different from Miguel in a thousand different ways and just as disappointing. He didn’t give Robby any real cause for complaint – not as he pushed into him in measured thrusts. But there was no passion there – no desperation that made Robby feel needed. Or wanted. 

He did give it a fair shot. Nobody could say that he didn’t. He stuck with Xander, hoping the passion would come eventually. But it never did and they both knew it was over at the same time. 

* * *

It took him a long time and two more relationships to realize it, but Miguel was the one for him after all. Despite all their baggage, no one could make him feel like Miguel did. And whatever chance Robby would’ve had, he blew it ages ago.

Ofocurse Miguel had waited for him. Hung around hoping he’d come to his senses. But Robby had been the one to dissuade him. 

“Look, I want to put this all behind us. But I can’t do that with you punishing yourself like that every day.” Robby told him. 

“I’m not.” Miguel replied. “I’m fine.”

“Really?” Robby asked. “Giving up karate? Not dating anyone? Not talking to your Cobra-Kai friends? Not spending any time with dad? Are you really okay with all that?”

“They are not my friends anymore. Not after what they did to you.” That was the only thing Miguel had to say. 

He couldn’t deny the rest and Robby knew he couldn’t let things stand like that. He’d been there before – pulling away from the world because he felt like he deserved it and he knew where that road led. He couldn’t let Miguel walk down the same path. 

“You don’t deserve to live like that.” Robby told him. 

“Maybe I do.” Miguel replied quietly. 

“Well – then I don’t deserve that.” Robby countered. “I don’t deserve to feel like someone is miserable because of me.”

That worked. It took some time, but Miguel joined Cobra Kai again and while Johnny’s Saturday afternoons were still reserved for Robby alone, Miguel ended up having his own time with his father. 

And he started dating Tory again. 

It shouldn’t have hurt like that. It shouldn’t have bothered Robby this much. This was what he’d wanted, after all. What he’d insisted on. He wasn’t going to get over Miguel unless Miguel got over him too and Miguel was doing that. 

He’d screwed this up again, hadn’t he? They could’ve had something if only he’d gotten his head out of his ass sooner. If only he’d accepted Miguel’s proposal. But it was too late now. Tory didn’t last, but there was another girl after that and another one after her and it was finally clear that Miguel was over whatever feelings he’d had for Robby. 

And they were both going off to college soon and there would be no coming back from that. 

* * *

“I didn’t plan this. I swear.” Miguel insisted. 

Robby rolled his eyes. He may not have planned on “this” exactly, but it was still down to him. None of this would be happening if Miguel had just made the smart choice. 

Miguel was smart, after all. No matter what was going on in their lives, he’d still kept his grades up. And he had the academic record required to get into an Ivy League school. And he had. UCLA was a safety school for him, while it was a long shot for Robby. 

Robby still couldn’t believe he’d gotten in. Maybe it was his essay about the darkest time of his life and what it took to come out of it, because his grades alone wouldn’t have been up to the snuff. But he’d still gotten in and he’d been damn proud of that. 

And Miguel had told them he was choosing UCLA as well. 

It was because of Robby – he hadn’t even tried to deny that. And Robby found it condescending. Sure college could be a hard time, but he didn’t need a babysitter. He knew people were worried about him, but wasn’t going to go back to how things were. He was sure of that. 

And he certainly wasn’t going to get over Miguel with him hovering around like that. 

“Dude, I just want to be close to you.” Miguel insisted. “Isn’t that good enough?”

Maybe it could be, Robby told himself. It was a big campus, after all, and it wasn’t like they’d be in the same classes. Things would be the same as they’d been for the last two years – with them hanging out, but leading their separate lives. 

No one had expected them to end up in the same room. 

“It’s their stupid matching algorithm.” Miguel said. “Bet they fucked something up.”

“Maybe.” Robby replied quietly. 

The college cared about roommates being compatible, the brochure had said. So during registration, everyone had to fill in a form describing themselves and what they preferred in their roommate and their proprietary algorithm was supposed to find them the right one. Except, something must have gone wrong for them to match him with Miguel. Some sick, cruel joke the universe was playing, forcing him to watch Miguel find happiness in other relationships. 

Or maybe something went right. Now that he thought about it, a lot of qualities Robby had said he wanted in a roommate did happen to match Miguel. And it must have been the same way around as well.

“I’ll talk to the RA.” Miguel assured him. “Sort this out.”

“Don’t.” Robby replied impulsively. Then he considered it for a moment. The more he thought about it… “It’s okay. We can do the roommate thing right this time.”

Miguel was looking at him weirdly, Robby realized. Like he was struggling with some internal conflict.

“I’m not sure I can keep my hands off you if we are living together in the same room.” He said. 

_ He’s not over me either,  _ Robby realized with a rush. Maybe this wasn’t a sick joke after all. Maybe this was the second chance. A chance to correct his previous mistake. 

“Would you go out with me?” Robby asked him this time. “Like, on a date?”

Miguel blinked, confused. And then hopeful. 

“You sure?”

“Yes.” Robby replied. He’d never been more certain of anything in his life. 

Miguel was on him the very next moment, kissing him, hands trailing down his back and pulling him closer. And Robby surrendered to the kiss, wrapping his arms around his neck and pulling himself up before wrapping his legs around him. Miguel stumbled back under his weight before falling on to the bed with Robby riding on his lap. 

This was the Miguel he had fallen in love with, Robby realized. Not the one who could be mean and hurtful, but this one – one who had a way of making him feel wanted and loved. The one who touched him in a way that felt like he couldn’t get enough. 

“You’re sure too, right?” Robby asked, pulling him away from his neck. “I mean, aren’t you with-?”

“No.” Miguel replied immediately. “We broke things off before I came here. It didn’t feel right anyway. I was just dating her to get over you, but nobody has felt right.”

“It’s still fucked up, right?” Robby said, even as he couldn’t resist grinding himself on Miguel’s lap. 

“Not at all.” Miguel replied, sucking a bruise on his collarbone. “It’s not like we are brothers or anything.”

**END.**


End file.
